My Favorite Senior Moments (14 page)
Read My Favorite Senior Moments Online
Authors: Karen O'Connor
“But think how rude it'll be if I can't remember his name. And it will be your fault for not helping me think of it.”
“All right, but keep your voice down and eyes straight ahead. I'll start with the âA' names, and you take it from there. Let me know when I hit the right one. “Andrew. Alan. Ace. Anson. Aaron⦠”
Margaret kept going, but John kept shaking his head all the way to the letter “H.”
“I'm done,” she murmured. “This is ridiculous. Just admit you forgot his name. After all you're getting olderâand so is he. He'll understand.”
“No! Look, Margaret, this has always worked before. Put our two âhalf' wits together, and we'll be a complete wit! I mean⦠well, you know what I mean. We need each other.”
Margaret put her hands together and tightened her lips. She let out a long breath and turned to her husband. “Enough is enough!” she whispered loudly.
The woman in front of them turned around and frowned. “Cut it out, you two. Have a little respect. The president is speaking, and I'm hard of hearing.”
The president of the association finished his remarks and adjourned the meeting. John grabbed Margaret by her sleeve and pulled her toward the door. “Let's get out of here!”
“We can't. Look, here comes whatshisname. You have to face the music.”
“Hi, there,” the man said. “So good to see the two of you. It's been a while. Have you been traveling?”
“No, we've been around. You know, here and there with kids and grandkids and stuff.” John's palms were suddenly wet.
The man put a hand on John's shoulder. “I'm really embarrassed to say this, but your name escapes me. Please forgive an old man.”
“No problem,” said John. “Happens to me sometimes too, doesn't it, Margaret?”
Margaret rolled her eyes.
“John. My name's John,” he said.
“Now that's one for the books. Here we have the same name, and I can't even keep that in my mind. I hope you're doing better for your age than I am for mine!”
Margaret raised an eyebrow but didn't say a word.
Today's Thoughts
Those who know your name trust in you, for you, L
ORD
, have never forsaken those who seek you.
P
SALM
9:10
As long as I remember your name and call upon it, I'll be okay, Lord. And, of course, you never forget my name. Thank you!
“Want to watch
a movie?” Martin asked his wife.
“Sure. What do you have in mind?” Pam replied.
“I don't know. Something we can get into.”
“Like one about WWII, right?” Pam asked.
Martin noticed her frown. “What's wrong with that?”
“We won the war, dear! Move on.”
“I suppose you want to watch a âchick flick' where the guy and gal are all lovey-dovey.”
“What's wrong with that?”
“They're all the same. Girl flirts and connives until she gets the guy, loses the guy when he gets scared, and then gets him. End of story.”
“That sounds pretty sarcastic. I seem to remember the plot differently. It's boy meets girl. Boy loses girl because he doesn't treat her right. Girl leaves. Boy chases girl. Boy repents and promises to change. Girl believes him. Boy proposes. Boy and girl get married. That's how we got together, isn't it? It's an age-old plot. It's what people like. And it has a happy ending. Viewers like that too.”
“How about a movie about WWII that includes a boy meets girl loses girl gets girl in the end? Then we'll both be satisfied.”
“Okay if you can find one. Good luck. I'm going to knit or read a book. Let me know what you come up with.”
“I wouldn't know where to start. What do you recommend?”
“Ask our knowledgeable friendâthe computer!”
Today's Thoughts
Husbands, love your wives, just as Christ loved the church and gave himself up for her.
E
PHESIANS
5:25
We're differentâfor sureâmen and women, that is. I thank you, God, for showing us how to meet in the middleâat least sometimes.
Jenny gets things
doneâon time or even ahead of time, and the work is always in tip-top shape. If someone needs something accomplished, she's the man⦠er⦠woman! She admits to being a “Type A” personality and a multitasker. She can juggle many plates at once and keep them going without a crash. That is, untilâ¦
One night as Jenny hurried home from a meeting, she was concentrating on the long night of deskwork she'd planned. She felt especially rushed and stressed. “I noticed the mail had arrived, so I jumped out of my car, gathered my purse and books, and pointed my car's remote keyless entry (RKE) at the car door. With a click, the door locked.”
She made a quick dash to the mailbox at the curb and pointed her RKE once again. Nothing happened. She tried again as her impatience grew. “This is no time to act up!” she groused at the object in her hand. “I have work to do!”
She pressed the gizmo once more but still no change. How could she get to her mail? She was expecting a check from a client and needed to put the money into her checking account the following morning. One more try. Click! Click! Nothing.
Suddenly Jenny realized what she was doingâusing her car remote for her mailbox. How silly was that? She glanced around to see if any neighbors were watching.
Just then a jogger ran by. “That's not going to work!” he yelled.
Jenny's face grew hot. She lowered her eyes, grabbed the correct
key, opened the box, and reached for her mail. She closed the box and scurried into the house. But that wasn't the end of it. Days later she tried the same thing at the main post office when she stopped to pick up her ministry's mail. She returned to the car and explained to her husband what she'd done.
He came up with a possible solution. “You need a remote clicker to turn on your brain!”
Today's Thoughts
In all your ways submit to him, and he will make your paths straight.
P
ROVERBS
3:6
Whew! I have so many close calls and embarrassing senior moments. Thank you for loving me and making sure everything turns outs okay.
Lucy's neighbor Manuel
was a WWII veteran. He loved to tell war stories to anyone who'd listen. Lucy had been his audience of one on more than one occasion over the years.
Manuel took it on himself to see that his grandson Jake studied the piano. The grandfather paid Lucy to teach the boy. Every Wednesday Manuel and Jake came by, week after week. The boy improved and seemed to enjoy playing. Manuel was proud as punch, as he often admitted, that his grandson was taking up where he'd left off when he was a kid. “Not enough money for me to take lessons,” he lamented one day, “so I want to be sure Jake has the chance I never had.”
Lucy had a soft spot for the old man. His stories were a bit tiresome since she'd heard them all, but he had such a big heart she couldn't help but love and admire him for what he was doing for Jake.
At the end of each lesson, Manuel would knock on Lucy's door, ready to pick up Jake. Routinely he thanked her for what she was doing and gave her a big hug. Pretty soon Jake was doing the same.
One day Lucy teared up as Manuel wrapped his strong arms around her. “You're about the only one who hugs me these days,” she blurted out.
Manuel stepped back and a puzzled look crossed his face. “I don't know why,” he said as he patted Lucy's shoulder. “You don't smell bad.”
Today's Thoughts
The L
ORD
makes firm the steps of the one who delights in him.
P
SALM
37:23
Lord, you are a great Godâbringing a smile to my face just when I need it.
Paul looked at
Lulu, his sweet wife of 42 years, lying in the bed they'd shared all these years. She was pretty sick. Her face was pale and her hands looked frail. He loved her with everything in him, and he didn't want her to die. But he also knew that her time on earth was in God's hands so he needed to trust in the divine plan and not his own desire.
Pulling out his Bible, Paul began reading from Matthew's Gospel, chapter 18: “Truly I tell you, unless you change and become like little children, you will never enter the kingdom of heaven. Therefore, whoever takes the lowly position of this child is the greatest in the kingdom of heaven. And whoever welcomes one such child in my name welcomes me.”
Paul started thinking about how people often referred to life in the older yearsâspecifically the seventies and eightiesâas a second childhood. That can feel like a cruel comment when a person is at that stage. But then Paul smiled, squeezed Lulu's small hand, and kissed her on the forehead. She did look like a little child in the middle of a big bed, so innocent and trusting. She couldn't do anything for herself anymore. It was up to God and him to do for Lulu what she could no longer do for herself.
Paul's eyes were suddenly wet with tears. He sank down on his knees beside his wife and wept. Then words so soft and quiet he almost missed them crossed his mind. It was as though they came
straight from heaven⦠and maybe they did. “I love that little child.” Paul relaxed his shoulders. He knew things were going to be all right.
Today's Thoughts
There is no fear in love. But perfect love drives out fear.
1 J
OHN
4:18
Lord, teach me to love and not give in to fear. Where love is, there you are.
Rodney appeared at
Oakhurst Memorial Hospital eager to start the volunteer work he'd signed up for with the Patient Relations Department. The work was easy enough. Just make the rounds, chat for a moment with the patients, and ask if they needed anythingâa book or magazine, a prayer, a visit, a glass of water, help with the television or radio, or anything else.
He enjoyed people, wanted to be helpful where needed, and was glad to be of use now that he was retired from his teaching job of 40-plus years at the local high school. Rodney had experienced excellent health most of his life, so he felt compelled to serve those who were less fortunate. It took so little to bring a bit of joy to people who were suffering from cancer, or recovering from surgery, or being rehabilitated after an accident.
“Most of our patients respond well to the little thingsââa warm smile, a kind word, a funny story,” said the department head, Mona, to the group of volunteers during a training session. “Rely on your intuition. You'll know what to do and what to say when you're there in person. Good luck and report back to me at the end of your stretch. Oh, and please know that you are very much appreciated. Thank you for your service.” She concluded by reminding the volunteers to contact her immediately if they ran into anything out of the ordinary, such as a rude or belligerent patient. Rodney filed that remark away. He doubted he'd run into anyone he couldn't handle with a little humor.
The first few visits were a breeze. An older man asked for a particular magazine and a young boy enjoyed trading knock-knock jokes with Rodney. So far so good. He walked down the hall to the next room on his listââ#415ââand peeked in. “Hello!” he called to the woman in the bed. “I'm Rodney, and I'm here for patient relations. May I come in? And if there is anything I can do to make⦠”
Before he could finish, the woman in the bed bellowed, “How dare you suggest that you're here for patient relations! I'll have you know I'm a married woman. I only have relations with my husband!”
Today's Thoughts
Do not forget to show hospitality to strangers, for by so doing some people have shown hospitality to angels without knowing it.
H
EBREWS
13:2
Even when we have good intentions, sometimes people question our motives. Help me, Lord, to do what is right in every situation. When I'm misunderstood, help me speak the truth in love.
“Look, Mike!” Carrie
pointed out a wooden plaque to her husband as they browsed a gift shop. “Let's buy it and hang it by the front door. The grandkids will get a kick out of it.”
Mike picked up the wooden piece: “Grandparents at Play.” He pulled out a 10-dollar bill and plunked it down on the counter by the front door of the shop. “I agree, and it's a fair price.”
The two left the shop and headed home. They were bushed after a day of shopping and eating out. They were ready to crash in front of the television, feet up, popcorn bowl in hand.
