My Favorite Senior Moments (15 page)

But first Carrie had a chore for Mike. “Please hang up the plaque,” she said. “It's a real conversation piece, and I don't want to forget about it.”

Mike hustled to his tool drawer and pulled out a hammer and a couple of nails. In a matter of minutes the plaque was in place by the front door—just where Carrie wanted it.

That evening their daughter Jenny and her two kids, Shawn and Dede, stopped by unexpectedly. “We were in the neighborhood,” Jenny said with a shrug. “I hope we're not interrupting anything. Just wanted to stop by and say hello.”

Ten-year-old Shawn spoke up. “I like that plaque by the front door. It's new, right?”

“Yep. Bought it today,” Mike said.

“What do you think?” asked Carrie.

Shawn frowned. “I'm not sure it fits you guys.”

“What do you mean?” his mom asked.

“It says ‘Grandparents at Play.' But Grandma and Grandpa are just watching TV.”

“At our age, that's what we call ‘play'!” Mike said.

Today's Thoughts

Their little ones dance about.

J
OB
21:11

Grandchildren certainly know how to bring us down to reality. I'm grateful for their honesty, hugs, and humor. Thank you, God, for my grands.

78

Hey, Sugar!

Roland liked two
teaspoons of sugar in each cup of coffee, and he drank several cups a day—to his wife's dismay. Jane didn't like seeing him piling on the sweets at his age, but she couldn't do much about it.

While on vacation in England she hoped he'd switch to the preferred beverage there—black tea with a bit of milk and skip the sugar. But Roland wasn't easily persuaded. If there was a choice between coffee and tea, coffee won every time.

One morning after a restless night, Roland was eager to get to the dining room for his first cup of coffee. He turned to Jane. “I need a jolt to keep me awake during the tour today.”

Jane rolled her eyes but zipped her lips. No use starting a quarrel first thing in the morning. She was intent on enjoying their vacation. When they arrived in the dining room, she focused on their table companions and made small talk about the agenda for the day. “I'm so excited about seeing Buckingham Palace!” she exclaimed. “I'm going to get a photo of Roland and me standing at the front gate. And I want a shot of those cute guards with their red trousers and tall, fluffy, black hats.” She chuckled waiting for an acknowledgment from the couple sitting across from her.

At that moment, Roland looked around and blurted, “Where's the sugar? Looks like the waiter forgot to deliver it to our table.”

“No, dear,” said Jane. “It's over there.” She pointed to the far corner of the long table. She stood up to reach for the bowl.

“Hey, sugar!” Roland said in a louder voice than usual, apparently happy to see the treat he needed to sweeten his coffee.

Just then the waitress rounded the corner next to where Roland was sitting. She stopped in her tracks and glared at him. “My name is Sara. I'll be happy to help you, sir, but please call me by my name. I'm not your sugar—or anyone else's for that matter.”

Today's Thoughts

I will instruct you and teach you in the way you should go.

P
SALM
32:8

Whoa! People do get themselves into a muddle sometimes without knowing it. I'm so thankful that even when my words fly out of my mouth and land where I had no intention of sending them, you rescue me through your grace and wisdom.

79

It's a Wrap

Jeanette bought tickets
to an open-air concert in Los Angeles. She rarely went out at night, but she couldn't resist this opportunity to hear one of her favorite bands. She was excited to be attending with her neighbor Rob. Both she and Rob had lost their spouses a month apart, so they found comfort in talking with each other and enjoying an outing together from time to time. Rob had treated Jeanette to a lovely dinner the week before, so she felt it was her turn to treat him. And since they both liked the same kind of music, this particular concert was well worth the money she'd spent.

Now for her choice of clothing. Jeanette browsed through her closet, eager to find just the right item—one that was nice but also warm since the cool night air would blow in just after sunset. A sweater? Maybe. A coat or jacket? Too heavy. She wanted something attractive, easy to put on and take off—a light wrap would do. But she didn't own anything like that.

Then she remembered her neighbor Sue, who lived on the other side of Rob's house, would likely have just what she needed. Sue was a fashion plate at age 72. “I don't think she'd mind loaning me a wrap for a few hours,” Jeanette decided. She dashed off a text, knowing tech-savvy Sue kept her phone by her side night and day.

Within seconds Sue appeared at Jeanette's door with a package in hand. “Got your text,” she said with a smile. “Here you go. It'll be the perfect snack before you leave for the concert.”

“Snack?” Jeanette was puzzled.

“You asked for a wrap, right?” Now Sue appeared perplexed.

“Well, yes. You know—the kind you put around your shoulders to ward off the chill.”

Sue burst out laughing. “Oh my! I thought you meant a wrap—you know, the kind you eat. I keep a supply in my freezer for quick meals. But I can get you a light-wool wrap, sure. I have those too!”

Jeanette joined her laughter. “I'll take both,” she said. “And thanks for being such a well-prepared neighbor.”

Today's Thoughts

It is more blessed to give than to receive.

A
CTS
20:35

What a cute story, Lord. Sometimes even when I want to be helpful and neighborly I get my signals crossed. Thank you for helping me navigate miscommunications with grace and mercy.

80

Facebook Fuss

Eleanor bragged that
she didn't own a cell phone, or a computer, or an iPad, or any other tech device—and she never would, so there! One afternoon her grandson Conner tried to talk her into getting a simple email machine so she could stay in touch with her grandchildren.

“Grams, it is so easy to use and it's fun. Much easier than writing letters, especially now that you have arthritis.” He worked hard at persuading her, but she wouldn't have any part of it. She stuck her nose in the book she was reading and sank down in the easy chair in front of the fireplace.

“Okay, have it your way. But I'd sure love to tell my friends that my hip grandmother knows how to text and use email and connect with me on Facebook.”

“What's all this fuss about Facebook anyway?” she asked. “Why would anyone have to sign up for a way to talk to people when the phone has worked quite well for nearly a century? And what a goofy name.
Faaaaceboooook
.” She mocked the word by drawing out each syllable. Then she held up the book she was reading. “See? I already know how to ‘face book.' I face my book every time I pick it up to read!”

“Okay, Grams, you win.” Conner blew out a long breath and returned to his laptop.
No winning with some of these older folks. And they tell us how hardheaded we teens are!

Today's Thoughts

The tongue of the wise adorns knowledge, but the mouth of the fool gushes folly.

P
ROVERBS
15:2

Lord, may I never become so stubborn and unyielding that I refuse to learn something new that would benefit me and those I love.

81

What a Crab!

Curt and Mame
were invited to join some friends for Crab Fest at Fisherman's Wharf in San Francisco. Curt was especially excited about the event because he loved seafood. His wife? Not so much. She preferred food that grew on land. Still, she agreed to go. The event celebrated crab season by bringing together chefs from some of the best Fisherman's Wharf restaurants. They'd share bites of their favorite crab dishes and serve local beverages. Recipe ideas and a free commemorative cup would top off the evening nicely.

The couples strolled the wharf and browsed the gift shops before indulging in the delicious spread on the huge table under a canopy overlooking the ocean. Curt socialized with old friends and made some new ones. They talked shop and enjoyed bantering about golf, fishing, and the latest sports updates. Meanwhile, Mame found an open bench and seated herself there with a plate of salad. She'd never really liked seafood, so she was reluctant to try it again. But maybe she should, she decided, after watching people return to the table again and again and hearing remarks about how yummy the food was.

Mame got up and made her way to an empty spot in front of the array of crabmeat dishes and placed a few sample items on her plate. She returned to the bench and took a bite of two special recipes. Hmmm. Some of the concoctions, as she referred to the various blends, were actually very tasty. She went back for second and third helpings of her favorites.

Eventually Curt caught up with her. “I thought I'd lost you,” he said with a scowl. “Where did you disappear to?”

“I didn't disappear,” she said. “I was right here all along, hanging out with a bunch of crabs. And they are very nice—and tasty too,” she said and winked.

Today's Thoughts

Everything that lives and moves about will be food for you. Just as I gave you the green plants, I now give you everything.

G
ENESIS
9:3

Thank you, God, for providing what I need to keep physically fit. But even more important, you gave me the Bread of Life—Jesus Christ.

82

Questionable Company

Lloyd joined his
new wife, Emma Jean, on her annual autumn visit to her son and his family in Alabama. It was his first time in the Deep South, and everything about it—from the food to the way people talked—fascinated him. He ate grits, collard and mustard greens, hushpuppies, pecan pie, finger-lickin' fried chicken, country ham, fried green tomatoes, and biscuits and gravy.

When the family ate out, Lloyd, a city man, let his wife order for him. He just couldn't make heads or tails out of the way folks spoke. They cut short some words and dragged out others. Trying to understand through their accent was driving him nuts.

After the visit was over, he finally felt the freedom to tell Emma Jean his thoughts about the trip.

“What did you think of my family?” she asked.

“Nice folks,” he said.

“And the food?”

“Surprisingly delicious.”

“And Alabamans in general?”

“Hospitable and friendly,” he remarked. “But there is one thing I couldn't get the hang of.”

“What's that?”

“So many derelicts to contend with.”

Emma Jean scrunched her face in irritation. “What on earth are you talking about? Why, you'll not find on the face of the earth a
nicer bunch of folks than Alabamans! I'm hurt by such a blunt evaluation of the people I love.”

Lloyd scratched his temple. “Hold on, will you? I'm not talking about your family. I could understand them pretty well after a day or so. But when we went to the diner and to the grocery store and gas station, well, everyone talked just a little different, and I was racing to keep up with them. Good thing you were with me.”

Emma Jean stopped for a moment and then laughed out loud. “Oh, you mean
dialect
—the way people talk.”

“Isn't that what I said?”

“Darling, a
derelict
is someone without a home or possessions who has abandoned his or her responsibilities. I think you meant
dialect
. That word refers to a particular way of speaking that is specific to a region, such as the East Coast or the Deep South.”

Now it was Lloyd's turn to laugh. “Oops! Sorry. I'd better get my wording straightened out or I may end up a derelict with a dialect in the Deep South.”

Emma Jean nodded. “Sure thang,” she drawled.

Today's Thoughts

[The L
ORD
says,] “Before they call I will answer; while they are still speaking I will hear.”

I
SAIAH
65:24

Lord, I have a lot to learn in every way. Thank you for giving me so many experiences and opportunities.

83

You've Got Mail

Harry sipped the
strong brew in his favorite cup while he was wondering what was taking so long for his computer to warm up. It was old, for sure, but this was crazy. Suddenly the screen came to life, and Harry could finally look at the mountain of email he was sure to have after a long weekend out of town. One in particular caught his attention. It was a response to a request he'd made of the president of the book club to chair the team that would select books to present to the members for reading and discussing the next quarter.