My Favorite Senior Moments (10 page)

Today's Thoughts

With long life I [the L
ORD
] will satisfy him and show him my salvation.

P
SALM
91:16

How blessed I am, dear Lord, that even if no one on earth looks out for me you always do. I praise your holy name!

49

Sweet Potatoes

Cynthia walked into
the Save-A-Lot Grocery Mart and was pleased to see sweet potatoes on sale at a good price. She knew they'd keep well through the winter, so she bought a whole bag. She took them home and stored them in a cool bedroom, along with some apples and oranges she'd purchased.

She served the fruit in various recipes during the Christmas holidays, and planned to use the sweet potatoes for Christmas dinner. But because her daughter brought a sweet potato dish to that meal, Cynthia put her sweet potatoes on hold, knowing they'd be fine for another few weeks.

Following the holidays, Cynthia moved some of her furniture around, swapping certain pieces from one room to another. Months went by and Cynthia decided one night to bake a sweet potato as part of her supper. She looked for the bag of potatoes in the bedroom where she was sure she'd put them. They were nowhere in sight. Then she remembered she'd moved things around, so maybe they were hiding somewhere. She let out a sigh and set out on a mission to find the missing potatoes. Perhaps they were in another room now, but which one? The garage or even the storage unit were possibilities. Cynthia phoned her daughter to see if she'd seen them when she was visiting over the Christmas weekend.

Madeline said no, but she was amused at the situation and wished her mom luck in locating them. Her daughter assured Cynthia that by this time the “fragrance” of the potatoes should lead her to them.

Cynthia continued her search for another few days without success. “I said a prayer, asking the Lord to help me find the misplaced sweet potatoes,” Cynthia admitted. Months passed and at Easter the following year, Cynthia's son and his wife were coming for dinner. Her daughter-in-law called ahead to ask if she could make sweet potatoes to go with the ham Cynthia planned to serve. Then she told her mother-in-law that a bag of sweet potatoes had mysteriously popped up at their house. She and her husband were sure they'd never bought them.

Cynthia burst out laughing. “Apparently my son grabbed the bag of sweet potatoes along with my Christmas gifts to his family when they left for home! And then they got misplaced at their house too. Mystery solved! Thank you, God.”

Today's Thoughts

Put your hope in God.

P
SALM
42:11

This story makes me smile, Lord. I've done so many silly things too, including misplacing a pair of earrings, a summer hat, and a bag of cherries I was sure I'd brought home from the grocery store. But when I put my hope in you, dear God, you get right to it and solve my problem. Thank you for taking such good care of me.

50

Trying to Be Helpful

Zach and Ellen
plopped down on the two remaining seats near the boarding gate for their flight to New Zealand. They were bushed! They'd been up half the night packing and making sure they had all the documents and currency they needed. Boarding passes, passports, driver's licenses, itinerary, traveler's checks, and some cash. Then there were medications, vitamins, sleep aids, socks in case their feet got cold, extra jackets for cool evenings, and some playing cards and snacks for the long flight.

Finally, they'd fallen asleep at midnight and were startled when the alarm clock sounded at 4:30
AM
—giving them a few moments to eat a bite, splash a bit of water on their faces, and pack up the remaining items before calling a taxi for the airport.

Finally they had time to take a breath and rest before the boarding call. “I could use a cup of strong coffee about now,” Ellen muttered.

Zach turned up his hearing aid. His wife never drank coffee, so why would she start now? He decided he must have heard her incorrectly. He wanted to help, so he stood up and wandered down the aisle of vendors.

He stopped in a candy store and found what he was sure Ellen would love. After paying for it, he headed back to the gate. Before sitting down, he handed his purchase to her. “Here you go, love. Enjoy, but don't eat too many or they might upset your tummy this early in the morning.”

Ellen frowned. “What are you talking about?” She took the box
from her husband's hand, read the description, and burst out laughing. A Cup of Toffee! She opened the package and, sure enough, there was a coffee cup crammed with individual pieces of toffee candy. She looked at her husband and shook her head.

“I asked the clerk, and she said this was as strong as it comes. I hope it'll be all right.”

Ellen plucked a candy from the cup, unwrapped it, and popped it into her mouth. “Perfect,” she said. Then she offered one to her husband.
Life is certainly a new adventure after your mate starts wearing hearing aids,
she decided.

Today's Thoughts

A gentle answer turns away wrath.

P
ROVERBS
15:1

Thank you, Lord, for reminding me to be gracious and patient when things turn out differently than I'd hoped, or planned, or asked for.

51

With and Without

Jackie and Kel,
now in their sixties, decided to run a half marathon—21 kilometers (21k). It seemed like a good idea at the time, but when it came down to training, well that was another matter. It was much more fun to talk about than to do it, even though both had been following exercise regimes most of their adult lives. Still—competitive running had not been part of their routine.

At their ages, tight thighs, smooth calves, beautiful biceps, and slim waists were things of the past. Or were they? Maybe, just maybe, they could recapture some of their enviable physical traits—if they got serious about what they had to do to compete. The two friends headed for the gym.

Jackie pumped iron while Kel jogged on the treadmill. Then they challenged themselves to four times up and down the steep staircase. By the time they finished, they were ready for naps or pieces of pie or both! Instead, they took hot showers, dressed for the day, and walked toward the front door.

Kel looked at Jackie. “How about we celebrate our decision to run the 10k with a cup of soup at Dena's Deli?”

Jackie laughed and nodded, but added, “Without the bread and butter.”

“And with a slice of pie for dessert,” Jackie said.

“But without the ice cream,” Kel said, agreeing to the plan.

“And with a cup of tea,” Jackie added.

“But without a lump of sugar.”

Jackie's face drooped. “Sounds dreadful!”

“I agree,” said Kel. “Easy fix. Let's drop the withouts and you're on.”

The pair locked arms and skipped out to the parking lot with a lot of enthusiasm but without discipline.

Today's Thoughts

No discipline seems pleasant at the time, but painful. Later on, however, it produces a harvest of righteousness and peace for those who have been trained by it.

H
EBREWS
12:11

Lord, I see myself in this story. I have good intentions, but I don't always follow through. Help me keep my word to you, to others, and to myself.

52

Not So Bad After All

Patsy woke up
with a hot, sore, swollen throat. She staggered into the bathroom and opened the medicine cabinet.
Where are those lozenges?
she questioned, knowing she'd bought a fresh package not long ago in case she caught a cold or the flu. They were her favorite flavor––orange––and had just the right amount of sweetening to make them bearable when her throat was as sore as it felt today.

She poured herself a glass of warm water and padded down the hall to the kitchen. She'd just have to make due gargling with saltwater. That was her dad's remedy every time she complained of a sore throat when she was a kid. Patsy shook her head at just the thought of salty water touching the blazing flesh in her throat. But if it worked for her father, she figured it would work for her too.

Patsy reached into the pantry and pulled out a bag filled with crystals. She poured a half teaspoonful into her glass and stirred. Then she took a deep breath, closed her eyes, and took in a mouthful to swish at the back of her throat. Even before she tasted it, she thought,
Ugh!
Then she had a surprising revelation! The concoction didn't taste as bad as she'd expected. It didn't burn at all. In fact, it felt cool on her delicate throat. She opened her eyes and decided to repeat the process. When she reached for the bag on the counter, she realized she'd taken out a container of sugar! No wonder it didn't burn. Patsy chuckled and decided this particular senior moment was actually a good one.

Today's Thoughts

Heal me, L
ORD
, and I will be healed; save me and I will be saved, for you are the one I praise.

J
EREMIAH
17:14

Lord, I do the silliest things sometimes. As I get older, I'm finding I'm less apt to get mad at myself because I know you will set me straight. I'm glad you're with me night and day and will warn me if I start to do something dangerous. Thank you for that.

Foodies

53

Under a Tack!

Eighty-two-year-old Maura and
her daughter Penny walked into their favorite restaurant. Maura could hardly wait to order her regular meal—Mexican Chicken Salad. The waiter greeted them warmly and started them off with ice water, tortilla chips, and salsa. The women chatted and laughed as they exchanged news before the server came and took their salad orders. They hadn't been together for a couple of months, so there was much to talk about.

Penny filled in details about her high-school-aged children, and Maura brought her daughter up to speed about all that was going on at Hillside Senior Living.

The salads arrived and Maura dug in eagerly, munching away on the corn strips and lettuce. A moment later she gasped and put her fingers into her mouth.

Penny immediately reached across the table and touched her arm. “Mom, what is it? You're as white as snow.”

Maura pulled out a bright yellow tack and held it up for her daughter to see.

Just then the waiter came by to check on them.

“How did this get into my salad?” Maura asked.

“Oh my goodness!” the waiter said between gasps. “That tack was in your salad? It must have fallen off the bulletin board in the back.” With that he turned and raced back to the kitchen. A moment later the restaurant manager arrived at the table, gushing an apology.

“Madam, I am so sorry. Let me make it up to you.” With that he
handed Maura a gift card for a free meal the next time she visited the restaurant.

Not really hurt, Maura enjoyed the attention. Now she likes sharing her story, telling how she was “under a tack” that day at the restaurant. She recommends everyone order “a salad with tacks” because it comes with a free lunch.

Today's Thoughts

Do not withhold good from those to whom it is due, when it is in your power to act.

P
ROVERBS
3:27

Lord, this incident was amusing—but also kind of scary. I'm grateful you kept Maura safe. Thank you for watching over me too.

54

Awful Waffles

Henry loved waffles
for breakfast more than oatmeal, scrambled eggs, or Cheerios. His wife, Edna, tried to interest him in something different—just to mix things up a bit, but he'd always say, “No, thanks. Waffles it is.” When she set the plate of fluffy cakes in front of him, he got right to it. First, he slathered each one with butter and then filled each little square with just the right drops of pure maple syrup. After that step he dusted each one with powdered sugar that he'd carefully sifted prior to sitting down at the table.

This ritual became very annoying to Edna. Just once in their 40 years of marriage she'd have enjoyed doing something different—like going out to breakfast or trying a daring new recipe. But Henry didn't budge. So one day Edna took matters into her own hands.

Henry came down to breakfast on a Monday morning and asked his usual question: “What's on the griddle? Those awesome waffles of yours?” Then he slapped his knee and laughed as though they'd never had this exchange before.

Edna murmured, “I'm not so sure about awesome. I'd say
awful
.” Then she relented and made the waffles her husband loved so much. She handed them to him already bathed in butter, maple syrup, and powdered sugar. Only something happened that particular morning that changed everything. By mistake, Edna had grabbed and used a bottle of soy sauce instead of pure maple syrup!

Henry took one bite and exclaimed, “All right, Edna. You win! These waffles are awful.”