Murder Must Advertise (45 page)

A 'bus passed, bearing a long ribbon display upon its side:

The great campaign had begun. He contemplated his work with a kind of amazement. With a few idle words on a sheet of paper he had touched the lives of millions. Two men, passing, stopped to stare at the hoarding.

“What's this Whiffling business, Alf?”

“I dunno. Some advertising stunt or other. Cigarettes, ain't it?”

“Oh, Whifflets?”
[Pg 344]

“I suppose so.”

“Wonderful how they think of it all. What's it about, anyway?”

“Gawd knows. Here, let's get a packet and see.”

“All right. I don't mind.”

They passed on.

Tell England. Tell the world. Eat more Oats. Take Care of your Complexion. No More War. Shine your Shoes with Shino. Ask your Grocer. Children Love Laxamalt. Prepare to meet thy God. Bung's Beer is Better. Try Dogsbody's Sausages. Whoosh the Dust Away. Give them Crunchlets. Snagsbury's Soups are Best for the Troops.
Morning Star
, best Paper by Far. Vote for Punkin and Protect your Profits. Stop that Sneeze with Snuffo. Flush your Kidneys with Fizzlets. Flush your Drains with Sanfect. Wear Wool-fleece next the Skin. Popp's Pills Pep you Up. Whiffle your Way to Fortune
....

Advertise, or go under.