It's Now or Never (10 page)

With nothing left to do in the office that day I picked up my gloves and headed outside to the nurseries. I wasn't a natural horticulturist, but there was always something that needed doing in the department and after a quick word with Tim, the manager of the department, he pointed me in the direction of a pile of compost that had been spilt over by the hebe display.

It was one of the things I loved about the job, the variety. If things ever got too intense in the garden centre or in the office I would come outside, get away from the crowds and find something to do with my hands. The fresh air cleared my head and being close to nature, feeling the soil beneath my fingernails, gave me a different perspective on whatever it was that was troubling me.

I found myself a broom and began sweeping up the earth scattered over the floor, mulling over the fact that I had only two more days to go before I left Browns for good. In some ways I could hardly believe it. It was definitely the end of an era, but hopefully the beginning of a new one too. I was mentally preparing a to-do list when I became aware of someone standing to my side watching as I manoeuvred the broom across the floor.

‘Sorry,' I said, turning around and resting my hands on top of the brush, ‘can I help you at all?'

‘Yes, I hope so.'

‘Oh my god! What are you doing here?'

Alex, who was beginning to make a habit of turning up when I least expected it, was standing in front of me, that familiar seductive wide smile on his lips. He was wearing smart navy chinos, a white shirt unbuttoned at the collar and brown brogues. He didn't look like your average garden centre customer and I was reminded, with a heart-thumping jolt, of just how heart-piercingly, knee-bucklingly good-looking he was.

‘Is that how you speak to all your customers? Or is that tone just reserved for your special ones?'

‘I'm so sorry,' I said, quickly trying to cover up my shock. ‘I didn't mean to be rude, it's just a surprise to see you here.' I ran a hand through my hair and felt a shower of soil fall onto my face. I wiped it away with back of my hand. It had been a long week, I had no make-up on and was wearing my old and unflattering company sweatshirt which did such wonders for my colouring. I realised I must look a complete and utter mess.

An amused expression spread across Alex's face as though he was thinking exactly the same.

I attempted to channel my inner gorgeousness but I suspected it had already packed its bag and left for home.

‘Was there anything in particular you wanted, something I can help you with?'

Perhaps he wanted a new conservatory, a lawnmower or a set of garden gnomes, although to be honest I couldn't really imagine any of those things featuring in Alex's lifestyle.

‘I wanted to see you, Jen. That was all.' His voice was low and caressive. ‘Tom mentioned you worked here and I was just passing so I thought I'd drop in.'

‘Oh…' So my cover as a high-flying retail buyer was blown. General garden centre dogsbody it was. ‘Oh… well, that's great. It's good to see you again.'

‘Is it? Really?' He inclined his head, the corner of his mouth curling in doubt.

He honestly didn't know how good it was to see him. My whole body had gone into overdrive; my heart was pounding in my chest, the hairs on my skin were standing to attention and every nerve ending in my body tingled in anticipation. I was only relieved I had the broom to hang onto. It gave me something to do with my hands and stopped me from falling over which would have been entirely possible the way I was feeling right now.

I nodded.

‘Must admit I was disappointed when you cancelled on me, Jen. I was so looking forward to our date and then when you didn't take my calls… I just wanted to know, did I do something to upset you?'

‘No, nothing like that.' I felt a heat rise to my cheeks. How could I possibly expect Alex to understand the way I felt when I could barely make sense of it myself. I spent every waking moment thinking about him, fantasising about some kind of future together and yet I knew deep down there could never be any future for us both, beyond a few hot and heady nights.

I wanted much more than a man like Alex could ever offer me. As it was I'd spent far too much time obsessing over what he was doing, who he was doing it with or if the owner of the earrings hadn't moved straight back into the warm space I'd left vacated in his double bed.

I wasn't cut out for the uncertainty and thrills and spills that knowing Alex had already brought to my world. Much easier to pack that whole episode away in the box, the very small box called one-night stands, and never have to visit it again.

‘Sorry, I meant to text you back, but I've been busy. I'm leaving here tomorrow so it's been hectic.'

‘Really? Where are you going?'

‘I've got a few different projects in the pipeline. Ultimately I want to set up my own business, but in the meantime I'll be doing some freelance work.'

‘Sounds great.'

We fell silent for a moment, Alex seemingly fascinated by my broom which was making me feel more like Cinderella by the moment, and me by the realisation that here was a man who didn't know how to take a hint. Why was he still here? Why hadn't he moved on to the next conquest on his list? What was it he wanted exactly? Was he so unused to being knocked back that he saw me as a challenge now?

‘Everything okay?'

From out of the shadows Matt had appeared, a warm smile on his face, but his eyes were icy cold.

‘Absolutely fine, thank you,' Alex said. He leant forward, making a show of reading the name off my badge, ‘Jen… here… is giving me advice on some floating plants for my pond.'

I bit back a smile. What I knew about floating plants you could write on the back of a postage stamp. Matt would say I knew even less than that, I suspected.

‘Okay. I'll leave you in the hands of our resident expert then, but if there is anything else you need,' he said, looking at me, ‘then you'll know where to find me.'

I squirmed with embarrassment as my boss wandered away.

‘What are you doing tomorrow after work?'

‘Um…'

‘Good. How about I take you out to dinner to celebrate your last day at work?'

My brain wasn't working fast enough to come up with an appropriate excuse, although I suddenly realised I didn't want to find one. In the flesh, up close and personal, Alex was much more difficult to resist than when he was at the end of the phone. With it being my last day tomorrow I already had that end-of-term feeling and the prospect of going out to dinner with a frankly too-sexy-for-his-own-good art gallery owner was much more appealing than going back to my empty flat.

‘That sounds…'

‘…brilliant.' He didn't even give me the chance to finish my sentence, but I might have opted for the same word in the circumstances. ‘I'll pick you up at seven-thirty pm then. How does that sound?'

He kissed me on my cheek, right there in the middle of the herbaceous perennials, sending a thrill of longing through me that I wouldn't normally have associated with flowerbeds.

It sounded pretty good to me. I looked around, flushed with excitement, wondering if anyone had noticed our public display of affection. I wasn't surprised to see Matt over on the other side of the floor scowling, unable to hide his displeasure. Perhaps it was just as well I was leaving tomorrow after all.

Chapter Eleven

That night, after work, I was on my way round to see Gramps when my mobile buzzed in my pocket. I pulled the car over to a safe spot on the side of the road, before answering the call.

‘Hello sweetie,' breezed Angie's voice down the line. ‘Don't suppose you're free tonight? Seems like ages since we've had a proper chinwag. Fancy some sparkling and a couple of DVDs?'

‘Umm, you're not allowed fizz in your condition, remember?'

‘Sparkling apple for me, but I have some of the proper stuff for you. We could have a cheeky look at some of those dating sites, if you wanted. I could do with a giggle. I like to keep abreast of what's new on the market, even if I'm no longer in a position to buy.'

‘Oh, I'd love to, Angie,' I said, laughing, ‘but I've got a red hot date tonight, so won't be able to make it.'

‘Really? Oh my god! Why didn't you tell me?' Angie's excitement fizzed down the line. ‘Who is he? It's not Alex, is it?'

‘Actually he's a very distinguished older guy. Suave, charming and very eligible.'

‘Squeeeeee.'

I laughed. ‘Oh Ange, don't get too excited, it's only Gramps. I'm surprising him by popping round and cooking dinner. A celebratory meal to mark me leaving Browns tomorrow.'

‘Oh you tease! You honestly had me going there, but aren't you the perfect granddaughter? That's such a lovely thing to do.'

I unclipped my belt and loosened my tensed shoulders into the back of the seat, wondering if I'd imagined a note of wistfulness to Angie's voice.

‘So how's married life?'

‘Just peachy. Well it might be if I got to see my husband occasionally. I'm usually asleep in bed by the time he gets home at night.'

‘Oh, that's tough.'

‘Yeah, I just hope it won't be like this when the baby arrives. I know Tom has to put in the hours for his job, but it would be nice to have a bit more time together. I suppose I'm just feeling a bit deflated after the wedding and honeymoon.'

‘Welcome back to reality, darling! Have you spoken to him about it?'

‘No. I'm trying hard not to appear needy and clingy. He always hated that before. It was one of the things we argued about. I know Tom's career has to come first. It's only now, with the baby on the way, I've realised how hard that is at times.'

‘Yes, but it should be different now, Angie. You're married. Tom must appreciate that both your lives have to change in some way. He has to compromise as well as you.'

She hadn't said as much but I suspected the after work drinking sessions which had always played such a big part in Tom's city career were still very much in evidence.

‘Oh, don't mind me, I'm just having a whinge. I'm feeling fat, spotty and unloved at the moment.'

‘It's only your hormones,' I said, sounding like I knew what I was talking about. ‘But honestly, Ange, you should lay down a few ground rules. Talk to Tom. Get him to agree to a couple of nights a week when he makes an effort to get home at a reasonable time. It isn't a lot to ask for.'

‘Yeah, you're right. Besides, I'm sure everything will fall into place once the baby arrives.'

I was still thinking about my conversation with Angie when I pulled up outside Gramps' bungalow. I had my doubts as to whether married life would change Tom or if he wouldn't just carry on in the same way as he'd always done.

Still, she'd known better than anyone what she was letting herself in for. And she'd told me they'd smoothed all those problems out so I hoped I was just worrying unnecessarily.

I climbed out of the car and retrieved my shopping bags from the boot.

‘Hi Gramps,' I called moments later, letting myself in through the back door. ‘It's only me!'

‘Hello love.' I walked into the kitchen but it wasn't Gramps greeting me, it was Marcia – she was standing at the stove tending to a frying pan that was emitting the most wonderful aroma of rosemary and garlic.

‘Oh,' I said, unable to hid my surprise and disappointment at finding her there.

‘I'm just making your Gramps some liver and bacon, I've got some sauté potatoes in here,' she said shaking her pan, looking like a proper Mary Berry, ‘and some new season asparagus ready to go. It's his favourite meal, but he tells me he hasn't had it in years.'

I looked over at the dining table that had been transformed by a white linen tablecloth with a pretty pink tea-light holder shining softly between the two place settings laid. It looked lovely and Marcia had clearly dressed for the occasion in a floral floaty dress and a pair of strappy sandals.

‘That's nice,' I said, wondering why I hadn't known about the liver and bacon thing.

The dine-in for two ready meal of coq au vin, with chunky chips and garden peas, with a dessert of rich chocolate torte, hung heavy in the plastic carriers I was carrying in my hands. I considered whipping them away and taking them home with me, but eagle-eyed Marcia had already spotted them.

‘So, what have you got there?' she asked me, as Gramps wandered into the kitchen. He was wearing a pair of tan corduroys and a pink and white striped shirt, clothes I'd never seen before. He looked as though he'd just walked out of the pages of a catalogue for the older man. I suspected Marcia might be behind the fashion overhaul too.

‘Hello love.' Gramps hugged me. He even smelled differently these days. Fresh and outdoorsy. ‘This is a lovely surprise,' he said, laughing as he pulled away, ruffling my hair with his hands. ‘To what do we owe this pleasure?'

‘I didn't realise I needed an invitation to visit my own granddad?'

‘Don't be silly. Of course you don't. It's just…'

‘I brought you a couple of bits,' I said, handing over the carrier bags.

Marcia took a peek into the bags over Gramps shoulder.

‘Ooh look, Harry, there's a lovely bottle of wine in there. And a couple of delicious looking desserts too. We could have those after our dinner. How very thoughtful of you, Jennifer.'

‘They're not for you, Marcia,' I said sharply, turning my back on her. ‘I was going to cook for you, Gramps. To celebrate the fact that it's my last day at work tomorrow, but never mind. I can see you've made other plans.'

‘Oh, what a shame. You should have told me and then we could have got something sorted. Why don't you stay and have some dinner with us? I'm sure there's enough to go round.'

‘Of course,' said Marcia, feigning delight, but I wasn't fooled by her skills as an actress. I'm sure her dislike of me was every bit as strong as my dislike for her.