Maikoda: Power of the Moon (Blue Moon Trilogy Book 2) (3 page)

              “See, I’m okay.”  She peered closer to the girl, breathing in the sweet scent of innocence. “Want to check?”

              Nali giggled and shook her head, then quickly wrapped her arms around Layla’s waist in a fierce hug. 

              “Good,” Layla stroked her head. “Now let’s go get something to eat.” She smiled as she returned the hug, giving Nali a tight squeeze before the little girl jumped out the bed and sped out the room.

              Brett stood outside the door, his lean body blocking her way as she tried to pass. He reached for her hand, stopping her. “You sure you’re okay?” He smoothed the hair away from her face. 

              Her mind a jumble of thoughts and emotions, she turned her face away and nodded. To be honest, she had no clue if she was okay or not. And she did not want him to see her so weak. She was supposed to be the daughter of a god—the god—the first Were who fathered them all. And here she was crying? Because of what? A stupid dream she couldn’t even remember? A hug from a child she barely knew?

              He stared into her eyes like he knew she was holding something back. It was a look he seemed to wear more and more often since they had fought Suzette. But so far, he had not addressed it, instead he allowed her to continue to lie to him, allowed them to fall apart. 

“Then what was that last night? You haven’t had that nightmare before, have you?”

              She shook her head. “No, I don’t think so, but to be honest, I haven’t been remembering my dreams of late. Actually, I don’t think I’ve really been sleeping either.” She ignored what his frown might mean. If he was worried about her lack of dream memories, then it might be a bigger problem than she was allowing herself to believe.

              “Why didn’t you tell me?” Frustration tinged his voice and her wolf bristled, even as she tried to relax.
              “Look, it’s not a big deal. It’s just a few dreams I don’t remember.” She shrugged.

              “Nothing?” he persisted. “Not even the one from last night?”

              She shook her head. “Nothing. I mean, I remember being terrified and wanting to run away, but I don’t know what it was that scared me or why I was so afraid. But,” she waved a dismissive hand, “it’s not important. It’s not like it makes any difference. Either way, our goal is the same.”

              He held onto her hand as she tried to move away. “You are the daughter of a god who communed with the heavens through dreams. Of course the dreams are important, Layla—!”

              “Brett, stop! It’s not that important!” Her head throbbed again in earnest and she brushed past him pulling her hand from his. “The only thing I remember from last night is one word. One. Single. Word. Hania. And I don’t even know what it means.”

              She walked away and missed the look of shock on Brett’s face.

*

              Martin stared at Layla as she walked into the room. “Everything okay?”

              Layla stopped in her tracks and sighed before turning on her heel and walking away. Even though she was being rude, she was getting tired of everyone asking her if she was okay. She was okay. There were only so many ways she could say it. She wasn’t naïve enough not to know that Martin had most likely eavesdropped on her conversation with Brett, the same way she knew he wasn’t afraid to let her know that he had.

              Walking outside, she sat on the steps leading to the farmhouse, allowing the cool breeze to enter her lungs.  Perhaps being cooped up here was what was driving her crazy.  She wanted to get out, to let her wolf run…to do something. Instead, she had to hide. Hide like a coward while Suzette healed and recruited more Weres to her side. Deep down she knew this was their best course of action; too many Weres were looking for her. She had to stay safe until she was able to harness her Gifts and fight, but it still reeked of cowardice and it felt like they were doing nothing but waiting.

              The hesitant step on the wooden deck made her look up and she braced herself as her aunt sat next to her. The older woman reminded her so much of her mother that sometimes Layla felt as if the other woman was back in her life. Her aunt’s blonde hair had grown longer over the past month, becoming wild and free, and, Layla thought, starting to look like her mother’s.

              “They only want to help, you know,” Susan’s voice was soft as she spoke. “They both care for you and they want to protect you.” 

              Layla sighed and nodded. “I know, but it is so frustrating to have everyone ask if you’re okay all the time. Yes, I was attacked. Yes, I was almost killed. And yes, I found out about my father. But since I can’t change any of it, I might as well accept it. And I have.” She looked over at her aunt. “If only everyone else could too.”

              Susan rubbed her arms at the sudden breeze which picked up at Layla’s outburst. “Cherish these moments, Layla.  It could be worse. They could not care about you at all.”

              “Well, it could always be worse.”  Layla quipped, but smiled nonetheless.  She got her aunt’s point and while it made perfect sense, she was just antsy, wanting something to happen. Pulling her legs to her, she wrapped her arms around them and rested her chin atop her knees. Her eyes never left the line of trees as she spoke. 

              “Everything is so complicated now. A few months ago, I was just trying to get my college degree. Now…well, you know.” 

              Susan ruffled her hair similarly to the way Layla had ruffled Nali’s earlier. “When your mom died, everyone around me asked for weeks how I was feeling. It annoyed me to no end.” She paused, lost in her memories. 

              “It was the same when my children were killed in that car accident. I wanted to clobber the next person who asked me if I was okay. How could I be okay when my children had just died? How could I be okay when my baby sister had been murdered?” she shrugged. “But as pissed as I felt, I knew I would have felt worse if no one had cared to ask at all.”

              Layla pondered her aunt’s words. “I’m not okay,” she said finally, the admittance feeling like a weight removed from her chest. 

              Her aunt nodded. “I know.”

              She looked back at the woman who had raised her after her mom had been killed. “You know?”

              Susan patted her arm. “Honey, I’ve been there, remember? I know that no matter how many times you say, ‘I’m okay’, when it comes to death, you’re really not.” She smiled softly. “You just want some time to yourself to figure things out. It’s part of our nature. We Donovan women are an independent lot.” 

              She patted Layla’s arm again. “Unfortunately, we tend to pick men who want to coddle and protect us. Gets annoying really quickly.”  She laughed and stole a quick glance towards the house.

              Layla glanced back as well. She didn’t see anyone, but Martin could hear them and was probably listening. Brett’s powers were more limited, but if he was in the living room, he could certainly hear every word that passed between the two of them. 

              “I guess the problem is that now I don’t know what to do.”

              Susan nodded as Layla continued.

              “Last month, it was all about finding and stopping Suzette. That was the purpose. That was our goal. I knew what I had to do. No matter what else came up; school, issues with my job, even you and Nali, the main goal was to stop Suzette.” The words seemed to tumble out of her mouth as all her insecurities came to the surface. 

              “Now, we don’t know where Suzette is, we don’t know if she is still a threat, we have no idea who’s been hiding her and unless Alaska has shrunk in the past few days, I have no idea where to find my father.” She took a deep breath and slowly stretched her legs. “Everything is so up in the air.”

              “It’s all so confusing because there is no concrete plan.” Susan’s hand was warm and comforting hand on Layla’s back. 

              “Exactly!”  Layla exhaled slowly, a bit perturbed at her adolescent outburst. Before she could apologize, her aunt chuckled.

              “Think of it this way. We are waiting. That’s the plan. Sooner or later, one of the feelers Martin has put out will make a connection and you will definitely have lots to do then. So for now, let’s focus on work, school, and you finishing your classes. You may not think they are worthwhile now, but it’s something to do to keep you focused and it could be something to fall back on when all this is over.”

              Layla scoffed at the idea. Work and school were the furthest things from her mind, but her aunt was right. It would give her something to do, something to occupy her mind and bide her time. She did need the money. She was tired of living off Martin and although his funds were considerable, she wanted her own. 

              Besides, she was almost done with school. A few more months and she would not have to worry about it any longer. She would have her degree, although chances were that she wouldn’t even be able to enjoy her degree. After all, she was basically a dead werewolf walking if it were up to Suzette and Kuruk.

              Commencement was in a few months and all she had left were the classes she was currently enrolled in.  At least the school had given her an additional week off for bereavement after her friends and co-worker had been killed by Suzette. But still, she would have to double her efforts in order to graduate on time. She sighed and looked back at her aunt.

              “How are you so okay with this?” Susan knew nothing about Weres and for her to be so understanding that someone like Suzette was after her was just crazy.  It wasn’t like she didn’t want to share that part of her life, she just didn’t want her aunt in any more danger than she needed to be.

              The older woman chuckled. “Honey, I’ve been on this earth long enough to know that there are just some nutjobs out there.  This woman killed your mom and then came back for you but without proof we can’t bring the police in.” The wind whipped through the trees again as if echoing her frustration. 

              “So, if the only way to get this bitch is through Martin, then that’s what we have to do. Even if we have to wait to do it.”  She patted Layla’s knee and stood up.

              Even if we have to wait. The words reverberated in the air. Sometimes life really sucked.

*

              Brett was propped against the window, a thoughtful expression on his face, when she entered their room after her talk with her aunt. Her mind was awash with the words spoken by the other woman. She was worrying too much. Perhaps that was why she was having such problems sleeping and such horrible headaches. Silently crossing to the bed, she sat down, waiting for him to talk, somehow knowing that he wanted to say something to her. 

              Her bitchiness earlier was inexcusable and even though she wanted to apologize with every fiber of her being, the words seemed stuck. She glanced at her nails, the short tips bare and chipped. Her finger caught as she ran it across one of the tips and she played with the broken nail as she tried to find the words to say to him. 

              She looked up at his sigh. His eyes bored into hers, the wood from the window sill firm against his back. They roamed over her face and she kept her expression blank even as she knew what he would see. Heavy circles under her eyes, limp hair damp from sweat, her skin sallow with worry. 

              He wanted her to trust him, to confide in him. But she couldn’t. Even as she told him how much she loved him, she could not let him in. The words wouldn’t come. Everyone she had ever loved had left her and she could not bear it if he did too. 

              The look on his face told her so much more than his words ever could. He felt like an outsider, someone she’d just met instead of the man she was in a relationship with. He wanted her to want him. Not only in her bed but in her heart. Like she was in his.

              “What?”

              Layla jerked back from her thoughts as Brett finally spoke. Where had that come from? How was she able to know what he was feeling? It was as if she was able to sense his deepest desires for her and it was unnerving how real it felt. As if she was really picking up on his emotions.

              “Nothing.”

              Brett snorted. “Really? Nothing?” he straightened abruptly, angrily, and Layla was suddenly pissed at his attitude. 

              He wasn’t the one who was bending over backwards; she was sacrificing her entire life for a war that was never hers. Martin and Brett had come into her life and turned it upside down in a matter of days and he was acting like he had a problem with her? 

              “Do you even still care about me?”

              She closed her eyes to put a check on the sarcastic response threatening to fall from her lips. “I do care about you.”

              “Doesn’t seem like it.”

              This time she bit her lip to stop herself from snapping and causing an argument. She took a deep, cleansing breath. 

              “I do care about you Brett; it’s just that I don’t want to talk about my feelings every second. It’s not like I am holding back from you.” She stood up and walked over to him. “I love being with you. If I didn’t, you wouldn’t have to ask that question. You would know.”