My Brother's Keeper (24 page)

“I don’t know what you’re talking about.”

“You do know. You beat him to death on Grant road five days ago.”

Lenny walked backwards, lost his balance, and fell. “Paper said it was a hit and run.”

“You know it wasn’t.”

“Look, Queer Boy, I don’t know shit about what happened to the retard.” The next shot struck the heel of Lenny’s boot. He scurried back on his elbows, cutting ruts in the mud.

“His name was Rudy.” Ellis walked down the steps. This close he couldn’t miss.

Lenny held up his hands. “Look, I don’t know what you want.”

“What I want is for you to die. But first you’re going to say my brother’s name.”

“You can’t be—”

Ellis aimed at Lenny’s head.

“All right. All right.”

“Say it.”

“R-R-Rudy.”

“Now say what you did to him.” Ellis jabbed at the space between them with the gun. “Say it, goddamn you, or I’ll blow your fucking head off.” The wind shifted throwing Ellis’s hood back. Rain slid down the collar of his jacket. The swell of rage burning inside him made it impossible to feel the cold.

“Ellis.” His name. Jon’s voice. “Ellis, put down the gun.”

Jon stepped in front of the truck. His car sat behind it, engine running, headlights on bright, wipers screaming against the glass with every stroke. When had he gotten here? How did he know where to find him?

“Go away.” Ellis turned his attention back to Lenny. All he had to do was squeeze the trigger. Kill him. End this.

It should have been easy. It was supposed to be easy. Why wasn’t it?

“Ellis…please. Don’t do this.”

“I said go away, Jon.”

“You do this and you’ll throw your life away.”

“And if I don’t, he’ll do this again, and again, and again.” Tears blurred Ellis’s vision and his voice cracked. “It will never stop. Don’t you get it? It will never ever stop until he’s dead.” His arms trembled with effort to keep his aim.

“It won’t be like that.”

“Yes, it will.” Ellis’s scream echoed back from the woods. His voice crumbled and the taste of copper eased up the back of his throat. “I have to do this.” He wasn’t even sure if Jon heard him.

“No, you don’t.” Jon stepped closer. “You don’t, baby, I promise you don’t.”

“I can’t let him get away with this. He killed Rudy.” The muscles in his arms trembled. “I have to…”

Why couldn’t he just pull the trigger and splatter this bastard’s brains all over the grass? He killed Rudy. Only he didn’t just kill him, this monster beat him to death.

“Don’t you see? I don’t have a choice.” Rain clapped against Ellis’s jacket.

“Yes, you do. Please, please, give me the gun.”

Lenny pushed himself to his feet, and the cold feral look of a rabid dog was back in his eyes.

Did he look at Rudy like that?

The next bullet burned a line down the side of Lenny’s boot. He jumped back, lost his balance, and fell face first into the mud.

“You shot me.” Lenny rolled on his side holding his foot. “You fucking shot me, Queer Boy.”

Ellis gritted his teeth. That had been easy. He returned his aim to Lenny’s chest.

Pull the trigger. I just have to pull the trigger.

“Look at me, Ellis.”

“It’s supposed to be easy.” Ellis trembled. “Why isn’t it easy?”

“Because you don’t want to hurt anyone.”

Ellis shook his head, his hair slid into his face. “I have to do this, Jon. Why can’t I do this?” He tried to pull the trigger, but he couldn’t will his finger to move. “That son of a bitch killed Rudy.” He shook the gun at Lenny with every word. “He killed him. He deserves to die.” Ellis lost his hold on the grief and it bubbled out of his chest with a sob. “Why can’t I do it?”

“Because you’re not like him. You care, you love, you’re not cruel.”

Jon put his hand over Ellis’s. His arms collapsed and Jon pried the gun from his fingers.

“C’mon. Let’s go home.” Jon wrapped an arm around Ellis’s ribs.

“This isn’t over.” Lenny started to stand.

Jon raised the gun. “Ellis may be too good of a person to do it, but make no mistake, I’m not. And I will not miss, so don’t make me pull the trigger. Now get on your stomach.”

Lenny hesitated for a moment then went flat on the ground. He held his face up above the mud puddle lapping at his chin.

Jon backed up. “Put your hands on your head and lace your fingers.”

Lenny did.

“Now cross your legs.”

Again he obeyed.

Ellis’s hip bumped Jon’s car.

“You think this is going to keep me from coming after your ass?” Lenny laughed.

“No. I’m willing to bet it won’t, which is why I called Sheriff Marsh.” Jon pulled Ellis around to the passenger side and opened the door. Ellis fell into the seat. “He’s waiting at the end of your driveway with a shotgun and two cop cars.”

Lenny squeezed off a curse.

“That’s right. So I suggest you lay there until I’m long gone.” Jon got in and threw the car in reverse. He drove backwards all the way up the driveway then swung into the street.

A lone sedan sat on the edge of the road.

“Where are the keys?”

Jon’s voice was so far away.

“Ellis, where are the keys to the truck?”

“I left them in the ignition.”

Jon got out. The driver’s window on the sedan rolled down. Jon said something to George, nodded, then came back to the car.

Jon followed George to the old mining path. The sedan pulled to the side of the road again and the passenger door opened. The rain and dark concealed their face.

While they waited for the truck to get behind them, Jon fumbled with the dials on the dash. The heat kicked on, blowing full blast, drying up the steam on the windshield and pushed back the cold.

As soon as the truck was behind them, Jon headed to the four-way toward home.

Ellis waited for Jon to tell him how stupid he was. To yell. To cuss.

The perpetual silence was far worse than anything he could have said.

It wasn’t supposed to be like this. Ellis had lost Rudy and now Jon. And since he’d failed at killing Lenny, he’d lost it all for nothing.

Jon pulled up to the house and opened the car door.

The rain had turned into a freezing mist propelled by a hateful wind.

George’s car pulled in behind them and his friend, Harold, parked the truck. He switched to George’s car.

Jon walked over. The driver’s side window rolled down.

“Is he okay?” George nodded at Jon’s vehicle.

He glanced back. Ellis was still curled in the passenger seat. “I don’t know.”

“That could have ended real bad tonight, Jon.” George’s frown pulled at his entire face. “Thank God, you woke up.”

No, thank Rudy. Jon tucked his hands under his armpits. “I know. We got lucky.” Now the next question. The hard question. “Is he going to be charged with anything?”

George narrowed his eyes. “I suppose he should be charged. He committed a crime.” Jon’s heart sank. George shrugged. “Thing is, it’s kind of hard to charge a person for something if no one saw them do it. I don’t know about you, but it was too dark and rainy for me to see anything.”

Their gazes met and the message was clear. Pretend it never happened.

Jon could do that. “Thanks.”

“Don’t thank me. I was just helping a friend who broke down on the side of the road.” The window began to roll up, but went back down. “Jon?”

“Yeah?”

“Watch your back. Something tells me things are about to go from bad to worse.”

That’s what worried Jon.

He went back to the car, retrieved the gun from where he stuffed it under the driver’s seat, and tucked it into the waist of his pants. When Ellis made no attempt to get out, he went around and opened the passenger door. “C’mon. It’s freezing out here.” Ellis put one foot after the other on the ground. He stood, but didn’t lift his head.

At this rate, it would be morning before they got inside. Jon pulled Ellis out and hooked an arm around Ellis’s ribs. He didn’t resist being hauled inside.

Jon took Ellis upstairs and into the bathroom.

He’d lost so much weight in the past week. Where had he found the energy to walk, let alone go after Lenny?

Jon put the toilet seat down. “Sit.”

Ellis did.

“I’ll be right back.”

Jon left the gun under the mattress in the bedroom. It still wasn’t a safe place, but he’d wear it when he wasn’t sleeping on it. Maybe that would keep Ellis from taking it again. Jon didn’t think that was going to be a problem. Something told him Ellis was done trying to play vigilante. At least for a while.

When Jon returned, Ellis was huddled under his jacket, shaking like a leaf in the wind. His pale skin had turned paper white and his fingernails and lips were blue. Mud painted the side of his neck and filled the creases of his clothes.

Jon turned on the shower. He didn’t want it too hot. As cold as they were, it was already going to feel like being sand blasted.

He knelt in front of Ellis, unzipped his jacket, and moved to pull it off. Ellis jerked away, with enough force he almost toppled off the toilet.

“We need to get these clothes off of you. You’re freezing.” Jon pulled at the jacket, but Ellis held on. “Let go.”

Ellis almost lifted his gaze. His grip loosened and Jon pulled off the jacket.

“I can undress myself.” Ellis’s voice was nothing but scratchy whisper.

“Okay, then do it.” Jon stood. By the time he was undressed, Ellis had barely unbuttoned his shirt. Jon went back to undressing him.

“I’m not a child.”

“No, you’re not. But you can barely hold your hands still. Just let me do this. The quicker it’s done the quicker we can both get warm.” He stripped Ellis down. It didn’t seem possible, but the skin under Ellis’s clothes was even whiter, making him look carved out of chalk. He took Ellis by the arm, but Ellis jerked away again. Jon held up his hands. “Okay, okay. Get in on your own.”

Jon followed him in and shut the door.

When he reached for Ellis he cringed against the wall.

“What is your problem?” Jon said.

Ellis stayed quiet.

“I wish you would quit shutting me out. I’m trying to help you.”

Ellis gave him his back. Jon cursed. This had to end. Either good or bad it had to stop. He grabbed Ellis by the arm and spun him around. He went off balance.

Ellis threw a punch and Jon pinned his arms.

“Calm down.”

He twisted in Jon’s grip

“Ellis, damn it.”

A half scream half hiss gurgled out of Ellis’s throat. He kicked and Jon braced himself against the wall to keep from falling.

“Stop it.”

Ellis didn’t.

“Goddamn it, Ellis, stop.”

All at once he went limp in Jon’s arms.

“Please talk to me.” Jon spoke the words against Ellis’s temple. “I know you hurt. I know you’re angry. I know you feel helpless. I know I can’t fix any of those things, but you need to believe me when I tell you, you’re not alone.”

Even under the spray of warm water his skin was like ice.

“I’m sorry. I’m so sorry I can’t make things better for you.” Jon kissed the side of Ellis’s head.

He said something, but it was lost to the rush of water.

Jon put his ear close to Ellis’s lips. He said, “You’re supposed to hate me.”

“Why would I hate you?”

“I lied to you. I took your gun. I wanted to kill Lenny more than I love you.”

“I can’t hate you.”

“You should.” Ellis rested his head on Jon’s chest.

“I’m hurt by what you did, sure. But I could never hate you.”

Ellis remained quiet while Jon slowly increased the temperature of the water. They stayed until the color returned to Ellis’s skin. When they got out, Jon ushered him into the bedroom and drowned him in the comforter.

Jon was about to get in beside him when Ellis said, “I need to be alone.” He rolled away and disappeared under the blankets.

“I appreciate you doing this. Again.” Jon walked into the dining room, coffee cup in each hand. He sat one down in front of Mike. His gaze hadn’t stopped going over the house since he’d gotten there.

“I told you, I don’t mind.” He took a sip of coffee. “You don’t see houses like this anymore. Any idea what year it was built?”

“No clue.” Jon adjusted the holster on his waist and sat. It had been a long time since he’d carried a gun. It surprised him how normal it felt.

“Hmm.” Mike took another swig. “So, how is Ellis doing?”

“I don’t know. He’s upstairs.” Jon ran his thumb over the handle of his cup. “He doesn’t want to be with me right now.”

Mike nodded.

“I don’t know what to do.”

“I don’t think anyone knows what to do in a situation like this.”

“I thought he was pulling it together. But after this morning?”

Mike put down his cup. “Very dangerous, very stupid, and also very determined.”

“He could have been killed.”

“From what you told me on the phone, he’s lucky he wasn’t.”

Luck wasn’t responsible. “He told me I should hate him.”

A smiled pulled at Mike’s lips.

“You think that’s funny?”

“No.” Mike held up hand. “No, of course not. It’s just familiar.”

“What is that supposed to mean?”

“When’s the last time you talked to Terry?”

Jon looked away. “That isn’t the same.”

“Yes, it is. You don’t talk to her because she won’t hate you. You’re angry at yourself and you feel the need to be punished. Ellis is no different.” Mike traced the wood grain of the table with a finger. “Let him be angry. Encourage him to be angry. An abscess can’t heal until it’s lanced so the infection can be flushed out.”

Jon leaned back in his seat. “I want you to know, that’s a real disgusting analogy.”

“Ah, but a very accurate one.”

How long had Jon’s guilt festered? How long had he fevered with anger and grief? The answer was easy, until Rudy found him in the park and he met Ellis. Until that moment, he’d been alone. Hidden behind a wall he’d built for himself. A wall that was cracked by the offer of a stick of gum.

That day, Jon had been forced back into the world. He didn’t realize how much he missed it until he saw beyond the images of his brother’s death and the incident at the warehouse.