Love Inspired May 2015 #2 (13 page)

Her head tilted. “So you think my mother just wants to apologize?”

“Sounded like it to me.”

She pulled in a deep breath, then let it out slowly. “Then I'll
consider
calling them.”

He smirked. “You're as good at playing with words as I am.”

“Hey, I learned from a master, my mother, a society belle with a gilded tongue.”

“She sounded genuine on the phone.”

“Don't let her suck you in.”

Moving closer, he slid the purse off her shoulder and set it on the entry table. Then he took her warm, small hand and threaded his fingers through hers, the gesture so intimate he wasn't sure she'd tolerate it.

Again, her big hazel eyes widened. Thankfully, she didn't move away.

“Violet, have you ever considered that maybe your mother has changed? That maybe she and your father love you and want to reestablish a relationship?”

“I'll consider the possibility. That's as far as I can go at the moment.”

He nodded. “Okay, I won't push.” He brushed his thumb over her thumb. “You haven't said you forgive me.”

Her shoulders relaxed. Leaning closer, she gazed at him, eyes playful, vibrant. “I'll consider it.”

With a chuckle, he lifted her chin. He wanted to kiss her. Badly. But he feared it was too soon. She didn't even trust him enough to share more than superficial things about her parents.

Instead, he smoothed his finger across her soft cheek. Then he took hold of her other hand so that they faced each other, fingers locked. “I won't let you go until you say you forgive me.”

“Okay, okay. I forgive you,” she said with a laugh.

“Good. Now, please don't forget to drop by and check out Kelli's babysitting abilities so I can rest easy.”

“You can count on me.”

“Thanks.” He begrudgingly let go of her hands. “We'll talk later.”

Regret gnawed at him as he returned home. She was able to do him a favor because business was slow. A few unkind words here and there had hurt her practice. Venting to friends of his aunt and uncle had probably caused the spread of rumors.

If Violet wouldn't let him help with her parents, then maybe he could help with her practice.

He'd make a few phone calls. Would quietly get word out that Violet Crenshaw was a great doctor and a much better person than he'd thought before meeting her. Violet was a good woman, generous, dedicated, fun. A woman he was growing to care deeply about.

And that was the honest truth. No wordplay needed.

* * *

“So what's up with you and Jake?”

Startled by Hillary's question, Violet froze with her hand on the menu. “Not a thing. I've just been wearing my doctor's hat, helping him with Abby. I even trained one of his babysitters on Wednesday.”

The receptionist, wearing brightly patterned, kid-friendly scrubs that she'd worked in that day, gave a snort. “Uh-huh.”

At her doubtful tone, Violet jerked her gaze to the woman. However, Hillary focused on running her finger down the plastic-coated menu of Edna's Diner.

Edna darted their way. “What're y'all having, ladies? I've got some nice fried catfish for my Friday night special. And also smothered chicken,” she drawled, the
smother
sounding like
smuthuh
, just as Violet's mother always said it.

The quick memory jabbed at her heart—made tender by Jake's revelation the other day.

“I'll have the meatloaf. My regular,” Hillary said with a smile as she handed over her menu.

“And I'll try the smothered chicken.”

Edna rushed away to place their order.

Time to get to the point of their meeting. “Hillary, I need your advice.”

The woman, who'd worked for Paul and Edith for more than ten years, leaned her arms on the table and focused on Violet, all teasing gone. “Gladly.”

“I know we've had a good week—or at least a good
end
of the week—patient-wise.”

“Yeah. Felt busier than usual.”

“But I'm still concerned. I'm considering closing one day a week to help save on utilities and payroll.”

Hillary hesitated but didn't look surprised. “That could be smart. But it could also be inconvenient for patients, so we might lose more.”

She sighed. “That's why I wanted to run the idea by you, since you have so much experience in a medical office. And because you'd lose a day's pay.”

“Have you done anything else to get your name out there?”

Violet brightened, glad she had good news on that front. “Actually, I have. I've volunteered to teach the parenting class at the hospital. I'm going to speak to the elementary school PTO. And I've got a call in to the director of the hospital to offer my services doing rounds in the newborn nursery.”

“Sounds like you'll make a lot of connections. Maybe wait a little longer before you cut back. I don't mind giving up a day a week if it would help. You can answer the phones and check patients in.”

“Seriously? You'd be willing to do that?”

“Look, I'm sure it'll be temporary. Trust me, business will pick up once you put yourself out in the community. In fact, I overheard two women talking in line at the bank at lunchtime today.”

Violet's stomach sank. She groaned.

Hillary put her hand on Violet's arm. “No, it was good. One told the other she'd been hearing good things from her contractor. Said she had already made an appointment for her children for a well visit. The other said she was tired of driving so far to see their pediatrician and would do the same.”

Heaving a sigh of relief, Violet leaned back in her chair. “Maybe we're going to make it.”

With a reassuring squeeze, Hillary gave a firm nod. “Oh, I know we will.”

Violet covered Hillary's hand. “Thank you. You've been a huge help—as usual.”

“Seems you've been a huge help to Jake.”

At the abrupt change of subject, Violet shook her head, smiling. “I told you, Abby's my patient.”

Hillary held her gaze, searching. Desperately afraid Hillary would see how much she already cared about Jake, Violet glanced away.

“Violet, honey, there's nothing to be ashamed about if you're feeling more. Jake's a good guy.”

With her face burning, Violet fiddled with the sugar and pink sweetener packets. “I know he is.”

With a sympathetic expression, Hillary leaned closer. “He had a rough childhood, you know. But he never let losing his parents get him down. He took care of Remy like she was his own sister. Tried his best to keep her out of trouble. I'm not a bit surprised he's stepped up to care for Abby.”

Exactly as Violet had discovered. Jake was an honorable man. A man who wanted to do the right thing. Who even wanted to help reunite her family.

But would he commit to Violet as he'd committed to Abby? More than anything, she wanted to trust him. But could she really after what Simone had said about him not wanting to marry?

“He's a handsome man with a thriving business,” Hillary added, a sly smile tilting one corner of her mouth. “A real catch. You'd be crazy not to be interested in dating him.”

Violet couldn't help but laugh at Hillary's sales pitch. “Oh, we don't have anything romantic going on.”

“Uh-huh,” she said, just as she'd said earlier.

Hillary's cell phone buzzed. She pulled it out of her purse and checked the screen. “Excuse me for a minute. I need to take this.” She slipped out of the booth and glanced back over her shoulder. “Just know that you can't go wrong with Jake West.”

Nothing romantic going on? What about in her entry hall the other day? Jake had entwined his fingers with hers, his touch tripping her pulse. When he'd brushed his fingers across her face, her heart had soared, and she'd thought he might pull her close. Then he'd tilted her chin upward, his gaze on her lips as if he wanted to kiss her, and she'd held her breath in anticipation, wanting him to. Wanting it so badly she nearly closed the space between them herself.

Violet realized she was once again holding her breath and huffed the air out. Fanned herself with her napkin. Honestly, she needed to get hold of her vacillating emotions.

He
hadn't
kissed her, though. Even though she'd looked up at him as if starving for his kiss. He'd had every opportunity to claim her lips with his. But instead, he'd simply pushed for forgiveness.

Why? He'd sure seemed to
want
to kiss her. Something was holding him back. Maybe a fear of commitment? The man had suffered great loss in his childhood, had struggled to please his aunt and uncle. And now, with getting attached to Abby while wondering whether or not Remy would return, he risked major heartbreak again.

Maybe he simply didn't have room for Violet in his life.

If she knew what was good for her, she'd ignore Hillary and forget silly notions of romance.

Chapter Nine

J
ake picked up Abby from where she had spent some time lying on a blanket on her stomach. He nuzzled her neck and brought her sweet hand to his mouth to kiss it.

Tiny fingernails scratched the corner of his mouth. “Ouch, baby girl. Your nails need to be cut.” And no one was around to help.

Maybe the task would be easier after a bath, when her nails would be softer.

“Come on, sweet thing.” Carrying her in the crook of his arm, he went to the bathroom in search of the baby toiletry kit that included clippers and scissors.

He located both and inspected the miniature tools. How could something so small feel so intimidating? Give him a chainsaw any day.

Imagining snipping the nearly microscopic nails growing close to Abby's delicate skin made him break out in a cold sweat. No way would he attempt something that could draw blood.

He pulled out his phone. Even though it was eight o'clock on a Friday night, he hit Call on Violet's name.

On the third ring, she picked up. “Hey.”

“I need help.”

“What's wrong?” she asked with a note of panic in her voice.

“Itsy-bitsy razor-sharp baby fingernails. Gigantic nail clippers.”

She laughed. “They make infant nail clippers, you know.”

“Those are the ones I'm talking about. How soon can you come?”

Silence.

“I'm sorry. Do you have plans?”

“No plans. I'll be right over.”

“We'll be in the bathroom doing the bath routine. Come on in the back door.”

Jake gathered everything he needed, then filled the baby tub and placed it on the counter. He slipped Abby in the warm water and began washing her. What had been a dreaded chore two weeks ago had begun to feel like a bonding ritual. Maybe because she didn't scream through it anymore.

Abby kicked her feet a little, almost as if she were enjoying bath time now.

“You two look like you're having fun.” Violet stood in the doorway wearing running shorts and an old T-shirt. The duo seemed to be her go-to nonwork outfit. That and her flip-flops.

“I love seeing you in your regular clothes.”

“My mother never abided lounging clothes. So now I wear them whenever I get the chance.”

Trying to imagine the serious doctor bucking authority, he grinned. “Ever the rebel, huh?”

“So where are the clippers?” she asked, avoiding talking about her past.

“In that zippered bag.”

Violet dug inside and pulled them out. “Here, let's get those vicious nails off.”

She leaned around him while he finished rinsing Abby's legs. Pressed up against his side, she lifted Abby's tiny hands and carefully, yet confidently, snipped off the tips of the fingernails with the clippers.

He breathed in the scent of Violet's shampoo, relished the feel of her warmth against his shoulder. “Wow. You're a pro. I would have taken forever and would have been terrified of hurting her.”

She lifted his hand, then held up the tiny clippers beside his fingers. “No contest. And I don't think those sausage fingers will fit in the scissors, either.”

Having her close made his chest feel tight. “Guess I'll just have to call you to come over for each nail trim.”

“Anytime.” She brushed soap bubbles off Abby's cheek. “How's my girl doing today?”

“She had a good day with Kelli.” He grabbed a plastic cup and filled it with fresh water. “Want to help me wash her hair? She doesn't usually cooperate as well on this part.”

“Dry her off and wrap her up. I'll show you an easier way to do it.”

He did as told. Then Violet took Abby from him, holding the bundled up baby along the underside of her left forearm with Abby's head cupped in her palm. She held her over the sink.

As she used her right hand to scoop warm tap water over Abby's hair, he stepped in to see better.

“See, she's totally secure, and the water is nice and warm. Secure and warm equals happy baby.” She smiled up at him, and he realized he'd quit watching the demonstration. He was watching the beautiful, gentle pediatrician. The warm, generous woman.

Secure and warm equaled happy man, too.

Slipping his arm around her waist—his contribution to the hair-washing—he pushed Violet's wispy dark hair behind her ear.

“Jake, watch what I'm doing. You'll be able to do this until she gets too big.”

Forcing his attention back to Abby, he tried to concentrate.

Scoop water. Lather. Rinse.

Abby lay there totally content, dark hair slicked to her head, blue eyes wide open, looking at them both as if they were this perfect family of three.

“All done.” Violet finished rinsing, then pulled up a corner of the bath towel to dry Abby's head.

“I think I can manage trying that next time,” he said. “Thanks.”

Wrapped in Violet's arms, Abby yawned, and her eyes grew heavy.

Jake rubbed the tightness from his chest. He hated for Violet to leave so soon, and he had a feeling she might like to be involved in more than the bath. “Bottle and bedtime. You want to do the honors?”

She blinked. Nodded.

“How about you get her diapered and dressed while I make the bottle?” he said.

“I'll be happy to.”

“I guess you know where everything is. A clean sleeper is on the bed.”

While preparing the formula, Jake took his time moving around the kitchen. Slowly, deliberately, he opened the can and poured it in the bottle. Soon, Abby would fall asleep and they'd put her in the bed. Then he would be alone with Violet.

He wanted to kiss her. It was all he'd been thinking about for days.

But he shouldn't.

His aunt and uncle didn't trust her, though they didn't know her as well as he did.

She was secretive and wouldn't open up to him, even after he'd shared about himself.

Plus, she'd made it perfectly clear she was focused on her career.

He was crazy for getting sucked in to the coziness. Especially when Remy could come back tomorrow and shatter the bond the three of them had formed.

“Jake, she's ready and about to fall asleep.” Violet stood in the doorway of the kitchen, contentment shining in her beautiful hazel eyes, Abby cradled in her arms.

“Here you go.” He held out the bottle to her. “I don't have a nice rocking chair, but Uncle Paul's old lounger in the family room has done the trick.”

“Sounds perfect.” She smiled as she shifted Abby to one arm, yet her expression was full of longing. Maybe she felt the bond as strongly as he did.

Determination settled fully into his bones. Tonight, if they got to know each other better, if she would open up to him even a little or give any hint that she'd started to trust him...he
would
kiss her.

* * *

With her hand trembling, Violet took the bottle from Jake.

Why was she shaking so?

Why, my eye. I'm shaking because he keeps staring at my lips. Because he's standing so close I can see that his blue eyes have a dark blue ring around them that's almost purple.

I'm shaking because after we put Abby to bed, I want to beg him to quit looking at me like I'm a tasty morsel and just kiss me already.

Violet escaped the tension by darting to the living room and settling in the worn leather recliner. Touching the nipple to Abby's lips, she roused the baby.

Jake sat nearby on the dark green tweed couch, arms resting on his knees, watching Abby eat.

Once again, Violet felt as if they were a normal family, taking care of their own child. Warm and cozy herself, Violet relaxed. Sighed.

“You seem happy.” Jake reached over and stroked Abby's head.

“I love holding this precious child.”

“Me, too. With having child care and getting back to work nearly full-time the last couple of days, Abby and I have finally found a rhythm.”

“So Kelli and Simone worked out okay?”

“Yeah. Between the two of them, they had the babysitting covered. I realized I was probably being overly concerned.”

“That's normal. Most parents are that way with first children.”

He leaned against the back of the couch and scraped a hand across his beard. “I want to adopt her.”

Her heart fluttered, like delicate wings battering against stifled hope.

Yet Jake's simple statement was fraught with what-ifs. She had to tread carefully. “Do you think maybe you need to give Remy more time?”

“I've been emailing her daily, sending photos, begging to meet with her. She hasn't responded since that first time through the director.”

Abby's eating had slowed, yet she continued sucking on the bottle.

“You're assuming the director of the shelter is passing along your messages,” Violet said.

“I confirmed with Ms. Phillips that Remy has received all my messages. If she hasn't contacted me yet, I don't think she will.”

“Well, you know her better than anyone else does.”

Jake stuck his pinkie finger in Abby's palm, and she gripped it. The sight of a big man hand nestled with a tiny baby hand brought tears to her eyes.

“I can understand wanting to make a clean break from Abby if that's Remy's final decision,” he said. “But why won't she meet with just me? Though I've been denying it, my gut says either she's in an abusive situation, or she's on drugs again. If that's the case, I can't keep waiting for her to show up. I have to permanently protect Abby.”

“I'm sorry, Jake. The thought of Remy choosing drugs over her baby is unimaginable.”

“When addiction takes control, it's excruciating to watch.”

Especially when, according to Hillary, he'd been the one protecting her all those years. In the back of her mind, though, she wondered... “So you don't think there's any chance she brought Abby to you because she felt overwhelmed and ill equipped to care for a child?”

“If that were the case, I think she would have missed Abby enough to come back by now.”

Violet kissed the baby's forehead, breathing in her powdery baby shampoo scent. “I'd like to give Remy the benefit of the doubt, but whatever the reason, I guess she made her choice.”

“Like you made your choice about severing ties with your family?”

The sudden change of topic hit her in the solar plexus, leaving her off balance. Could she keep the conversation out of personal territory? “Yes, I did.”

“Why?”

She'd lived her whole adult life without anyone knowing the full truth. Sad to admit, but no one really knew her at all.

Looking into his kind eyes, she wanted to tell him, to share at least some of her past. She sensed he wouldn't judge her, not harshly anyway.

“My parents let me down when I needed them most. They hurt me terribly.”

Abby's mouth had grown slack, and the bottle nipple slipped out. Violet set the uneaten ounce of formula down and placed the baby on her shoulder, patting gently to burp her.

“I'm sorry,” Jake said. “Did they fail to support you becoming a physician?”

“Oh, they supported my career aspirations—at the expense of everything else. By the time I left for college, I was so angry I broke off ties. I put myself through college and medical school.” With Abby pressed to her chest, she ached for the times she'd missed with her own child. If only she'd been strong enough, selfless enough, to give up her career goals and keep her baby no matter what her parents wanted.

As Abby's eyes closed, Jake stood and held out a hand to Violet.

Her heart pounded as she put her hand in his. He helped her up, then ushered her to Abby's bedroom.

Violet laid the girl in the travel bed. “Looks as if you may need to buy a real crib soon.”

“It's on my list to do this weekend.” He tucked loose edges of the receiving blanket underneath Abby. “I kind of feel like buying something permanent will make good things happen. And of course, I'm trying to trust God in the situation.”

Violet crossed her arms tightly in front of her. “Yeah, I've been trying, too, for the first time in a long time. And not doing too well at it.”

The room was small, dimly lit, intimate. His tender smile left her feeling vulnerable.

“I'm glad you're coming to church.”

“I'll be there again this Sunday,” she said, trying to sound upbeat. Instead, having him so near and looking at her so intently caused her breath to catch and her words to sound airy.

“Do you trust me yet?” he asked.

You can't afford to trust anyone,
her brain told her. But at the moment, she didn't want to think. She wanted to stand close to Jake, who smelled so good, whose warmth she craved. “I'm trying to.”

“I'm not out to hurt you, you know. I care for you.”

Her pulse thrummed in her ears. She cared for him, too. But the words remained locked inside her head, inside her heart. “I think I've seen evidence that you care.”

“Oh?”

“We had several new patients the end of this week. Also had new patients making appointments for checkups.”

“That's good news.” He looked pleased and not one bit surprised she'd changed the subject.

“I imagine I have you to thank for that.”

He brushed her hair behind her ear, then smoothed his palm over her jawline. “You've impressed parents with your caring and expertise. They must be talking.”

“I have a feeling it's more than that. Thank you.” His touch soothed her. Some rare sense of daring made her want to take a risk, so she pressed her cheek against his palm.

In the dark, makeshift nursery, lit only by the small night-light in the corner, he pulled her close. Cupped her cheeks in his warm, rough hands. “I don't know what the future may hold with Abby. But one thing is certain. I want more with you, more than friendship. More than your pediatric expertise. I want...”