Love's Fate (Love Trilogy #1) (6 page)

“I’m really glad we did this.” He said

“Me too.” I agreed reaching for the door.

“So I guess I’ll see you Thursday?” he said it like a question, still worried that I might change my mind.

I felt bad for all the times I’d turned him down. He really was a great guy.

“Thursday”’ I confirmed “and I’m wearing my jeans!” I reminded him.

I had the door open now and he just stared at me for a minute. It made me a little uncomfortable.

“What?” I asked nervously.

“Just trying to memorize the way you look right now, since I’ll probably never see it again.” he teased, then quickly added “not that you don’t look great in jeans too!” 

We both laughed. I was inside my room now and he sighed noting the distance
between us.

“Thursday” he said nodding and then winked at me before turning to reluctantly walk away.

I closed the door and turned to face Amy. I had known she would wait up for me, so I wasn’t surprised.

“I want all the juicy details!” she declared looking at me expectantly.

I rolled my eyes but proceeded to give her a rundown of the evening as I undressed. She suggested that we double date Thursday night with her and Dan and I agreed. I was a little nervous about what sort of expectations there would be at the end of a second date. I thought having some other people around might make it feel more casual.

As I lay in bed trying to fall asleep, I thought about how well the night had gone. Better than I’d expected. Jared was very easy to talk to and fun to be around. I was looking forward to Thursday, and that surprised me a little. I couldn’t even remember why I had been so opposed to going out with him in the first place. Then I realized it was because this whole time I’d been hoping to run into my mystery man again, and I hadn’t wanted to be dating someone else when I finally did. That seemed so ridiculous now. Saving myself for someone I didn’t even know. It just wasn’t healthy.

I was glad that I had finally agreed to go out with Jared. I had a good time, and I hadn’t thought about the guy from the coffee shop all night. But now that I had thought of him, he consumed my thoughts again. I tried to picture Jared’s face in my mind, but all I could see was
his
. It was his face that was in my head as I drifted off to sleep.

I spent the summer after my mother’s death traveling through Europe. A few days here, a few weeks there, depending on how much I liked the place. I was beginning to feel like a nomad, and I loved the freedom in that.

My whole life I had been so constrained, I had always been so obligated to everyone else around me. Now I had no one to answer to but myself. I carried all my belongings in a single shoulder bag. I could pick up and leave whenever the mood struck me. I was a free spirit, floating wherever the wind took me. But after several months the loneliness began to get to me.

It was a strange feeling not having anyone know where you were, having no one care. I missed having someone to talk to about my day, someone to laugh with someone to hang with. I missed Charlie. I had sent him a few letters in the last few months, but I had no return address for a reply. I never stayed anywhere long enough.

I was in France now. I liked it here. I sat at a small café in Paris watching the sunrise and writing another letter to Charlie. Telling him about all the places I’d seen since I’d last wrote.

“Vous habitez ici?” An exotic looking French woman at the table next to me was looking at me expectantly, so I assumed she was speaking to me.

“I’m sorry I don’t speak French” I apologized.

She smiled at me as if I’d answered her question.

“Ah, an American” she replied with a sexy French accent “très beau” she added nodding approvingly.

I smiled nervously.

“Visiting?” she asked moving over to sit at my table.

“Yes” I felt a little intimidated by her; she seemed so bold and confident, different than any woman I had met before.

“Do you know anyone in Paris?” she questioned.

She seemed to be enjoying my obvious nervousness.

“No actually. I’ve been traveling for a while now. I’ve been in Paris just a few days.”

She smiled again. She had full pouty lips, and a seductive smile.

“Un explorateur! Then you must let me show you the sights” she insisted. “What have you already seen?”

“Not much” I admitted.

I was grateful for the company. It was so nice to have someone to talk to after my months of solitude. Until she’d begun to speak to me I hadn’t realized how starved for conversation I had been. I folded the unfinished letter to Charlie and put it in my bag, I could finish it later.

“What do you recommend?” I asked, accepting her invitation to be my tour guide.

“Mon nom est Gisselle, but you can call me Elle” She smiled her seductive smile and grabbed my hand pulling me up from the table, her caramel colored curls bouncing playfully at her shoulders.

“I’m Michael.” I told her as I threw my bag over my shoulder and followed her from the café.

We spent the next several hours walking through the streets of Paris. She took me past Notre Dame and St. Chapelle, explaining the history of each with true reverence and passion. I wondered if she actually was a tour guide. She’d make a good one.

Next we visited the Louvre Museum. It was very impressive, but I had never been very comfortable in museums. Not since childhood. So we didn’t stay long. We ate lunch at a little café nestled in the Tuileries Gardens. It was the most fun I’d had since coming to Europe.

My personal tour continued after lunch. Place de la Concorde, Pont Alexander III, Napoleon’s tomb. She held my hand as she skipped through the ancient city enjoying my first impressions of monuments that she’d seen her whole life. She was truly magnetic. I followed her through Paris like a moth to a flame. Maybe it was just because of the intense isolation and loneliness that I’d been feeling, but I didn’t want this day to end.

Our day finally did end at the ultimate tourist attraction: the Eiffel Tower. We had seen so much in a single day. I was near exhaustion as we quietly ate dinner. I realized this was the longest stretch of silence we’d shared since we met.

Had that only been this morning?

Elle had peppered me with questions all day, in between her descriptions of the places we’d been. I realized she had learned so much about me, but I knew very little of her.

“So did you grow up in Paris?” I asked as we were finishing our dinner.

“Yes” she answered.

I waited for her to elaborate but she said nothing more. I thought it was strange after how talkative she’d been all day. Maybe she was just as tired as I was.

“Do you live nearby?” I continued trying to learn a little bit more about her.

“Would you like to see where I live?” she asked with her bewitching smile returning.

I couldn’t refuse. I didn’t want to think about spending another night alone.

We left the restaurant and I followed her back to her place. This time we walked in silence. It was strange how the mood had changed. She had seemed so happy and carefree today. Now she seemed almost somber as she led me through the dark streets.

She lived in a small loft above some boutiques in a beautiful part of the city. It was just a single large room divided into sections by her furniture; several couches were grouped together in one corner, bookshelves lined that wall, an art easel with some paints and blank canvases sat in the other corner. Behind a Japanese screen I could see her bed jutting out from underneath the large windows.

“Do you paint?” I asked gesturing toward the evidence in the corner.

She just shrugged as she walked toward the small cabinet located across from her bed.

“Would you like some wine?” she asked as she poured herself a glass.

“Sure”

I was beginning to feel a little uncomfortable, wondering if she regretted inviting me to her house. She seemed so different all of a sudden.

We sat on one of her couches with our wine and I wondered if I should offer to leave. I wasn’t sure if I knew how to get back to my hotel from here, especially at night.

“Why are you here Michael?” she asked seriously

“I can go.” I said quickly, setting down my glass of wine

“No” she smiled “I meant why are you in Paris?” she clarified

“I…I don’t know” I answered honestly “My mother died a few months ago and I just needed to get away. This is where I ended up.”

Her expression softened.

“Did you leave anybody behind?” she asked.

I wasn’t sure what she meant.

“Not really” I replied, my father didn’t count.

“No girlfriend?” she probed.

Immediately my thoughts jumped to the beautiful waitress I had seen just before leaving San Diego. It annoyed me. Why would I think of her?

“No” I answered

“So what’s next?” she asked.

It seemed as if she was trying to decide something about me.

“Whatever life brings, I suppose. I have no real plans.”

It sounded more desolate than I intended. She reached her hand over and began gently stroking my hair near the base of my neck. It was soothing. Maybe it was the wine, or the exhaustion from the day, but before I knew it I had fallen asleep.

To my surprise I didn’t dream of all the amazing sights I had seen that day. I didn’t even dream of this strange exotic woman I had just met. Instead I dreamt of the one person who had consumed all my dreams since
the day I first saw
her. I dreamt of the beautiful waitress from back home.

My second date with Jared had been a double date with Amy and Dan. It was comfortable and fun. As I had hoped, having Amy and Dan there had eliminated any expectation of a romantic ending to the date. From then on, all of our dates were group outings. It didn’t even really feel like dating, nothing formal like that first night, just hanging out with friends.

I liked Jared, he was nice and funny and easy to be around, but my feelings for him were nothing more than friendship. Our relationship was comfortable but undefined. He would always put his arm around me when we sat together, and attempted to hold my hand at every chance he got. But that is where our intimacy stopped.

I avoided any situation that would put us alone together, and I could tell that it bothered him but he never pushed the issue. Sometimes I wondered if it would be easier to just go ahead and have that awkward conversation about how we would never be more than friends, but I guess I was too much of a coward. I didn’t want to hurt his feelings and he seemed content enough with how things were.

Jared and Dan had a great apartment off-campus. Amy and I hung out over there all the time. I wondered why Amy still lived in the dorms with me. I knew she could easily afford a nice apartment like theirs. I asked her about it once and she just shrugged and said she liked living with me.

Amy got me a job with the catering company she worked for. It had been hard to leave the coffee shop. It felt like I was leaving behind any chance of ever seeing my mystery man again, but it was time for me to move on.

I had been working as an assistant chef for the catering company for about 6 months. I was surprised by how much I enjoyed cooking and how good I was at it. I started cooking at Jared and Dan’s place all the time. I loved trying out different recipes.

Pastries and deserts were my favorite thing to experiment with. The guys were always eager taste-testers for all my new creations. My life was finally falling back into a happy routine.

I was even beginning to see my future after college taking shape. I had decided on culinary school. The Art Institute of California had a great culinary program. Amy was looking into the Fashion Institute of Design and Merchandising. Both were located in San Diego, and we had found a nice apartment that was pretty well centered between the two.

My boss picked up on my ability to create fantastic deserts and that had quickly become my responsibility for all of our catering events. But when we booked a wedding I was surprised that he told me my job would be the cake. I had never made a wedding cake before. I began studying cake design books, and practiced for weeks with smaller versions. The guys loved eating my practice cakes.

Finally I made the real thing. It was a 6-tier masterpiece, each tier a square designed to look like a wrapped gift. I was so proud of it. I couldn’t believe how well it turned out. My boss took one look at it and told me I was a natural.

“I hope they like it” I said nervously, peering out the kitchen doors into the large banquet hall. It was time to reveal the cake.

“Relax” Amy told me “They’ll love it. It’s absolutely beautiful! I had no idea you had such an artistic talent.”

“Neither did I.” I admitted laughing nervously.

She smiled at me one last time as her and one of the other servers carried my cake out of the kitchen. I anxiously watched the faces of the people in the room. Most looked impressed. I held my breath waiting for someone to look disappointed. No one did.