Love Like Hallelujah (23 page)

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Authors: Lutishia Lovely

Tags: #Fiction, #African American, #General, #Christian, #Contemporary Women

BOOK: Love Like Hallelujah
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Vivian understood her friend’s reaction. But she also understood that God was at work here. It was time for healing.

“She wants to ask your forgiveness, Tai. She knows that she has treated you badly, and it wasn’t right. She wants to apologize and ask you to forgive her for these sins against you.”

“Well, hell, now that you put it like that…I guess I would come off like the wicked witch not to talk to her ass. Put her on.”

Vivian hid a smile. Just like God to use what looked like a negative situation to work his perfect will. All things really did work together for good for those who loved the Lord.
Work it, Jesus
. She handed the phone to Janeé, who got up and walked to the edge of the patio that looked out over the ocean.

“Thank you, Tai, for taking my call. It would be understandable if you didn’t.” Janeé took a deep breath. “Tai, I’m sorry, for everything. I’m sorry for all the pain I’ve caused you, for the affair with King, for being uncooperative during our meeting, and not telling the whole truth when you asked about Kelvin. I’ve been jealous of you for so long, hated you for so long, for getting what I thought was mine, for marrying the man who wouldn’t marry me, even though I begged him to.

“I am truly sorry. And I hope that someday you can find it in your heart to forgive me.”

Both women were silent, both wiping away tears. Until now, Tai hadn’t realized how heavy hate was. But now, her animosity for Janeé was lifting, through the power of forgiveness, and she recognized her feelings toward Janeé for what they were—a burden.

“It’s amazing what we women do to each other,” Tai said, after a long silence. “And I never thought the day would come when I’d say these words but…I forgive you, Tootie, I mean Janeé.” The presence of God, like a gentle, summer breeze, caused chill bumps on the arms of both women. “I really mean it, too. It’s crazy, but I really mean it. I forgive you.”

“Thanks, Tai,” Janeé whispered. She wiped her eyes and tried to recompose herself. “I really need to get back to the table now. We’ve still got a lot to work out.”

“I’ll be praying for you.”

Janeé smiled as she hung up the phone. Her mother told her she’d been praying for a positive outcome to this situation for fifteen years. Without a doubt, Janeé knew that God answered prayer.

When she walked back to the table, Hans was regaling Derrick and Vivian with stories of growing up in post–World War II Germany. Even though the war had been over for years by the time he was born, its effects were felt for decades afterward. It shaped the staunch, hardworking, no-nonsense persona for which Germans were known. It was partly true, but not all. As they were seeing, Germans could be kind, lovable, generous, and funny. Janeé loved Hans more with each passing day.

She sat down and noticed pictures of her two younger children on the table. “Oh, so proud Papa has shown you Daniella and Sophie?”

“And rightly so,” Vivian answered. “They’re beautiful children.”

“So,” Derrick said, steering back to the reason they were there. “What’s next? How do we handle this situation?”

“Well,” Janeé said. “Hans and I are on our way to visit Kelvin tomorrow. What we tell him depends largely on what you guys want to do. Yes, he has a right to know who his father is, but you guys also have the right to not have your lives disrupted because of my mistake.”

“God doesn’t make mistakes,” Vivian interjected. “The circumstances may have been unsatisfactory and in poor judgment, but Kelvin was born because he was supposed to be here.”

“Thank you,” Janeé said simply. Vivian’s comments were a sign that maybe Derrick would accept his son.

Vivian looked at Derrick. She knew there was a part of him that wanted to know Kelvin. She was sure Janeé wanted them to know each other. She knew that the best way to deal with the situation was open, up front, and above board. Sooner or later, everyone would know about Kelvin. Heads would turn and tongues would wag, but the fact of it was, Derrick had another son. And his name was Kelvin. The chips would have to fall where they landed.

“What do you think?” Vivian asked, looking at Derrick.

“I say let the boy decide. If he wants to meet me, I’m open to doing that. We’ll welcome him into our home, and into our life. If he wants to keep a distance, that’s fine, too. He’s probably been through enough turmoil within himself about this. We’ll do whatever works best for the boy.”

Once again, Janeé’s eyes filled with tears. She reached for a napkin. “I’m sorry, I just can’t stop crying. I was afraid to even dream the ending could look like this. And here you guys are, so understanding, so kind….”

“It’s not us, darlin’,” Vivian said truthfully. “It’s the Lord. In my own flesh, I might have another reaction. In fact, I most definitely would be thinking about a beat down. But when I love you with the love of Christ, unconditionally, the way God loves me? It feels like this. This is what God’s love feels like.”

Janeé sniffled, looked into the distance. “Maybe it’s time for me to get to know God again.” She laughed sarcastically. “He probably doesn’t even remember who I am.”

Vivian grabbed Janeé’s hand, looked her straight in the eye. “You’re His precious daughter. How could He forget you? He loves you, and has had you in His arms this whole time.”

Unbidden, a childhood song Janeé’s mother used to sing rose up in her mind. “…little ones to Him belong. They are weak, but He is strong. Yes, Jesus loves me. Yes, Jesus loves me. Yes, Jesus loves me. The Bible tells me so….”

39
A Father’s Pride

“It doesn’t matter that you’re on the pill,” Hope said in an aggravated tone. “You still need to be using protection. How long have you known the guy, not even six months? Do you know he’s being monogamous? Do you know anything about his past sexual partners, his sexual history?”

“Ah, girl, who wants plastic in the pussy? Ain’t nobody gonna get AIDS. Lighten yo’ ass up!”

“Everyone who has AIDS probably thought that very thing. I’m serious, Frieda—”

“And I am, too. Look, we both got tested. Satisfied?”

“You both took an AIDS test?”

“That’s right, went down to the clinic together. He doesn’t like wearing a condom any more than I like feeling one. So we went and got tested and that’s that.”

“Well, and I don’t mean to put thoughts in your head, but what’s to say he won’t get busy with someone else?”

“What’s to say Cy won’t?”

“We’re married; there’s a difference.”

“Is it? Because there’s about a million cheatin’ husbands out there who’ll prove yo’ ass wrong.”

Hope resisted the urge to get even more aggravated than she already was. Frieda had never listened to her.
I don’t know what led me to believe she’d listen now.
Besides, Frieda was right. Married men did cheat.

“Whatever, cuz, just be careful.”

“I always am. Gorgio’s dick’s too good for me to mess it up.”

“I didn’t mean like
that,
” Hope said, rolling her eyes.

“I know, but I did,” Frieda said, laughing. “What about you and Cy? You’re giving him head, right?” Frieda asked this as nonchalantly as commenting on the weather.

“Frieda Lemay Jackson, no you didn’t!” Hope exclaimed.

“I’ll take that as a yes,” Frieda replied calmly.

Hope’s big smile could not be hidden. And it didn’t go unnoticed by her curious cousin, who added, “Oh, and he’s giving it pretty good, too. That’s good, that’s good. That’ll keep a man around.”

“I’m not even going to talk with you about this, Frieda,” Hope said with feigned indignation. “Some things should remain in the bedroom.”

“Not really. It’s much better when it’s done in the kitchen, on the dining room table, and if you can sneak and get it on the balcony under a full moon….”

“Frieda, shut up!”

“You’re getting wet, huh?”

“You are a trip.”

“But that’s why you love me. I keep it real.”

Hope shook her head, while silently contemplating balconies, full moons, and Cy’s holiday surprise.

 

Derrick and Cy headed back to the church in Cy’s Azure. They’d just left the restaurant where Derrick had shared the news with Cy, the first person in his ministry to hear about Kelvin. Derrick wanted to see Cy’s reaction and get his opinion. His reaction was subdued and opinion straightforward, both as Derrick had expected.

“It was something that happened a long time ago, that you knew nothing about,” Cy said. “You have nothing to be ashamed of. I’d take the wind out of any would-be gossiper’s sails by putting the information out there myself. Invite him to church, make a grand introduction, and use it as a teaching tool, both as to the value of safe sex and how God can turn what looks like mistakes into blessings.”

Derrick liked what Cy had to say, but admitted saying it and doing it were two different things. He and Vivian hadn’t met Kelvin yet, or told the children about him. Hans and Janeé had phoned from Germany, shortly after their visit with Kelvin. They’d told Kelvin what happened, that his father knew about him and was prepared to meet him whenever Kelvin was ready. Kelvin had told his mother he had to think about it. He was frightened that the reality would not equal the dream—his dream of a wonderful biological dad. In truth, Derrick would surpass his dream.

“When the time comes, we’ll handle it as gracefully as possible. I don’t plan to try and hide him, that’s for sure. And I don’t plan on flaunting him, either. I’ve prayed about it and released it to God. When the time comes, I trust I’ll know what to do.”

“And so you will, my brother.”

“What about you?” Derrick said. “When are we going to be seeing a Cy Jr.?”

“Funny you should ask.” Cy smiled. “We’re working on that now.”

“Oh, I suspect you’ve been working on something or other since the wedding night. Am I right?”

They both laughed.

“I never thought of a baby much, man. They always seemed to be a big responsibility, and a big hassle to my freewheeling lifestyle, if you know what I mean. But Hope’s changed that, got me thinking of diapers and things. So maybe in a year or so….”

“Like I said…whupped.”

Cy didn’t disagree. “It sounds pretty bad, huh?”

“Man, you need prayer.”

“I need prayer, huh? Please, you think I don’t see those sly looks that pass between you and Viv when you think no one’s watching? The little winks from the pulpit, licking your lips like you want to take a bite right there in church?”

“Ah, dang brother, you see that?”

“I see that.”

“I guess we’d better work on our signals a little bit. We’re getting sloppy.”

“I just hope I’m still trying to signal Hope like that in fifteen, twenty years.”

“Just keep it fresh, man, and keep it between the two of you. And it won’t get older, it’ll get better.”

“Even after the baby comes?”

“Even after the
babies
come.” Derrick continued. “Now, it’ll interrupt it for a minute. You’ll be ready to climb the walls and strangle your own child. But even that’s worth it. Ain’t nothing like looking at one of your own.” Derrick paused. “When I saw Kelvin, even with everything else that came with him, there was a sense of pride in the fact that he’s mine.”

“It must be how God feels when He looks at us, huh?” Cy speculated. “No matter what else comes with us, all our mess, crazy acting, disobedience, and what not? He still feels a sense of pride that we’re His.”

Derrick nodded and put out his fist. Cy gave him “dap.”

Enough said.

40
Satisfied

He’d promised himself it wouldn’t happen again. But here he was, naked, in Stacy’s bed. And she was doing what he’d repeatedly envisioned since the last time it happened. She was satisfying him orally, and royally, for the second time that night.

“I want to feel you inside me,” Stacy whispered between licks. She teased him, a touch here, a nip there, just enough to take him to, but not over the edge. They’d been together intimately half a dozen times and this time, she was determined the night would end with her being as satisfied as he was.

“C’mon, baby,” Darius moaned. “It feels good.”

Stacy straddled Darius and tried to put him inside her. He grabbed her hand. “No, Stacy, we can’t do that.”

“Yes, we can,” she countered, bending down to please him once more. “Is this good?”

“Oh, yes.”

“Well, just close your eyes and enjoy the ride, baby.”

Stacy went to work then, all mouth and fingers. Darius tossed and turned, in delirious pleasure. And just when he was about to climax, Stacy mounted him.

It happened so fast, Darius was pumping before he realized it. And once he started, he couldn’t stop.
Ooh, this feels good
. Better than it had ever felt with Gwen. It was different, softer, wetter. Stacy had him in an iron grip. The friction generated by her muscle control had him freaking, for her.

He flipped Stacy over, positioned her on her knees, and entered her in a more familiar way, from behind.

“Oh, yes. Do it baby, do it.” Stacy was wild with passion. This is what she’d wanted for so long, and it was as good as she’d dreamed it would be. Darius! She was with Darius, completely. She pressed herself against him as he pounded hard, relentless.

Stacy grabbed the headboard as Darius grabbed her hips and continued his frenzied lovemaking. They were both sweating, the bed creaking loudly.

“Oh, Darius,” Stacy panted.

“Bo,” Darius whispered.

Did he just say Bo? No, I’m trippin’. He must have said boo.
Whatever he said, he was doing it to her so good. “Yes, baby, I’m your boo, I’m your boo. Ooh…”

Oh, damn! I think I said Bo!
If Darius hadn’t been so far gone, he would have lost his erection. As it was, thinking of his lover only heightened his pleasure. As he climaxed it was Bo, not Stacy, who was on his mind.

Stacy rolled over, into Darius’s arms. She softly kissed his face. “That was incredible.”

Darius’s thoughts were totally different.
What have I done? Bo is going to kill me!
“We shouldn’t have done it, Stacy.”

Oh, hell. Here this nucka is getting ready to ruin a good night.
“Look, let’s not get into guilt tripping. I have no regrets about sleeping with you. I’m
glad
we did it.”

Darius rolled out of bed and grabbed his pants. He looked down at her as he stumbled to put them on. “We can’t tell anybody, Stacy. I don’t want people thinking I sleep around.”

“What? Is that what you call this? Sleeping around? I don’t want to think you sleep around either. I want to think you make
love
to the woman you’re
dating
. Why are you being so uptight?”

Because Bo’s gonna have my ass when he smells your pussy on my clothes.
Darius started removing his pants. “Can I take a shower?” he asked, already walking to the bathroom.

Stacy watched his muscular ass ripple out of her room. “Well,” she said to the four walls. “That’s not exactly the ending I expected.” She fell back on the bed, grabbed the pillow, and smiled. “But it’s a start.”

 

“You fucked her, didn’t you, didn’t you?” Bo was furious, walking from one end of the living room to the other.

“Look, just because I come home late—”

“Smelling like new soap. We don’t use no damn Dove, or Ivory, or whatever the hell that is on you.”

“You’re trippin’.”

Darius was getting the reaction he’d expected after coming home at two-thirty in the morning. He’d already decided to lie though, or there would be even more of an explosion.

“I knew that bitch was gonna give me problems. I just knew it.” Bo flopped down dramatically on the couch, biting his fingernails.

“I’m gonna tell her,” he said, jumping up again. “If you don’t stop seeing her, I’m going to tell her about us, tell her why you’ll never,
ever
invite her to
your
house.”

Darius walked over to Bo quietly and calmly. He stood staring at him, his nose inches away from Bo’s. “If you ever threaten to out me again,” he said with a voice just above a whisper, “I’ll walk out that door and not look back. Do you understand?”

Bo bit his lip but said nothing.

“Do you understand me, Bo? I will not be threatened, not by you, not by anybody.”

Bo tried to grab Darius’s arm, but he pulled away.

“I’m sorry,” Bo said. “But you promised. You promised you wouldn’t fuck her.”

“And I didn’t.”

“Swear on a stack of Bibles?”

Darius heaved a heavy sigh. “Look, you either believe me or you don’t.”

Bo didn’t miss the fact that Darius didn’t swear. But he decided to let it go. There were things he could do for Darius that Stacy could only dream of.

He grabbed his man and hugged him tightly. Darius hugged him back.

“Hey,” Darius said, pulling Bo toward the couch and taking his hands in his as they sat down. “I wasn’t going to tell you this until we were at dinner tomorrow, but I guess this is an even better time.”

Bo perked up. “What?”

“I got you a job.”

“What?”

“You are now my manager—a full-time, paid position.”

Bo screamed.

“Of course this means you’re indispensable. You’ll have to travel with me everywhere, especially when we go on tour.”

“Oh, Darius, I knew you loved me!” Bo’s eyes glistened with tears. And to think he’d almost ruined the moment, fretting over a shriveled up pussy. How did he ever think that could replace his eight-inch hammer?

Bo gave Darius a big hug and kissed him passionately.
Go ahead and give Stacy what she wants
, he thought as he maneuvered Darius toward their bedroom.
I’m getting ready to give him what he needs
.

Darius smiled at Bo as they both undressed. Life was good, and getting better. He’d made two people very happy tonight. And he felt great, too. Both Stacy and Bo seemed determined to have him. They probably wouldn’t be sharing Thanksgiving turkey together, but maybe there was a way to keep everyone satisfied.

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