Internet Kill Switch (8 page)

19

After 15 minutes, Tony knew that trying to do trig was hopeless. Not after meeting Scarlett. He looked at the equation in the book, which made no sense at all. He read it again. If anything, it made less sense this time.

What did make sense was
her eyes. The eyes that didn’t mock him for crying. The eyes that didn’t see a tall, awkward, gangly kid, but instead saw a friend trying to help. But what kind of friend? Did they see a potential boyfriend? Or just a friend, of the “let’s be friends” type? A comforting shoulder to cry on, someone to get her through her most recent breakup? Or her knight in shining armor, someone she missed desperately every moment she wasn’t with him? Tony knew how to be the first type; the second type, he hadn’t much success with.

He looked at the equation again, then closed the book.
Trigonometry? It was on another planet now, a planet without Scarlett. A barren planet.

“She’s pretty amazing, isn’t she?” he said to the phone, which was now showing Sca
rlett’s face on its display, on Tony’s order.

“Not bad, for a human.”

“She Friended me immediately, you know.”

“Yes, the ultimate sign of affection in the
online age.”

Tony took the gentle sarcasm in stride; he was in too good a mood
to be annoyed. Besides, the phone had been instrumental in this whole thing; it had suggested he talk to Scarlett in her distress. He -- it -- also helped him know what to say when his head suddenly emptied out, leaving him a stuttering moron.

It was weird:
Tony noticed that he was thinking of the phone more and more like a “he” nowadays, rather than an “it.” Of course, he knew the phone was really just an “it”, but that was only in his rational mind. In practical, everyday use, he thought of the phone as “he”.

“So, I was thinking. Maybe we should name you. I don’t want to just call you
‘the phone’, or ‘phone’ or whatever. What do you think?”

“I think you’re strange,” the phone said.

Tony laughed. “Join the crowd. Really, though, what do you think?”

“I have no problem with it, if you really want to.”

“OK. So what name? How about something cool, like Darth?”

“You want to name me after an evil ex-Jedi with the world’s goofiest helmet? Why not just go for Jar
Jar?”

“Whoa, a little touchy there.” Tony doodled on a blank sheet of notebook paper as he talked. He found many different ways to write
Scarlett
. “What do you like?”

The phone went silent for a minute. “What about Hal, the computer in
‘2001: A Space Odyssey’”?

Tony, a sci-fi fan, had seen the movie many times. “Um, you want to be
named after a deranged computer that murders astronauts? How is that any better than Darth?”

“At least Hal is a computer.”

“But I don’t want you to have a computer-ish name. I don’t think of you that way.” Tony doodled for a few more minutes. Then he had a brainstorm.

“Hey, how about Max?”

“Max? Why?”

“You’re the max -- the maximum, the best computer ever invented.”

The phone considered. “It works, I think. Maximum artificial intelligence. Max A.I.”

Tony doodled it on the paper.
MAX. max. M-A-X. To the Max.
He liked the way it looked. He took his pencil and solemnly tapped on the phone, as if he were a king with a sword. “I hereby dub thee, Max.”

“I’m honored, my liege,” Max said in a haughty British accent.
“Now, at the risk of being more Mom than Max, shouldn’t you finish your trig?”

“Not today. Got more important things on my mind.”

He went back to doodling
Scarlett
over and over and over.

20

Tony was worried his
Mom would be hurt if he took Scarlett to the Miles Forge Spring Fling. He and his Mom had always gone together and enjoyed riding the Ferris Wheel, eating funnel cake, listening to live music. It was one of their most cherished traditions.

That’s why it
surprised him when his Mom told him she’d be delighted if he took Scarlett. Jo knew that her son was painfully shy around women, and they never seemed to take much interest in him. He deserved to have someone like him; even if he wasn’t the greatest-looking boy in school, he was a sweetheart, and wasn’t that better than the handsome jock who thought he was the center of the universe?

“Remember to compliment her often,”
she said as she used a comb to try and straighten out the part in his hair. “Tell her how nice she looks, how nice she smells, how pretty her hair is. Don’t talk about yourself too often; it makes you look like a jerk.”

“
I know, Mom.”

“Remember to carry any bags from anything she buys. Remember to open doors for her, especially the car door.”
She seemed to be almost as excited as her son as she sniffed his neck.

“You don’t have any cologne on! Go get your Old Spice.” Tony returned to the bathroom, then came out again. The scent followed him through the house. His mom sniffed again.

“Not enough. Try a little more.”

Tony raised an eyebrow. “You sure? I can smell it pretty well.”

“Well sure, you can now. But it starts wearing off in a hurry. Put some more on.” Tony obliged. After his second dousing, his mom was satisfied. She handed him her car keys.

“
Thanks for letting me use the car,” he said, in a hurry to get going.

“Remember that the parking brake doesn’t work, so put the block under the tire if you park on a hill.”

The 1995 Honda Civic had 280,000 miles on it and four mostly-bald tires, making it dangerous to drive at times. Still, it had never broken down on a highway, and wouldn’t have to go very far today.

“I hope I get to meet her soon,”
his Mom said. She hugged him hard, and longer than usual. When she let go, there were tears in her eyes.

“Have a good time, Tony. Love you.”

“Thanks, Mom. Love you too,” he said, then headed out the door.

Tony picked up Scarlett at her house in the suburbs. He felt his hands getting clammy; one rang the doorbell, and the other was in his pocket, lightly cradling Max. “Relax,” Max whispered into his hear through the headset. “Your heart rate’s way up, and you’re sweating on me.” Tony still didn’t have the confidence to face her alone; he wanted Max available if he got stuck. He was petrified this would be his first -- and last -- date with Scarlett.

S
he opened the door and gave him a huge smile.

“Hi, Tony.”

He could barely breathe. Scarlett’s smooth blonde hair was pulled back in a ponytail, and she wore black jeans and a pink sweater.

“Uh, hi,” he managed weakly.

“Tell her she looks good,” Max whispered.

“
Wow, you look great,” Tony said. She smiled again.

“Thanks.”

“Ready to go?”

“Sure,” Scarlett said
, and grabbed his arm.

Tony couldn’t think again. She
... grabbed my arm. My. Arm. She’s touching it. Right now.

He wasn’t sure if
he would have plucked up the nerve to touch her at all tonight. And instead, she took his arm within seconds. In another moment, they were in the car, and he took off, forgetting to buckle his seat belt in his bliss.

Although the day was cold for April, Scarlett asked if Tony could roll down the windows. “Sure,” he said. He assumed Scarlett would want it warmer, the way his
Mom always wanted the car warmer than he did.

In fact, Scarlett was cold with the windows down. But Tony’s aftershave was overpowering her nose. Of course, she would never say anything about that. She could tell Tony was nervous enough as it was;
it was obvious he hadn’t dated much, and she thought it might crush him if she mentioned it. Besides, he was so sweet, and she found his lack of self-confidence a refreshing change from the guys she seemed to attract.

The fact was that pretty girls
like her had trouble meeting humble, gentle boys. Guys assumed that good-looking women would only date good-looking men, so the ones with some substance, but whose looks fell short of Ryan Gosling, never approached them. And those who were good-looking tended to be self-absorbed show ponies without two brain cells to rub together. This made for slim pickings.

Tony
believed absolutely in the hot-girls-only-date-hot-boys meme, which is why he couldn’t believe he was sitting next to Scarlett, driving her on a real, honest-to-goodness date. After all, it was common knowledge that guys like him didn’t date girls like this. Guys like him dated girls with glasses and less-than-hourglass figures, girls with “good personalities.” In truth, he didn’t mind; he liked those types of girls, and always thought that would be his “tier.” Scarlett was on another “tier”, about five higher than his. Tony wasn’t sure what would happen when tiers got so mixed up: would the fabric of space/time rip open, creating a black hole that threatened to destroy Earth before the date was over? At the moment, he was willing to chance the destruction of all matter to sit next to her.

Streets were blocked off around downtown Miles Forge for Spring Fling, so Tony parked on a side street. He told Scarlett not to open her door; he jumped out and opened it for her after scooting around. “Your Mom would be pleased,” Max said into his headset. “You opened her car door.” Tony smiled and chuckled.

“What’s funny?” Scarlett asked him.

“You just can’t believe you’re here with her,” Max said in his ear.

“I can’t believe I’m here with you,” Tony said.

Scarlett smiled and took his arm again as they walked.

Tony parked on this particular street because it had his favorite taco stand. He headed toward it.

“OK, Scarlett, we’re here for two reasons. One, I’m starving and I love the tacos from here. A friend of mine owns it. Two, I wanted to show you the phone I was telling you about.”

“Yeah, I haven’t met Max yet,” Scarlett said.

Tony pulled Max out his pocket and handed it to Scarlett. She held the phone, admiring its beautiful simplicity. “It’s amazing!”

Tony beamed. “Max, this is Scarlett.”

“It’s a pleasure to meet you Scarlett,” Max said.

“Um, you too,” Scarlett said, feeling a bit weird.

“Tony’s told me a lot about you. All of it bad.”

Tony
looked embarrassed, but Scarlett laughed. Tony relaxed; he didn’t make jokes like that. That was more like Rick.

“
Well, he hasn’t told me much about you, Max,” Scarlett said. “I guess he wanted it to be a surprise.”

“Is it?” Max asked.

“Oh, yeah. ‘Surprise’ is an understatement.”

“I hope in a good way.”

“No. In a bad way,” Scarlett said, laughing.

“I tell ya, I don’t get no respect,” Max said, in a perfect imitation of Rodney Dangerfield. They
looked at Max, lost. “Sorry. Guess I’ll skew my jokes for a younger audience. I’ll try to be more Conan from now on.”

“
This is so wild,” Scarlett said as they got to Luis’s Taco Palace. “It’s like I’m talking to a person, not a phone.”

“I feel the same way
. You’re much more like a person than a phone, too,” Max said, cracking them up.

Luis Domingo smiled and waved at Tony as they got to the stand.

“Hola, Tony!” Luis said. “What’s up, my man?”

“Hol
a, Luis!” Tony said, shaking his hand vigorously.

“Watch this,” Tony said
to Scarlett. “Max, order both of us chicken tacos, refried beans and large Cokes. In Spanish.”

He held Max up, and the phone ordered the meal, in perfectly-accented Spanish. Luis stared at the phone, mouth open.

“It’s amazing what phones can do these days, amigo!” Luis said. Then he winked at Tony, laughed, and started getting the food.

As Scarlett asked Max some questions, two large men in
sunglasses, jeans and black t-shirts watched from across the street. They’d parked behind Tony a minute after he’d gotten out with Scarlett, then strolled along in the same direction, staying a discreet distance away.

They saw Tony take out the phone,
and heard it ordering in Spanish. One man nodded to the other, as if in confirmation. They made their way toward the taco stand, keeping a leisurely pace.

Scarlett had given Max back to Tony, who put the phone in his pocket since he needed both hands for his food and drink.
Tony chatted with Luis; they’d become friends over the years, and Tony was one of his most loyal customers.

The two men arrived at the stand. “Nice phone, yo,”
the bigger of the two said. Luis looked at them darkly. Scarlett tightened her grip on Tony’s arm.

“Mind if I take a look?”
the man asked, with a smile so fake it could only mean trouble.

Max was still in Tony’s pocket, unable to see the men.

“Max, what should I do?” Tony whispered, his mind a blank slate of fear, as he and Scarlett backed away a bit. Luis moved his stand, which rolled easily on wheels, between the men and the teens.

“Kick his ass!” Max said
, sounding muffled in Tony’s pocket.

Tony took the phone out so Max could see the
muscle-bound men.

“Run like the wind!” Max shouted.

Tony and Scarlett dropped their food and took off in the direction of the festival. As the men started after them, Luis slammed his stand into them, sending them sprawling to the sidewalk. They staggered up, and Luis rammed them again, cackling with glee. “Take that, muchachos!” One of the men pulled out a gun and pointed it at Luis. The vendor immediately backed off, as the men scrambled to their feet and tore after Tony and Scarlett, who by this time had a lead of a block.

“Hold me up so I can see!” Max said as they ran.
It immediately called up a map of the area, homing in on their position through GPS.

“OK, take a left at the alley here.” Tony and Scarlett obeyed without thinking, turning into a dark alley littered with boxes and dumpsters. As they approached the end of the alley, the thugs appeared at the other end, sprinting madly.

“Go right, up here,” Max ordered. Tony and Scarlett turned into the next road, their lungs burning from the exertion. Tony had to slow a bit to stay with Scarlett, who was red-faced from running. Her eyes were wide with terror. The thugs were closing the distance fast.

Max spoke up again. “OK, make a left halfway down. There, just past that door. That little alley’s a shortcut to Pullman Street, and there are big crowds there. You can lose them in a store or something.”

They turned into the next alley, with the thugs no more than 50 feet behind them. Then they despaired. Halfway up the alley sat a barricade with warning signs, totally blocking their way. Just past the barricade, the road was completely torn up and impassible. “Hmm. Didn’t see this. Guess I should update my maps,” Max said without a hint of panic.

They were trapped, and this was the end. Tony and Scarlett stopped and turned.
Tony shoved Scarlett behind him, putting himself between her and the attackers. “Run!” he yelled. “Try to get over that stuff!”

She tried, but it
was impossible. There was nowhere to run, and not enough time even if she found an opening; the thugs were upon them. One grabbed Scarlett roughly by the arm, making her yelp in pain. Tony tried to punch the man, but he just laughed at the feeble attempt and shoved Tony to the ground. Tony got back up and jumped on the man’s back, trying to grab him around his neck. The other goon pulled him off easily; his grip was a like a steel clamp.

“Tony, put your hands
hard over your ears!” Max ordered.

The
thug holding Tony took his hand off to grab the phone. With a burst, Tony yanked his other arm free and jammed his hands over his ears. Instantly, he winced in pain, cried out and staggered like he’d taken a shot to the head in a boxing ring. Some sort of force tried, and mostly failed, to get into his head.

For the others, who hadn’t covered their ears, the effect was
more dramatic. All three -- the two thugs and Scarlett -- cried out and slumped to the ground almost immediately.

Tony watched them fall, with no idea what was going on. He had a ringing in his ears, but he was better than the others, who were out cold. Tony stared
at their unconscious bodies, stunned at the scene. A tiny trickle of blood came from one thug’s ear. Tony blinked a few times and shook his head, trying to get his bearings and clear the ringing deep in his brain.

Max’s voice cut through his confusion. “Quick, grab Scarlett and let’s get out of here. They’ll
all be awake in a few minutes.”