Killing Me Softly (13 page)

Melissa’s face softened into a loving smile as she looked ahead at her husband. ‘When I first heard about it I thought he had to be seeking publicity, but they never wanted their work mentioned in press releases. Then Phil asked me to come with him one day and I did. I think I fell in love with him right there. He did get something out of it but not what I had thought. It brightened his day to see those elderly and sick people smile. When they clapped and sang along . . . I swear there were tears in his eyes, such joy.’

Melissa sighed softly then looked away, her voice becoming less dreamy, more serious. ‘Daemon’s had a rockier road than the rest. His rough edges are a kind of protective armour. He thinks nobody sees the real him, but we do. There is nothing the band wouldn’t do for him. He’s always been there through thick and thin for them, even when life was completely screwed up for him. It’s no coincidence he chooses to work with underprivileged children.’ Her voice warmed. ‘He is one of the most generous and loyal people I have ever met. Give him a chance to show you.’

Alexia frowned. She didn’t like the way this conversation was going. ‘You’re wrong. There are no feelings between us. There’s no reason for me to give him a chance.’

‘Isn’t there?’ Melissa looked deeply into Alexia’s eyes. A smug smile tugged at the corner of her mouth. Before Alexia could respond, Melissa kicked her horse into a canter and caught up with Phil just as he reached the stable doors.

Alexia looked back up at the window but Daemon had gone.

She knew Melissa was right. Some kind of attraction, like a magnetic force, quivered between them. For reasons she couldn’t share with him or anyone else, Alexia knew no matter how that force drew them together, she couldn’t give in. One way or another she’d lost nearly everyone she’d ever loved and it was just too bloody painful. She wouldn’t voluntarily put herself through that again.

If Daemon had feelings for her he would have to get over them. There were too many reasons why they couldn’t make a go of things. After all, her life was here and his was . . . Well, his life had to play out elsewhere. He loved the spotlight. She had reasons to abhor it. Besides, she had responsibilities that would not go away. Most of all, she had Cat. She could never leave her again. She wouldn’t. She couldn’t.

Not even if it meant giving up on love?

Alexia kicked Viking forward into the stable yard. That was only loneliness talking. She couldn’t let it in. If she did she might give in to the urges stirring inside her. Urges that had arrived with Daemon.

They weren’t even involved and he was ruining things. Perhaps he was right. They did need to talk. They would talk and she would lay down the rules. She needed the rules. Without them, there would be chaos.

Her resolve stayed with her through lunch but the minute she saw him in the studio, she remembered the song and the way he had made her feel in that intimate moment between them. She could almost feel his breath on her face once again, the touch of his hand on her skin and the urgency of his lips on hers. She stole a glance at him. His intense blue eyes found hers, understanding, anger and passion in their depths. Feeling her skin heat, she turned away. Confused and flustered, Alexia busied herself with a sound check. She couldn’t talk to him now. Or later. Avoiding him was the better option.

Despite her internal turmoil, the session went well. They got two more tracks laid down. There would be too many tracks for the CD but that was okay. Alexia would do individual recordings of instruments and vocals, laying the tracks one over the other to create a full sound where required. Orchestrations would be decided upon, harmonies and lyrics cleaned up, backup singers added. For now, they were getting the rudimentary tracks down. The hard part, the development of the album as a whole, the culling of tracks, would come later. In the past week they had laid ten down with double that to go.

Daemon watched Alexia move around in the booth, a little frown of concentration furrowing her brow as she listened back to something in the cans.

She wasn’t like any producer they had worked with before. Not only did she manage the music, she managed the band. She seemed to be tuned in to each one of them, knowing when they needed a break or encouragement, when they needed to be pushed to get the best result. Normally they wouldn’t have the breaks she insisted on for lunch and dinner but would work through and order in. Late nights and bad takeaway did not a happy atmosphere make. This was . . . better.

Daemon had to admit that Alexia was the driving force behind making this a positive and different experience for all. She was impressive, even more so now that he knew about her past.

The band’s chatter as they packed up for the day drifted around him. Lis had wandered in to join them, her hand slipping in to Phil’s back pocket as his arm went around his shoulder.

Daemon smiled, so happy for his friend that he’d found that kind of love.

His gaze flickered back to Alexia. Mesmerised, he watched the way her hands flew so confidently over the desk. She kept looking at the computer monitor, the headphones now slung around her neck. Her frown had deepened. He wondered if she knew she bit her bottom lip when she was concentrating. Every now and then she would nod slightly. Daemon found himself smiling.

The smile ended abruptly when Craig smacked him on the back of the head. ‘Get a grip, mate. I thought you were going to keep away.’

Daemon turned away. ‘Piss off, Craig.’ He wanted to be annoyed, but couldn’t keep the smile off his face.

Craig sighed, glancing at Alexia. ‘Personally I think it would be great if you two hooked up, but I just don’t see it happening. Ever since . . . ’ He stopped, rubbed his hand over his mouth and shrugged. ‘You’ve both got a lot of baggage. I don’t want to see either of you hurt.’

Daemon nodded. He knew exactly what Craig had been about to say and instead of making him want to run in the other direction, Lexi’s past made him want to stay. Although admiration was a great part of what he felt, it had only fuelled the flames of the desire that were already there. She was a survivor. Like him. They were a pair. They could understand each other in a way no-one else ever could. If only they could get past the barriers they’d both built. ‘Difficult’ didn’t begin to describe the problems ahead, but knowing about her past would help. Knowing her past had drawn the final link between them. He had needed that last link; it let him acknowledge what he’d been denying. What he felt was more than attraction. He just had to find some way of making her trust him so they could explore it.

But for now he had to get Craig off his back. ‘It’s nice to know you care, mate, but you need to butt out. If I decide to do something about this, it’s my problem not yours.’

Craig’s brow rose. ‘It will be my problem if it doesn’t work out.’

Daemon smiled sardonically. ‘If it comes to that, you could always go on holiday for a few months.’

Craig chuckled. ‘Thanks. Maybe this time I will.’

Daemon frowned. ‘You make it sound like it’s doomed.’

Craig shrugged. ‘It is what it is. I really hope you can make things work. If that’s what you want. Just don’t be surprised if it’s harder than you think.’

Daemon kept his expression even. He knew what Craig would say if he found out he’d had Nigel check into Alexia’s past. There would be fireworks.

‘Hey Craig, are you coming to the dance tonight?’

Daemon blew out his breath, not realising he’d been holding it as Craig turned to answer Phil.

‘I don’t know. I was thinking about it. Why?’

‘Melissa and I thought it might be fun.’

‘What dance?’ Daemon asked.

Phil grabbed his jacket and slung it over his shoulders. The nights were getting warmer but they were still cool, and all of them felt the chill after being in the studio for hours. ‘The local dance. Bev said they run them once a month in the church hall. There’s a live band and caller, the ladies’ auxiliary provides food and the local serves drinks. Bev and Karl always go. Lis has never been to one, so we thought we’d go.’

‘Count me in.’

Phil turned as Alexia walked into the room. ‘Have you ever been to the local dance, AJ?’

Alexia smiled at him. He and Melissa always called her AJ so they wouldn’t slip up when they were out in public.

She shook her head. ‘No, I haven’t. Bev and Karl always go. Ask them about it.’

‘We have. They sold us on it so we’re all going to go tonight.’

‘Really?’ she asked, her eyes sliding to Daemon in surprise. ‘All of you?’

‘Why do you sound so surprised?’ he asked.

She shrugged. ‘I just didn’t think it would be your thing.’

‘Are you kidding?’ Craig butted in. ‘Daemon was
the
Michael Flatley of his local village back in Ireland. He took me to a few of them and they were wild. I couldn’t keep up with him.’

‘Really? Sounds like fun. I hope you enjoy yourself.’

Daemon took a step forward. ‘You’re not coming? Afraid you won’t be able to keep up?’ he teased.

She cocked her head, a faint smile on her lips. ‘Not at all. I’ll have you know I was quite the dancer when I was younger.’

‘I bet you were, but the question is, are you still?’

His eyes never left hers. She felt the challenge and shied away from it. ‘I’ve got to stay here with Cat.’

‘I think you’re chicken. Afraid I’ll give you a run for your money?’

‘I am not. It’s you who won’t be able to keep up.’

‘So you’re coming, then?’ he crowed. ‘Pick you up at seven.’

He turned to go but she grabbed his arm to stop him, then let go as if stung. ‘I didn’t say I was going.’

‘Buck, buck, buck, buck, buck.’

‘I am not chicken. But I can’t expect Billy to give up his nights as well, and someone has to stay with Cat.’

‘What if she came? It would probably be good for her to see all the people dancing and having fun.’ Craig butted in, ignoring the look she shot him. ‘I’ll just go ask Billy. I’m sure he’ll be all for it.’ He left so quickly Alexia didn’t have a chance to stop him.

She turned back to face Daemon. He was standing, arms crossed, looking self-assured and cocky, knowing he had backed her into a corner with the help of Craig – she would have words with him later – and she couldn’t say no.

‘So?’

‘So, what?’

His grin widened. ‘Are you going to come with me tonight?’

‘If Billy is okay with bringing Cat, then I suppose . . . ’ She looked at Phil and Melissa for help, but Phil just smiled shyly at her and Melissa mouthed, ‘I told you.’

Alexia glared at her and then turned back to Daemon. ‘I’ll go with you . . . With all of you.’

He nodded, raising an eyebrow and infuriating her further with his cockiness, mostly because she found him charming. ‘Great. I’ll come by the main house at seven.’ He turned and left her standing there dumbfounded.

What had just happened? One moment she had been looking forward to a quiet night in with her sister and the next she’d been challenged and bullied into going out with Daemon. She shook her head. No, out with the band.

Be truthful with yourself at least,
she admonished herself.
You’re going with Daemon tonight.
Trying to ignore him and avoid him had been a waste of time. She had just agreed to go out on a kind of date with him. Okay, they wouldn’t be alone once they were there, but there was the fifteen-minute trip into Fellhaven to consider. What could she do? She couldn’t back out; she didn’t like being called chicken.

Her lips twitched as she thought of him making that silly chicken noise. Stop smiling. He’s a ridiculous man and making chicken noises is sooo not attractive.

Yet, it had been. Charming in a boyish way.

She sighed. She hoped that Billy would think it a bad idea, but knew deep down that hope was futile. Billy would want to go because Craig was right. It would be good for Cat.

Sighing again, she walked out of the studio and back to the main house. So much for ignoring this thing between them and not spending any time with him outside of work.

Maybe she might come down with a bad cold or a headache or something in between now and then. She looked at her watch. Five-thirty. Not much chance of that happening.

Billy greeted her at the door, enthusing about taking Cat to the dance. Smiling and agreeing with him seemed to take a lot of effort and with some resignation she trudged up the stairs to get ready. She might as well make an effort. She didn’t want anyone to think she couldn’t enjoy herself.

After showering, she spent some time deciding what to wear. She didn’t want to be out of place at the dance but she didn’t want to be too casual either. The nights were still cold, but the dance hall would be warm. In the end she decided on an off-the-shoulder peasant blouse and floaty skirt in shades of blue that brought out the green in her eyes, and her aubergine trench for warmth. She spent some time doing her hair and carefully applying make-up, which she rarely wore, and finally satisfied, she headed back downstairs at seven.

Daemon pulled up in his sleek Aston Martin DB5 – the car famously driven by James Bond. Typical.

He got out and was heading around the car when he caught sight of her standing between the columns at the head of the steps. The feeling of foreboding and dread deepened as she saw the way he looked her up and down. She shouldn’t feel so good about the glint in his eye.
Get a grip
, she told herself, slipping her arms into her trench and belting it tightly around her body as she walked down the stairs towards him. He held the door open for her, then ran around the front of the car to hop in behind the wheel.

He gave her a glancing smile as he started up the car. ‘Ready for some fun?’

‘Yeah, sure.’ As the car took off she wondered again what she’d been thinking. This was a date and it felt too good.

The music was loud and vibrant, fiddles vying with plucky guitars and a hammering keyboard, drums driving the beat, the singer’s voice soaring over it all. The sound hit her like a wave. The hall was bright and colourful and hot, packed with people talking, dancing, drinking and eating. The air smelled of beer and perfume-coated perspiration.

Lexi had to fight the urge to run.

She hadn’t been in a crowded room like this for years. Sure, she’d spent much of the past ten years in pubs and small clubs all over England and Europe. But they were dark and moody, and she was able to slip in the back and stay hidden, unseen. This was completely different. The coloured lights flashing behind the band and on to the dance floor brought back visions of flashbulbs going off in her face. The sound of the crowd became the yelling of the press waiting for her outside the courtroom. The music was a roaring wave of sound, the fiddles like police sirens. Lexi fought the fear sweeping over her. Why on earth had she let herself get talked into this? She would have been much happier and far more comfortable at home.

Daemon took her arm in his, following the others. The bitter taste of fear lodged in her throat again as he pressed through the crowd and swept her to the edge of the dance floor. She looked over her shoulder, panic rising in fluttery waves as the safety of the doors receded and the rest of the group disappeared among the joyful dancing couples.

‘I think I’d rather . . . ’ She swallowed hard on the nausea boiling inside. Her fingers dug into his arm.

‘You’d rather what?’

He pulled her closer and she looked up into those deep blue eyes and found comfort and strength, and the slight cocky look she was coming to know and like. Her resolve strengthened. She was here to show him she was tougher than she seemed. Forcing a smile, she returned his gaze with an arched brow.

‘I thought we’d have a drink first, but this is good too.’ She turned and looked at the dancing couples. Some had obviously been watching too much
Dancing with the Stars
. ‘Think you’re up to this?’

His eyes sparkled in the changing lights. ‘I am if you are.’

‘Well, what are you waiting for?’

Before she could take another breath, he had swept her into his arms and on to the dance floor among the whirling, swirling, stamping dancers. It took her a moment to get into the swing; she hadn’t danced for a long time. She laughed as Daemon swung her from a two-step into a jive. He twirled, dipped, lifted and spun her around until her head felt like it would explode. He guided her into each move with experience and ease and she found herself matching him, easily following his lead.

Before she knew it the band was announcing they were taking a break for fifteen minutes.

She looked up to find him staring down at her. the smile in his eyes taking her breath away. He pulled her up, their bodies sliding together.

A tingle slid from her breasts down to her stomach.

The crowd was moving off to get drinks, fresh air and food. She became very aware they were the only two left on the dance floor.

Panting, she pushed the hair off her face and smiled, trying for casual. ‘That was fun. Thanks.’

‘My pleasure.’

His smile had that lupine quality that made her heart pound a little harder. His arm wrapped around her waist, their bodies so close she felt the rumble of his voice in her chest, his breath ruffling her hair. He was aware of what he was doing to her – she could see his intent reflected in his eyes. Melissa’s earlier words came back to her. Panic rose up in her throat again. She looked away, searching the crowd for the others. ‘I think I need that drink now.’

He let go of her, his smile a challenge. ‘Sounds like a good idea. I’ll get some. Beer okay by you?’

She nodded, still pretending to search for the others.

‘They’re over there.’ He leaned forward, his arm touching hers as he pointed.

It was as if a charge jumped from his skin to hers, bringing goosebumps and a not unpleasant shiver. She had to stop herself from blushing. She wasn’t a silly girl with a crush. Looking up, she got caught by his gaze. He was smiling, amused. It got her back up. ‘I’ll go and join them.’

She knew Daemon watched her as she walked away and wondered what he saw. His ex-wife had been an actress and model; Lexi would have thought that was his type. So what did he find attractive in her? She certainly wasn’t the model type. She was no-nonsense, barely spending any time over her hair or clothes, and never wore make-up in her day-to-day work. And even though she felt good in her skirt and peasant blouse tonight with her hair curling around her face and a little bit of make-up on, she knew the look was hardly fashion-forward or something that would catch a man’s eye.

Yet he found her attractive. She couldn’t mistake the heated desire in his eyes; it was so blatant. It made her skin burn, her body shake; it made her want to press closer. It was so like a touch that she could feel the moment he stopped watching her, turned around and headed to the bar. She snuck a peek over her shoulder. He seemed barely aware of the giggling and whispering as he passed.

She wasn’t. And she sympathised with those poor girls. There was just something about him that spoke of long hot nights and erotic things she’d never thought about before.

Shaking the thought away, she took a seat next to Billy, trying to ignore the prickle on the back of her neck. She knew Daemon had turned to look at her again.

‘You looked good out there,’ Billy said to her.

‘Thanks. You’ll have to get up with me when the band comes on next.’

Billy glanced at Cat. ‘I can’t.’

Cat sat passively. Sorrow sliced through Lexi. Cat loved dancing the way Lexi loved music.

‘Karl and I will look after Catriona while you go and have a few dances, William love.’ They turned to find Bev and Karl standing behind them with drinks and plates of food. They squished up on the bench seats, making room. Karl put a drink in front of her.

‘Daemon said to give you this. He’s got a little caught up.’

Lexi smiled as she looked through the crowd to see him surrounded by star-struck teenagers. ‘I can see that.’

She took a swig. The beer was cold, a refreshing difference from the room-temperature stuff usually served. She had got a taste for cold lager when travelling around Europe. ‘Are you sure you can look after Cat for a few dances?’

‘Absolutely, love. We always sit the next set out, so go and enjoy it.’

When the music started up, Billy led her to the dance floor. Phil and Melissa joined them. The singer announced they were going to do some old country dances. The crowd cheered and lined up, men on one side, women on the other. As Lexi box-stepped around Billy and then maypoled around Phil, she looked over to see what had happened to Daemon.

He was still caught up in the middle of his fans, smiling and chatting while signing autographs. Nigel stood behind him, keeping an eye on the mob, with Lyall behind him chatting to boys who were trying to be cool about the rock star in their midst.

She lost sight of Daemon as the couples moved up the line but the next time she saw him, he caught her glance. He shrugged his shoulders as if to say he was sorry. Lexi didn’t mind. She could see he enjoyed time with his fans. She smiled to let him know it didn’t matter and then got caught up in a complicated turn and grapevine step, swapping partners down the line until she found herself bowing off with Billy again.

The dances went on, feet tapping and stamping, arms raised, partners spinning. Alexia was having so much fun she lost track of time until the band stopped for another break. Billy led her back to the table and then took Cat outside for a walk in the crisp night air. Bev and Karl went for a walk outside as well. Craig, Nigel and Lyall were at the bar talking to one of the bar girls, and a crowd gathered around asking Craig for autographs. Phil started fussing to Melissa, saying she looked tired. Smiling indulgently, Melissa gave in to him this time and allowed him to take her home, but not before sending a saucy look Lexi’s way.

Chuckling, Lexi realised Melissa had no intention of resting when she got home with Phil. They had the whole house to themselves for a few hours – from the look on her face, and whatever she’d just whispered into Phil’s ear that made him blush, she was going to take advantage of that fact.

Their leaving meant Lexi was now sitting by herself. Not that she minded. It was good to have a few moments to get her wild thoughts and emotions under control.

Daemon. He was really doing her head in.

She looked around to see where he’d gone. At first she couldn’t see him but then caught a glimpse of him as the band’s singer cut through the throng of teenagers and pulled him to the side. They spoke briefly. An excited cheer went up from the teenagers and a few ran off. She frowned, wondering what that was all about. A moment later Daemon made his way over, sliding into the seat next to her and took her hand in his.

‘Sorry I abandoned you, but I make a point of never ignoring our fans.’

She had to concentrate on his words because suddenly all of her attention had been drawn to where his hand touched hers. ‘That’s okay.’ She coughed, clearing her throat. ‘Bev and Karl looked after Cat, so Billy and I got to dance the last set.’

‘So I saw. Looked like you were having fun.’

She didn’t like his tone. ‘I can see you hated all the attention. What a terrible problem to have all those adoring young things hanging off your every word.’

‘Jealous?’

The question caught her off guard. ‘No,’ she said a mite too quickly.

‘You are! You’re jealous!’

‘Well, so are you. You get this miffed sound in your voice every time I mention Billy’s name. I don’t know why. It’s not as if anything’s going on.’

‘Between you and him?’

‘No. Yes. No. Argh!’ She shook her head. ‘Billy and I are just friends, as you well know. What I meant was there is nothing going on between us, you and me.’

‘Isn’t there?’ He squeezed her hand and lifted it to his lips, kissing the back before turning it over, nibbling her palm. Heat gathered low in her belly. She snatched her hand away, rubbing where he’d been nibbling.

‘No, there isn’t.’

He grinned as if to say she could play that game all she liked, but he knew better.

She cleared her throat nervously and changed the subject. ‘What did the band’s singer want to talk to you about?’

‘He asked if we wouldn’t mind playing a song or two. He thought the “young ones” might like it.’

‘That’s a wonderful idea. You said yes?’

‘Of course I did. Do you know where the others are?’

‘Craig’s at the bar surrounded by fans – Lyall’s helping to keep them in check – and Nigel’s there chatting up one of the bar girls.’ She waved her hand in their direction.

‘Typical,’ he rolled his eyes. ‘Nigel can always be guaranteed to find someone to chat up. What about the others?’

‘Phil and Melissa are . . . Oh,’ she suddenly remembered. ‘Phil took Melissa home. She was feeling tired.’

‘Sure she was.’

She bit her lip, trying not to smile at his knowing tone. ‘You won’t be able to play now. They’re going to be so disappointed.’ She nodded towards the kids who were gathering around the stage. ‘What are you going to do?’

‘Shit.’ He looked crestfallen and then his face brightened as he turned to her.

A feeling of discomfort rose over her and she began to shake her head, afraid of what he was about to suggest.

‘I know. Craig can play the drums and you can play keyboards. You know all our songs and I know you can jam.’ He ignored the slow shaking of her head and stood up, grabbing her arm and hauling her to her feet. ‘Come on, let’s get the others.’

She dug her feet in and refused to budge. ‘Daemon, no. I can’t. I don’t play in front of other people.’

‘Yes you do.
I’ve
heard you. You’re brilliant.’

She shook her head. ‘You don’t count.’ She ignored his mock-injured expression. ‘The last time I tried to play in front of an audience I got terrible stage fright and ended up running off the stage. I wouldn’t be any good to you.’

‘Yes you would. Besides, it’s not like you’ll be up there by yourself. We’ll be up there too and without trying to sound conceited, no-one will be looking at you anyway.’

‘Thanks. It’s nice to know I’m so invisible.’

‘That’s not what I meant and you know it.’ He saw her lips twitch. ‘Come on, you wouldn’t want to disappoint them.’ He nodded towards the teenagers surrounding the stage. He turned back to her, a pleading puppy-dog look on his face. ‘If you don’t say yes I’m going to have to go over there and disappoint all those kids. Do you want that on your conscience?’

She narrowed her eyes. ‘That’s not fair.’

‘I know. Great isn’t it?’

She huffed. ‘You are such a smart, arrogant shit sometimes. I just want to —’

‘Kiss me?’

She blushed. ‘No. Hit you is more like it.’

‘I’d prefer a kiss.’ He bent down and brushed his lips across hers in a brief caress, catching her off-guard, then hauled her through the crowd to the stage.

Later she blamed the kiss for muddling her head, allowing herself to be dragged along to collect Craig. The next thing she knew, she was up on stage in front of the keyboards, looking down at a hoard of eager young faces. The lights flashed, blinding her as Daemon walked onstage. He winked at her before greeting the crowd, who screamed with excitement.

Daemon quickly explained the change in their line-up as he slung the guitar strap over his head the dance band’s guitarist had handed him. ‘Craig is taking a turn on drums and you all know AJ from the manor. She’s on keyboards.’

The crowd roared their acceptance and approval.

Dizziness swayed through Lexi’s head and she gasped for breath as she looked out at the sea of shadowed faces, their features lost in the glare of lights in her eyes. She started to tremble as the old stage fright reared its ugly head. She wasn’t going to be able to do this. She’d faint or puke or something awful. Already she felt the world spinning. She looked over at Daemon, ready to make an excuse, but he shot her a smile, the kind of intimate smile that made her see nobody but him. He was confident and unbelievably handsome. His blue eyes sparked with challenge. Performance energy burst off him in waves. Even Craig, who must have been used to it, seemed to feed off it. As it enveloped Lexi, the dizziness faded, her breathing evened out and she stopped shaking.