Love & Hate (Book One: Hate) (7 page)

“
Can I ask you a question?” He asks out of nowhere bringing me out of my lustful day dream.

“
Sure.” I am super curious as to what he is going to ask me.

“
Do you love Jasper?” He asks bluntly.
Whoa, that was out of left field! How am I going to answer this?

“
That’s not really your business.” I say trying to deflect the question.

“
No it’s not my business but I asked you anyways.” He says not caring I am totally freaking out.
Okay, I’m just going to tell him the truth and see if that appeases him.

“
I love Jasp but I’m not in love with him.” I say staring out the window.

He looks over at me and I turn to meet his eyes, he doesn’t say anything in response just gives me a curt nod. I have no idea what that was about. I assume he is trying to see if I’m just stringing his friend along and is looking out for him.

After a while we fall into an easy rhythm of chatting and listening to the radio. We talk about our majors and our goals for the future. I tell him how I have always wanted to be an attorney and plan to attend law school after I graduate. He shares with me how his major is in agricultural education but that it isn’t necessarily his dream career path. He tells me how he wants to build hotels, which totally surprises me. In a million years I would have never guessed he would want to do something like that. After listening to him talk I can tell he is really passionate about it. I know though he will give it all up to return home and help his family. We discuss his family’s hay company and their farm. He tells me about the plans he has to help grow the company further than their current regional buyers. I instantly understand how smart and driven he is. It makes me happy for him because I know he will be successful in whatever he chooses to do. As I listen to him talk I begin to realize I have completely underestimated him.
Cutter has the complete ability to steal my heart regardless of whether my feelings are reciprocated.

“
Paige, wake up. We are here.” Cutter whispers softly. I am in the middle of the most delicious dream starring the one and only, Mr. Cutter Daniels. Things were just getting interesting when I feel someone trying to gently shake me awake. I moan and try to snuggle back into the corner of the passenger seat.

“
You need to wake up darling.” Well, that settles it, I’m still dreaming because Cutter would never be caught dead calling me darling. The only endearment he has ever uttered to me is Piggy Princess. Just to make sure I am actually dreaming I squint my eyes open to find him staring right back at me with a predatory smile on his face. He is leaning over the center console and has his hand gently rests on my arm. Holy hell, I hope I wasn’t talking in my sleep. I can feel my cheeks turning fire engine red. I quickly avert my eyes looking at the floor in the truck.

“
I’m sorry. How long have I been asleep?” I finally mutter.

“
You fell asleep about two hours ago.” He says with that grin still plastered on his face.

“
Oh, I hope I didn’t bother you.” I say embarrassed.

“
You didn’t bother me Paige, but you may have distracted me.” He says quickly as he gets out of the truck. We are parked at our dorms. I guess I have really been out of it. I hadn’t even noticed we pulled off the highway. Cutter carries my bags for me as we walk toward the dorms main entrance.

“
Well thanks for the ride. I had a good time.” I tell him as I try to grab my bags from him. I need to get away from him so I can rehash this horribly embarrassing moment we just shared.

He refused to relinquish my bags and says “I’ll bring them to your room for you.”

“
Okay, thanks.”
This is all so weird.

When we arrive at my room I open the door and he proceeds to go inside and deposit my bags in the middle of the floor. But instead of leaving he continues to just stand there. I stand by the door awkwardly not knowing what to do or say.

“
I want you to know something Paige.” Cutter says as he looks toward the window across from him.

“
Uh … Okay, what?”
What the heck is he doing? What does he want me to know?

“
We shouldn’t hang out.” He says coldly still refusing to look at me.
Welcome back Mr. Moody pants. We were having a perfectly nice time and now he has to ruin it. Great! I’m pissed and way too tired to deal with his craziness.

“
Fine, whatever”

He finally turns to look at me. “It’s for the best.”

“
Yeah I’m sure it is. Well thanks for the ride and brining my bags up to my room.” I am attempting to play this cool but my hurt is coming out.
Maybe he would just take a hint and leave so I can mentally obsess over everything that has just transpired.

“
You will see.” He says and then just walks out closing the door behind him. I stand there for a long time, frozen from the complete shock of what just happened. I should move, go unpack or call Tess but I can’t. I feel numb. I don’t know why this is so upsetting because it wasn’t like we were great friends to begin with; heck we were more like mortal enemies. I guess I just had hope, and hope is not something you should have when dealing with a complete asshole like Cutter Daniels.

CHAPTER 7

I have been at school almost a month and I love it. My classes are challenging but I enjoy them. It took me a while to get into a grove of studying. The first week I felt totally lost and was stressed that I was the only one feeling that way. But by my second week I started using the study tutors at the sorority, which really helped me get my barring’s. I am becoming more thankful every day I joined a sorority. It is nice to have people to sit with in class and study with after. I can see now that the sorority is more than just a social organization; it is more like an instant support network.

I have also become increasingly close with Millie, the red headed girl I shared a ten with on the raft trip. Millie is probably the funniest person I have ever met and for sure one of the most genuine. Millie is stunningly gorgeous. I tell her all the time she looks like Nicole Kidman but she just scoffs at me in denial. Millie doesn’t care what people think about her, she is utterly carefree. We are constantly getting in trouble at chapter meetings and at study tables for laughing. We have a blast together. Millie gets me. She understands I’m not carefree like her and she has accepted this as a challenge. She is insistent that I need to just calm my ass down and let things be, or at least that’s what she is always telling me. I know I’m lucky to have made such a good friend in her.

I decided to confide in her about my Cutter Daniels experience. She listened to the whole story never interrupting or judging me and at the end she looked at me and told me I simply had two choices; sleep with him or slap him in the face. This made me double over in laughter, thinking she was joking. But no, she was dead serious. She didn’t seem to promote either choice but she is fully convinced Cutter has some sort of feelings for me, what feelings she doesn’t know.

I don’t know either. I have thought a lot about the things that have happened. I keep going over in my head the entire ride home with him. How we seemed to have come to some non-verbal agreement to be friendly with one another and put the past behind us. It makes no sense how we could go from talking about our career goals and life dreams for hours to not being able to be friends in a single instant. I also keep thinking about how I thought I heard Cutter call me darling when he was trying to wake me up. I’m guessing that is all just in my head. I must have dreamt it. But whatever the truth is, it doesn’t matter. I haven’t seen or heard from him in over a month.

I hear a knock on my door. It is Monday morning and I am just headed out for my ten o’clock class. I look through the peephole and I see Katie One’s ridiculously bright smile staring back at me. I open the door.

“
What’s up, Katie?”

“
Good morning Paige. Hey I was just coming back from my class and I saw there was a sweater folded up with a note with your name on it in front of your door. I didn’t want anyone to steal it so I thought I would let you know it was out here.” She says looking cheerful as always.

“
Oh thanks.” She hands me the sweater.

“
No problem. Happy Monday!” She says back at me before I close the door.
How anyone can be that peppy all the time blows my mind.

I look down at the note confused. It is from Cutter.

Cutter had been outside my door this morning? I hadn’t even noticed I lost my sweater. I wonder where he found it. Maybe it had fallen down behind his seat or something. It was nice of him to return it.

As I’m walking to my class my phone rings with a number I have memorized by heart but have refused to program in my phone. I answer it saying “hello.”

“
Hey Paige.” He says coolly. There is just something about that voice that makes my blood rush threw my head making me feel dizzy. I stop walking so I concentrate on the ensuing conversation.

“
Hi. Who is this?”
Why did you do that? You know that is going to piss him off!

“
You know who this is Paige.” He says completely unaffected.
Crap, he totally saw through my little game.

“
Cutter? Oh hey, what’s up?”
Smooth recovery Paige.

“
I just wanted to see how you were doing and make sure you found your sweater this morning.”
Umm… totally weird. Okay, don’t freak out, just answer like you don’t care at all.

“
Yes I did. Thanks. How are you?”
Good, deep breath. You got this girl!

“
I’m fine. Hey, I need a favor.”
Interesting, Mr. We Can’t Hang Out needs a favor. What in the bloody hell could he possibly want?

“
What is it?” I am totally curious now.

“
I know your prelaw and well I have to take business law 200 and I’m kind of struggling with it. I was wondering if you might help me understand some of the concepts.”