My Despicable Ex (Book 1) (9 page)

“
Ashly,” he said,
interrupting my thoughts of a version of him I liked a lot better,
“our reservation isn’t ready yet. Didn’t you hear me calling your
name?”

My mouth dropped, and it took a minute
for my brain to function. “I was just thinking of how much this
place reminds me of that ski lodge we used to visit with the
gang.”

He grinned. “Yeah. Lots of good
memories there.”

I looked away and bit my lip hard,
wondering if he was thinking the same thing I was. From the wide
smile on his face, I was pretty sure he had the same sexy memory on
his mind.

“
The hotel clerk said we
can relax here, get some breakfast, or sit on the porch that
overlooks the canyon while they work all this out,” Jake
said.

My heart spiked. “I’d love to see the
canyon.” I’d dreamt about seeing the Grand Canyon for my entire
life, and now I was there, at a lodge that overlooked the scenic
landscape.

He touched my back and smiled even
more widely. “This way.”

The natural
splendor of the place was so amazing that I couldn’t possibly stop
snapping photographs. The hotel offered a perfect, panoramic,
mind-blowing view, just 100 yards from the rim. It was absolutely
exhilarating to be able to stare straight down into the
canyon.

“
It’s gorgeous,” Jake said, always one to state the
obvious.

“
I
knew it would be beautiful, but I never expected a view like this,”
I said in awe. It was so magnificent that my heart was pounding a
million miles a minute.

“
And to think, this is just the beginning of the wonders we’re
going to see together on this little field trip your mother planned
for us,” Jake said.

I met his gaze
and shot him a half-smile, then went back to taking pictures. A few
minutes passed, and I moved to sit down in a rocking chair on the
porch.

Jake walked
over and handed me a tall, frosty glass of lemonade.

“
Thanks,” I said.

He took a long
sip, then smiled.

“
What?” I asked curiously.

“
Remember that lemonade stand we made for the fair at school?”
he asked.

I couldn’t
help but laugh at the memory. “Tenth grade, right?”

“
Yeah. I’ll never forget it. It was our first project
together.”

I cringed. “We
didn’t sell much. Of course, I guess it didn’t help that I used
salt instead of sugar.”

“
Don’t forget about those seeds I got in there by
accident.”

“
I’ll never forget the look on Mrs. Smith’s face,” I said.
“That had to be pure torture.”

“
I
know. I can’t believe she pretended to like it.”

“
The principal wasn’t so nice. She shut us down,
remember?”

I sipped my
cold drink, then laughed some more. “Yeah, we definitely made the
worst lemonade ever.”

He gazed into
my eyes. “See?”

“
What?”

“
We
can
have fun and laugh as
friends.”

The pain still
cut deep, in spite of my momentary forgetfulness. “I’m trying,
Jake, because we have to travel together for the time being, but I
don’t know if I can promise you friendship.”

“
That’s okay. We’ll work on it.”

“
I
do want to apologize for being so cold to you on the
plane.”

“
Meh, it’s understandable.”

“
I’ll be cordial, but just don’t expect me to be your chum on
this vacation, okay?”

His eyes
softened. “Are you ever gonna find it in your heart to forgive me,
Ashly?”

“
I-I just don’t know. Maybe if we give it more
time.”

“
I’ve got all the time in the world.” He glanced around. “This
place is nice—a little history, luxury, and scenic nature all
rolled into one.”

“
It’s spectacular,” I said.

“
I
love to enjoy the outdoors. Maybe we could walk the rim trail
together.”

I yawned. “I
don’t know. I’m really tired.”

“
Perhaps tomorrow.”

“
Please don’t get your hopes up. Maybe it’d be better if we
wait till we can hitch a ride on the donkeys.”

“
Yeah,” he said, almost sadly. “I think I’ll go check to see
if our room is ready,” he said, then walked off.

Our
room was more beautiful than I’d imagined a hotel room could be.
T
he Mary Coulter suite was one of a few
rooms in the El Tovar with its own large balcony, almost like a
deck, directly overlooking the canyon. While Jake explored, I opted
to take a long nap, as I was still exhausted from the plane ride
and a bit of jetlag.

When I woke up a while later, Jake
asked me to accompany him to dinner. Dining with him wasn’t
really on my to-do list, so I declined, leaving him to settle for
room service or a dinner alone. I ate a nice dinner alone in the
hotel restaurant.

Jake was out on the balcony, and I
opened my laptop to see if any new orders had come in. In spite of
her warning that all work and no play would make me a dull girl,
there were certain things Nadia had trouble handling on her own;
she had emailed me to let me know we hadn’t received our fabric for
a stunning summer dress. If the fabric didn’t show up by the
following week, we wouldn’t be able to add the dress to the Summer
Sunlight Collection. It was too late to call the company, so I’d
have to wait until morning.

“
Ashly?” Jake called from
the balcony. “You’ve just gotta see it out here. It’s
gorgeous.”

“
Um…I’m kind of in the
middle of something right now.”

“
Just one quick peek?” he
begged.

I set my purse down and headed
outside. Immediately, the moonlit canyon and glittering stars took
my breath away.

“
Here, have a seat,” Jake
said, motioning to a chair beside him.

“
I’d rather stand. It’s
amazing,” I said, “absolutely breathtaking.”

He turned to meet my gaze, and I
quickly looked away. “You’re mad at me.”

“
Yes, but it’s not just
that. On top of the fact that it’s a little hard to be around you
so much, we’re having problems with a shipment back at the
boutique.”

“
I’m sorry,” he said. “Like
I’ve told you time and time again, walking out on you was the worst
mistake I ever made. I lost the only good thing in my life, and
I’ve regretted it every single day since. I swear, Ashly, not a day
has gone by when I haven’t thought about you.”

“
It was the most painful
and difficult thing I’ve ever been through.”

“
I
know, Ashly. I also carry the scars.”

“
Really? You poor thing,” I said, scowling at him. “Any scars
you have from that day are self-inflicted, Jake, in case you’ve
forgotten.”

When I looked
away, he pushed a stray strand of hair behind my ear. “I’m so, so
sorry for what I did to you, to us.”

“
Did you break up with me because the romance was gone or the
sparks weren’t there?”

“
Are you kidding? We had huge chemistry.”

“
Then was there somebody else?”

“
No.”

“
Did you want someone prettier? Was I horrible in bed?” I
asked. “I’m sorry, Jake, but I just have to know. These questions
have been bouncing around in my head for years.”

“
Ashly, you are still the most beautiful woman I’ve ever laid
eyes on, and our sex life was…well, amazing. We shared a connection
I’ve never felt with anyone, and we were so in love. I just
panicked. I-I just wasn’t ready for marriage back then
and—”

“
Why did you come back to New York City, Jake? Was it just
about the money, or were you trying to stalk me?”

A breeze swept
through his dark, messy hair. “I can’t imagine living without
you.”

“
Nadia said you were at my mother’s funeral. Why didn’t you
say anything to me?”

“
Ashly, I didn’t want to make your day worse. Look at the way
you reacted when you saw me in your lawyer’s office. I didn’t want
to cause a scene like that at your mother’s funeral.”

“
No, I suppose not.”

“
I’m so sorry for the loss of your mother.”

“
She was my best friend,” I whispered, my voice quivering. “If
you don’t mind, I don’t want to talk about her death. I can’t
handle it.”

“
I
know how hard it is.”

We didn’t say
much after that, and I enjoyed the silence as I stared at the sky.
A while later, Jake went back inside and brought out a couple sodas
for us, a sweet gesture; he’d stocked our mini-fridge with Pepsi
from the vending machine.

I paused when
he softly pointed upward.

“
Look! It’s a shooting star.”

I watched as
the bright beam traveled across the dark sky.

“
It’s gotta be a sign,” he said.

“
A
sign?”

“
Maybe fate threw us together again so we could become friends
and work out our differences.”

My jaw set
into a stern grimace. “It’s science, Jake—just a shooting star and
nothing more.”

“
Wow. You used to be such a romantic.”

I sucked in a deep gulp of
air.
“A lot about
me died that day, Jake.”

He sighed.
“One way or another, I’m gonna melt that ice covering your
heart.”

I peered at him
intently.
“Instead
of melting ice, how about answering another question?”

“
Anything.”

“
Where have you been all these years?” I asked.

“
I
got a job as a firefighter in Texas.”

“
Yeah, Nadia told me that much,” I said. “She said you were
transferred back home. That’s what you’ve always wanted to do,
right? You went out there and followed your dream. I’m really happy
for you for that, even if you had to ditch me to do it.”

“
I’ve been working hard out there, but I missed everyone
horribly—especially you.”

“
This isn’t some cheesy romance novel with Fabio on the cover,
Jake. You can’t just walk into my life and think I’m gonna run back
into your arms like nothing ever happened. How dare
you?”

“
The past is the past. Why can’t we concentrate on the
present? Didn’t we both agree to come on this trip as
friends?”

“
The only thing I agreed to was to be cordial, and I’m doing
the best I can with that, Jake.

“
I
realized the fatal mistake on our wedding night, but it was too
late by then. The damage had already been done. I knew you’d never
forgive me after I didn’t show up at that wedding.”

“
I
might have, if you’d just have come to me that night. Sure, I was
mad, but I wasn’t ready to lose you. If you had come to me and told
me you wanted to wait, I would have been happy to do that for you,
but you didn’t even include me in your decision. You just took off
and disappeared for months, for years.”

“
You’re rich, Ashly. If you had really wanted to find me, you
could’ve easily hired a private detective.”

“
Yeah, I guess I could have, but I’m not a stalker.” I ran a
hand through my hair in thought. “I wished our breakup had been
different so we could’ve remained friends, because losing you…well,
you were my best friend, my soulmate, my intimate partner, and the
closest person to me. We talked about our future so much,
even
what we would name our kids, where
we’d live, and what our life together would be like. Jake, I was
sure you were the one I’d spend the rest of my life with, but you
destroyed our fairytale romance.
I was all fastened into my wedding gown, happier than
I’d ever been in my life, and then you were just gone. It felt like
you just died, like you’d been ripped right out of my life. It was
like losing a limb, and it hurt like a bitch. After that, every day
was a struggle, and the pain just wouldn’t go away.”

“
I’m hurting just as bad. The scene and our last phone call
just plays over and over again in my mind. I’ve been haunted by it,
and I’ve regretted it every day of my life.”

“
Then why didn’t you pick up the damn phone, email me, or
Facebook me? Hell, you could’ve texted me.”

“
My
head and heart fought about that for a long time, but the truth is,
I couldn’t bear to face you again. I was so ashamed. Losing you was
the worst heartbreak ever, and I knew I had brought it upon
myself.”

“
I
think we’re both dysfunctional right now, and I can’t really deal
with it yet. Let’s just stay focused on what we came here for and
cash in on this inheritance.”

He nodded and
touched my hand. “I made a bed on the couch.”

“
Good. We’d better get some sleep, because we’ve got a long
day ahead of us. It takes about five hours to get down to the
bottom of the canyon by mule.”