Love on a Dirt Road (The Roughneck Series Book 1) (10 page)

Chapter 11

Jase wasn't kidding when he said this hitch would be a different. I was used to my morning texts and evening talks. I wasn't really getting that this time. He would call when he could but the signal was horrible in Addis, the little town they were staying in during the rig move. He assured me it would be better once they got settled in the man camp. But it had been almost a week and it wasn't better yet. I knew he was having a tough hitch too which made it worse. I felt bad for him. He sounded stressed out. Apparently everything that could go wrong, was. He kept telling me he was fine but I could hear tension in his voice.

And now it was Sunday night, I was lying in bed with a pint of chocolate chip cookie dough, feeling sorry for myself. When I heard a text come through I jumped off my bed and grabbed the phone.

Jase: I miss you

Me: I miss you baby!

Jase: Going to get a drink with the crew, call you in a bit.

Me: Ok, be careful. love you

Jase: Love you more

  So I sat, and I waited. And waited. I knew it was good for him to unwind and have a drink. Jase rarely drank so I knew he must be stressed. But I really missed him. I wanted to hear his voice. I didn't want to bother him but I couldn't wait anymore so I dialed his number.

  "Hello" Jase picked up the phone after a few rings.

  "Hey" I said "Are you busy?"

  "Hey baby" He said, with a little slur. "I was gonna call you when I got back to the room."

  "It's ok." I said. But the truth was, my feelings were a little hurt he hadn't called me yet.

  There was lots of noise in the background. There was definitely a crowd at the bar.

  "Hey Romeo, you want a beer!" I heard a male's voice yell.

  "Yeah, dude" Jase said.

  "Romeo huh?" I asked.

  Everybody's got a nickname baby."

  "Babe, you're not driving tonight are you?" I asked. I was already stressed enough, I definitely couldn't handle worrying about him drinking and driving.

  "Nah...the bar is at the motel" He said a little too slowly. I had never heard Jase drunk or even with a buzz. It was definitely different.

  "Jase! Come play pool with us!" I heard a female yell in the background.

  What the fuck?!?

  "Who was that?" I asked. I was immediately pissed.

  "It's nobody baby. I promise"

  There was a pause and then "Fuck" Jase said.

  "Baby, I gotta call you back my..."

  Nothing. Silence.

  I tried to compose myself. I was shaking. I was pissed. I tried to call Jase back. Voicemail.

  Oh my God! Oh my God! Oh my God! What the fuck was that? Who was that? I was freaking out.

  I tried to call him again. Voicemail.

  Son of a bitch! He wouldn't do this to me. Would he? No he wouldn't. But he was drinking. People did stupid shit when they drank. Oh my God. This can't be happening. I can't handle this.

  I paced around my room for about 30 minutes before I tried to call again. Voicemail.

  Cherokee Inn. I grabbed my keys and my purse and headed to the door. I googled the address when I got in my car and put it in my GPS.

  Fuck that! I was not going to be played for a fool. He wouldn't do this to me. He couldn't. He promised. Trust was everything. His words rang through my mind. Was I crazy? Psycho was probably a better description for what I was doing. But I didn't care. I had to know. Even if I had to see it with my own eyes. The image of Jase with someone else made my stomach turn. I had seen it with Derek and it hurt. But Jase. I wouldn't survive. I wouldn't make it through this. But I had to know.  I kept rubbing my fingers across my necklace. I hadn't taken it off since Jase gave it to me. God. Please help me.

  I tried shut my emotions off and I drove in silence. No radio. Nothing. Just me and the sick knot in my stomach.

  Addis 8 miles.

  It was 1:54 am. I had been driving for almost 5 hours. I was numb at this point. Until I saw the neon sign "Cherokee Inn"

  My entire body started trembling. Holy Shit. I didn't know if I could do it.  I had to. I didn't have a choice. I drove into the shitty little motel parking lot and immediately spotted his truck.

  Fuck! Fuck! Fuck!

  I put my car in park beside his truck. I spotted his muddy boots outside the room in front of his truck. Room 21.

  I jumped out of my car and went to the door and started banging. Nothing.

  I kept banging and finally heard rustling through the door.

  "Who the fuck?" I heard Jase mumble. The walls were thin.  I heard the door unlock and Jase stood in the doorway looking half asleep and confused.

  "Lainey?" He whispered as I rushed past him.

  "Lainey, what are you doing here?" He said, completely confused.

  I immediately started scanning the room. I walked past the bed and to the bathroom. No one was here.

  Shit. I was wrong. I was so wrong. I didn't know what to say. I didn't know what to do.

  So I just stood there in silence.

  "Wait a minute" Jase said when he realized what was going on. "Did you think I had someone else here?"

  I didn't speak.

  "Answer me, Lainey" He was pissed.

  I started trying to explain.

  "I heard a girl in the background. You hung up on me. You didn't answer my calls. You were drinking." I started yelling. I was trying to justify myself.

  "So you drove 5 hours because you thought I was fucking around on you!" He yelled.

  "Yes" I admitted. It was the truth. It's all I could say.

  "The girl you heard was my derrick hands wife.  He lives close to here so she came to stay with him. My phone went dead, I was trying to tell you. Yes, I was drinking. I'm fucking stressed out. I should have called you back when I got back to the room. I didn't want to wake you, I knew you had to work in the morning."

  I still couldn't speak. And Jase wasn't finished.

  "Fuck Lainey! You think leaving you doesn't fuck with my head too!" He yelled. "I get scared you're gonna find somebody better! But you have to trust me! And believe me! I'M NOT HIM!"

  “I would never do anything to lose you! Ever since I laid eyes on you, it's only been you Lainey! I can't see anyone but you! I would never do anything to fuck that up. I can't!"

Then he sat down on the bed and let out a heavy sigh.

  “I have you Lainey, I could never go back to life without you. I can't even fucking fathom it." He said quietly.

   I walked to the door and put my hand on the doorknob. The tears started to fall. Uncontrollably. How could I think Jase could do that to me? He's always been good to me. I had really messed things up. I didn't deserve him. I needed to go.

  "What are you doing?" He said.

  "I'm leaving" I whispered "I'm sorry."

  "You can't leave" He said and I felt him directly behind me.

  I was trembling. I couldn't stop the tears.

  "I'm sorry Jase" I said and my legs gave out. It was too much. I couldn't handle this.

  Jase caught me in his arms and carried me to the bed. I continued to sob.

  "Baby, I'm sorry for yelling. I'm sorry for not calling you back. I'm sorry I didn't explain who the girl was. I wasn't thinking. I had a buzz."

  "No, Jase stop. It was me. It's my issues. It's not your fault. I don't deserve you."

  "Are you serious baby? You deserve so much more than I could ever give you. But I'll try baby. I'll try my hardest to give you everything you deserve. Because you're it for me Lainey. You're all that matters."

  “I love you Jase. God, so much."

  "I love you baby" Jase said and kissed me tenderly.

  He laid down on the bed and pulled me beside him. He wrapped his arms around me.

  “I'm sorry" I repeated.

  "Stop" He said. "Don't apologize again. Please"

  All I could do was shake my head. The tears continued to fall until I drifted to sleep.

4:45 am

  I heard the beeping of an alarm and Jase started to stir. As I started to wake, the events of last night replayed in my mind. I was an idiot. How could I not trust him? He had never given me a reason. I can't believe I drove five hours ready to catch him cheating. Derek really had messed my head up, whether I wanted to admit it or not. Jase wrapped his arms around me tighter.

  "I hate the reason you drove all this way, but I'm glad you're here."

  "I'm s.."

  "Don't" He interrupted me "Don't say it. It's my fault too. I should have left right then and charged my phone. I would have probably flipped the fuck out if I was you."

  "You would have?" I asked. That statement made me feel a little better.

  "Hell yeah, if I heard some dude and then you didn't answer your phone. Baby, I would have lost my fucking mind."

  "I've just been missing you like crazy, it got to me" I said.

  "I know baby. Just don't look under the bed" Jase said playfully.

  I whipped my head around and gave him a glare.

  "Too soon?" He asked with a chuckle.

  "Too soon." I said as I pinched his nipple.

  "Ow!" Jase laughed and then asked "What about work?"

  Shit, I forgot about work!" I was so pissed, it didn't even cross my mind. Luckily I had never called in before, so it shouldn't be a big deal. "I'll work it out though."

  "Don't you have a safety meeting at 5:30?" I asked when I looked at the clock, it was almost 5.

  "Yeah, I gotta leave at 5:15. I got a few minutes" Jase said as he kissed my neck.

  "Fifteen minutes, Jase?" I asked. He always took his time, I didn't think he could do it.

  "Baby, I haven't been able to touch you in a week, all I need is 5 minutes" Jase said as he flipped me on my back and grabbed the seam of my panties.

  "Well come on then" I said with a giggle as I pulled him closer to me.

  I was barely out of Addis when I needed to stop for gas. I took the opportunity to shoot Dr. Weston an email and let him know I was taking a sick day. That's when I noticed a text from Sam, 4 texts actually in the last 30 minutes. I had the radio up and didn't even hear my phone.

Sam: where are you?

Sam: are u ok?

Sam: ?????

Sam: ok i'm freaking out now.

Me: Sorry, Long story. I'm on my way back from Addis. I'll explain later. I'm ok.

Sam: Fuck yeah you will! Be careful!

Me: 10-4

  Once I got home, all I wanted to do was crawl in my bed. Ten hours of driving plus only 2 hours sleep had got to me. Not to mention my emotions being in complete overdrive. I was physically and emotionally drained.  I needed sleep.

Jase: just checking on you

Me: Just got home, about to sleep

Jase: I miss you already. I love you

Me: Me too. I love you more

Jase: Not possible. get some sleep

  I drifted off to sleep and a few minutes later I heard the front door close and the daily thud of Sam's suitcase. I looked at my phone which was still in my hand. It was 5:30. I had slept all afternoon.

  "Ok, bitch, spill" Sam said as she opened my door and flopped down on the bed bedside me.

  I gave her the whole pathetic story and waited for her reaction.

  "Damn, psycho!" She laughed.

  "Thanks Sam!" I said

  "I'm just kidding, I would have went crazy too. I don't know if I would have drove all that way if it were Moon" Then she paused for a minute. "Yeah, I probably would have actually. But I probably would have taken my gun and been on an episode of Snapped." She said with complete honesty.

  "Angel?" Yelled a deep voice from the living room.

  "Daddy?" Sam gave me a confused look and then jumped off the bed.

  "Daddy!" She yelled as she ran into the living room and dove into his arms.

  I followed Sam into the living room. There was Joe, all 6'2 of him.

  "I missed you Angel" He said as he kissed Sam on the head.

  "Me too dad" She said with her face buried in his chest. "How long are you staying?" She looked up at him and asked.

  "I can only stay a couple of days." Just then he looked in my direction "Lainey! Hey sweetie, how ya been? Sam told me you were back home."

  "I'm good" As I gave him a side hug "Yeah I'm back for good"

  "Glad to hear it, somebody needs to keep my angel in line"

  "Daddy, I'm a good girl" Sam said with a straight face, although I'm not sure how she managed.