Lie to Me (an OddRocket title) (28 page)

"Shit," he said. "Shit. Shit. Shit."

I saw my chance to get away and ran up the stairs, stumbling and banging my shin on the top step. I couldn't stand being on that boat another moment.

"Cassie!" He shouted after me and I felt his hand graze my ankle as I climbed above deck. But he was sloppy and I was faster than him, slipping just out of reach. I jumped off the boat and lost my balance tripping on the yellow extension cord hanging off the bow. I fell face first onto the dock. I could feel splinters driving into my palms and hear RD stumbling in Kismet's cockpit. I pulled myself up and ran as fast as I could down the dock. I felt like I was running away from every horrible thing I'd ever done.

"Cassie! Come back!" RD shouted and I could hear his uneven footsteps behind me. But he was drunk and unsteady, so I had quite a lead. I don't know what I thought. Would he hurt me? Or would he try to talk me out of telling? Would he pretend he loved me again, hoping it would buy him some more time? My stomach turned as I imagined his lips against mine.

I still had my backpack, but when I closed the gate and reached the parking lot, I couldn't find Mariah's keys. Why had I locked the car? I stood in front of the Mustang and could see RD weaving down the dock. I must have dropped the keys when I fell or left them on the boat. I felt in my pockets; they weren't there.

"Cassandra!" RD shouted. I ducked down beside the car, shaking. Fireworks exploded overhead. They were blue and yellow stars. Any other time, I would have thought they looked just like RD's sails. A week ago, I would have thought this was a sign that we were still connected somehow, that we shared a love so big that I found him everywhere in the world.

Now, the glimmering fireworks looked like ordinary stars. They fell in slow motion and hovered above the rocky shore of Jekyll Beach. I could hear the thump of a bass playing and the bonfire faintly lit up the sky in the distance. My old life was on the other side of the woods. The party at Jekyll Beach, RD wouldn't dare come after me there. I stayed low as I weaved through cars in the parking lot.

Gravel crunched beneath my tennis shoe. The car doors felt cold against my skin as I leaned up against them, using them as shields. I worked my way to the last row. I could see the opening to the waterside trail that led to the beach beyond a small grassy field. I crouched beside the hubcap of an enormous SUV, heart pounding, knees shaking and bleeding from my fall. I waited.

I waited until I couldn't hear him shouting anymore, until the metal door of the gate clanked shut and I heard his uneven footsteps walking back down the ramp to Kismet. I took a deep breath and ran toward the path. I hoped I'd waited long enough.

I didn't know these trails as well as the Forgotten Woods. For one thing, these woods were much deeper. They extended from the water all the way to the road, which was why parties at Jekyll Beach were so popular. The thick trees acted as insulation.

The little light that trickled in from the outside world disappeared quickly as I ran down the trail. I stopped for a moment and blinked in the darkness, waiting for my eyes to adjust. It was as if I had run into a cave, except this cave had roots and logs strewn across the floor. The air smelled dark and moist. When I tripped on a log and crashed to the ground, I tasted the dirt.

I wished I had a flashlight. I wished I had my cell phone. I wished I'd never taken RD's hand or let him kiss me.

It was too dangerous to run, so I walked as fast as I could. Fireworks exploded one after another, a crescendo of noise that could only be the finale. They lit up the path in flashes, but when I glanced skyward, I'd see spots.

"Cassie?" RD's voice drifted through the woods and I swallowed a scream. I couldn't tell if he was right behind me or if he was still on the dock. Voices carried strangely in the woods.

I walked faster toward the sound of the music. I wasn't going to let RD get away with this. He couldn't tell everyone I was a liar. It wasn't true. I wasn't going to allow anyone to lie to me ever again. Not RD, not Mom, not Aunt Lucy and, especially, not myself.

When I saw the flicker of a bonfire in the distance, I ran. Light from the party spilled into the woods, making the path more manageable. The trail was overgrown with bushes and ferns, but I ran forward, pushing myself through the branches. Thorns pulled at my shirt and skin, but I didn't care. The scent of over-ripe blackberries filled the air as I blazed my own trail. Finally, I stepped clear of the woods into an open, grassy field by the beach occupied by San Sebastian's junior and senior class.

Heads turned and jaws dropped. I wiped my chin, knowing I had blood on my face, and I was sure I'd carried some of the woods out in my hair. I smiled and brushed off my legs. The last time I'd seen most of these people, Nick had announced to everyone that I'd had sex in the boathouse. And I didn't care anymore, because I had. It was true and it was nobody's business but mine. I felt like I'd fought a war and was still standing.

"Cassie!" Priya stepped out of the crowd and ran across the grass. Eyes wide, she almost slipped on the slick ground. "What happened to you? Are you okay?"

"I'm okay," I said, glancing over my shoulder. I wanted to be sure RD hadn't followed me. "I'll tell you later. I promise, Priya." I took a deep breath. There was so much I wanted to talk with her about. "I'm sorry I haven't been around. I haven't been myself. It's..." I choked. My tears were unexpected. I wanted to apologize for disappearing, for letting RD steal me away, but I couldn't get the words out.

"Oh, Cassie." Priya threw her arms around me and gave me a tight hug. Her voice got higher as she fought to keep from crying. When you've known someone since Kindergarten, you can tell that kind of stuff. "You don't have to apologize to me for anything."

"No, I do."

"But I'm the one that's sorry," she said. "I didn't know what to say to you. I haven't known what to do. And then that whole mess with Nick." She stepped away from me and dropped her eyes.

"It's okay," I said. "Sometimes things get out of control, I understand that. People make mistakes, Priya."

"You serious?" She wiped her nose. "Is the cold front over? You forgive me? For real this time?"

"Yes," I said, knowing it was true. I'd been so lonely without my friend. A wave of chills shook my body. "Hey, can you drive me home?" I said. "I drove Mariah's car here, but I can't find the keys and I need to get back." I figured my only shot was to go home and tell Mariah what I'd done. Come clean and accept the consequences. It felt like a small penance and I was just grateful that the aching hole in my chest from RD had closed.

"But you just got here." Priya looked confused.

"I know." I started to cry. "I just want to go home. Can you help me?"

"Sure, Cassie. Sure." Priya reached out and held my arm. "Whatever you need. I'll help you. Just tell me what to do."

"Thank you." I sniffed, wondering how I could have taken so long to forgive my friend.

"Okay, let me go get my keys. I left them in my jacket by the bonfire. Don't go anywhere."

I stood and faced the water, looking past the crowd of partygoers. My heart seemed to beat three times as fast. I felt as though I'd just come back from a long vacation in a different time zone. I felt tired and disoriented, but so happy to be home. I missed Addie and Mom. I even missed Aunt Lucy. I felt terrible about all the lies I'd told, the pain I'd caused Mom and Aunt Lucy. I wanted my family back, even if I could only have them for a little while. I would take whatever I could get.

Priya waved at me from the bonfire; apparently, she was having trouble finding her keys. Closer to the water, I saw a group of guys getting high by an oil drum someone had turned into a makeshift fire pit. One of them threw his head back and laughed, running his fingers through his hair. I would have recognized that gesture anywhere. It was Nick.

Old Cassie would have debated for a good thirty minutes whether or not to go talk to him. New Cassie didn't think twice.

"So, I say we take one of the harbor sailboats." Nick inhaled and held the smoke in his lungs for a few seconds. “It’s a tradition man. You guys aren’t afraid, are you?”

"I need to talk to you, Nick," I said, only looking at him. I pretended like his friends didn't exist.

"Holy shit. Hey, Cassie." He coughed. "I didn't think you'd show."

"Can we have a sec?" I smiled my best move-your-ass-or-I'll-move-it-for-you smile and his little posse of pot smokers took off. I guess I was impressive even with dirt in my hair.

"What the hell happened to you?"

I answered him with a cool stare. "None of your business."

"Hey, we're going to go sailing. You know, out-race the Jekyll ghost by midnight."

"Don’t be stupid. No one's going out there. Last year a girl died. Don’t you remember?"

"You know, Cass. You are a serious buzz-kill sometimes." He offered me a drag.

I shook my head. "Where is my note?"

"Jeez, Cassie." He coughed again. "What is up with you? How about, 'I'm sorry I punched you at the party, Nick.'"

"I'm surprised you even remember that I punched you." Over his shoulder, I could see people standing in groups, whispering and pointing. Were they pointing because we had broken up, because I'd punched him and made a scene, because my mother was dying, or because I looked like I'd just wrestled a blackberry bush and lost?
All of the above
, I thought.

"You have a point." He smiled. "I don't remember everything, but my nose still hurts. You've got quite an arm."

"And you have my note." I held out my hand. "It's not yours. It belongs to me." I said this slowly, knowing that my voice contained a power I hadn't felt before. I knew he'd do exactly what I asked. "Give it back."

Holding his joint between his lips, he reached into his wallet and took out a folded, light blue envelope. "How'd you know I'd have it with me?'

"I didn't." My fingertips shook as I held the note in my hand. Not because I was afraid, but because I couldn't believe what I was doing. I was saying exactly what I wanted and I wasn't afraid. And it wasn't because of RD. It was because of Mom. I'd been watching my mother slip away from me every day and I'd slipped away with her, too. But now I was back. And Mom was right. I was stronger than I knew. RD hadn't changed me. I'd been strong all along. He'd just made me forget. "Did you show it to anyone?"

"No." He looked at me like I was crazy. A mosquito buzzed by his hair and he blew at it quickly. "I stole it, Cassie. I wouldn't show it to other people. I felt bad about taking it right after. I really did."

"Right." I shivered.

"I'm sorry about a lot of things," Nick said. He looked at me sheepishly, his head lowered, hands in his pockets. “The way we ended, it wasn’t right. You deserved better and I’m ashamed of what I did. I’m sorry I hurt you, Cass.”

“Thanks,” I said softly, surprised by his apology. I hadn’t realized how long I’d been waiting to hear it.

"You're cold." He took off his fleece and handed it to me. I hesitated. "Come on, Cass. It's just a fleece. It doesn't mean we're getting back together. I know that."

I nodded and took off my backpack. I slipped his note inside right next to the photograph. I had my proof. RD could deny rumors, but he couldn't deny the truth. I zipped up Nick's fleece, grateful for the warmth.

"Oh, yeah!" Nick took a few, quick steps toward the water and, looking out at the growing chop, he clapped his hands. "Holy shit, I knew it. I knew someone would do it."

"What is it?" Priya ran up beside me. "I got the keys, Cass." The crowd gathered around us and moved closer to the water. It amazed me how people intuitively grouped together even when they didn’t know why. The air hung heavy with smoke from the finished fireworks show; it formed an artificial fog that made it difficult to see.

"Someone's sailing out to Jekyll, man!" Nick and his group of friends waded into the water up to their calves, laughing hysterically. "I told you we weren't a bunch of lame-asses."

In the distance, a little yellow sailboat bounced around in the waves.

"You ready to go?" Priya asked, shivering at the water's edge. I nodded, but couldn't tear my eyes away from the boat. The night had chilled and the wind grew stronger on the Sound. Moonlight caught on the sailor's lemon-yellow and lime-green jacket. It had reflective stripes down the arms that flashed in the darkness. There was no mistaking that jacket. My sister wore it almost every day.

My blood turned cold. "Addie!" I screamed, running into the water up to my knees. I wanted to reach out across the waves and pull her back to shore. Already, the boat had drifted farther away. It didn't look like she even had the tiller in her hands. Why would she? She barely knew how to sail. She'd been begging me to help her learn all summer and I hadn't listened.

"Are you sure that's her?" Nick grabbed my arm.

"That's Addie," I yelled, trying to slap his hand away, but he wouldn't let go. "She'll drown. She doesn't know how to sail. Oh, my God." I breathed so quickly, I felt a head rush come on and, suddenly, I was seeing stars. "Let go of me." I peeled his hands off me, stumbling back toward the woods.

"Cassie, wait." Priya ran after me. "Where are you going?"

"To save my sister." I ran into the woods back toward the marina. This was my fault. Addie had threatened to sneak out the next time I disappeared. I’d woken her up sneaking out and she’d followed me. And now, because I'd needed to see RD, she was out there on the water.

My heart pounded and my legs felt weak, but I ran harder. I'd felt so strong, thinking I had nothing left to lose in this world, that believing RD's lies and the slow grief of watching Mom fade was the worst thing that could ever happen to me. If I didn't hurry, I was going to lose more than I'd ever imagined.

One of the reasons you don't sail at night, at least not dinghy-sailing, is that there are no lights on those boats. Addie was basically invisible until the moonlight hit her white sails or flashed on her jacket. It was the ugliest jacket in the world, but at least I could see it; I loved my sister's ugly coat.