Me and My Sisters (17 page)

‘Sweet dreams. Think of beating him to death with his polo stick or something.’

‘Sounds good to me.’

The next day a sheepish Eduardo signed the agreement and I got the first plane out of there.

15

Sophie

I packed everything I needed for the three days in London and left some room in the case for new purchases. I probably wouldn’t have that much time to shop, but I was hoping to have a quick look in Selfridges the morning after Louise’s baby was born.

Jess hadn’t freaked out about me leaving because Jack was at home and had promised to look after her every day and have dinner with her on the two nights I was gone.

‘OK, Mummy, I understand that you want to be with Louise for her baby because she has no husband.’

‘Thanks, Jess. I know Daddy will take good care of you.’

Jack put his arm around Jess. ‘We’ll have a great time. I’ll even watch
The Princess and the Frog
with you,’ he promised.

‘The whole way through? With no computer?’ Jess looked thrilled. Jack always had his laptop with him.

‘The whole thing – and I promise to leave my computer in my office.’

‘Ooooh, great. Can we have popcorn?’

‘Yes, angel, we can.’

‘And jellies?’

‘Yes.’

‘OK, but only a few,’ I warned.

‘Of course.’ Jack winked at Jess.

I put my coat on. ‘It sounds to me like you’re going to have great fun. I kind of wish I wasn’t going now.’

‘Come on, you can’t miss Louise becoming a mum. I’m dying to hear how it goes. I just can’t picture it. She’s such a career woman. I don’t see her turning into Mother Earth. I think she’d be terrifying to have as a mother.’

‘That’s a bit harsh. She has a softer side.’ I fastened my buttons.

‘Really? She hides it well.’

‘She’s just very independent.’

‘Look, I admire what she’s achieved. It’s seriously impressive. I just think her talent lies in the law, not babies.’

‘Louise is so capable, I’m sure she’ll make it work. Although I do think three weeks’ maternity leave is crazy.’

‘I agree. Remember how difficult you found it in the beginning? You were all over the place.’

I bristled. ‘It’s very stressful at first, when you don’t know what you’re doing.’

‘Well, as you say, Louise is very capable so she’ll probably cope better than other women. Thank God you managed to get back to yourself so soon. Some of the guys I know said their wives went to pieces. They didn’t get dressed for months, got fat and grumpy and nagged them every time they walked through the door.’

I turned around to pick up my bag. If only you knew, I thought.

I’d told the others I’d meet them in the airport. Mum and Dad were bringing Gavin and there was no way I was picking up Julie. She never arrived until the last minute. When we were younger we went on this one family holiday to Spain – it was a really big deal, a huge treat. Julie wandered off in the airport and we all got into a total panic looking for her. The airport security was calling her name over the intercom, but she was completely oblivious to it. She eventually strolled up to the boarding gate with ten seconds to spare. It took Dad the whole two-hour flight to calm down.

The other reason I didn’t offer to pick up Julie was because I didn’t want to sit beside her on the plane. I knew it was mean, but she was bringing Tom and I just did not want to be covered with yoghurt and dribble. Neither did I want to play peek-a-boo for an hour. I wanted to read the new catwalk special
Elle
magazine in peace.

I arrived at the airport early, bought some magazines and a low-fat soy-milk latte and sat down to wait. Twenty minutes later, Mum, Dad and Gavin arrived.

‘Oh, my God! What did you do to your hair?’ I asked my brother.

‘I don’t want to talk about it.’ He pulled down his hat.

Tight curly ringlets were sprouting out from under it. ‘Did you get a perm?’ It looked ridiculous.

‘I asked the dickhead hairdresser for dreadlocks.’

‘And he gave you ringlets?’ I tried not to laugh.

‘It’s so humiliating.’ Gavin groaned. ‘The dude was a total amateur.’

‘I dunno – the Shirley Temple look suits you.’ Dad snorted.

‘Seriously, Dad, this is not funny. I do not want Acorn to see me like this.’

‘Why did you go to a hairdresser who clearly has no idea what he’s doing?’ I asked.

‘He was cheap.’

‘There’s a reason for that,’ I noted.

‘I know that
now
! I look like a total dork and I’m meeting Acorn this afternoon. What the hell am I going to do? She’ll dump me when she sees the state of me.’

‘Don’t worry. I can straighten it with my GHD when we get to the hotel. We’ll have you looking normal before you see her.’

‘Really? That’ll work? Oh, thank God! You’re a life-saver, Sophie!’

‘How long are you planning to stay in London?’ I asked.

He shrugged. ‘Dunno, really – until they stop the Heathrow expansion plan, I guess.’

‘Or until I go over there and kick your arse back home,’ Dad muttered.

‘He’s promised to come home in August and look for a real job,’ Mum said.

‘Thanks for the support. I’m actually trying to save the planet from pollution and meltdown for your grandchildren. Louise’s kid will be sucking diesel if this airport expansion goes through.’

‘You can donate half your salary to any cause you want when you get a decent job.’ Dad glared at him.

‘Did you not see
An Inconvenient Truth
?’ Gavin asked.

‘No. I watch films to be entertained, not depressed,’ Dad retorted.

‘You have to get on board, Dad. We’re talking about the future of the planet. You can’t ignore it. It’s your generation’s fault that we’re in this mess. We have to get the governments to facilitate a low-carbon economy. The developed world has to lead the way in tackling these challenges and show the developing world how to do it.’

‘Did you swallow a Greenpeace brochure?’ I asked.

‘You lot are always blaming my generation for everything,’ Dad barked. ‘Let me tell you something. The world is a lot better today than it used to be. I happen to think planes are fantastic. I like travelling. I have no intention of giving it up. And, in case you hadn’t noticed, you’re about to board a plane to get to your demonstration. If you feel that strongly about carbon footprint, why didn’t you put your togs on and swim across the shagging Irish Sea?’

‘There’s no point talking to you – you’re a lost cause.’ Gavin crossed his arms in defiance.

‘It would appear that the pot is calling the kettle black,’ Dad replied.

‘OK, guys. That’s enough. Just agree to disagree.’ I interrupted them before it got really heated.

Our flight was called. Still no sign of Julie. I rang her mobile. No answer.

‘I hope she doesn’t miss the flight,’ Mum said. ‘She’s the only one who can get through to Louise. I want her to persuade Louise to let me be there for the birth.’

‘Mum, Louise wants to be on her own. You have to let it go,’ I said.

‘You’ve had a child, Sophie. Would you have liked to be alone when Jessica was born?’

‘No, but Louise is different from me. She likes doing things on her own.’

‘Just talk to her.’

‘She doesn’t listen to me.’

‘Try harder,’ Mum said firmly.

They announced our flight would soon be boarding. Just as I was about to try Julie’s mobile again, she came hurtling around the corner. Tom was in his buggy, wearing pyjamas covered with Weetabix. Julie’s hair was wet. She was wearing jeans that were too tight for her, and an old sweatshirt that said ‘Greece ’98’ on it. ‘Thank God I didn’t miss it. I was so scared I would.’ She looked completely strung out.

‘Sit down here and catch your breath,’ Mum said. ‘Why are you so late?’

Julie sat down. ‘The triplets put my passport down the loo.’

‘Little buggers,’ Dad said.

‘I was having a ten-second shower, and when I got out I saw it floating. So I had to fish it out and dry it with the hair-drier.’

‘Why didn’t you just bring your driving licence instead?’ Dad asked.

‘Because Luke coloured the entire thing in with black marker a month ago and I haven’t had time to replace it.’

‘It’s a bloody zoo,’ Dad mumbled.

‘Then, while I was drying my passport,’ Julie continued, ‘Liam poured a smoothie into my suitcase, so I had to take the clothes out and repack.’

‘Where was Harry?’ I asked.

‘He’d gone to the shops – we’d run out of milk and bread. I was terrified they wouldn’t let me through security with my soggy passport.’

‘Sit down there and drink this.’ Mum handed Julie her tea, and picked Tom up from the floor where he was about to put a filthy lollipop he’d found into his mouth.

Julie took a sip of tea and sighed deeply. ‘It would be really nice, just for once, to be able to leave the house without utter chaos. You had four kids, Mum. When does it get easier?’

‘I spaced mine out, pet. You were unlucky to have three at the same time. It’s hard for you. Maybe you should consider boarding school.’

‘That’s a great idea. It would make your life so much easier,’ I agreed. With the triplets away all week, Julie would get her life back.

‘Believe me, I’ve thought about it, but it costs a fortune and we’re skint. Anyway, I’d probably miss the scallywags.’

Tom came over to me. He was about to put two sticky hands on my new dVb jeans. I jumped back, spun him around before he did any damage, then lifted him up and plonked him on Julie’s knee. I didn’t want him near me. Thank God I’d checked in early.

‘Jesus, Gavin, what did you do to your hair?’ Julie asked. ‘You look less like Jason Donovan and more like Kylie.’

‘For fuck’s sake.’ Gavin pulled his hat down further.

‘He was trying to get dreadlocks,’ I explained.

‘Was the hairdresser blind?’ Julie grinned.

‘Do you think Acorn will dump me?’ Gavin asked.

‘I’d say she might,’ Julie mused, ‘considering that she looks like Angelina Jolie, only hotter, and you now look ridiculous.’

‘Cheers, Julie, I feel so much better now.’

Julie put her arm around him. ‘Come on, you know you’ll always be gorgeous to me.’

When we boarded, I was at the front of the plane beside two clean, non-sticky, non-mush-covered businessmen. Perfect. I sat back and circled all the new fashions I liked in
Elle
. The hour flew by.

We shared a black cab to the hotel, which Louise had booked and paid for. It was around the corner from her apartment in Chelsea. I’d never stayed there before because Jack always booked the Dorchester when we were in London, but I knew Louise would choose somewhere nice so I wasn’t worried. The Draycott turned out to be very chic and close to some great shops.

‘Wow.’ Julie grinned as we walked through the stylish lobby.

‘This must be costing her a fortune.’ Gavin whistled.

‘I wanted to stay with Louise in her apartment. I thought this hotel was a ridiculous expense, but she wouldn’t have it.’ Mum sniffed.

‘It looks good to me,’ Dad said, picking up a newspaper.

‘I can’t wait to see my room.’ Julie clapped her hands. ‘It’s so exciting to be away with only one child.’

I checked in first. ‘Hi, I’d like a double bed, not twins,’ I told the receptionist. ‘Also, I don’t want to be near a busy street or close to the air-conditioning vents or the kitchens. I’m sensitive to noise.’

‘You can put me anywhere. I can sleep in a tornado,’ Julie said, over my shoulder.

‘Can we just get on with it?’ Dad huffed.

I went to my room. We had arranged to be downstairs at seven fifteen. We were meeting Louise for dinner at seven thirty and she hated anyone being late. I looked at my watch: it was twenty past five. I had time for a nap and would still have an hour to get ready.

There was a knock on the door. It was Gavin. ‘Dude, you need to sort out my hair.’

‘Sorry, I forgot. Come on in.’

He sauntered in and saw my outfits laid out on the bed. ‘Did you need to pack everything you own? You’re only here for a few days.’

‘I like to have choices so I always pack extra.’

‘You have enough choice there for three weeks.’

‘You like trees, I like clothes. Sit down. Let’s fix this mess.’

I ironed out the awful ringlets and made him presentable. ‘There, she won’t dump you now.’

‘Thanks. I owe you big-time. I swear, Sophie, I am so into Acorn. She’s my perfect woman.’

‘Are you in love with her?’

‘I dunno about love, but definitely in lust. She has a body to die for.’

‘You must like her if you’re willing to live in a tent with her. I wouldn’t even do that for Jack.’

Gavin laughed. ‘Come on, Sophie, you’d do anything for Jack.’

‘Not anything.’

Gavin shrugged. ‘Look, I think it’s cool – you guys have a great thing going. He earns shedloads of cash, you live in an amazing house, drive cool cars, he gives you loads of money to spend and you never nag him or say no to him.’

‘I do say no to Jack.’

‘When?’

I frowned. When was the last time I had said no to Jack? I couldn’t remember. I suppose I didn’t say no to him, but he never said no to me either. Come to think of it, we never argued.

‘Dude, you guys have the perfect relationship. Of all my sisters, I think you’ve got the best set-up by far. You won the lotto when you married Jack. I’d love to marry a millionairess – it’d be so cool never to have to worry about money. Look at poor Julie – she’s always stressed about being broke.’

‘You’re right. I am lucky.’

‘Well, thanks again for sorting my hair. I’ve got to fly. I’m meeting Acorn in twenty minutes.’

‘Hey, Gavin?’

‘Yeah?’

‘Treat her to a few cocktails.’ I handed him a fifty-pound note.

‘You’re the best.’ He kissed my cheek.

‘Have fun, but don’t be late for dinner – you know what Louise is like about time.’

‘I’ll be there.’ He strutted out, flicking back his straight hair.

I climbed into bed and listened. It was quiet. I’d been given a good room. I lay back on the pillows and closed my eyes.

‘“E-I-E-I-O, and on that farm he had a
cat
, E-I-E-I-OOOOOO!”’

No! Julie was singing bloody ‘Old MacDonald Had A Farm’ to Tom. They must be in the room next door. I put a pillow over my head and groaned. I couldn’t exactly call Reception and complain about my own sister’s singing. Damn! I’d wanted to rest before dinner. I put in my ear-plugs but I could still hear her. How did she do it? She looked exhausted and there she was singing and clapping.