Looking At Forever (The Rock Gods Book 4) (40 page)

“What if he crossed the line?” Wheland asked. “Would you go for it or push him away?”

Tony sat back against the couch and shook his head. “Why are you doing this? What purpose does this serve you? Hmm?”

“I’ve seen the way you look at each other and how you respond to him being nearby,” Wheland said. “Hell, a few hours ago I walked in on you two sharing some kind of a fucking
moment
that I’d swear meant something.”

“You’ve got to be kidding me!” Tony said. “What you walked in on was not sexual, you idiot!”

“Fine. Suit yourself,” Wheland said. “All I’ll say is you’re wasting precious time by ignoring what’s right in front of your fucking face. But, if you ever need someone to talk to, I’m here for you. Got it?”

“What-fucking-ever,” Tony growled, and pushed himself off the couch to walk into the bathroom.

Wheland watched Tony’s retreat and scratched his head. He’d tried to help Tony see what he was ignoring and had obviously failed. Wheland needed to stop beating his head against a wall over the stupid people around him. Life was short. That was a lesson Rooster’s mom had proven with her early passing. He hoped he had many more years ahead with Rooster. There were so many things he wanted to do with him, places he wanted them to see together, and adventures to share.

Thinking about his beautiful man sleeping in bed had Wheland’s body reacting. He stood up from the chair and started down the hallway to the bedroom. He was passing by Alex’s bunk when the privacy curtain slid open and Alex jumped out onto the floor.

“We’re having a baby girl!” Alex said, a little too loudly for the slumbering bus occupants.

“What? How do you know that?” Wheland asked.

A moment later, Cooper’s curtain opened, and Tony stepped out of the bathroom. Alex suddenly had everyone’s attention.

“Who’s having a baby?” Tony asked.

“I am, dickwad,” Alex said.”

“Funny, you don’t look knocked up,” Tony said.

Alex shoved Tony on the shoulder and he stumbled into the wall behind him.

“Danni had some test done that can tell you the sex of the baby,” Alex said. “She found out this afternoon we’re having a girl!”

“A girl,” Cooper sighed. “You’ll have fun keeping all the boys away from sniffing that tree!”

“No one is sniffing anything on my little girl,” Alex declared.

“Good luck with that,” Wheland said. “You better hope she isn’t born with your libido!” Wheland pulled Alex in for a hug. “And I hope she looks like Danni,” Wheland said. “She’s way better looking than you.”

“Are you the dad, or is Chase?” Tony asked.

“That’s a damn good question,” Alex said, and shrugged. “We’ve chosen not to find that out because me and Chase... together, will always be this little girl’s daddies.”

“Is that the same as,
who’s your daddy
?” Cooper asked, and everyone laughed, except for Alex.

“Fuck all of you,” Alex groaned. “I’m trying to share my good news with my brothers and this is how you react? It makes me wonder how fucking old you guys really are.”

Wheland saw the smile curling Alex’s lips and knew he wasn’t upset by their jabbing remarks. Deep down they all loved and respected each other unconditionally and he was happy about that. Wheland remembered Alex calling them “brothers by choice” and that’s exactly what they were at the root of everything. They didn’t need a family tree to make them brothers. They’d achieved that status all on their own with trust and hard work at communicating. Their communication skills weren’t always the best, but Wheland knew they were a work in progress and that was close enough.

Each of them were starting new chapters in their lives; hard earned life changes, and they all understood the significance behind them. Cooper was marrying Jayson sometime later this year, in another few months Alex would become a first time dad, and Wheland was eager to start a life with Rooster. If Tony and Jared would finally embrace what they were feeling for each other, they’d all be on this love boat together sailing off into that proverbial sunset.

And, everything would be... perfect.

Epilogue

Five Months Later...

The tour was finally behind them, including all the rescheduled shows they’d missed due to the break they’d taken after Rooster’s mother passed. They’d even managed to squeeze in two new shows added on to the tail-end of the tour, plus a music festival thrown in for good measure. All of it was done and over with and was nothing more than a memory for them. Mostly good memories for Wheland, but he couldn’t speak for the rest of the guys, especially Dagger’s band-mates. He still wondered what would happen between Dante and Ashton with the tour finally over, especially since they had no real reason to see each other now unless they truly wanted to.

They boarded their last charter flight home from the tour in Providence, Rhode Island; destination: Los Angeles, and Wheland was overjoyed at the prospect of sleeping in his own bed for a change. Each of them was dog-tired, but there was also a sense of jubilation among them for completing such a grueling tour. The success of the double-billed shows with Ivory Tower and Black Ice performing together had prompted management into talks of a European tour for both bands sometime next year.

Wheland didn’t want to think about that tour possibility right now. His main focus was getting Rooster home with him and, after a brief visit with Rooster’s dad and sister, they were heading north for a long vacation at Rooster’s Vancouver cabin.

Vacation.

The word was alien to him, and to everyone else in the band, but they were all doing it in their own ways. Alex was going home to await the arrival of his first child and couldn’t stop talking, and stressing about being a father. Wheland had no doubt Alex would be an exceptional dad, as would Chase. The three of them together had something very special and any child would be blessed to be born into such a loving home.

Cooper and Jayson had decided to hold off on their wedding, since neither of them was in any hurry and they already felt fully committed in every sense of the word. Plus they’d had so little time to make plans for a wedding while on such a long tour. Cooper wanted their wedding to be spectacular, yet intimate, much like Dagger and Ryan’s, and Alex, Chase, and Danni’s ceremonies. In order to do that, Cooper wanted downtime without distractions to plan the wedding properly and Jayson was more than happy to let him do it.

Wheland started thinking about his trip with Rooster up to the cabin. He had never been there but was anxious to see the place where Rooster found his “true self.” Sharing the enormity of that revelation in the place it happened was deeply meaningful for both of them. They’d been on such a journey together and it was fast coming up on their first year anniversary. The time they’d spent together had been nothing short of magical. Wheland hated sounding sappy like that, but it was the best way to describe what had happened to them since he’d slammed into Rooster’s rental car.

Wheland looked at Rooster dozing in the seat beside him. He looked so peaceful and connected to Wheland; with his hand resting on Wheland’s thigh, as if he needed the contact to make sure Wheland was close by. It wasn’t too long ago when Wheland would be sitting alone on the band plane and now it was hard to imagine a time when Rooster wasn’t beside him.

Wheland’s thoughts went back to their vacation again. He smiled at the promise Rooster made of teaching him how to fly fish on the lake in front of his cabin. Rooster claimed it was a dying art form, but Wheland wasn’t too sure about that. He’d never held a fishing rod in his life. Even still, the prospect of learning from Rooster excited him. Rooster also talked about the hiking they could do through the acres of woods surrounding his cabin, and the wildlife he would typically see. It all sounded relaxing and exactly what they both needed.

Wheland was in the middle of calculating what the water temperature of the lake might be this time of year in Vancouver when Tony tapped him on the shoulder.

“You got a minute?” Tony asked.

Wheland had not discussed the relationship he believed existed between Tony and Jared since the last conversation he’d had with Tony about it. Tony had made it clear he didn’t want Wheland sticking his nose into his personal business and Wheland was doing his best to respect that. Whatever was on Tony’s mind now seemed to be quite serious, judging by the intense look Tony had on his face.

Wheland glanced at Rooster, making sure he was soundly sleeping and comfortable, then he stood up from his seat to follow Tony to the back of the plane. They walked by most of the guys and all seemed to be in various stages of sleep like Rooster. Wheland took a seat across from Tony and set his ankle on his opposite knee.

“What’s going on?” Wheland asked.

It was hard to miss the jittery legs and nervous facial twitch Tony was displaying. Tony wasn’t into hard drugs, so Wheland knew he wasn’t high on something. Either Tony wanted a big-ass favor from him, or he’d done something he needed to apologize to Wheland for. Wheland began to run through the various reasons Tony might need to apologize, then he heard Tony clear his throat.

“You were right,” Tony said quietly.

Wheland was barely able to hear Tony’s voice above the roar of the Gulfstream engines.

“I was right about what?” Wheland asked. “I’m sorry, man, but you’ll need to fill in the blanks for me.”

Tony’s eyes darted to a snoring Jared sprawled across a couch in the next section of the cabin.

“Jared and me,” Tony said in a tone even more hushed than the first statement out of his mouth.

Wheland leaned forward. “What exactly do you mean about you and Jared?”

Tony fidgeted for one very long moment, until Wheland thought he was going to have to beat the answer out of Tony.

“I like him... you know,
like him
,” Tony said, and nearly choked on the last part of his confession.

Wheland almost felt bad for him. Tony seemed close to tears and it was enormously obvious discussing this was of monumental discomfort for him.

“When did you realize this?” Wheland asked Tony.

“Not long after the last time you brought it up,” Tony said.

“Have you done something about that?” Wheland asked.

Tony shook his head almost violently. “Fuck, no!”

“But, you want to?” Wheland asked.

Tony began to chew on a ragged fingernail. “No. I don’t know. Maybe,” Tony said. “Fuck! I’m so confused about all of this.”

Wheland snickered. “Well, I can see you’ve given this a lot of thought.”

Tony rolled his eyes and attempted to stand up to leave, but Wheland stopped him by latching on to his wrist.

“Sit down,” Wheland said, “You started this conversation and we’re going to finish it.”

“You give me any more shit and I walk,” Tony said.

“Agreed,” Wheland said. “I’m sorry about that, but it shocks me that you’re just seeing something I saw months ago.”

Tony shrugged and slumped back into the leather seat. “Not once in my life have I...”

“Been attracted to a dude?” Wheland said, finishing Tony’s statement.

“Nope, not once,” Tony said. “It makes no sense. Why now? Why... him?”

“I can’t answer that for you,” Wheland said. “But, it doesn’t always have to make sense. You two click. You’ve seen each other’s nasty habits and you still want to hang together. That’s all that matters.”

“Ain’t that the truth,” Tony said. “And, trust me when I say, he has some nasty habits.”

“I bet,” Wheland smiled and then he turned serious again. “So, what are you going to do about this?”

Tony sat back in his seat and pulled his long hair off his face using both hands. “I have no clue and I’m not even sure I want to do anything about it.”

“Can I ask you something else on the personal side without you freaking out?” Wheland asked.

Tony tipped his head and grimaced. “Depends on what it is, man.”

“Since we talked about this last time, have you crossed any lines with Jared?” Wheland asked. “I’m not looking for a blow-by-blow answer. A simple yes or no will do.”

“Blow-by-blow? Did you really just say that?” Tony asked, his face flushing more than it already was when they’d started this conversation. “I won’t go into specifics because I don’t think that’s fair to him, but let’s just say the lines were... accidentally blurred recently, and afterward he started acting weird around me.”

“Want some advice?” Wheland asked.

“I was hoping you might offer some,” Tony said.

“Blur the lines again... on purpose, and pay attention to his response,” Wheland said.

Tony shook his head. “I don’t know, man. I don’t want to do something to piss him off and ruin our friendship. I mean, we live together. If I fuck this up, and he walks out...”

“You share girls,” Wheland said. “Arrange another three-way and touch him. See what he does. Frankly, I can’t believe you’ve done as many threesomes as you have and not fucked around with each other. It’s kind of difficult for that
not
to happen in those situations.”

“Are you speaking from personal experience?” Tony chuckled.

Wheland nodded. “Yeah, I am. That’s how it happened for me in the beginning. Then, I started to realize how I needed the girls to be there less and less and craved the guys more.”

“Guys or one particular guy?” Tony asked.

“You don’t want to tell me specifics and I’m not going there, either,” Wheland said.

“Point taken,” Tony said.

“Do you have plans once we get home?” Wheland asked.

“Jared has been talking about possibly taking a trip somewhere, but I don’t know where,” Tony said.

“You’re not going with him?” Wheland asked.

“He hasn’t asked me,” Tony said.

“Maybe you should invite yourself,” Wheland said.

“Kinda pushy, isn’t it?” Tony asked. “Maybe he wants time away from me.”

“Doubtful,” Wheland said. “All I can say is don’t wait too long with this, or it will eat you alive. Explore it, see where it goes, and move forward. It doesn’t have to ruin a friendship or even a working relationship. Cooper and I managed to figure it out. You can, too.”

Tony nodded and rubbed his hands together. “You won’t tell anyone we talked about this, will you?”

“Of course not,” Wheland said. “Except for Rooster. We share everything, but it will go no further. You have my word.”

“Okay, cool,” Tony said and smiled. “Thanks, man.”

“Glad to help,” Wheland said and stood up from his seat. “Once we part ways in L.A., feel free to call me.”

Wheland squeezed Tony’s shoulder muscle and walked back to Rooster. He sat down beside his lover. Rooster’s head rolled to face Wheland’s seat. Wheland grinned at the serene look on the man’s face, then his fingers ran through the loose waves of hair at Rooster’s temple. Slowly, Rooster’s eyes fluttered open and a smile lit up his face making his eyes sparkle.

“Love you,” Rooster said.

“Me too, babe. More than you’ll ever know,” Wheland said.

Rooster pulled out of the rental car parking lot at the Vancouver International Airport. It was about an hour drive time to the cabin and the closer they got, the more nervous Rooster became. He had no reason for the nerves; maybe it was more nervous excitement? Even still, this was his personal sanctuary and Wheland would be the first person to see the inside of it. Sharing this part of himself meant something, and he knew without asking Wheland understood.

Rooster glanced across the car at Wheland; who was busy trying to make sense out of a map. The main problem being the fact Wheland had the map upside down, and watching Wheland attempt to refold it was even funnier.

“I don’t know where we are,” Wheland finally proclaimed.

“I do, and that’s all that matters,” Rooster said. He reached over and took Wheland’s hand.

“How much longer?” Wheland asked.

“Another eight or ten miles.”

Wheland nodded and looked out his side window again. “You really are out in the boonies here,” Wheland said.

“Close enough to civilization when it matters and far enough away to forget it exists,” Rooster said.

“We can run around naked like cave men?” Wheland teased.

“We can fuck right out in the open and no one will care,” Rooster said.