Jane Austen Stole My Boyfriend (14 page)

BOOK: Jane Austen Stole My Boyfriend
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I don’t think I will ever forget the Octagon Room. The eight slanting walls of primrose yellow, the four double doors, the four marble fireplaces and the sixteen paned windows above
them.

And Thomas, very formally holding my hand in his, bowing to me.

But his hand, even through our gloves, burned through to mine, and his fingers pressed my fingers so tightly . . .

And his eyes when he raised his head . . .

Suddenly all the noise faded and it seemed as though we were alone . . .

Looking at each other . . .

‘I’ll be back,’ he said softly.

‘If only Thomas’s uncle and sister liked me and Edward-John gave permission for the marriage, then I would be just so happy,’ I remarked to Jane as we were
getting ready for breakfast.

‘Well, at least you have found the man of your dreams,’ pointed out Jane. She sighed theatrically, saying, ‘
Hélas
,’ in just the same way as Eliza does.

‘Jane,’ I said, diverted from my own troubles, ‘don’t be ridiculous. You have the whole of Bath paying court to you. You just have to choose. Who exactly do you like
best, Newton Wallop, Captain Forster, Lieutenant Carter, Lieutenant Denny, Lieutenant Brandon or any of the other men who have been queuing up to dance with you?’

Jane sighed again. ‘I need some advice, I think. My love life is getting too complicated for a simple country girl like myself.’

And then the bell rang for breakfast and we raced down, giggling as usual.

We have just finished our dinner, and Jane and I have come up to our bedroom for a little rest. We are all going to a concert in the Lower Rooms in the evening. My uncle thinks
that Thomas will be unlikely to be back from Bristol today, so I shall have to wait for tomorrow morning to see him. He has promised to take me to call on his sister Elinor after church so that
will probably be the time.

Jane has just lifted her head from her paper to ask me whether I have written about our new gowns yet so I must do that now.

This morning at breakfast time our uncle asked us if we had enjoyed the evening. We were both so enthusiastic that he beamed at us, and even Mrs Leigh-Perrot gave a smile.

‘They were both looking very pretty, I thought,’ she said to Mrs Austen. ‘Those white muslins are so fresh. Just right for girls of that age.’

‘And what are you going to wear at the ball next Saturday?’ asked Mr Leigh-Perrot.

Jane and I looked at each other. Another ball in seven days’ time!

‘The same,’ I said after a minute.

‘Oh no, you can’t do that.’ Mr Leigh-Perrot was as aghast as if he were a leader of fashion.

‘We’ve only got one ball dress each,’ said Jane, ignoring her mother’s frown. ‘Our old ones were falling apart.’

Mr Leigh-Perrot looked at his wife. ‘What do you think, my dear? Shall we make the girls a present of a new gown each? Do you think that your dressmaker could make them in time?’

‘I’m sure that she could.’ Mrs Leigh-Perrot was also in a good humour. ‘You can get up-to-date fashions here in Bath, as fine as London. No, no, Mrs Austen. Your brother
and I would love to do this. Now, girls, as soon as you finish your breakfast, go upstairs and put your bonnets on. We’ll take Franklin with us to carry the parcels,’ she added to her
husband, and he nodded benignly.

Jane and I were first down. Franklin was already waiting for us, standing outside by the railing, wearing a top hat and a pair of white gloves.

‘Franklin,’ asked Jane as soon as we reached him, ‘have you got a wife?’

‘Not me, Miss Jane,’ said Franklin. He had a very dignified air when he answered the question and I felt embarrassed that he had been asked.

I think Jane was a bit embarrassed too because she thought for a few moments before speaking again – and that is not like her.

‘I just asked because I wondered if you could give me advice on choosing a husband.’

Franklin laughed at that for a long time. I liked the way that he did it. He just threw his head back and roared quite loudly. I saw a few passers-by look at him with surprise.

‘Don’t you worry your head about that, Miss Jane,’ he said when he had recovered. ‘Your father and mother will do the choosing, and they will choose someone just right
for you.’

Jane made a face. When the two ladies came out Franklin walked in front of them, and Jane, taking my arm, fell back a little.

As we were walking along the west side of Queen’s Square I heard a bright squeaky voice saying, ‘Come along, Eliza, let’s go for a brisk walk. That’s what we need after
being cooped up in those stuffy old Assembly Rooms yesterday evening. Walk quickly, dear. You’ll be glad that I got you out of bed at a reasonable hour.’

‘It’s Eliza,’ I said quickly.

‘And Phylly,’ groaned Jane.

Queen’s Square had a garden in the centre of the four lines of houses. There were some tall bushes on the side we were walking, but in a moment Phylly emerged, strutting along quickly and
followed by a very sleepy-looking Eliza.

Mrs Austen grinned at the sight. ‘You’re up early, Eliza,’ she said.


Chère Madame
, I don’t think I ever got up as early as this since I was a child,’ said Eliza earnestly, doing her best to smother a yawn. ‘That is unless I
hadn’t gone to bed the night before,’ she added.

‘Uncle and Aunt are going to buy Jenny and myself new gowns! Do come with us, Eliza, and help us to choose,’ said Jane enthusiastically. She dropped back and allowed the
Leigh-Perrots and Mrs Austen to get ahead of us. She turned eagerly to Eliza, but Phylly pushed her way between them.

‘Dear, dear, Jane,’ said Phylly, ‘may I give you a word of advice?’ She stood on her toes and whispered loudly into Jane’s ear. ‘I’m just a little
worried about you. You should not get too interested in balls at your age. You are getting quite a name as a flirt. A little bird told me last night that you set out to steal young men from other
girls, and that is not nice at all. There’s another thing too, Jane dear, if you will forgive me mentioning it. I think you are trying to turn the head of that nice young man Harry Digweed.
I’m sure that he is too sensible to take very much notice of you, but you have to be careful about your reputation, you know.’

Then she stood back from Jane and nodded sternly. Jane stared at her in wide-eyed innocence and Eliza looked from one to the other in an embarrassed fashion and then took matters into her own
hands by decisively changing the subject.

‘What style of gown will you have?’ Eliza took my arm and Jane’s and teetered along on her very high heels between us.

Jane told her that we weren’t sure, and Eliza immediately began discussing the latest fashion, still walking fast and doing her best to catch up with the other three. She didn’t look
too upset when Phylly, from behind us, said disdainfully, ‘Well, I am going to continue my morning constitutional. I’ve made a resolution to go ten times around the square’s
garden every morning. Otherwise my health will suffer in this stuffy city.’

‘How strong you are, Phylly dear,’ said Eliza admiringly over her shoulder, but to our relief she made no effort to persuade her cousin to accompany us.

‘I’d like to have something in the latest fashion from Paris,’ said Jane with determination. ‘Something which would make a lord with ten thousand pounds a year
immediately seek my hand in marriage.’

‘Jane,’ I said reproachfully. I felt sorry for Harry, who was so devoted. Even Phylly had noticed that. Harry wouldn’t care what Jane wore.

‘What about the latest idea of having an underskirt, a train and an overskirt each of a different colour?’ suggested Eliza. She released both our arms and stood in the middle of the
pavement making wide gestures with her hands over her own body, outlining a loose style gathered in under the bosom, flowing out to a train behind and then outlining a sharply pointed V-shape in
the front. I could see immediately what she meant. Something like this:

We were now in the middle of Milsom Street and a small crowd of interested shoppers began to gather around to listen to Eliza’s mixture of French and English. She was so fashionably
dressed herself that most people had a look of earnest attention that made me shoot a glance at Jane, and I could see that she, like me, was having a hard time stopping a giggle escaping. Mrs
Leigh-Perrot had an air of annoyance, but Mrs Austen just wore the usual look of amused tolerance that she reserved for her husband’s eccentric niece.


Voyons
,’ concluded Eliza. ‘Let us go in. This is the shop,
n’est-ce pas
?’

The drapery shop was built like a small version of a church, with pillars dividing the space into lanes. Very cleverly each pillar was encircled with a band bearing five or six large hooks which
were used to drape long swathes of muslin or silk in assorted colours. In between the pillars and set against the walls were numerous tall cheval looking glasses and the colours were reflected in
them. While Mrs Leigh-Perrot had a friendly conversation with the owner, Jane and I wandered up and down the aisles, gazing at the beautiful fabrics.

‘Muslin or silk?’ Eliza joined us.

I quickly told her muslin. Silk would be very expensive, and I did not want to take advantage of the Leigh-Perrots’ generosity. In any case, silk was difficult to clean, whereas muslin
could be washed again and again. Jane had been admiring a glossy gold-colour silk, but she nodded reluctantly when I explained the advantages of muslin to Eliza. By the time Mrs Leigh-Perrot joined
us we had both decided on muslin.

‘Much more suitable for young girls,’ said Mrs Austen decidedly, and I could see that she was pleased with our decision.

‘I think I’d like this one, but what would I have for the underskirt?’ Jane was examining a pale yellow.

‘Too pale for you,
chérie
.’ Eliza was always very definite about these things. She moved with quick, almost dancing steps between the draped pillars. Jane and I
followed her obediently.

‘. . . too much liberty given to children nowadays. They are asked what they want, rather than told what to do. When I was five years old I was put on a ship without a mother or father or
any relation and I was sent all the way from Barbados to England and put in a boarding school. I didn’t see my family for another ten years. Didn’t do me any harm.’

Mrs Leigh-Perrot was carrying on this conversation with Mrs Austen now as the shop owner hovered around us. I wondered if she thought we were getting our own way too much in being allowed to
choose the stuff for our gowns. Hurriedly I moved away, leaving Jane and Eliza staring at some yellow muslins, and walked down the long aisle trying to make my mind up. The trouble was that every
one of the muslins was so beautiful. I thought about the Duchess of Devonshire, whom we had seen playing cards at the Assembly Rooms. If I were her I would spend fifty thousand pounds on muslins
rather than waste it at the card table.

‘What about this?’ Jane was eying a rich yellow. I came back and joined them. It was easier to choose for Jane than for myself.


Parfait!
‘ enthused Eliza, picking up the end of the muslin and holding it against Jane, glancing quickly from Jane’s deep brown hair and dark hazel eyes and then back
at the material.

‘I rather like it,’ said Jane. ‘It’s the colour of daffodils. My favourite flower.’ She lowered her voice and whispered wickedly to me, ‘And Harry’s
favourite – don’t forget that.’

Suddenly I made up my mind. Jane’s remark about the daffodil had given me an idea.

‘What about a bluebell colour for me?’ I asked Eliza, and she nodded enthusiastically. While Jane dithered between two different shades of pale yellow for the train and the V-shaped
panel in the front of the gown, I walked along scanning all the blues. But funnily enough it was Mrs Austen who, getting tired of Mrs Leigh-Perrot’s reminiscences of her childhood and the
shock of an English boarding school after the warmth and fun of Barbados (she had probably heard them all hundreds of times), called me over to a dark corner.

‘Look, Jenny,’ she said.

This pillar was draped in nothing but soft shades of blue. The shop owner was down in a minute. ‘You’ll need some light to see them properly, madam. Abigail, bring a lamp.’

BOOK: Jane Austen Stole My Boyfriend
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