Ivy and Bean Bound to Be Bad (4 page)

BOOK: Ivy and Bean Bound to Be Bad
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“Arms and legs lying around?” asked Bean. Gross. But interesting.

“Yeah,” said Ivy. “He was a really bad wolf until he met that good guy.”

Bean pictured herself patting the wolf’s shaggy head. He was trotting alongside her with his wolf claws clicking on the sidewalk. Grateful townspeople waved. “I bet the people were pretty glad not to be eaten, too,” she said.

“Hey,” said Ivy. She was smiling—a real smile, not a thinking-nice-thoughts smile. “What if we did something like that?”

“What? Put fake arms and legs around?” Bean asked.

“Not that,” said Ivy. “I mean turning evil to good. If we turned a bad person into a good
person, it would be almost like getting a wolf to stop eating people.”

“Yeah,” said Bean. “That would mean we were so good that we could infect other people with our goodness.” She could almost feel the goodness oozing out of her. “That’s a great idea. Who should we gooden up? Nancy?”

“No,” said Ivy firmly. “Crummy Matt.”

Bean stared at Ivy. “Are you bonkers? He’s going to squash us like bugs.” Crummy Matt was ten years old. He
bragged that when he was three, his mother had taken him to the doctor because she was worried he was a giant. The doctor said that Crummy Matt wasn’t a giant. He was just big. Crummy Matt said he was the biggest ten-year-old in the country. He said there was a bigger ten-year-old in China, and that was the only reason why he wasn’t the biggest ten-year-old in the world.

“No, he won’t,” Ivy said,“because we’re going to change him into a good person.”

“How are we going to do that?”

Ivy looked around as if she would find the answer in the grass. “I don’t know,” she said after a moment. “Maybe just looking at us will make him nice. That’s what happened with the wolf.”

Neither of them moved.

“We probably need a snack first,” said Ivy.

They each had some banana chips. Then Bean needed some milk. She spilled quite a lot of it. They wiped it up. Then Ivy had to go to the bathroom. Then Bean had to.

When Bean came out of the bathroom, Ivy was smiling her pure-thoughts smile. “Come on,” she said through her smiling teeth. “Let’s get going.”

Bean nodded. They walked toward the living room. Ivy’s mom was lying on the couch with cucumbers all over her face. By now Bean
was so good she didn’t even laugh.

“Bye, Mom,” said Ivy. “I love you.”

Ivy’s mom lifted her head a little. A cucumber fell on the floor. “What?”

“I love you.”

“Where are you going? It sounds like you’re leaving forever,” said Ivy’s mom. More cucumbers fell off her face.

“We’re going over to Matt’s,” said Ivy.

“You are? I thought you didn’t like him,” said Ivy’s mom.

“Sure I like him,” said Ivy. “I love everybody.”

“You do?” Ivy’s mom sounded surprised.

“Yes I do,” said Ivy.

“It’s no good saying it inside,” Bean pointed out. “The birds can’t hear you.”

“Birds?” said Ivy’s mom. “What birds?”

“We might have a bunch of birds coming to visit,” explained Ivy.

“And something else, too,” said Bean. “Something with lots of teeth. But don’t worry.”

Ivy’s mom looked from Bean to Ivy. “Worry? Me? Never.” She picked up her cucumbers and put them back on her face.

A GOOD BAD IDEA

As it turned out, Ivy and Bean didn’t have to go to Crummy Matt’s house because Crummy Matt was already out on the sidewalk, surrounded by kids. There was his little brother, Dino, who was eight. There were Sophie W. and Sophie S. and Liana, who was Katy’s older sister. Katy was sitting on a paper bag on Sophie S.’s lawn. And there was Crummy Matt’s rat, Blister. Poor Blister. He wasn’t very old, but he was tired anyway. He was tired because Crummy Matt was always making him do tricks.

Ivy and Bean walked toward the group. When they got closer, they heard Liana say, “Matt, that’s really mean! Put him down.”

“He likes it,” Crummy Matt said.

“No, he doesn’t,” said Dino. “He hates it.”

“Shut up,” said Crummy Matt. “You don’t know.” He held Blister by the tail, dangling him over the sidewalk. Blister twisted and squeaked. He hated it.

“Boy, is he
crummy
,” said Bean softly.

But Ivy was already speeding down the sidewalk. “Matt!” she cried, “Matt! Don’t be cruel! Put the poor thing down!”

Crummy Matt looked up, surprised. Ivy had never talked to him before. “What?” He swung Blister a little.

Ivy clasped her hands together. “Matt, I beg you! Put him down! You’re harming an innocent creature!”

The Sophies, Liana, and Katy looked hopeful. Even Blister looked hopeful. Dino didn’t.

“Nobody asked for your stupid opinion,” said Crummy Matt, “so shut up.”

Ivy and Bean glanced at each other. It didn’t seem like Ivy’s goodness was doing much to Crummy Matt. In fact, it seemed like Ivy’s goodness was making him mad. Bean thought maybe it was time to leave.

But Ivy took a breath. “Matt, you’re a really horrible person, but you could change. If you put Blister down, I’ll be your friend forever.”

Bean got ready to run.

Crummy Matt carefully put Blister in his shirt pocket.

Ivy smiled purely.

Crummy Matt reached out and pulled Ivy’s sparkly headband off her hair. “Who says I want to be your friend?” he said and threw the headband into the street. Then he turned around and went into his house.

Ivy was thinking loving things about all living creatures, even disgusting creatures like eyeless sea worms. Then a hummingbird whizzed past her head. It was beautiful.

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