Let Me In (24 page)

“Jessa,” I grit through clenched teeth. Completely exasperated by this conversation and obviously not thinking straight, I make the mistake of saying, “Either come with me now or I’m not coming back here tonight.”

Before the answer leaves her mouth, I’m already hitting myself. “Fine, see you around. Call me when you grow the fuck up.” With that, she stomps out of the room.

“Fuck!” I slam my fist against the doorframe on my way out. How can she not see my point? She’s being naïve as fuck to think the dipshit isn’t going to attempt to get her in his bed. The fact that I just pushed her toward him pisses me off more, but I’m left with no other choice. I have to leave and meet with my group, otherwise I fail. If I fail, we have no future anyway.

I toss my bag into the bed of my truck, thanking God when it starts after sitting for a week. Peeling out of the driveway, I leave her. Slamming my fist into the steering wheel as I drive to the frat house, I shake my head, outraged at myself. I might have just handed my girlfriend over to her ex. Fuck!

Jessa

The nerve of Grant. How dare he think I should go stay in that fucking frat house when he won’t even be there? Give me a break. It’s only a matter of five hours that he’ll be gone. What exactly does he think will happen? That I’ll just hop in bed with Rob for old times’ sake? Ugh, he pisses me off.

I toss my bag onto the chair in my room and see Rob through the open bathroom door, playing his guitar. I slam my bathroom door shut, not wanting to hear anymore shit from him. When he starts playing
“Sorry”
by Art of Dying, I want to strangle him. Is that his way of apologizing to me? No, I think to myself, he’s just being a smart ass. The longer he plays, the louder he becomes, so I throw my body on the bed and cover my ears with a pillow but it doesn’t help. Every time he sings the words ‘I’m Sorry’, I swear he’s right outside my door. Not being able to take it any longer, I throw the door open and, just as I assumed, Rob’s standing there, playing his guitar and singing for me.

I cross my arms, impatiently waiting for him to finish. After he sings the last sentence, he bites his lower lip and stares intently at me. In this moment, I don’t see the asshole who cheated on me. I see the guy who helped me forget my past for a few months. Grant might have been the one to help me heal, but Rob provided a distraction from the shame I felt. Rob just isn’t the guy you marry…he’s the one you date before you get married.

“Are you finished?” I ask him, attempting to accentuate my annoyance.

“Believe it or not, I am sorry. If what you say is true, that was a shitty thing for me to do.” He stands up and places his hand out for me to shake. I glance down at it skeptically before looking back up at him. “Come on, I’m trying to do the noble thing here.”

Reluctantly, I shake his hand, feeling the numerous calluses on his fingertips from all the playing he’s done the past few months. “But it’s so out of character for you,” I remark and he chuckles.

“Maybe I’m trying to turn over a new leaf.” He lets go of my hand and we stand there on either side of the doorway as though we’re strangers.

“Good luck with that,” I say sarcastically.

“Thanks, this is my first try. How am I doing?” He smirks at me and I’m hit with the memory of our first meeting.

“Song helped.”

“Jessa, I swear I don’t remember having that conversation. Most of the tour was a blur. I was pretty fucked up the whole time. It shouldn’t have been like that. I should have called you…”

I raise my hand to silence him. “It’s done, Rob. I think you know as well as I do that we weren’t meant for each other. You’re not ready to settle down, and I needed more than you were willing to offer.”

“And frat boy gives that to you?” he questions and even now, the dislike in his tone is clear.

“Grant?” I clarify. “Yes, he’s given me everything I need and more.” He nods his head up and down, almost as if absorbing what I’m saying.

“I still think he’s a douche and won’t stick around,” he says, then automatically puts his hands in the air in defense. “I’m just saying.”

“Well don’t, Rob. He makes me happy.”

“It sure didn’t sound like he’s making you happy. I heard the yelling,” he says with a smirk, as though he just made his point.

“Because of you,” I inform him.

“Sorry about that. Actually…I’m not.” He shrugs his shoulders. “Can I have a hug?” he asks, and I step up to him hesitantly. There’s nothing wrong with a hug, right?

As soon as my arms wrap around his neck, he pulls me close, whispering, “I am sorry, Jessa.” He sounds sincere, and I’m thinking about forgiving him when I feel him grab my ass. I abruptly push him away.

“What the fuck, Rob?” I yell.

“Oh come on, Jess, just one more time. I’ve missed that body on top of mine and that mouth around my cock. I promise, my lips are sealed. Richie Rich will never know.” He attempts to walk toward me again, but I firmly press him back and he stumbles against the door frame. What happened to that guy who was here a second ago?

“Jesus, Rob! What happened to turning over a new leaf?” I ask, starting to leave the room.

“I can’t change, baby, it’s just not in me.” His voice is void of his usual cocky attitude, sounding despondent instead.

I turn around to face him and see that his crazy blue eyes are filled with emotion. I wonder if I am seeing a side of Rob that most people miss.

With a quick blink of his eyes, it’s gone. “Well, you know where to find me when you need a good fuck,” he laughs and I shake my head, leaving the room.

Jogging down the steps, I debate where I should go. I know I need to apologize to Grant, and although I didn’t like his possessive behavior, I understand it. Especially after Rob just groped me. It wouldn’t do any good to go over to his house now, since he’s still at the study session for a couple more hours. I look out the window and see Trey leaning against the porch railing, smoking a cigarette. When did he start smoking?

With time to kill, I swing the door open and Trey stumbles backward in surprise. “Jessa!” he exclaims, sounding as though he was expecting someone else.

“Trey!” I mimic his tone and he chuckles. I swear this boy might be the happiest person I’ve ever met. “What’s with the smoky treat?” I point to the cigarette in his hand.

“Stress,” he sighs and I giggle.

“You and stress. That’s an unusual combination,” I joke. He gives me a hardy-har-har before extinguishing his cigarette and throwing his arm around me.

“Let’s go get some Jack,” he says. I start walking inside, but he quickly circles me around toward the steps leading off the porch.

“I need some air and I assume you do too after that sweet serenade,” he chuckles, and I’m happy to see the teasing Trey back.

I playfully smack my hand on his stomach and he shoots back as though I hit him hard. “What? It was…nice,” he kids and I hit him again. “Ouch, stop it!” he whines.

“Be a man.” We continue our light-hearted banter on the way to the bar. Today is a perfect spring day so we decide to walk instead of drive. As much as I wish I could be making up with Grant right now, I’m happy to have some alone time with Trey. I know how important this group project is to Grant, and I wish I wouldn’t have sent him there upset. But I need to give him the space to do his work and then I’ll jump his bones tonight.

We arrive at The Loft and Trey grabs a booth, which isn’t difficult since the older bar is mostly vacant of people. I shouldn’t be surprised since it’s a Sunday evening. It’s mainly couples filling the tables, eating pizza and drinking beer. Definitely a much tamer crowd than normal. Trey walks up to the bar to order a few beers and I see a cute girl saunter over to the stool next to him. He glances at her and then turns back toward Pete, the bartender. No flirting, no eye roaming, and no touching. Where the hell is Trey and who’s the preacher at the bar?

Taking our drinks from Pete, he doesn’t give the flirtatious girl another glance before coming back to the booth. After he sets down the drinks and scoots in across from me, he notices my raised eyebrows.

“What?” he asks, completely unaware. “Did you want something else?” Oh shit…he’s done for.

“Um…my drink is fine, thank you.” I’m second-guessing if I should say something, afraid if I point it out, he’ll attempt to prove me wrong. That’s the last thing I want. “How’s Pete?”

“Good. He said it’s been pretty dead all day. Everyone’s just getting back from spring break.” I realize now that he honestly isn’t aware he walked right by a gorgeous girl, ready for the taking.

“How’s Kailey?” I ask, assuming that she’s the one on his mind. He wasn’t around a lot in Colorado and when he was, I wasn’t always available to talk.

“Good. It’s weird being back here though. We spent so much time together in Colorado, it feels…weird being away from her,” he admits.
He’s staring into his beer and rotating the glass in a circle, back and forth.

“Why don’t you go see her?” I ask. I wasn’t able to get a lot of Kailey’s story, but I thought she lived on her own with a friend. If that’s the case, I’m unsure what the problem is and why they can’t continue to see one another.

“She had some stuff to take care of,” he informs me, clearly upset by her decision. The look in his eyes resembles that of a boy who just lost his favorite toy.

“Okay…but you’ll see her tomorrow, right?” I ask, attempting to make him feel better. What happened to my good-humored, happy-go-lucky Trey?

“Nope. She said she can only see me on the weekends that she has a busy schedule but we can meet up on Friday. I’m going to ask her to come to the show.” With that, he finally picks up his head and I see his eyes glimmer with happiness. Yep…this boy is a goner. Say good-bye ladies, Kailey has stolen the heart of Trey Michaels.

“Just concentrate on that. You can always call and text her until then,” I say soothingly. “You do know you’ve only known her for a week?”

“Don’t remind me. I’m walking around like some fucking puberty-stricken boy who just got his first boner. This isn’t me Jessa, what the fuck?” he asks angrily.

“Just go with it. Don’t overthink things, okay? It’ll happen if and when it’s supposed to.” I wish I would’ve taken my own advice months ago when I first met Grant. At that thought, the sudden urge to see him and make everything right blazes through me. I check my phone and see that there’s still half an hour before he’s done.

“Yeah, I’m trying. I just want her so bad. Not even in bed, Jessa. Hell, I’d settle for her just sitting next to me. God damn.” His whole demeanor appears as though he’s being tortured.

“Relax. Try to keep yourself busy,” I tell him and he scoffs at me.

“I check my phone constantly and she never fucking calls. She hasn’t even texted me since we dropped her off.” I can tell he’s getting more frustrated and confused by the minute.

“Calm down, Trey!” I scold. His eyes find mine and he seems to calm a little. “It’s a new relationship. If she has stuff to do, she has stuff to do. It doesn’t mean she’s not thinking about you,” I say, giving my best attempt to bring him back to reality.

For the remaining time we’re at the bar, Trey appears calmer, even if he does check his phone about every two minutes. As much as I wish I could tease him, I don’t want to make him shy away from his feelings for Kailey. He deserves the happiness that I’m certain she’ll bring him.

At the same time, I can’t help but wonder why she won’t see him except for weekends. We all carry full loads but still manage to get out and let off some steam every once in awhile.
Of course, I don’t mention any of this to Trey. He’s already freaked out enough as it is.

I’m eager to see Grant. I hate that we parted the way we did and I just want his arms around me. I throw some money on the table but Trey’s not paying attention. He’s glancing at his phone again, pressing on the screen to make sure it’s on. Oh, he’s got it bad.

“Okay, let’s get going,” I say, grabbing my phone off the table. I’m surprised there aren’t any texts or calls from Grant. He should’ve been out twenty minutes ago, and I thought for sure he would call me when he was done. Shaking it off that maybe his meeting ran late, I finally look back up to see Trey staring at the girl from earlier.

“See you back at the house. You’re good, right?” he asks, his eyes focused squarely on the brunette.

“I’ll be fine but Trey…” I stand up and he follows suit.

“Just go…” he says, smirking over to her. I want to rip his eyes out of their sockets and drag him out of the bar.

“You’ll regret it,” I warn, trying to detour him. Just then, his phone rings and I’m hopeful it’s Kailey. Trey digs in his pocket at lightning speed, and then surprises me by pressing ‘ignore’ and shoving it back into his pocket.

“Fuck it. See you, J-doll. Give my best to the hubby.” He gives me a kiss on the cheek and then swaggers over to the girl, wrapping his arm around her shoulders, never looking back at me.

I hate what he’s doing, but the more I tell him he should leave, the more stubborn he’ll become. Kailey has him all shook up, and he’s like a lost penguin trying to find his way to the ocean. Too excited to see Grant to worry about it anymore, I leave Trey to his ways and start walking up the hill. I hate the frat house, but my anticipation of seeing Grant is too great to deter me from going there. After spending day and night with him this past week, it’s excruciating not having him near me all the time.

Suddenly, I understand what Trey is talking about. But there’s no way in hell I’m about to tell him that the feeling of wanting someone near you at all times doesn’t diminish, even months later. He’d be trying to arrange a threesome if he knew that.

The house appears quiet when I ring the bell. All I hear is some guy shout for me to come in, so I slowly open the door to find a few of Grant’s frat brothers playing Xbox and arguing amongst themselves. One guy is actually standing up, feverishly pressing the buttons, while the others call out profanities. Finally, some guy with reddish hair hollers over to me. I think his name is Matt.

“Hey, Jessa. Right?” he asks and I answer affirmatively. “Go ahead upstairs,” he tells me. Thanking him, I walk over to the old, wooden steps and wait as a couple passes me coming down the stairs. I’m always surprised at how many people mill around this place. It’s a never-ending stream of people, both guys and girls, rotating in and out of here. The thought of having to live like that, never knowing who’s around, gives me the creeps. I wonder how Grant has done it this long.