Intensive Care: Escape to the Country (14 page)

She couldn’t understand why Joel was being so pushy. His holier-than-thou attitude was starting to annoy her and she wondered where it was coming from. She supposed he might have been speaking from experience but she was tired of hearing the same thing from everyone.
Forgive him!
Argh. It was making her blood boil. Perhaps if she told him about the baby he would understand why she could never forgive Marcus. And why she could never go back to him.

“Sure we can. I will drop it for now. But Kate, promise me something okay? Don’t let unforgiveness become hatred and turn into bitterness because it’s a slippery slope that only goes in one direction.” He smiled at her and for a moment she was lost in his eyes, forgetting her previous annoyance. “Now, do you want the fruit salad or the sticky date pudding?”

The rest of the evening was spent chatting about much safer topics of conversation and Kate found herself thoroughly enjoying their time together. Later that night, when he turned down the driveway, the beam of his headlights highlighted the old farmhouse.

Should I ask him in, or is it too soon?

She shook her head to clear the thought. Perhaps she had just been lulled into a false sense of security after their enjoyable evening together. What she really needed was a friend, not a new relationship, and a casual fling certainly wasn’t her style. Plus there was so much baggage between the two of them.
Probably not the best way to start any relationship.
Her thoughts continued to whirl around in her head.

Thankfully as Joel pulled to a stop at the front door he saved Kate from having to make the offer. He undid his seatbelt and came around to open her door, holding her hand as he helped her step down from the car. Her fingers tingled at his touch. He must have sensed it too because he quickly let go of her hand. Kate wished she could see his face more clearly, but it was too difficult in the inky darkness.

“Kate Kennedy, it has been an absolute pleasure having dinner with you. Thank you for letting me explain about Beck and thanks for opening up and telling me about Marcus. I’ve had a wonderful night and I’d love to do it again sometime.”

He led her up the steps by her elbow and she stood at the front door, shifting her feet to keep warm. She looked up at him. In the movies this was the moment when the guy would lean in and kiss the girl good night but he didn’t move toward her. He seemed to be waiting for her to say something. Her heart raced while her brain screamed a mantra.
Just friends, just friends!

“Thank
you
,
Joel. I’ve had a lovely night and I’d love to go out with you again too.”

Joel shoved his hands deep inside the pockets of his pants and took the two steps off the veranda in one stride, breaking the moment and the mood. He was almost at his car when Kate called out to him.

“So, when do you want to catch up again?” She hoped he didn’t think she was being too pushy.

He turned around to face her. “I’m really busy this week. Next time you’re in the café, we’ll make some plans.”

Kate felt slightly rejected at his lack of commitment. She forced a smile and tried not to show her disappointment. She waited until he drove down the driveway before closing the front door, blocking out the myriad of confusing feelings that were swirling around in the cold night air like moths circling a light.

Once again she reminded herself that he was just a friend. And right now she needed a friend more than she needed a lover.

After a month of dreary days and cold nights, spring felt as though it had arrived unexpectedly early in Birrangulla, and the fresh air made Kate feel awake and alive. Matilda had spent the morning sprawled on the carpet in a patch of sun, moving from time to time to stay in the sunlight as it moved around the house. Outside the birds were chirping and the wind was gently blowing some of the new blossoms off the trees in the backyard, creating the effect of pink confetti lying on the grass. It was picture perfect and Kate felt a sense of peace wash over her. There was nothing better than lazy Saturday mornings.

When she had arrived home after her run she had opened all the windows to give the rooms an airing. She had washed all her towels and bed linen, and the large white sheets were now billowing in the breeze where they were pegged on the old Hills hoist rotary clothesline in the backyard.

Kate was enjoying the warm sunshine on the back veranda just after lunch when she heard a car on the gravel driveway. She went around the side of the house to see who it was, smiling when she saw it was Joel. She hadn’t expected it would be anyone else. His large four-wheel drive was completely covered in mud and looked out of place beside Kate’s Mini. She had only just washed it that morning and it gleamed in the sun.

“Hi,” she said when he silenced the engine and climbed from the cab. “What are you doing here?” It was taking Kate a while to get used to Joel’s impulsive and carefree nature. He wasn’t one to make plans, but generally acted spontaneously.

“I wanted to come back and see the house in the daylight. Today seemed like the perfect day. I was in the area and thought I’d drop in.”

“In the area?”

“My farm is just a bit farther up Eagles Ridge Road.”

“Oh.” He had mentioned once that they were nearly neighbors but she didn’t realize how close they apparently were.

“So, do you wanna show me around then, eh love?”

After a quick tour of the backyard and the dilapidated chook sheds and veggie gardens, Kate made them both a cup of tea. They sat side by side in the sunshine on the back veranda in her new chairs, sipping their drinks and surveying the backyard and beyond.

“This really is a great place you’ve got here, Kate. You kicked a goal I’d say. How long is the lease for?”

“It is a great place, I agree. I’ve taken out a twelve-month lease but I hope I can stay longer. The owners are living in Sydney and haven’t decided whether they want to sell the place or move back here. It’s all pretty much up in the air.”

“So you’re planning on hanging around then?”

“Why wouldn’t I?” Kate turned and looked at him, not understanding why he was asking the question.

“Well you keep saying you’re finding things tough going at work, making friends and all that. I just wondered whether you were going to pull the pin and head back to Sydney.”

“I’m not a quitter, Joel.” Irritation bubbled up within her.

“I didn’t say you were.”

“But you were suggesting it,” Kate retorted.

“I’m sorry, Kate. I didn’t mean to offend you.” He sounded apologetic.

“That’s okay. I’m sorry I snapped at you. It’s just that when I’m out here I feel so relaxed and I manage to forget about feeling lonely. And on days like this …” Kate sighed and pointed toward the deep blue sky, leaving her sentence unfinished.

“I know exactly what you mean,” Joel responded, thankfully taking her cue not to discuss work. “But don’t get too excited, it could still snow tomorrow.”

“You’re kidding me? It’s nearly spring. There’s not even a cloud in the sky!”

“Yep, that’s just God, lulling you into a false sense of security,” Joel chuckled. “It often snows in August.”

“Well I’d say that’s not a very nice God!”

“So, what are your plans with the veggie gardens?” Changing the subject again, Joel pointed toward the neglected back corner of the yard they had just checked out.

“Since I arrived it’s been too cold to even think about it. I really want to grow veggies but I have no idea where to start. And if you ask my brother he’ll tell you I don’t have a green thumb, I have a black thumb. I even manage to kill plastic plants.”

Joel grinned at her. “I’m sure you’re not that bad. I could help you if you like. I’ve got plenty of seedlings out at the farm that I can give you.”

“Hey, yeah, what’s this farm you’ve talked about? I remember you mentioning it ages ago but I haven’t asked you about it again.”

“Oh, it’s an organic farm I’m starting up. It’s just up the road from here.”

“What sort of farm?”

“Organic. No pesticides or anything. I’m going to call it Eagles Ridge Farm. I planted berries when I moved back up here. My plan is to have a little café out on the property where people can come and pick berries and enjoy excellent coffee. Maybe some homemade cakes and slices afterward, if I can convince me mum to do the cooking for me. I’m also growing my own veggies and I’ve got some beehives. I plan to start a farmer’s market out there every Saturday morning and get other farmers to bring in their produce to the farm and sell it. I’ve also got some pigs and beef cattle too.” Joel paused and took a deep breath.

“Wow. I can tell how excited you are about this. I’d love to see it. When do you hope to open the café?”

“I’d love to have it open by mid-November,” Joel said, “but I’m realistic that it might not happen ’til after Christmas.”

“That’s awesome, Joel.” Kate reached out and touched his forearm, feeling the strength of the muscles beneath his thin cotton shirt.

As she made contact, she felt a trickle of anticipation shoot through her. Knowing she was blushing, she removed her hand and at the same time Joel turned somewhat brusquely away from her. He’d felt it too. She frowned. Why then had he pulled away from her light touch as though he’d walked into an electric fence?

“So your dad has obviously changed his opinions about you getting your hands dirty?” Kate asked, trying to shift her mind away from what had just happened between them.

Joel chuckled and she wondered if she’d just imagined his reaction to her touch. “Absolutely! After Mum got sick, Dad realized how important it was for her to eat organic food. They stopped buying the stuff you get in the supermarket that’s all sprayed with chemicals. Dad started buying organic food online and it cost him a fortune. So while Dad was with Mum in hospital I started a small veggie garden in his backyard. Once he saw how easy it was to grow things, he started to understand why I was so passionate about starting my own organic farm. It took him a while to come around, but he’s my number one supporter now.”

“And the Bean Counter? What will you do with that?” Kate was thinking selfishly, wondering where she was going to buy her coffee if he focused all his efforts on the farm.

“Emma will take over running the café until we decide what to do with it. She doesn’t know what she wants to do with her life yet – you remember what you were like at that age – so until she makes some plans for her own future, this will be a great thing for her to do.”

“That’s great.” Kate reached out to touch him again and was disappointed when he moved out of her reach. She was certain this time she hadn’t imagined his reaction to her.

“Let me know when you want to get started on the garden and I’d be happy to come over and help.” Joel stood up and turned on his heel to head back inside.

A cloud appeared from nowhere and covered the sun, bringing with it a reminder that summer was still some time away. Kate shivered, rubbing her arms, uncertain whether it was from the chill of the breeze or because of the way Joel was behaving. He opened the screen door and went back inside the kitchen. Kate followed him and the back door slammed shut behind her, caught by a gust of wind that had sprung up from nowhere.

Touching his arm had ignited an emotion within her, reminding her of how she had felt after their dinner date the previous week. She’d wanted to invite him back inside, hoping for more than just coffee. She was shocked by the range of emotions he was evoking within her and it took everything within her not to reach out and touch him again to see if it had the same effect. She stopped and reminded herself of her new mantra.
Just friends. Just friends.

She stood watching him for a few minutes, his back to her as he stood at her kitchen sink rinsing his mug. His eyes gazed out across the backyard, and she could tell by the way he was standing that something was troubling him. His broad shoulders caused the back of his shirt to be pulled taut as he washed and dried the mug and Kate found herself longing to put her hands under his shirt and rub his strong back, soothing away all the hurt that he was clearly carrying.

He must be thinking about Rebecca.

“I suppose you want some chooks too?” His question snapped her back to reality.

“Yes, I’d love to have some chickens. But I don’t know the first thing about them. What comes first? The chicken or the egg?” Kate tried to lighten the mood between them that had changed as abruptly as the weather outside.

“For an intelligent woman, Kate Kennedy, you can be quite silly.” Joel’s teasing tone was back and Kate returned his smile. Gone was his pensive expression and the familiar dimples had returned.

“I’ll get you some chickens but first I’ll have to come back and fix up the gaps in the chook sheds or the foxes will get to them. Perhaps I can come and do that during the week sometime after work if you like.”

The tension between them had vanished in an instant, and she was sure she had imagined it.

“I’d like that a lot,” Kate replied.

“So, do you want to watch a movie?” Joel asked, eyeing off Kate’s impressive DVD selection in the adjoining lounge room.

“Sure. You can choose. But be warned, I like romantic comedies.”

“So I see,” Joel teased, tilting his head sideways to read the titles on the spines of the DVD cases.

Kate turned on the television and while she waited for Joel to pick a movie, she closed all the windows she had opened earlier. The morning sunshine had been short-lived and more clouds were gathering outside, bringing with them an unexpected chill to the air. She shivered.

“I told you to expect snow,” Joel warned.

“I can’t believe how quickly the weather changes around here.” Kate rubbed her bare arms. “I think I’m going to need to get changed. What was I thinking wearing a T-shirt?”

“Well, I wasn’t going to say anything, but I was wondering why you were only wearing a T-shirt.”

“It was warm and sunny this morning and I was still hot after my run!” Kate playfully punched Joel on the arm.

“Go get changed into some warmer clothes. I’ll just grab my jumper from the car and then I’ll light the fire,” Joel said.

“Sounds perfect.”

When Kate came back a few minutes later she flopped onto the couch and made herself comfortable. She watched as Joel expertly balled up old newspapers and lay the kindling in a tented shape in the fireplace. He had pulled on a well-worn navy blue woolen jumper over his pale blue and white checked shirt. Paired with his moleskins and brown leather boots, the effect was that of a country farmer. All that was missing was his Akubra, which she knew would be on the front seat of his car. No wonder the television program
Farmer Wants a Wife
was so popular among women her age when men like Joel made farmers look like that. The way he dressed was a far cry from how Marcus looked. Even when Marcus took his suit off to relax, he still managed to look uptight in his preppy weekend clothes.

“I can see you’ve had plenty of practice doing this.” She tried to divert her mind away from a comparison of the two men and how good Joel looked and onto safer topics.

“I don’t have an open fire at home, so any chance I get I like to play around a bit and light a fire.”

“Well you’ve got more patience than me. I never get the kindling set properly and end up going through great wads of paper trying to get the thing lit. I love the open fire but in the end I had to go and buy some heaters to warm the house when I haven’t got time,” Kate said.

He grinned at her. “You just have to know how to do it properly, love.”

Joel lit the match and the paper and kindling burst into flames, proving he was right. He waited for the right moment to add larger pieces of firewood. While he continued to play with the fire, Kate inserted the disk he had chosen into the DVD player, secretly pleased with his selection – it was one of her favorite movies.

An hour later Kate was still immersed in the movie and as she reached for the box of tissues she became aware that Joel was losing interest. She hit the pause button.

“Want to stop for a drink or something?” Joel asked when she turned to look at him.

“Sure.” Kate changed position on the couch to look at Joel. “I take it you’re not getting into this movie?”

“Well …” He left the rest of his sentence unfinished.

“You chose it,” she teased him.

“True.” He grinned apologetically. “But it’s not like there was much else in the way of choice.”

“Fair point,” Kate conceded, smiling back at him. “So what do you want to drink? I’m not going to offer
you
a coffee,” she giggled. “I’ve only got instant. But I can make you another cup of tea if you’d like.”

“Have you got any Milo?”

“No, but I’m pretty sure I’ve got some Cadbury drinking chocolate left.”

“Perfect. Any marshmallows?”

Kate moved the cushions she was cuddling and swung her legs off the couch, ready to get up and make their drinks. “I think I might still have some in the pantry – if I haven’t already eaten them all.”

“Stay here.” Joel was already standing. “I’ll make them. Do you want a hot chocolate too?”

“Yes please, Joel. That’d be lovely. You’ll find mugs in the cupboard above the kettle and everything else will be in the pantry. I’ve only got light milk though.”

“That’s fine.”

Kate watched as Joel walked out of the room and felt a sense of peace as she watched how naturally he moved around her home.

“Joel?”

His head popped around the kitchen door and he gave her a questioning gaze. “Yes?”