Never say forever (Never series Book 1) (30 page)

I whisper, “Please make it baby. I love you so much. Don’t make me lose you.”

I plead over and over again until the doctors finally kick me out. I stand in the hallway and can’t seem to move my legs. I stand there
watching them roll his bed out of the room as the tears flow a little too easily down my cheeks.

I stand in the hallway that Aiden was taken down and I just stare. I can’t move. I stand there until a nurse tells me I have to go to the waiting room.

I walk slowly to the waiting area where everyone is comforting each other. Ben and Aiden’s Dad are hugging each other with whispered comforts but I can see the pain in both of their eyes. I see Cadence talking to Larissa and Abby is in
tears. Once I enter the room I can’t contain myself anymore. I burst into tears, hysterics all the way.

Everyone stops what they’re doing.

“
What happened? Did something happen?” Aiden’s Dad is frantic.

“
They took him into surgery just now. What if he doesn’t make it? I can’t stop crying. I can’t stop picturing what my life would be without him because it’s not a life I want to live. I need him. Why does this have to happen to good people?”

I can’t stop. I can’t stop the tears from flowing and I can’t stop the negative thoughts. It’s hard to be positive when your one true love is lying lifeless in a hospital bed getting surgery performed on his brain. What the hell is there to be positive about? One false move from the doctor and his life is over. That’s all it takes. I am literally leaving my fate in these doctor’s hands. I sure hope they know what they’re doing. I hope this doctor didn’t have too much coffee today to the point that his hands are shaky because he has the jitters. I hope this doctor had enough sleep last night and doesn’t close his eyes for a second. My head feels like it’s going to explode from all the pressure.

I don’t even have to say anything else. Everyone walks to me and envelopes me in a group hug. I let the comfort of my friends and family take hold before I finally settle down. I can’t sit here and think about this. I need to take my mind off this. I walk up to Cadence.

“
Let’s go down the hall. Not too far. I want to know when the doctor comes out. We’ll go far enough so everyone can’t hear but stay near enough so I can see when the doctor comes.”

I don’t give her much time to respond. I turn and walk away. I can hear her footsteps following me. I stop where I am comfortable.

“
Why did you leave?”

That has always been my first question. I know she was pregnant but I want the story. I want to know everything.

“
I was pregnant and had no one to go to.”

“
Don’t give me that shit! What do you mean you had no one to go to? You didn’t even tell me. How do you know what I would have said? I may have made the run with you but you didn’t even give me the courtesy to know. I had to find out through Mom.”

Anger is present in my voice. I have felt sad too long. I let my anger show because my sadness today has ripped me apart.

“
Let me explain. After I found out about the letter of recommendation, I went to a party with some friends. I ended up drinking. I felt kind of funny and wanted to go home but instead I ended up getting groped. I tried to stop it but I was dragged into a room and forced on the bed. No one knew what was going on. No one was there to save me. His name was Jeremy and he was on the football team. He succeeded in finishing. I was traumatized and I threatened that I would go to the cops but he told me that we were at a party and we were all drinking. He said that once they found alcohol and drugs in my system they would drop the charges. I didn’t even do drugs but that got me thinking that he put something in my drink. After that I felt dirty, I would take long hot showers and scrub my skin, trying to rid my body of his. Nothing I did took the memories away. I may have been drinking and possibly drugged but I was aware that it was happening. The drugs and alcohol just slowed my reflexes so I couldn’t fight him off the way I wanted. I changed after that day. I was miserable.”

I can see the pain on her face as she tells me her story.

“
Jeremy? Sounds like the same Jeremy that tried to rape me, too.”

She looks at me with her sad eyes.

“
I know and I’m sorry.”

She knows? How the hell did she know?!

“
How do you know?” I question.

“
Let me finish my story and then I will tell you. A couple weeks later I realized I missed my period. I was scared out of my mind. My first sexual encounter was with a rapist and I could possibly be carrying his child. I was doomed. I panicked. I took the test and it was positive. I think I had a nervous breakdown. I have never cried so much in my life. I told Mom about it and she told me to abort but I didn’t feel a need to kill an innocent baby because some asshole decided to stick it where it didn’t belong. Why punish a baby because of that? I told him and you know what response I got out of him?” She stops talking to wipe the tears from her eyes. “He told me that if I didn’t abort the baby, he would take the baby away. He said that his family has money and the finest lawyers and they get what they want in front of a judge. He said he would take the baby away and give the baby up for adoption. Why would anyone be so cruel? So that’s when I decided to make a run. I needed to protect the baby.”

“
How did you know Jeremy tried to rape me? Better yet, how did you know I was here?” I ask again.

“
Please don’t be mad but I have been keeping tabs on you. I made Larissa swear she wouldn’t say anything. I didn’t want my location or presence to alert Jeremy. He couldn’t know where I was. I don’t want my baby to suffer. Even though this didn’t happen the way I wanted it to, I love my son with all my heart and I have to do everything to protect him. I asked her not to say anything because the moment he finds out you’ve had any contact with me he’s going to come after me.”

She stops talking and looks at me. She’s trying to figure out what emotion she’s going to get out of me.

“
If you were trying to protect him then why are you here now? Isn’t Jeremy going to find out?” I ask because things aren’t adding up.

“
I heard what was happening and I had to be here for you. I know you haven’t seen me in a few years and I regret it. You’re always my sister and I will always be here, especially in times of need. I have someone taking care of him; someone in the law enforcement, so he won’t be getting to my son. I needed to be here for you. I am so sorry everything turned out the way it did.”

She’s crying and I can see the sincerity in her eyes as she pleads for forgiveness. I hug her and hold her tight. I never thought I would see this day again. I start crying again. When do tears finally dry up? I feel as if I cried a small pond today.

“
I am so sorry for your boyfriend. My heart aches for you. I love you, little sis.”

She hugs me tight.

I whisper back, “I love you, big sis.”

We are a crying mess. We sit there and talk and cry for at least an hour. We lost track of time. I guess that was a good thing, otherwise I would have been crying the whole
time watching the clock. We get stopped in our tracks when the doctor comes out. I look around and we all have pleading looks on our faces, hoping the doctor came back with good news.

“
Surgery was a success. He’s in the recovery room. He hasn’t woken up yet. That still may take some time. He has a bandage on his head and he still has some lacerations on his face so don’t be surprised if he’s not looking the same.”

I don’t care if he has needles sticking out of his face, if he’s alive and came back to me, he’s beautiful in my eyes. They let us all go back since he’s in recovery. We enter the room and it’s a hard sight to see. You can’t see much of his face because of the bandage and his body is still lifeless. We all take a
spot around him and all say our silent prayers for him. I reach out and touch his hand. After several minutes I hear a flat line on his machine. The doctors rush in and kick everyone out. They are frantic. They are pumping his chest. I feel the stomach bile rising as I can’t take the pain.

“
What is happening?!” I yell.

No one answers me. I watch then continuously pump his chest. “Oh my God, what is going on?!”

I don’t stick around for answers. I run to the bathroom as I feel the bile start to rise. I can’t see anymore. I am hyperventilating. I feel as if I might pass out. I go to kneel because I can feel the vomit at the back of my throat but my leg gives out under me and I crash to the floor hitting the toilet on my down. The excruciating pain I feel tells me something is completely wrong. I scream for help as I am starting to get dizzy. Please let my baby be alright. Please let this day be over. I silently pray for everything to be okay. I feel myself being moved and I hear voices. They are talking so fast I can’t make out the words. I feel myself being lifted and I am moving fast. I am fading in and out of consciousness when the last words I hear before everything goes black are, “Get her to OR-1. We need to perform an emergency C-section. Is there a heartbeat on the baby?”

Epilogue

Serena

Five Years Later

I stand here in bridal room, procrastinating getting ready. All
the women have left my room to give me some space because I nearly fainted from my nerves feeling like they are on fire. This will be the happiest day of my life but it is also the scariest. I stand at the full length mirror and stare at myself. I don’t even recognize the person in the mirror. I don’t recognize the fear I see in my eyes.

I trace the tattoo on my chest. When I turned eighteen, I decided to get a meaningful tattoo. I have on my chest right above my heart, an infinity tattoo. One loop has the name Violet and the other has the name Aiden. The two people that mean the most to me will always be in my heart, inside and out. I never wanted a tattoo but after Aiden’s accident, I felt it necessary. I find that it shows who has the key to my heart. When I get nervous or scared, I trace my finger over the loops to give me that little extra courage that I need to get through it.

I still remember the day like it was yesterday.

I woke up and realized I was in a hospital bed. I freaked out because I no longer had a belly. I was all alone and my baby was gone. What was even more upsetting was I remembered why I was here. I remember the flat line telling me my other half was taken from me. That was what set this frightful night. I started crying hysterically when I heard something beep next to me. It was a machine. The door opens and a nurse walks in with a baby.

“
Oh look, Mommy decided to wake,” she said to the baby before looking up at me. “Now that you are awake, would you like to meet your baby girl?”

Oh my God! My baby is alive? That gave me a little more hope.

I don’t even answer but she can see the glimmer in my eyes as I have been waiting for this moment. She walks over to me and lays the baby in my arms. I look at her wrapped in a pink blanket with a pink hat on her head. I lift her hat and see blonde hair. I start to cry. She has Aiden’s hair. She has the cutest little button nose and at that moment she decides to open her eyes and I seen that she has a blue/violet color. I am torn. She is the most beautiful baby, reminding me so much of Aiden. I can see both of us in her.

“
Hey Babygirl. I’m so happy to see you finally. I’m sorry if I made you come early or if I stressed you out any but I will make sure you get everything you want in life. I love you so much.”

I cuddle her and kiss forehead. When I leaned and kissed her, I smelled her and she had that new baby smell.

“
So do we have a name yet?”

“
I was thinking of naming her Violet Theresa as a tribute because her father didn’t make it and because Aiden’s mother’s name was Theresa.”

“
You mean Aiden Clark? The guy that had the head trauma?”

“
Yeah he was my whole world,” I say as the tears start to form.