Love Me Twice (19 page)

Her heart did a somersault and landed upside down in the pit of her stomach. “Yeah, I am. I’m sorry, Drew.” She reached out a hand to touch him, and he jerked out of her reach. “I’m sorry. All the things I said to you were true. They still are. I love you.”

“I love you too, but this won’t work. You and me, I mean. Not that you aren’t fabulous in bed. You are. But he was in bed with us. I can’t, won’t live that way.”

Oh God! Five years ago, Sean had accused her of the same thing. She knew how he felt now, because not only had she brought someone else into the bed this time, but so had Drew.

“I won’t deny it, Drew. I didn’t give you one hundred percent of me, but you didn’t give me one hundred percent either.” He looked over his hunched shoulder at her as if she’d grown a second head. “Don’t look at me that way. I’m not saying I didn’t enjoy it. I did. You’re a wonderful lover, just like I knew you would be, but you weren’t all into it anymore than I was. We know my excuse, what’s yours?”

 “Geez, Celeste. I’m sorry. I don’t know what the hell happened here tonight.”

She lifted the covers. “Come back to bed. Let’s sit here and see if we can figure it out.”

Drew crawled in beside her and took her hand. He threaded his fingers through hers and rested their intertwined hands on top of the covers.

“Want to talk about it?”

“Hell no. I may have just made a colossal mistake, but I’ve still got my balls, so I’d have to say no, I don’t want to talk about it.”

Celeste couldn’t suppress her laugh, or the smile that came with it. Men. Talk was the only four-letter word they considered a curse word.

“That’s too bad. I was going to tell you how good your enormous cock felt, and what a magnificent lover you were.”

“You’re a riot. I don’t see what’s humorous about this.”

He was right. It wasn’t funny. For her, the decision was made, sort of. At least she knew a lifetime with Drew was out of question. That left Sean, if she wanted him. She pushed the insidious thought out of her mind. It could wait until she was alone, but Drew needed her right now.

“So, I take it that you don’t want me to move in yet.”

Drew dropped his head back, and it hit the headboard with an audible thud. Celeste glanced over her shoulder. His jaw was clenched, his eyes closed.

“It’s alright, Drew. I’m with you on this.”

“I love you, Celeste. I just never thought it would be like this between us.”

“Me either. But I have to say, it’s a huge weight off my shoulders.”

“Are you going back to him?”

Celeste let her head fall back and closed her eyes too. “I don’t know.” She gave Drew’s hand a little squeeze. “Whatever I decide, I want you to remain a friend.”

“I’ll always be your friend, but I’m not sure Sean will let me anywhere near you if he finds out about tonight.”

“Don’t worry about that. He knows.”

Drew jerked upright and turned to face her. “He does?”

“Well, I’m sure he suspects. He did order me to sleep with you. I’m sure he expected me to follow his order.”

Drew pulled his knees up and folded his arms across them. His head came to rest on his forearms. “Shit.”

Celeste couldn’t argue with that wisdom so she remained silent.

“I’ll talk to him.” He sounded like a condemned man ready to face his accuser.

“No, don’t do that. Let me tell him. I may not need to anyway.”

He turned his head without raising it and asked, “Why not? You aren’t going to lie to him are you?”

“No, I’m just saying, it might not be necessary to tell him anything. I’m not sure I’m going back to him.”

“Fuck.”

“My thoughts, exactly.”

They talked late into the night and finally fell asleep side by side. Drew woke, and in the complete darkness of the interior cabin, he lifted his wrist to consult his glow-in-the-dark watch. The motion brought to mind another morning when he’d crept out of a woman’s bed. He slid his feet to the floor, and found his sarong where he’d dropped it near the door the previous evening.

Celeste had known he’d held something back, and she’d tried her best to get him to spill his guts. He’d finally resorted to reciting his name, rank and serial number, and she’d relented. There was no way in hell he was going to tell her that his body had been with her, but his mind had been filled with images and memories of another woman. Hell would freeze over before he admitted that – to anyone. It had never happened before, and he didn’t know what it meant. He did know – Celeste deserved better.

Last night he’d made love with Celeste. On this, the morning after, he should have felt lighthearted, smug. Instead, he was confused. Celeste loved him, but not the way either one of them had believed. She was a beautiful, desirable woman, and given the opportunity, he’d take her to his bed again. Not that it would ever happen. Sean would kill him before he’d let him touch his woman again.

And that’s what Celeste was, Sean’s woman. Somehow, Drew had to make the asshole see that. He’d promised Celeste he wouldn’t tell Sean that Drew was out of the running. Drew figured Sean deserved to be left wondering for a couple more days. He had no problem letting the bastard squirm for a while.

The ship should be dropping anchor soon at the private island, and as planned, the three of them were to spend the day together. He didn’t have a clue how that was going to work out. In fact, he couldn’t imagine it at all. That’s why he was headed to the pool to see Sean. He’d think up an excuse to leave the two of them alone.

Sean’s body cut through the dark water like a shark scenting blood. Drew stood outside the dim lamplight in the pre-dawn and watched his friend. It amused him that Sean was such an avid swimmer, yet couldn’t abide the Navy. It was a shame. With his skills, Sean would have made one hell of a SEAL.

Drew moved into the yellow circle of light next to the pool and waited for Sean to acknowledge his presence. With his arms folded across his chest, Drew leaned against the lamp pole and crossed one ankle over the other. Sean didn’t like to have his morning swim interrupted, so Drew anticipated a long wait. He counted laps, knew Sean kept him waiting on purpose, as his friend completed his tenth lap, and instead of stopping, executed a perfect turn and kickoff move.

It all happened at once. Drew saw it through a slow-motion lens. He shrugged his shoulder and pushed away from the lamppost, preparing to leave Sean to his swim. It would be easy enough to talk to him when he returned to the stateroom. Drew uncrossed his ankles, and the deck tilted beneath him. He grabbed for the lamppost and missed as a wave of pool water sloshed over the side of the pool and swept him off his one foot still in contact with the deck. He hit the deck like a stone, and slid toward the starboard railing like a fish over a dam.

Drew registered the dangerous angle of the deck as the scraping of chairs and tables across the painted deck surface, the groan and grind of metal stretched to its limits, glass shattering at the nearby bar, and screams from the few people awake at the early hour, met his ears. In the Navy, he’d been on ships tilted at worse angles, but they’d been in the midst of hurricanes, not in the middle of calm seas. He slid to a stop against the Plexiglas railing and instinctively reached out and wrapped a hand around the nearest rail support. His back hurt like a son-of-a-gun as he used his other hand and his feet to push back the tangle of overturned tables and chairs surrounding him. Then he remembered Sean.

He fought the first wave of panic and scanned the debris for his friend. He found him, prone on the deck, his arms stretched above his head, clinging to the lamppost Drew had been unable to grasp himself.

“Sean! You okay?”

“Yeah. You?”

“Fine, I think. What the hell happened?”

“Fuck if I know.”

The ship began to right itself. Drew held on to the rail support until the deck was once again at a safe angle, and then he used the support to heave himself off the deck. Sean rolled to his back and then to his feet at the same time, like the two of them were connected by invisible strings.

“Let’s get to the Bridge and see what the fuck happened.”

Drew didn’t need to be told. As soon as he’d seen Sean was ambulatory, his feet turned in the direction of the Bridge. By the time the two punched in the electronic code and opened the secure door, the
Lothario
, having righted itself, then listed slightly to port, had finally stabilized.

Sean issued orders to check on the passengers and crew, as he made his way to the Captain who stood at a bank of computer monitors wearing nothing more than a pair of cotton pajama pants. Drew stopped one of the crew and sent him to check on Celeste and Bree and to bring them to the Bridge, ASAP.

Pink and gold painted the horizon, and in the distance, Drew made out the shape of their island destination. At least they weren’t far from help. He knew Richard kept a helicopter on the island for his personal use, as well as for emergencies. He hoped to hell they didn’t need it.

Sean assumed the mantle of man in charge, one that came naturally to him. He dispatched crew members to assess damage, making sure everyone knew the first priority was to account for the passengers and crew. And then he turned his attention to Captain Whittier and the engineer with him. Drew listened as the man hurried through his best explanation for what had happened.

“So, you’re saying something went wrong with the pumps during the routine ballast water exchange?” Sean asked.

“Yes, sir. I don’t know what happened. The pumps are computer operated to keep the ballast equalized during the exchange, but my best theory at the moment is there was a malfunction in the program, and coupled with our sharp turn for anchorage, that caused the ship to list to starboard approximately fifteen degrees. Whatever caused it must have fixed itself, because the ballast began to equal out almost immediately, and the ship righted.”

Drew and Sean exchanged a glance laden with understanding. This was the grand gesture the eco-terrorists wanted. No way would they be able to keep something like this out of the media, not to mention there would be all kinds of investigations into the cause. They’d be damned lucky if no one was seriously hurt.

 “Shit.” Drew summed it up.

Bree and Celeste arrived a few minutes later. Both were shaken, but ready to work immediately. Drew’s heart slammed against his ribcage when he saw Bree walk, unharmed, onto the Bridge. He didn’t have time to examine or question the feeling. Celeste made a beeline for him and threw herself against him. He wrapped his arms around her and held her, somewhat surprised by her public display. By all rights, she should have been in Sean’s arms, but Drew was too much of a gentleman to point that out. Instead, he held her until she slipped from his arms.

“You’re okay,” she said.

“Apparently.”

“I’m sorry, Drew.” She stepped back and adjusted her sarong, the same one she’d worn last night. “I was asleep, and I got thrown out of bed. Everything was sliding around and breaking and I couldn’t find you in the dark.” She fidgeted and Drew took her hands in his and waited until she looked at him.

“I’m sorry. I shouldn’t have left without telling you I was going.”

“No, you didn’t owe me anything. I was  just. . . . ”

“Worried. I’m sorry. Are you okay?”

“Yes. I’m fine.” She looked over her shoulder at Sean. His back was to them, and she asked, “Sean?”

“Fine. That might have been the last straw for him, though. He’s not a fan of ships in the best of times.”

His comment drew a smile and a chuckle from Celeste, just what he’d intended.

“I’m sure you’re right. Somehow, I don’t think we’ll be taking a honeymoon cruise.”

Drew couldn’t hide his surprise. “Then you’re going back to him.”

“Only if he’s offering a lifetime contract.”

Sean didn’t miss a beat. His eyes scanned his team with expert skill, and apparently satisfied they were unhurt, he took charge. “If this tender reunion is over, can we get to work here?”

“Some things never change,” Drew whispered to Celeste, earning another smile from her. They joined Sean and Bree at the Engineer’s desk.

“Bree tells me all passengers and crew are accounted for,” Sean said by way of greeting.

“Yes,” Celeste confirmed. “So far, it appears all injuries are minor.”