Lord Toede (27 page)

Epilogue

Wherein final matters are sorted out, and Our Protagonist finally becomes Our Hero.
Flotsam was alive with celebration. The Lower City danced with pixie lights and
congratulatory fires. Most of the buildings wrecked in the battle were now the sites of
large bonfires, and smaller flames rose up from torchlight parades. Every now and again, a
magical illusion would stride across the sky, or a gnomish smoke-rocket would spiral up
over the city and burst in half a hundred streamers. Mobs milled in the streets as the
survivors partied and compared war stories. Were the tales to be truly believed, Toede had
wrestled bare-handed with the undead minions, while the rest of the population cowered in
their hiding places. In the main courtyard before Toede's (formerly Groag's) manor, gnoll
and kender and human mingled and bragged and drank. The defeat of the necromancer seemed
to have unified the races and dimmed more recent memory. The gnolls and kender were now
seen as rescuers, not invaders. Bunniswot was highly visible, encamped next to the
fountain, reading Toede's volume on government to three very interested young ladies.
Kronin wandered through the crowd, smiling, and if a piece of jewelry or a coin pouch
suddenly came loose in his proximity, he “found” it very quickly, then moved on. A large
fire had been built in the center of the court, and over it two huge oxen were spinning
slowly on iron spits, turned by gnolls. Groag stood on a slightly raised platform of green
wood and basted the rotating carcasses. He looked up toward the outer balcony and smiled,
raising his ladle in salute. Toede returned the salute with a heft of his mug and took a
long pull of the Jetties' best ale. The Jetties had survived both Jugger and the Undead
War, and instead of leveling it, the highmaster of Flotsam had proclaimed it official
alehouse of the Toede Restoration. Lord of Flotsam, he corrected himself. Ordained by the
pit itself, and recognized by the people. Let the dragon highlords argue with that. Toede
took another pull, his nostril hairs bristling at the scent of burned blood, which was not
coming from the ox1 roast. He did not turn around. “You've come at last,” he said. A
statement, not a question. Judith responded in her steely voice. “How are your injuries?”
Toede's entire side was bandaged, his left arm wrapped tightly to his body. “Several ribs
are cracked. One's pulled loose entirely and is nudging my lung. My shoulder's separated
in three places.” “Meaning?” asked the hell-maiden. “Better than usual,” said Toede. “A
priest of Shinare patched me up fairly well, and in exchange I gave him the part of town
where the whale landed to set up a church. So I get full-time healers and a clean-up job.”
She moved closer to the seated hobgoblin to observe the festivities, the flames reflecting
darkly off her polished skin. If any of the revelers saw a silver-skinned Abyss-spawn
chatting with the new Lord of Flotsam, they thought better than to mention it. Ever. “I've
been expecting you,” said Toede. “You've changed your mind?” Again, a question but phrased
politely. “No,” said the enforcer of Takhisis. “I gave my judgment and stand by it. You
have your life until someone else chooses to take it.” “Did you have the power to make me
a lord? Really?” asked Toede. “Did you have the power to make Rogate a knight? Really?”
responded Judith. “A Toedaic Knight,” corrected Toede, and forgetting his bad arm, he
tried to gesture to a tattered banner on the wall. “And chief bodyguard.” “And the
others?” said Judith. “Have you meted out suitable rewards and punishments?” Toede set
down his ale and ticked off things on his good hand. "Bunniswot has been made chief

historian and head scribe, since there has been a huge demand for Toede's Wisdom.' Kronin
has been made chief game warden, with Taywin as his assistant. The first thing they did
was deputize the entire kender clan. Charka has been officially recognized as the master
of the swamps and given access to the surviving libraries, while Renders has been made
chief librarian emeritus.“ ”They all tried to kill you,“ said Judith. ”Multiple times.“
”Yes, but better the devils you know,“ said Toede. ”Pardon the offense.“ ”None taken. And
Groag?“ ”He's become quite a decent cook in the past two years, so he will continue to
serve as my chef,“ said Toede, then added with a smile, ”He is also my food-taster.“ ”I
see,“ said Judith. ”Most suitable arrangements. Each gains what they desire, and the
responsibility that goes with it.“ Toede swore there was a hint of amusement in her voice.
He ventured, ”And what of your 'punishments'?“ ”The quality of enlightened mercy is
underdeveloped in the Abyss,“ said Judith. ”It turns out that Old Jugger was one shy of
his quota. So I had the Abbot and Castellan bound to a mile-wide expanse around a
near-empty landmark, and turned Jugger loose in that area.“ ”You think they can outrun
Jugger?“ said Toede. ”I think they are concentrating on outrunning each other,“ said
Judith dryly. There was a silence between the two, hobgoblin and hell-maiden. Then Toede
ventured a question. ”If you are not here to pull me back ... ?“ He let the question drag
out. ”I thought I should explain,“ said Judith quietly. ”About nobility.“ ”Am I noble?“
asked Toede. ”Do you feel noble?“ she responded. Toede thought for a moment ”No. At least
not in the terms of what I once thought was nobility: title, rank, prestige. And
definitely not in terms that everyone else talks about: honor, wisdom, kindness.“ ”Don't
worry. You are as black-hearted as they come. Your newfound nobility only provides a
larger array of resources and allies. If anything, you are more dangerous now than you
were when that dragon ended your first life,“ Judith said. Toede gave a sigh. ”I'm glad
you said that.“ The pair watched the mob swirl beneath them. ”If s not over yet,“ Toede
said. ”The necromancer's attack unified these people, and he is still out there.“ ”I do
not think that a major problem,“ said Judith. ”You know the near-empty location I spoke
of? The necromancer's castle was perfect for my needs, as zombies do not count in Jugger's
total.“ Another pause, broken by the distant howls of the gnolls. Judith put a silver hand
on his shoulder, and Toede jumped at the soft warmth. ”We look forward to your return to
the Abyss.“ Toede reached beneath his chair and pulled out a small silver tube. He turned
in his seat and presented the tube to Judith. ”This is?“ she said. ”A small scroll made
from the metal of the amulet you melted,“ said Toede. ”A souvenir of our encounter. It has
a full and accurate account of my accomplishments and actions, my strengths and desires,
and hopes for the future, in the hopes that I may be of service to you.“ Judith turned the
scroll tube over in her hands. It did not melt at her touch. ”What you're saying,“ she
said, with a hint of amusement, ”is that this is your resume?“ Toede smiled broadly. ”If
Abbot and Castellan are typical of your middle management, you need talented servants
badly. Just don't rush my recruitment." At that Judith broke into a smile, and out over
the city several gnomish skyrockets exploded at once, illuminating that silver smile into
a beacon that could be seen far out to sea. And deep within the Abyss, there was another
smile, one that threw new mountains upward and dislodged half a hundred fiends, as the
Dark Mistress herself was amused by what was to come.