Losing Control (2 page)

My phone began to vibrate,
bringing me back to the present. I grabbed it and wiped the tears from my eyes.

“Where are you? We’re ready to get this party started!” It was my best friend, Dana.

“Sorry, I’m running a little late. I had some last minute stuff at work, be there in ten minutes.” I tried to sound upbeat, funny how some hard memories could bring you down so quickly.

“Get on it, girl. There are hundreds of men waiting for us to show our tits at the concert tonight and we don’t want to keep them waiting!” Dana always knew what to say to get me in the concert-going party mood. I only lifted my shirt once at a concert and I was way beyond drunk. Dana, on the other hand, could barely keep hers on! She’d never been married and had only a couple relationships which lasted longer than a year, but she was a free spirit, very independent, owned a successful business, sexy and she knew it, and had helped me through some tough shit.

“Are the other girls ready?” I asked, referring to two of our other friends who were coming with us.

“Brittany is here and Jo just called, she’s filling up the motor home with gas and will be over to get us!” Dana said. Brittany was a twenty-nine year old blonde double-D who worked for Dana part-time. She was a lot of fun to be around, but not the sharpest pencil in the box. Jo lived next door to Lex and I for eight years and we became each other’s shoulder to cry on when our marriages were falling apart. She, unlike myself, got just about everything when she and Rick divorced, of course he was sleeping with a co-worker. So Jo was able to be a stay-at-home mom with their two kids.

“Pour me a glass of wine, I’ll be there soon!” I smiled as I hung up. I needed to let loose this weekend and have some fun. Maybe if I saw Jason I’d take him back to the motor home and show him I could do more than give head. Maybe I’d show my tits again, maybe, just maybe, I’d meet someone new.

Chapter 3

As Frank and I pulled up at Dana’s house, my stomach started again.
I’ve got to get something to eat soon.
It was like there were a hundred butterflies in there! I popped the trunk and grabbed my suitcase and overnight bag.

“Sweet ride!” Brittany yelled as she came bouncing across the lawn to greet me.

“Thanks,” I said as I pushed the lock button and stuck the keys in my purse. “He was a gift to myself when I got divorced. I’d always wanted another Camaro like I had in high school. His name is Frank.”

“You named your car?” Brittany sounded confused.

“Yes, and I talk to him sometimes, too.” I just wanted to confuse her a little more.

“Oh, okay then, let’s get your stuff in the motor home and hit the road!” she said as I saw Dana and Jo headed our way.

Dana already had herself all rocked out. She looked like that chick in the rock videos, the one who was sliding all over the car. Jo was a little more reserved, she was wearing blue jeans, a white tank, and a jean jacket. Brittany had her double-Ds shoved into a black lacy tank top that looked two sizes too small and Daisy Dukes that hugged her ass. She was younger than the rest of us, so the 80's hair bands look didn’t mean much to her, although she looked totally amazing and could probably snag any guy she wanted to, including the band members. I still had my office attire on, so I had to get ready on our two hour drive up to the festival.

Dana ran up and gave me a huge hug. “Hey, sweetie, how was your day?” I could tell she had started drinking.

“It was long. The whole building has Monday off though, some kind of inspection, so I have the next three days to relax!”

“Wow, that’s awesome for you. I know how hard you work and you totally need this! Brittany, grab Gia a glass of wine!” Dana could be so bossy; I could just imagine how she ordered Brittany around at work. Somehow she didn’t even seem to notice. She just bounced around following Dana’s orders, it was actually kind of entertaining.

Jo was double checking everything on the motor home. You could tell she was a mother of two, making sure all was taken care of so we’d have a safe trip. “Thanks so much for driving and letting us all shack up with you,” I told her as I put my stuff in the door.

“Absolutely!” she said. “I’m so excited for this, as much as I love taking care of the kids and all their stuff, I’m still a woman with needs, and I need a party weekend!” She gave me a wink and a hug.

Brittany showed up with my glass of wine and we all climbed up into the motor home. As I took my first sip, I couldn’t stop the butterflies from fluttering around in my stomach. Did it know something I didn’t about this weekend?

***

As we pulled out of the driveway, I began to change out of my dress, and with each article of clothing I took off, I felt myself getting further from my real life and closer to the life I was going to live this weekend.

I pulled on my button-fly jeans with intentional rips in them, my retro AC/DC t-shirt, which was thin and faded even though it was new, a belt with silver studs, short black leather boots with spike heels, and a worn black leather jacket. Then I applied black eyeliner, neat but thick, and ratted up my normally straight light brown hair. There, now I needed another glass of wine, a Marlboro red, and something to eat, and I was ready to rock.

As I made my way to the front of the motor home where Dana and Brittany were keeping Jo company as she drove, I was wondering to myself how we would all look on our way home on Sunday. What the mood would be, who would’ve gotten laid, who would’ve got puking drunk, who would’ve shown their tits to anyone and everyone. I smiled, this was going to be one fun weekend!

***

At eight o’clock we pulled into the huge campground that bordered the concert area. The place was packed with campers, tents, buses, vans, anything you could crash in and get a few hours sleep. I was so grateful for Jo and her motor home. She could maneuver it to go wherever she wanted and even backed it into our spot like a pro. Our spot, by the way, sixty-nine, made me think of Jason and what I may do to him later. I’d finished my third glass of wine and drunken horniness was setting in. I’d better get something to eat.

“Who’s hungry?” I asked, hoping someone else hadn’t eaten yet.

“Starving!” Jo said, “And then I need to start drinking to catch up with all of you!”

We had all pitched in and Jo went shopping during the week for food and beverages and stocked the fridge and two coolers. We decided on sandwiches and raw veggies so we didn’t have to waste time cooking. Dana and Brittany said they had already eaten, but I was pretty sure they just wanted to check out who was camped next to us. Plus, eating would’ve ruined their buzz and they were definitely buzzed.

“We’re going to wander out while you two are eating, be back in fifteen minutes,” Dana called as they were almost knocking each other down to get out the door.

Jo and I just relaxed, ate our dinner and visited about the bands we were most excited to see this weekend. She was such a beautiful woman, inside and out, and I felt really lucky to have had her in my life while Lex and I were having so many issues, and to have her in my life still. While she chatted, I made her a double vodka tonic and cleaned up.

We decided to set up our chairs outside on our little lawn and wait for the girls to get back. “I knew they wouldn’t be back in fifteen minutes,” I said as I settled into my chair and lit a cigarette. It was all good though, we had plenty of time to get to the arena before the ten o’clock concert kicked off the rock festival. We were completely content watching the passersby, checking out all the hot guys, visiting with a few of them as they stopped to say hi and check us out, I supposed. People watching at those types of venues was so entertaining, there were all kinds. We saw a sixty plus year old man in a Speedo, a topless gal with body paint, which looked like a bikini top, and a clown, yes, literally a clown!

About 9:15 p.m. Dana and Brittany returned, so we all grabbed whatever we needed and headed to the shuttle that would drive us over to the arena. While we waited, I couldn’t help but fixate on a couple beside me who were having the most erotic make-out session I had ever seen in public. The pleasantly plump, yet beautiful girl was riding the dude’s leg like she was on one of those spring horses and he was sticking his tongue so deep into her mouth I was sure she was going to gag up something any moment. Even though it was disgusting and even a little disturbing, it was totally turning me on and I couldn’t look away. As their rhythm picked up, my breathing picked up. Luckily the shuttle arrived or I may have passed out.

When we got on the shuttle, I was relieved the couple sat in the back so I couldn’t see them anymore.

“Geez, Gia, you were really getting into the porn show out there!” Dana blurted.

“Yeah, you have
got
to get laid,” Brittany chimed in.

My face turned red but I smiled because I knew they both had valid points.

“Leave her alone, she lives a pretty sheltered life,” said Jo, knowing that my day consisted of work, going to the gym a few days a week, a frozen dinner, and maybe a date with my vibrator before bed if I wasn’t too tired.

“I wanted to look away,” I whispered, “but I couldn’t. It was like the time Dana wore those hideous hot pink shiny pants to the fair, very entertaining.”

We all laughed, even Dana. She was a good sport and she realized a couple days later how ridiculous she had looked.

The shuttle pulled up to the gate and we all glanced at each other, grinning, ready to start our weekend.

Chapter 4

After entering the gate and trading in our tickets for wristbands, we decided to get drinks. There were little bars set up all around the arena, along with t-shirt shops, tattoo and piercing joints, and eateries. We grabbed our first round, made a toast to the weekend and watched through a Plexiglas wall as a chick was getting a little rose tattoo on her shoulder.

“We should all get matching tattoos!” said Brittany excitedly, “Or maybe belly button rings!” She was still young enough to want those things, but the rest of us agreed it wasn’t going to happen, no matter how drunk we got.

We heard the announcer getting ready to introduce the first band, so we made our way to the crowd of thousands in front of the stage.

“Do you wanna have a good time?” the announcer yelled into the microphone. The crowd went wild.

“I said do you wanna have a fucking good time?” he screamed again. The crowd roared louder. I got goose bumps and those butterflies were back.

“Here they are—Trixter!” The crowd exploded as the four band members ran out on stage and started belting out one of their biggest hits. Everyone, including the four of us, began singing along and dancing. It didn’t take long for some guys to come over and start dancing with us. The one I got stuck with was about six and a half feet tall and reeked of skunk. I was checking out Dana’s dance partner, nice ass, tan, muscular guy with really white teeth, she seemed pretty happy. Jo and Brittany were more so dancing with each other and the guys around us seemed pretty happy about watching that. I had to get away from this skunky dude, so I grabbed Dana to head to the restroom and get another round. She told White Teeth she’d be right back and he winked at her.

“I’ll be looking for a new dance partner when we get back,” I told Dana. “That guy is giving me a headache.”

“Mine will do for now,” said Dana, “until someone better comes along.” She smiled a devilish smile. “I can tell he’s a little too straight-laced for me!”

The bathrooms looked like porta-potties, but when you entered them they were much nicer, they even flushed. They had attendants who went in and wiped down after each person came out and there was soap, hot water, towels, and hand sanitizer by the entrance. They were also separated, men’s and women’s, although I think the men’s actually were porta-potties. As I walked out of mine, I happened to glance across to the men’s and there he was—Jason. My butterflies were back.

He didn’t see me right away, so I followed him to the sinks, came up behind him, and whispered right behind his ear, “I saved you a dance.”

He swung around so fast he almost knocked me over. “Hey, gorgeous!” he said and gave me his usual peck on the cheek. It felt so good to see him. He looked amazing in his faded jeans and Crüe shirt, which emphasized his muscles, and those lips—yummy! The smell of him made me start to salivate. I was so relieved to have run into him, now I didn’t have to dance with Skunky anymore!

Dana walked up. “Hey, Jason, you’re just in time to buy us a drink,” she teased.

Jason laughed. “Of course I would love to, but, uh, I’m kind of with someone tonight. Sorry, Gia. I would’ve loved to get that dance—maybe another time, okay?” Just like it was no big deal, like I was just any girl, no one special. My heart sank, the butterflies flew away.

“Sure,” I said, trying to mask my heartbreak. I wanted to say, “Please don’t go, be with me tonight. I need you, I’m lonely and horny and you have been in my thoughts since I saw you in the garage, what about the ‘unfinished business’ we have?” But I didn’t, of course.

“Have fun girls, and be careful. There are a lot of drunk guys out there tonight,” and he was off.

I felt like an idiot. Here I’d been thinking of running into him, dancing with him, touching him, kissing him, even fucking him this time, and he’s “kind of with someone tonight.”
What the hell does that mean, anyway? He ran into some bimbo up here and knows she’s a sure thing, so she trumps me? Screw him, he’s nothing but a he-whore, even though he makes me feel so good when he calls me gorgeous and touches me every time he sees me, screw him!

Dana could tell my mood had drastically changed. “Gia, what’s wrong?”

“Let’s get a drink; I’m fine,” I said.