Knotted Roots (9 page)

“Anything
interesting out there?” I asked casually as I sat down across from him.  He
didn’t acknowledge that I had spoken, so I tried again.  “Hey!  Earth to
Chase!” I snapped my fingers in front of his face, finally catching his
attention.  His eyes looked a little glazed as he turned to face me.

“Sorry. 
I stepped out for a moment.  Did you say something?” he asked.

“Nothing
important,” I muttered, glaring at the window as if it was to blame for
capturing his attention, something that I was making a concerted effort to
gain  I couldn’t see anything out there that would capture someone’s attention
like that, which did more to irk me than his seeming inability to notice me.

“Chase,
are you staying for breakfast?  There’s plenty here,” Grandma asked as she put
the sausage on a plate and carried it over to the table. 

“I
would love to Ms. Betty, thank you.  Would you like some help?” he asked as he
stood and helped Grandma gather the food and bring it to the table.  What did I
do? I stared at him as he moved around the kitchen.  Not very helpful, I know,
but if you could have seen the way his jeans clung to his body...well, you
wouldn’t have been very helpful at that point either.  It really should be a
crime to look that good.

We
ate together, Chase and Grandma chatting the entire time.  It seemed that they
couldn’t run out of things to talk about.  I learned that Chase and Brian both
worked a second job year round, but cut their hours down to part-time during
the summer so they could help Grandma out.  Seemed silly to me, to want to
spend your entire summer on a farm, sweating to death in that heat.  They had
to be slightly deranged to want to do that.  I sure as hell didn’t find that to
be a good use of freedom.   Give me a beach, suntan lotion, and my favorite
bikini, and I was set for the day.

“Okay
kids, I’ve got some errands to run in town, so I’ll leave you two to clean up
this mess.  Please, try to stay out of trouble.” The last part directed solely
at me, which caused me to frown.  I shot her an angry glare, but she had
already turned her attention to Chase.              

“Do
ya want to drive my truck Ms. Betty?  I would hate for yours to break down
again,” offered Chase, his award-winning smile firmly in place.

“That’s
sweet of ya Chase, but if I do that, then you won’t have a way to get home. 
I’ll be fine, I promise,” she assured as she left the room.   I heard the front
door close as I sat at the table, staring in the direction she had gone.

I
stood and walked out of the room in a huff.  Again, she was treating Chase
better than me, trusting him to be the well behaved one.  I walked into the
living room and flopped down on the couch, throwing my head back as I tried to
control the anger I could feel building.  I had to calm down.  I couldn’t let
her words get to me like that.

I
closed my eyes and took a couple of deep breaths.  After a few minutes my anger
was in check, but my devious mind was working overtime.  If she wanted to see
trouble, I could show her trouble.  Dad had always said it was my middle name,
so maybe it was time to live up to everyone’s expectations.  I heard Chase’s
footsteps as he walked into the room.  They slowed until he came to stand in
front of my sprawled form.

“You
sure have a flair for the dramatics, don’t ya?” He sat down beside me on the
couch and smiled at me. 

I
sat up and locked eyes with him.  “What’s there to do for fun around here? 
‘Cause I’m in need of a release,” I said as I inched closer to him.  My bravado
began to slip as he closed the gap between us, his hand coming dangerously
close to my knee.

“I’m
thinking you already have something in mind,” he replied, moistening his lips
again.  Damn him and those glorious lips.  If he didn’t stop that soon we would
both end up in a ton of trouble.

“I
want to get out of here.  I
need
some excitement.  Now.” I stood up and
reached my hand down to help him up.  “And I think you know where I can find
what I need.”

* * * *

“Well...this
wasn’t exactly what I had in mind,” I said as the truck came to a stop at the
edge of a wooded area a few miles away from the house.  I looked over at him
and found him grinning. 

“You’re
in the middle of nowhere.  Where did you think I was taking ya? To the mall?”
he asked as he shut off the engine and climbed out of the truck.  I followed
suit, swinging my legs down to the ground, and straightened out my dress.

I
trailed behind him as we walked down a well-worn path.  I had no idea where he
was taking me, but for once I was grateful that I had worn flats.  Visions of
twisted ankles and bruised egos swirled through my mind as we walked through
the canopy of trees.  He didn’t speak another word as walked.  I was beginning
to get nervous when we reached an open area, buried deep in the woods, closed
off from the rest of the world.

My
breath caught in my throat as I took in the sight in front of me.  The sun
sparkled on the surface of the natural pond as the breeze casually pushed the
water around.  The sounds of birds chirped overhead, while the smell of
honeysuckle invaded my nose, the perfect picture of serenity.  It was
absolutely amazing.  I had never experienced something so natural, completely
untouched by human hands.  This was created by nature and it was enchanting.

“What
do ya think?” he asked as he raised his hand to my chin, playfully closing my
gaping mouth. 

“It’s...beautiful. 
I’ve never seen something so...damn,” I said as I continued to stare at the
shimmering water.  It looked so inviting.  I had no idea how clean it was, but
the urge to jump in and become one with nature threatened to overcome my
city-girl sensibilities.

“My
dad used to bring us here to fish every weekend.  I know it’s not exactly the
excitement you were hoping for...” I glanced over as his words trailed off. 
His eyes were closed as he lost himself in his memories.   

“It’s
perfect,” I said, smiling at him.  “Thank you.”

He
nodded and walked closer to the water’s edge.  He sat down and then looked over
at me, motioning for me to join him.  I sat down beside him, careful to keep
some distance between us. The hem of my dress rode up, showing off my firm,
tanned thighs.  I caught him taking a quick peek before he averted his eyes. 
Evidently he liked what he saw, which gave me a thrill.  So, he wasn’t quite
the
good guy
he wanted everyone to think he was, indulging in his carnal
side occasionally.

“Can
I ask ya something?” We had been quiet until then and his question caught me
off guard.  I nodded in encouragement.  “Why are ya really here? I mean, why
did your parents send ya to Betty?”

“You
mean Betty didn’t tell you all the sordid details?” I quipped.  I couldn’t let
him know that it was a sore subject with me.  I wasn’t ready to open up that
much yet.

“It’s
not her story to tell.  It’s yours.  That’s why I asked
you
,” he
replied, ignoring my tone and pushing ahead.

“My
parents said that they didn’t want me around for the nasty divorce.  Something
about keeping me neutral during the whole thing.  But I’m not so sure,” I
replied, my body deflating with each passing moment.  It hurt every time I
thought about it.  Speaking about it was ten times worse and I could feel my
heart shatter yet again. I was slightly shocked that I had even said anything
to him about it at all, considering I had just vowed not to open up to him, at
least not that much.

“Would
they have a reason to lie to you?”

“I
never thought so before.  They tried to hide what was going on,” I replied. 
“If I hadn’t stumbled on them during a weak moment, I’m not sure they would
have told me until after the whole debacle was over.”

“Divorce
can be hard on everyone involved.  Sounds like they were only trying to look
out for you,” he said as he picked at the grass between us. 

“And
this culture shock isn’t hard on
me
?  It’s like I’ve been thrust into a
whole new world where I can never fit in!” I jumped up as anger began to grow
again.  This time I wasn’t stopping it.  It was time to let it out.  “I’ve only
met my grandmother once before this week.  Once!  How could they possibly think
this was a good idea?”

He
stood up slowly, his hands raised in an act of defense.  He tried to walk
towards me but I backed away, unable to deal with his close proximity right
then.  His hands fell to his side as he spoke. “I think you’re doing a great
job adjusting, all things considered.”

“Ha!
Nice try, but I know what all of you think of me.  All you see is a spoiled
princess.  A brat.  I see it in everyone’s eyes when they look at me, so don’t
even try to deny it!”

“That’s
what ya want people to see when they look at ya!” he yelled, snapping my
attention to his face.  I couldn’t believe he yelled at me.  He was supposed to
be the calm one, the one who didn’t fly off the handle.  “When ya aren’t trying
to pull one over on everyone, I see those glimpses of the girl ya really are. 
The sweet girl who is scared to death of being alone.  The girl who would
rather keep someone at arm’s length so she didn’t get hurt.”

His
voice echoed around us. It bounced off of the surrounding trees and caused
birds to become silent.  I stared at the fierce expression on his face, no hint
of compassion remaining.  Crap.  I felt tears begin to threaten.  If I didn’t
get away now he would see me cry.  I couldn’t let him see that his words had
hit home.  I remembered Amber accusing me of the same thing a few years ago,
right after I broke up with Kevin Walker.  She had spent months getting us
together, and I threw it away after a week. 

I
hadn’t had the heart to tell her what he had done to me.  Why I broke up with
him.  If I had told her that he had touched my breasts, even after I told him
to stop, would she have believed me?  All signs pointed to no, because she had
never told a boy no.  I wasn’t like her.  That was how I had ended up with the
reputation of a cold fish.  And that was why she accused me of always pushing
people away.

I
raised my chin and spun on my heel, preparing to storm off, but his hand caught
my arm before I could take a step.  “Not this time Roxie.  Ya can’t keep
running from everything.” His tone was gentler this time, but the frustration
was still there.  He was trying to calm down too.  Both of us were failing
miserably.

“I’m
not running from anything,
Chase
,” I spat his name at him, hoping my
words would make him release me.  “You need to let me go.”

“I
can’t do that.  Ya need a friend right now, and it seems I’m the only one
volunteering for the job.” I have friends! Lots of them!  Well...I
had
friends.  Before I came down here.  I hadn’t actually heard from anyone from
back home since my last “chat” with Amber.

I
jerked my arm out of his grasp and tried to stare him down, but he was better
at this game than I was. “You think you’ve got me all figured out, don’t you? 
You’ve known me all of a couple of weeks, but you know me better than I know
myself, right?” I wrapped my arms around my midsection, trying to hold the pain
I was feeling inside.  “What’s the point of all of this? Why the hell do you
care?”

He
shook his head, completely exasperated with my dramatics.  I wanted to open up
to him.  A part of me was screaming to grab hold of him and tell him
everything, but that damn wall I had built around my heart just wouldn’t let
me.  Even after all these years, Kevin was still winning.  “Maybe one day
you’ll get it Roxie.  Maybe one day you’ll see that there are genuinely good
people out there.  People who aren’t out to screw ya over or hurt ya.  But
until then, you’re going to be one very lonely young woman.”

He
walked away from me, his hands fisted at his sides.  I wasn’t about to let him
get the last word, even though the rational part of my brain was yelling at me
to shut up.  “You don’t know shit Chase Matthews! Not a damn thing!” I yelled
to him, but he ignored me, continuing on his path.  I kicked at a rock on the
ground, sending it skittering across the dirt.  It should have made me feel
better, but it didn’t. 

The
only thing that would make me feel better right then would have been grabbing
that infuriating boy and holding him to me.  Even after everything that had
just happened, all I could think about was kissing him.  I let out a frustrated
growl and then stalked off in the direction he had gone.  I didn’t need him at
all.  I just wanted him, and that was so much worse.

CHAPTER TEN

The
drive home from the pond was quiet.  Neither of us spoke, the air heavy with
tension.  He dropped me off in the driveway and immediately left.  No
goodbyes.  No assurance that we would see each other again.  While I still had
the urge to taste him, I knew it was for the best.  Nothing could ever happen
between us, right?  But that didn’t mean that he was any less enticing.  

I
noticed Grandma’s truck parked out front, but it wasn’t until I made it closer
to the house that I saw her sitting in one of the rocking chairs, watching me. 
I walked up the stairs slowly, watching her carefully.  Could she tell that
Chase and I had a fight?  If she launched into another lecture about staying
away from him I would scream.  Now I knew she had been right to tell me to stay
away, but there was no way I was going to admit that to her.

“Did
ya have a nice day honey?” she asked, her chair no longer rocking.  I looked
over at her and she looked relatively calm, so I decided to sit with her. 

“It
was fine,” I said as I sat down gently in the rocking chair next to her.