Jacob Two-Two on the High Seas (5 page)

“The lower deck! My arms are tired,” moaned Cindy.

“No complaining now. Real sailors don’t whine. Pick up your buckets and mops and follow me.” Mr. Scrounger took them down to the lower deck and left them to swab once more.

“I’m so tired,” Cindy said. “I don’t know how we
can do this deck too.” Just then a door opened slowly. Jacob and Cindy stopped to see who it was.

“Morgenbesser!” Jacob cried. The enormous man smiled. He was so tall, he had to lean over so his head wouldn’t bang the top of the doorway.

“I heard about you two swabbing the decks. That’s not easy work for people your size. So I thought I’d give you a hand.” And before Jacob and Cindy could even say “Thank you,” Morgenbesser went to work. He picked up one mop in each hand, dunked them into the buckets, and began to swab at twice the speed as they did. In a jiffy, he was done.

“That was amazing,” Cindy said.

“Now I better get back to the engine room before Mr. Scrounger sees me. I don’t want to lose my job. See you later!” He put down the mops and squeezed back through the door. Jacob and Cindy looked at each other and grinned.

“Hurray for Morgenbesser! Hurray for Morgenbesser!” Jacob chanted. Then the door opened, and out came Mr. Scrounger with a scowl on his face.

“What, standing about when you’re supposed to be working? This won’t do at all.”

“But we’ve finished, we’ve finished,” Jacob said.

“Impossible. Let me see … but you have! Well, you two are even better sailors than I thought. In that case, I better give you another job.”

“Another?” Cindy moaned.

“That’s right. How about the two of you clean my cabin. It’s an awful mess and Captain Sparkle-tooth is doing an inspection today. He loves doing inspections – it’s what he does best. I’m sure the two of you can get my cabin in shipshape. Come along then, there’s no time to waste!”

Just about the last thing that Jacob wanted to do was clean Mr. Scrounger’s room, but he and Cindy followed behind. Mr. Scrounger opened his door and said “Get to it now, and no lollygagging.”

“He certainly is right about it being a mess,” said Cindy, when they were alone. “Even my room never gets this bad.” There were dirty coffee cups everywhere, the garbage can was overflowing with candy wrappers, and newspapers were strewn all over the floor. Green and yellow feathers from the parrot floated everywhere.

“Hello, Polly. Hello,” said Jacob.

“
Apple sauce in your underpants! Apple sauce in your underpants
,” said the parrot, perched on a wooden stand.

The two of them got to work. Cindy threw things into a big garbage bag, while Jacob piled up copies of
Shipwreck Monthly
. Every so often, the parrot would talk to them. “
Clean your ears!
” it would say. “
Big feet are good for dancing!
”

“Hey, Jacob, look at this,” Cindy said. She came over and showed Jacob what she was holding. It was a black eye patch. “Why would Mr. Scrounger have that?” she wondered aloud. “There’s nothing wrong with his eye.”

“Maybe it’s for a costume party,” said Jacob.

“Does Mr. Scrounger look like the sort of person who goes to costume parties?”

“No, he doesn’t. No, he doesn’t.”

“I think we better talk to Morgenbesser.”

Jacob agreed that it was a good idea. The two friends rushed to finish their cleaning. Then they left Mr. Scrounger’s cabin and hurried down to the engine room. The metal door was so heavy, it took the two of them to pull it open. There was Morgenbesser shoveling coal into the furnace, his muscles straining. He looked just as enormous as the first time Jacob had seen him, but Jacob wasn’t afraid of him anymore.

When Morgenbesser saw them, he smiled and put down his shovel. “Hello, Jacob. Hello, Cindy. I was just going to take a break for tea. Would you like to join me?”

Cindy curtsied. “Why, I’d love to,” she said.

“Me too, me too,” Jacob added.

Morgenbesser already had the kettle on the furnace, and it started to whistle. He made the tea and took a baking pan from atop the furnace. Jacob could smell the freshly baked cookies. Morgenbesser set the teacups and a plate of cookies on his checkers table, and the three of them sat on the barrels.

“Oh good, the cookies didn’t burn this time,” Morgen besser said. “Do have some. I hope Mr. Scrounger hasn’t put you to work again.”

“He has, he has,” Jacob said. “We found something while cleaning his room.”

“What did you find?” Morgenbesser asked, placing a whole cookie in his mouth.

“A black eye patch,” Cindy said.

Morgenbesser chewed thoughtfully. “First a parrot and now an eye patch. So who wears an eye patch and goes around with a parrot?”

“I know! I know!” Jacob said. “A pirate does! A pirate does!”

“Exactly. But what would the first mate be doing with these things? The last person you want to meet while sailing on the high seas is a pirate. You two have done good work. We better be extra careful.”

“These are lovely cookies,” said Cindy. Jacob could see that she really did have awfully good manners.

CHAPTER 9

acob Two-Two and Cindy went up to the deck. Jacob said, “Will you show me your treasure now, will you?”

“Yes, I will,” Cindy said. “But you must remember not to tell anyone.”

“I won’t, I won’t.”

“It’s right here in my pocket.”

But before Cindy could show Jacob, someone began calling to them. “Jacob Two-Two! Cindy!
Yoo-hoo
!” It was Captain Sparkletooth. He was waving to them from beside the wheelhouse. “This is a perfect time for both of you to have your photograph
taken with me. I’m sure you’ll agree that I look particularly handsome today.”

Near him was Mr. Scrounger with a camera on a tripod. Jacob had no desire to be photographed with Captain Sparkletooth. But he didn’t want to hurt the captain’s feelings, so he and Cindy went over. A heavy mist hung over the ocean. It was so thick that Jacob could hardly see five feet beyond the rail of the ship.

“You first, Jacob Two-Two,” said the captain. “Don’t be shy now. Move a little closer. Now when you get this photograph, Jacob, don’t be surprised if you look pale and insignificant next to my magnificent self. Everyone does. Have you got all of me in focus, Mr. Scrounger? Not just my nose like last time.”

“Almost,” said Mr. Scrounger.

“What’s that out there?” Cindy pointed past the rail of the ship. “There’s something there in the mist.”

“Don’t move or you’ll spoil the shot,” said Mr. Scrounger. But Jacob turned his head to look. Cindy was right, there was something out there. A dark form slowly emerged from the mist.

“Why, this is most annoying,” Captain Sparkletooth said. “This was going to be one of the best photographs of me ever. I don’t see what can be so interesting out there.”

Jacob could just make out the carved figurehead of a mermaid. “It’s a ship! It’s a ship!” he cried. As it became more visible, Jacob could see that it was a very old ship, the kind with three tall masts and big sails. He could also see cannons – dozens of them – lined up along the ship’s side.

“If anyone is going to greet the captain of another ship, that person ought to be me,” Captain Sparkle-tooth said. “In fact, I have a speech prepared for just such an occasion. Mr. Scrounger, where is my bullhorn? Ah, here it is on this hook.” The captain put the bullhorn to his mouth. “This is the captain of the SS
Spring-a-Leak
calling. I welcome you to … to … wherever we are. In recognition of the brotherhood of all sailors, we offer our hospitality to you all. I believe we have muffins and hot chocolate.”

Now Jacob could see the flag waving from the top of one of the masts. It was a black flag, with a skull and crossbones on it – the Jolly Roger! “It’s a pirate ship. It’s a pirate ship!” Jacob said.

“Nonsense, Jacob,” said Captain Sparkletooth. “There haven’t been pirates in these waters for two hundred years. Do you think I’d be out here if there were? There must be some other reason. I know!
They’re making a movie. I hear that pirate movies are very popular these days. Perhaps the stars would like to have their picture taken with me… .”

The captain’s words were drowned out by an explosion.
Bazoom!
Something whizzed over their heads and splashed into the water on the other side of the SS
Spring-a-Leak
.

“It’s a cannonball!” Jacob cried. “They’re firing at us! They’re firing!”

“Firing?” said Captain Sparkletooth. “I’m shocked. How rude. There is only one thing for a brave and handsome captain such as myself to do. Surrender! Somebody wave a white flag. We don’t have one? How inconvenient. Here, I’ll wave my jacket.”

But by the time the captain had undone all the brass buttons, the pirate ship was already alongside the SS
Spring-a-Leak
. A gangplank was laid across the rails, and two very dirty pirates in bare feet stepped nimbly across, holding out their swords. “Prepare to meet the greatest pirate of them all!” one of them announced. “Introducing our leader, Crossbones!”

Crossbones?
Jacob shivered at the very sound of the name. Out of the mist emerged a man in a pirate hat and leather boots. As the pirate crossed over the gangway, Jacob saw his eye patch, his grizzled beard, and the cutlass tucked in his broad belt. He swaggered as he walked, his big stomach swaying with each step. With a grunt he began to pull himself over the rail of the SS
Spring-a-Leak
. There was a loud ripping sound.

“Tarnation!” growled Crossbones. “I believe I have rendered a tear in my lower garment.”

“What did he just say?” asked Captain Sparkle-tooth.

“He ripped his pants,” said one of the other pirates.

Crossbones stepped up to the Captain and leaned on his sword. Captain Sparkletooth, his teeth chattering with fear, removed his cap. “Oh, dear, Mr. Crossbones, you have quite a reputation. A terrible reputation.”

“You flatter me. I believe I am even blushing,” said Crossbones. “You have done well to surrender, Captain Sparkletooth. Otherwise, I would have had to mar, soil, besmear – in other words, stain – that scrumptious uniform of yours. With blood, I mean.”

“I don’t like the sight of blood, especially my own,” said Captain Sparkletooth. “But if I might ask a question, why are you here?”

“
Aargh
! That’s the question, ain’t it, boys?”

“Aye,” agreed the other pirates, grinning so that their black teeth showed. “A good question, ha-ha!”

“Aye, I’ll answer it, too. But first, pirates, bar those doors to the lower decks. I hear people coming up the stairs.” The pirates did as they were told. Jacob could hear the voices of other passengers, including his own parents. “I’ll tell you why we’re here,” Crossbones went on. “We’ve come for the swag, the snatch, the booty – in other words, the treasure.”

“Yes, the treasure, the treasure!” sang the pirates.

“I don’t know of any treasure aboard the SS
Spring-a-Leak
. Why do you think there’s treasure here?”

“Because I have a spy on your ship.”

“A spy aboard the SS
Spring-a-Leak?
Outrageous. When I find out who the spy is, I’m going to take away his dessert for a week. Make that two weeks. Mr. Scrounger, do you know who the spy is?”