Me and My Sisters (15 page)

‘You must lead a fabulous life,’ she gushed.

‘I do, actually,’ I admitted, sipping my champagne and enjoying every second of this indulgence.

‘And you have such an awesome figure – you’re so tiny. All the clothes are going to look beautiful on you. You’re stunning.’

‘Thank you.’ I basked in her admiration.

While I put my feet up, Bernice left to go through the shop floor and came back twenty minutes later wheeling a large rail of clothes for me to try on. Everything was gorgeous. I could have bought the entire rack … I almost did.

I bought a charcoal grey Moschino coat, two Marc Jacobs jackets – one black, one midnight blue – three pairs of dVb jeans (blue, black and white), a sexy fitted black Dolce & Gabbana dress, two white and two black Prada shirts, an incredible silver Vera Wang evening gown from her Lavender collection, a pair of black Jimmy Choo boots, a pair of Donna Karan wedge sandals and a pair of silver Manolo Blahnik evening shoes to go with my Vera Wang dress. I also bought two Donna Karan casual daytime dresses and two Juicy tracksuits (one pink and one baby blue). The bill came to $11,087.

I winced a bit at the final cost. I’d never spent that much money in one go before. But Jack had told me to indulge myself and he’d said I deserved it, so what the hell? Besides, Victoria did this all the time and she never felt guilty, so why should I? No: I was going to enjoy it and not ruin the buzz with silly regrets. Jack liked me to look good and that cost money.

I handed over my credit card and waited on the couch while my clothes were wrapped and packaged. Bernice came in and said that as I had so many bags the store wanted to offer me their car to take me back to the hotel. I was accompanied downstairs to where a uniformed driver was waiting in front of a silver Bentley. As I climbed into the back seat, I felt like a movie star. People on the street were turning around to see who I was. It felt fantastic.

13

Julie

I picked up the triplets from Montessori and we were driving home when Luke asked, ‘Mum, does God love everyone?’

‘Yes, He does.’

‘Even bad guys?’ Leo asked.

‘Yes.’

‘Even robbers?’ Liam wanted to know.

‘Yes, He loves everyone.’

‘Even when people are bold?’

‘Yes. It’s just like I love you guys even when you do naughty things.’

‘Even when you put us in the bold room?’ Leo asked.

‘Yes.’

‘Even when you shout at us?’ Luke wasn’t convinced.

‘Yes.’

‘Even when you say, “I’m sick of this shit”?’ Liam reminded me of my bad language.

‘I don’t say that.’

‘Yes, you do – you said it this morning when Luke took all his clothes off and ran into the garden.’

‘Well, that was bold of me. I shouldn’t say bad words.’

‘Do you love us even when you say, “I hate my life”?’ Leo sounded worried.

‘Yes, I do. Listen, boys, sometimes Mummy says things she doesn’t mean, so you mustn’t take any notice. I don’t hate my life. I love my life. And I love you very much.’

‘Even when you say you want to go to Brazil by your own self?’ Luke persisted.

Yikes, I really needed to watch my mouth from now on.

‘Yes, pet. And you know I’d never go anywhere without you guys. I really, really love you and I know that I shout a lot and I know that I can be grumpy and I’m sorry about that. I’m just tired and sometimes when you’re tired you can be snappy. So I’m going to try and be less grumpy and I want you to try and be really good and do what I say. OK?’

‘Do you love us more than God?’ Leo asked.

‘I love you more than anyone.’

‘But God’s not a person. He’s invisible,’ he reminded me.

‘Yes, that’s true.’

‘Where does God live?’ Liam wanted to know.

‘In Heaven.’

‘Where is that?’

‘In the sky.’

‘In a cloud?’ Luke was amazed.

‘Kind of.’

‘If we went in an aeroplane, would we see God?’

‘No, you never see Him, but He can see you.’

‘Does He have X-ray eyes?’ Liam asked.

‘Well, yes, in a way He does.’

‘Cool,’ they all said.

We pulled into the house before the interrogation could go on any longer. They were insatiable. Last year we had gone on a disastrous family holiday to Kerry where it had rained all day, every day. On the five-hour car journey there, the triplets had asked me and Harry endless questions about outer space. After two hours we had cracked, pulled into a garage and bought them piles of sweets to shut them up.

Now, as I was parking, I asked, ‘Who do you love, boys?’

‘Daddy!’ they said in unison. I tried not to let it upset me, but it really did. I broke my back day in and day out for them, but they loved Harry more.

My father was waiting for me at the house. He never called in so this was very unusual.

‘Is everything OK?’ I asked, jumping out of the car.

‘All fine. I just need to talk to you about Louise. Your mother is driving me round the bend. She wants us all to fly to New York and confront this ex-boyfriend of hers.’

‘Oh, God! Come on in. You can help me make sandwiches for the boys and then we can chat.’

While Dad made ham sandwiches, I put Tom down for his nap. When I got back to the kitchen Liam was complaining that his crusts hadn’t been cut off, Luke was shouting that he wanted his sandwich in triangles, not rectangles, and Leo was telling Dad he hated bread and wanted a cracker sandwich.

‘Here’s your mother now. She’ll sort you out.’ Dad looked relieved to see me. ‘I don’t know how you do it,’ he said. ‘I’ve only been here ten minutes and I’m worn out.’

‘You get used to it,’ I admitted, fixing the sandwiches and handing them to the boys just the way they liked them.

Dad removed a pile of laundry from one of the chairs and sat down. ‘Right, about Louise and the baby. What do you know about the father?’

‘Nothing,’ I lied.

‘There never was a boyfriend, was there?’ Dad looked directly at me.

I could feel myself blushing. ‘I don’t really know,’ I mumbled.

‘I thought so. She was so casual about the break-up and doing it all on her own that I suspected there was no man. Is it one of those sperm banks she went to?’

‘No!’ I cringed. How did Dad even know about sperm banks? I really did not want to discuss sperm donors with him. I was going to kill Louise for putting me in this situation.

‘A married man?’ Dad asked.

‘God, no, nothing like that.’

‘What was it, then?’

‘It was just kind of a brief fling.’

‘A one-night stand, you mean?’

Now I was discussing casual shags with my father who had never said the word ‘sex’ in front of me in thirty-nine years. ‘Something like that,’ I muttered.

‘How could someone as bright and sensible as Louise do something so stupid?’

‘We all make mistakes,’ I defended my sister.

‘Louise has never put a foot wrong in her life.’

‘Well, I guess there’s a first time for everything. But it’s worked out well. She seems pretty happy about the baby.’

‘She has no idea what raising a child alone is like,’ Dad said.

‘Neither do you,’ I pointed out. ‘Maybe it won’t be so bad. She’s loads of help lined up and she’s very organized and capable. If anyone can make it work, Louise can.’

‘Where did I go wrong? One fella hugging trees, and my eldest having unprotected sex. What type of children did I raise?’

I needed to get him off the sex talk. ‘Louise will be fine and so will Gavin. He’s off to London soon anyway, so he’ll be out of your hair.’

‘Off to London to sit around on his arse doing more protesting.’

‘Well, the expansion at Heathrow airport is a bad idea. You should go on to the Greenpeace site. It has a very convincing list of reasons to ban it. In a way you have to admire him for being so passionate about it.’

‘Passionate?’ Dad spluttered. ‘The only reason he’s going is because of that gobshite Forest’s sister. His penis is controlling his brain.’

‘Well, she is pretty gorgeous.’

‘Stunning. If I were his age, I’d be tempted to go and live in a field with her, but the point is, he needs to cop on and stop being so easily influenced by other people. I did not spend thousands of pounds on his education for him to end up living in a tent, regardless of how good-looking his tent-mate is.’

‘Gavin likes his creature comforts far too much. Don’t worry, Dad, he’ll be back home soon.’

Dad was on a roll now. He plonked his coffee cup down. ‘I’d understand if he wanted to get into politics and become a lobbyist. Or if he studied science or chemistry and worked on finding alternative energy sources. But sitting around in trees or fields protesting is a waste of time.’

‘Give him a chance. He’s only just out of college. Everyone needs to explore and experiment while they find out what they really want to do.’

‘I set up my printing company when I was nineteen. I didn’t have time to go around
finding
myself. Kids these days have far too much time on their hands. They’re spoilt and indulged. They have no concept of reality, of hard times, of making ends meet. That’s the problem with Gavin – he’s been spoilt all his life. Your mother and I were too old and tired by the time he came along to discipline him. He got away with murder.’

‘Well, that’s true. You were definitely much stricter with us girls – he had it very easy. Look, I know he’s a bit immature and has no concept of working and managing money or anything like that, but he’s a good guy. He’ll find his way. He just needs the space to do it.’

‘Well, he’d better hurry up. I want him to get a proper job, start earning money and taking responsibility for himself.’

‘I dunno, Dad. If I was him I’d stay as carefree as I could for as long as possible. Budgeting and paying bills and a mortgage aren’t really a whole lot of fun.’

‘He can’t be a student all his life. You three girls were living away from home and being independent by the time you were Gavin’s age.’

‘Well, I bet you after a month he’ll come screaming home to a bed, hot meals and clean clothes. He’s not cut out for sleeping in mud and building camp fires to cook tofu on.’

Dad laughed. ‘He’ll die without his cooked breakfast every morning. Now, what am I going to tell your mother about Louise? I’m supposed to come back with the baby’s father’s details.’

‘Couldn’t you tell her I was out?’

‘I was warned not to come home without the information.’

‘Tell her to call Louise. I don’t want to get stuck in the middle of this.’

‘Louise won’t return her calls.’

‘Maybe you should just tell her the truth.’

‘If I tell her that her eldest daughter, the Cambridge scholar, got pregnant on a one-night encounter, she’ll go mad and I’ll never hear the end of it.’

‘Well, then, tell her that –’

Marian walked through the back door with her four kids in tow, interrupting my flow. Shoot! I’d forgotten we had arranged a play-date.

‘Hey, Mr D, how’s it going?’

‘Hi, Marian, how are you? I see you’ve been busy since I last saw you.’ He pointed at baby Ben.

‘You’d think I’d have got my tubes tied in a fucking knot after Molly, but I stupidly didn’t and now here I am, breast-feeding at forty-one, I’m too old for this.’

‘Well, I’m glad to see the fourth child hasn’t mellowed you.’ Dad chuckled.

‘The only time I’m mellow is when I’ve had six drinks. Listen, I can come back later if you guys want to chat.’

‘No, it’s fine – we’re just talking about Louise’s one-night stand.’ I filled her in.

Dad looked a bit surprised that Marian knew all about my slutty sister.

‘Don’t sweat it, Mr D. I’m the soul of discretion. Julie and I tell each other everything. It gets us through the day. And, believe me, the days are bloody endless.’

Oscar came over and said he was thirsty. I got up to get him a drink.

‘Sit down,’ Marian ordered me. ‘Oscar, you’ve just had lunch and drunk a litre of apple juice. Now go outside and play and don’t come and annoy me until the first number on your digital watch says two.’ Marian ushered the triplets, Molly, Brian and Oscar outside. ‘Go on, go out and get some fresh air,’ she said, as she pushed them through the door and closed it behind them.

‘It’s very cold out there,’ Dad pointed out.

‘Oi, come here.’ Marian threw their coats outside after them and closed the door again. ‘If they’re cold they’ll have to run around more to keep warm and they’ll burn off more energy. So, what’s going on with Louise?’

‘Dad is trying to figure out how to tell Mum that her eldest daughter is a slapper. She’s not going to react well to the truth.’

Marian sat back and thought about it for a minute. ‘I know – why don’t you tell her that she had a short relationship with this American guy in London and that he gave her his number and address, but when she tried to contact him after he’d gone back to New York, she realized he’d given her false information. That way, Louise wasn’t a slut. She was just taken for a ride by a charming arsehole. With no number, no address and not even his real name, there’s no way of tracking him down.’

‘Impressive,’ Dad said.

‘I watch a lot of old police shows late at night when I’m up with the baby. You’d be amazed what you pick up.’

‘It could work, Dad.’ It was the best idea we’d come up with so far.

‘I agree,’ he said.

‘If you want anything else sorted out, you know who to come to. If only I could sort out my own life.’

‘What’s up?’ Dad asked.

‘My mother-in-law is coming to stay for two weeks. She thinks Greg is the Messiah and I’m the devil incarnate. She thinks I should be down on my knees thanking God for giving Greg to me. She thinks a wife’s place is in the kitchen with an apron on, baking apple pie with a smile on her face. The last time she came to stay I handed Greg a bowl of Crunchy Nut Corn Flakes for dinner and she nearly had a fucking seizure. All the kids had chickenpox and I hadn’t been able to leave the house for days. She started telling me that poor Greg needed a decent meal after being out working all day. Why hadn’t I gone to the shops and cooked him something nice? I pointed out that my kids looked like they had the plague and the doctor had told me to keep them inside for a few days, and she started telling me that I should have batches of pre-cooked meals in the freezer for emergencies like this.’

‘She’s dead right.’ Dad winked at me. ‘A wife’s duty is to look after her husband and children. No matter what kind of day my wife Anne had, she always produced a lovely meal for me when I got home.’

‘People like her should be shot. She’s making women like me look bad.’

Although Dad was winding Marian up, it was true: Mum had always managed to cook dinner for us every night, even with four kids and doing the books for Dad’s company. I have no idea how she did it, but she also managed to look smart all the time.

‘You modern women want it all – college, careers, husbands, babies and domestic harmony. It doesn’t work like that,’ Dad told us.

‘Hang on there, Mr D, I gave up my job to have babies and look after them. When I worked, I managed a team of twenty-five people, no problem. Now I look after four kids and I can barely get dressed. It’s a lot harder than it looks.’

‘You also have your mum to look after,’ I noted.

‘Is she unwell?’ Dad asked.

‘She’s been depressed since my dad left in 1979. She’s very optimistic, though. She spends all day looking out the window thinking he’s going to come home. Strangely, after nearly thirty-two years of no-show, I don’t share her faith.’

‘That must have been hard for you,’ Dad said.

Marian shrugged. ‘I was ten when it happened. I don’t really remember him. I feel sorry for my mother. It’s a waste of a life. When my kids were born all she said was “It’s a pity your dad’s not here to see them. He loved children.” I just about managed to stop myself pointing out that he obviously wasn’t too fucking crazy about them, seeing as he left me and my brother behind.’

‘Does your brother have children?’ Dad asked.

‘No,’ Marian said. ‘He’s gay. My mother thinks it’s a phase. She still believes that Rock Hudson was straight and that he died of cancer, not Aids. She thinks Elizabeth Taylor spun the story to make herself look like Florence Nightingale, coming in to save her friend Rock.’