This looked very familiar. But it couldn't be. She must be dreaming.
One doesn't dream smells, however, and that smell was wonderful. Bacon. She
sat up and knew she wasn't dreaming. She was at the folly. But how?
The events of last night crept, one by one, back into her memory. She'd gotten a
message from Serenity. No, it wasn't signed, she'd just assumed it was from her. A hand
over her mouth, then someone put something over her eyes. A man gave her something
to drink. That was all she could remember.
Her heart began to beat a rapid tattoo as her situation became clear. Prentice had
kidnapped her! How dare he!
She jumped off the bed, an ill-advised idea, given the throbbing in her head. It
took her a moment to orient herself, but then the delicious aroma of bacon cooking
lured her out of the room.
As angry as she was, or should be, she couldn't help but laugh when she saw
Prentice, his back to her, at the stove.
Noting he wore a shirt and breeches, she said with a note of levity in her voice,
"Aren't you a bit overdressed?"
Looking over his shoulder, he answered, "I heard from a very reliable source that
it was unhealthy to cook bacon in the nude. I must say, it is much more comfortable this
way."
His electrifying smile sent frissons of anticipated pleasure through her.
However, she pushed the jocularity aside, allowing her anger to overtakem1 her
tongue. "What in hell am I doing here, Prentice Hyde?"
"I believe you are waiting for your breakfast, which shall be ready in a matter of
minutes."
"You know quite well what I mean."
"Might we speak of this when our stomachs are full? I don't know about you, but
I haven't eaten in ages."
"You kidnapped me."
"Yes, I most certainly did."
"Why?"
"After we eat."
Indeed, in a matter of minutes, he filled their plates with eggs, bacon, toast, and
fruit, washed down by steaming hot coffee. The coffee left much to be desired, but the
rest was amazingly good.
She was unabashed in her enthusiasm for the food, and ate like a starving
beggar. As she wiped her mouth on a linen napkin, she looked at his handsome
countenance and wished she weren't so angry with him.
Then, another thought played with her mind. Was she really angry? Was this
what she really wanted to happen? Before she allowed herself to absolve him of his
latest sin, she asked, "Why am I here?"
There was that contagious smile again. "You are here, my dear, because I wish
you to be."
"That is not an answer, and you know it. You kidnapped me. Stole me from the
club, drugged me, and brought me here. Why?"
"I am sorry about the drugging part, truly I am, but I knew you wouldn't come
willingly. You would have likely scratched poor John Coachman's eyes out given the
chance, so I thought it best to see you slumber while we traveled."
"You are incorrigible."
"So you've said on occasion."
"I thought my missive was quite plain, Prentice. This changes nothing."
"Yes, it will. I know why you sent the letter."
"I sent it because I don't wish to continue our arrangement."
"Liar."
"Excuse me?"
"You are lying. There is another reason."
Her face flushed. "How could you know that?"
"I know."
"How? Tell me."
"You'll hate me all the more."
She looked at him with steel in her eyes. With clarity of mind, she knew exactly
how. "Serenity told you?"
Trying to diffuse any culpability on Serenity's part, he said flippantly, "Not
exactly."
"Then
how
exactly?"
"You told me."
"I told you?" Then it hit her with the force of a fist to the gut. "You were listening
when I told Serenity."
He didn't acknowledge her reasoning but didn't deny it either. He simply looked
down at the empty plate in front of him.
Then another wave of reality washed over her. "You were in the viewing room
weren't you? You not only listened, but you saw everything."
His head still bowed, he raised his eyes to look at her through the partial shield
of his long eyelashes.
She jumped up and began to pace. "Oh, my god!" Embarrassment enveloped her.
"You'll pace yourself to exhaustion, Desiree. Please, let me explain."
"How can you explain yourself out of this? You invaded my privacy, Prentice
Hyde. Oh, my god! Was Serenity aware of this all along?"
"She's my friend and yours too. She wants only what you want,
your happiness
."
She'd never counted on Serenity betraying her. "She knew you were watching?"
With contrition, he nodded. "She did."
"She came to fetch me
not
out of her own concern but because you asked her to?"
"She
is
concerned for you, but I did ask her to convince you to come to the club.
She offered her services on her own, suspecting you might have need of them."
"Who took me from the club? I know it wasn't you because he talked to me."
"Lucien put the scarf over your eyes and secured your hands. It was my
coachman who put his hand over your mouth."
"His gloves smelled terrible. I'm sure they weren't clean."
"That
was
my number one priority." He chuckled, a most endearing sound,
despite the fact she was angry enough to slap him.
"What did he give me in the coach?"
"Just a drop of laudanum."
"I must have some time alone, and you must make arrangements to get me back
to London. I can't stay here like this."
"Like what? You were happy here, weren't you?"
"More than I want to think about, but that changes nothing."
"I won't let you leave. I've come this far as a criminal; I may as well hold you for
ransom."
"Ransom?" She laughed heartily. "There is no one in this world who gives a
damn if I live or die, Prentice Hyde."
"Yes, there is."
Chapter Nineteen
Desiree ran from the house. She didn't want to hear how Serenity cared about
her well-being. Prentice certainly wasn't about to profess undying love for her. He only
wished his sex partner would return to the fold. It was devastating to know that was
the extent of what she meant to him.
She walked for hours, crying. She screamed to the heavens about the unfairness
of her lot. She screamed until her voice cracked and her throat burned. She wanted
Prentice. She knew that, with a surety she'd never before possessed. She loved the way
he made her feel when they were in the throes of passion, but he also made her feel
good, even when they did something as simple as eat a meal together.
Was it enough to want him, knowing he wanted her for only one thing? But
didn't she want that one thing as well? She could forge a new arrangement with him,
going into it knowing her true feelings. How could she get hurt that way? At least she
would get out of the relationship what she wanted, which was his attentions. As
pathetic as it was, she needed what he gave her.
She had enough money to make a life for herself once he tired of her. Maybe, she
would tire first, leaving Lord Decadent to wander aimlessly without her, instead of the
other way around. She'd take from him, just as she had before, but this time she'd wring
him dry.
It was late afternoon by the time she found her way back to the folly. She saw
puffs of smoke from the chimney at a distance. It looked like a fairy tale. The little house
in the wood, tiny animals scurrying about, flowers everywhere, a real happily-everafter.
Resigned that it would only be a happy for now, she opened the door and
walked in, prepared to live for today, and let tomorrow take care of itself.
Indeed, a fire crackled in the grate, but Prentice wasn't in the room. She wouldn't
blame him if he'd left her for the manor house. She heated some water and took it into
the bedchamber. When she got there, however, the sight before her took her breath
away.
There were flowers everywhere, even petals sprinkled on the snow-white sheets.
Their scent was intoxicating. The warmth from the fire made the room cozy,
welcoming, homey. The blue curtains were open, the last vestiges of daylight weakly
filtering in.
Prentice sat in an overstuffed chair, looking as though he were fresh from his
bath. Dressed in his usual country attire of breeches, untucked shirt and boots, he was
the picture of the casual country squire. A book lay open across his lap, making Desiree
envious of said book.
"I've missed you," he said, his voice low and sultry.
"Have you?" Her voice sounded equally seductive.
"I'm sorry, Desiree."
"So am I." Determined to forge ahead with her new plan, she said, "I wish to start
over."
"How do we start over, Desiree?"
"We agree to the same arrangement we had before. I wish to fully submit to you,
Prentice, nothing more, nothing less."
"I see. You wish to have your little ass spanked, and then, I am to roger you
insensible, and that is all you want."
Fighting the urge to scream from the rooftops that she wanted so much more, she
simply nodded, lest he detect the lie on her tongue.
Prentice bit the inside of his cheek to keep from speaking the words he so
desperately wished to say. He loved Desiree more than he thought possible. He'd heard
her declaration of love for him, and it had torn through his black soul, making him
understand how empty his life had become.
He'd also heard her tell Serenity about his deplorable behavior. If he were to be
honest, the scene she described had been repeated innumerable times over the years.
Most times, he'd not even asked the young women's names before he flattered them,
turned their heads with implied promises he had no intention of keeping and then
seduced them. Before the young women knew what was what, he'd invade their most
private parts and steal their most precious gift. It was a pattern repeated more times
than he could count.
Shame burned like fire, to think how he'd changed the course of this beautiful
young lady's life without as much as a backward thought. He'd make it up to her, he
vowed. He owed her a debt, and if she'd allow it, he'd spend his life repaying it.
Afraid to push her into something she didn't want, he waited for her to speak
again. She poured the warmed water she was carrying in the basin, and began washing
her face and hands. She was still wearing the costume from the night before. It was
nothing more than lengths of silk draped over what he already knew was an enticing
body.
He loved that she was comfortable with varying degrees of nakedness, for if he
had his way, she would perpetually be in that state.
"I suppose we should talk, should we not?" he said.
"I suppose we should."
"I have not always acted in a fashion of which I could be proud, Desiree. As a
young man, I prided myself in the numbers of flirty, vacuous young women I could
take when they offered themselves so freely."
Quietly, she said, "I never offered anything."
"I confess, I must take your word and apologize for any presumption I may have
labored under. However, I can say without equivocation, I did not rape you."
"No, I never meant to insinuate otherwise. I gave myself to you willingly. Only
later did I realize what I had done, and how drastically my life was altered by that
single decision."
"I am sorry." He'd never meant anything more in his life.
"You didn't even remember me, Prentice. How empty the experience must have
been for you. It meant something to me. You were so handsome and charming. You
flattered me, kissed me until I was breathless. I was only eighteen years old, in my first
season. I wanted you to like me." Her voice cracked as a single tear streaked her
perfectly structured face.
"I cannot defend myself. I was every bit the lout you have always thought me to
be. I can only say I am not that man any longer."
"I've tried to tell myself that, honestly, I have. Do you know what I endured,
having to marry an old man, because the man I wanted to marry expected, wanted,
deserved a virgin?"
"I can't imagine. I am sure it was the worst kind of degradation."
"My name was ruined in society; my parents turned their backs on me. The man I
married never loved me or I him. The memory of the pleasure you showed me that
night made his rutting all the more unbearable. He drank and ignored me, then would
wake me and treat me like a whore. It was terrible."
She was crying in earnest now. He hoped she could release the horror of her past
and allow him to create a future for her that would make up for the despicable wrong
he had perpetrated upon her.
"Come." He motioned to her with his hands.
She shuffled toward him. When she was within reach, he pulled her onto his lap,
into his embrace.
He slid his hand up and down her back as she tucked her head into the crook of
his chin. She sobbed, mumbled unintelligible words, and clung to him. He comforted
her, trying to take away the pain she'd been living with for years. "I'll make it up to you,
Desiree, I swear I will."
Her hand came to rest upon his upper chest. He kissed her forehead, then her
nose, causing her to raise her gaze to meet his own. Very quickly, these innocent acts