Never Say Love (7 page)

“Mmm,” she mumbled, nodding.

Frowning, Benito pulled back, looking down at her from his position above, “What do you mean, ‘mmm?’ ” He raised himself up on his elbow, looking down at her, “Have you done this? You
have
had sex before?” his tone, not harsh but firm.

Looking up at him, her big blue eyes filled with tears, as she shook her head, her bottom lip quivering—a single tear making it’s away down her flushed cheeks.

“I’m sorry Lucy, I can’t do this.” He sat up straight away shaking his head and moved off the bed. He reached for his shorts and pulled them on before sitting back down on the edge of the bed. Turning, he looked at her, shaking his head, “I’m sorry Lucy, I can’t. I won’t take that from you.”

Standing, he started to leave, turning back as he approached the door he saw her wrapped in the white sheet, her head buried in the pillow, sobbing.

Lifting her head from the pillow she looked towards him, “Please,” she begged, “please, it has to be someone—I
like
you, please.”

He just looked at her, “No, I can’t. Your first time has to be so special. Not after one date! I would never do that to you, ever.”

Thoughts of Adrianna and the boy he’d killed for taking her virginity flooded into his mind. He had no issue in having a one night stand but, this—taking someone for the first time; it was against all of his principals. “No,” he said again firmly.

Glancing at his watch he saw it was 11pm. “It’s late, you sleep there. I’ll use the guest room.”

Picking up the rest of his clothes, he left the bedroom, turning all but one table lamp off. He listened to the gentle sobs of his beautiful girl as she lay in his bed.

Lying in the guest bed he looked at the ceiling, focussing on nothing. Closing his eyes, in his head he spoke to his mother, Sophia, asking for guidance.

There is no way he would ever take that from a girl, not after one date.

The sound of his phone ringing woke Benito from his troubled sleep. Sitting up, he focussed on his surroundings. Shit, the guest room. Lucy was next door. Glancing at his phone he saw
international call
, it would be Franco. Choosing not to take the call he rejected it, tossing his phone on the bed. He couldn’t do with his father at this time of the morning, especially knowing what he had to deal with first—Lucy!

Wandering out of the room and into the kitchen, he started to make coffee; before using the bathroom he glanced in on his room seeing Lucy curled up on her side. He liked her, he liked her a lot, yet something felt different with her, apart from the fact that she was untouched. He admired her for that, saving herself. But why had she decided that he was to be the one? She must have had countless offers in the past so
why
him
? Shaking his head, he ventured back towards the kitchen.

Benito poured himself a mug of coffee, showered and dressed before checking on Lucy again. She was still asleep. Looking at his watch, it was only nine; he decided to call his father back. Moving to the balcony, taking his coffee with him, he called Franco who answered quickly.

“Morning dad. What’s up? You wouldn’t normally call so early.” He grumbled whilst slurping at his mug.

“Are you okay?” Franco asked, “Is everything okay there?”

“Fine, in fact, great, well sort of. Why? You’ve seen the figures haven’t you, the ones I sent through mid week? Turnovers up, contracts are doubled.” Benito defended himself; he felt he’d done a great job of growing the UK operation.

“That’s just it son, you’ve put some noses seriously out of place. We’ve received threats here, demands about some of the contracts you’ve picked up.”

“Demands?” Benito questioned.

“Yes, demanding that you pull out so that the original provider gets the business back.”

Frowning, Benito shook his head, “So, if we offer a better service at the same price, or keener, then surely it’s up to our client who they use.”

Benito was aware of his father breathing deeply. “You’re right son, but I just wanted to let you know, be careful. I don’t want
any
trouble. We can’t afford,
you
can’t afford, for anyone to go digging around in your history,” he paused, “you know what I’m talking about son—Adrianna!”

Hell, that’s all Benito needed, someone potentially digging around in his past, raking up the fact that he’d killed that young creep, the bastard who had taken something that was so precious.

“I’ll watch out dad. If you hear anything else, let me know, yeah?” Benito asked as he sipped his coffee.

“I will do, just watch your back. I know you can look after yourself, but just… well, I’ve passed the message on. Call me if you want me or if you need anything.”

Clearing the call, Benito finished his coffee before going back inside. Checking the bedroom, she was still sleeping. There was no way he was going to wake her, not yet anyway. What the hell would he say to her? Shit!

Pouring another coffee, he sat on the sofa thinking about Lucy, his dad, Adrianna and his mother.
Oh mama, what do I do with Lucy?
He looked up as he spoke in his head to his mother.

Maggie’s words came back to him, “Franco would approve, Sophia would approve.” He knew she was right, his father would adore Lucy and so would his mother.

Away with his thoughts, business, his father, his mother,
Lucy
—he was unaware of her appearing from the bedroom.

“Morning Benito,” she spoke quietly. “Where’s the bathroom?”

Startled to hear her voice, he turned slowly, pointing towards the bathroom door. He watched her, wrapped in the sheet as she disappeared. Drinking his coffee, he perched on the sofa waiting for her to return, he wanted to talk to her. He
wanted
to give her a dressing down over what she’d done.

Looking down at the floor, his fingers in his hair, he waited and waited. It was evident that she was delaying coming out. He couldn’t hear the shower run; she must have been just standing there.

Unable to wait in the bathroom any longer, delaying the inevitable meeting, she opened the door, allowing him to pounce. “What the hell do you think you were doing last night? Have you
no
self respect?” His deep voice was firm.

Shocked to hear him, she stood still, just looking at him, her large blue eyes startled at his announcement, filling with tears again.

Ignoring him she walked quickly to his bedroom, scrambling her clothes together and dressed quickly, raking her fingers through her hair and making herself look as presentable as possible.

Sitting back down on the sofa he waited for her to appear again.

Emerging from his bedroom she spoke softly, “Benito.”

Looking directly at her, drawn to the blue eyes, red from crying, her hair wrecked from sleep, the blush dress clung to her perfect figure.

“Morning Lucy,” he looked away, speaking calmly now, “we need to talk,” he muttered, “about last night.”

Walking over to the window she gazed out at the London skyline, “I’m sorry,” she whispered, “I’m so sorry.”

Benito sighed, his head buried in his hands. “I would never ever do that to any girl, you know the first time has to be special, perfect. Not after one date. You were wrong to expect me to,” he paused, “to do that to you. For heaven’s sake Lucy, do you really not respect yourself?” His tone became harsh again as he stood behind her, frowning. “Lucy, I can’t believe what you expected me to do.”

He watched as she laid her palms on the glass, her head forward and her shoulders heaving gently as she sobbed quietly. He felt lost. Sure he’d dealt with tears before, with the emotional stuff that plagued girls. With his sister, that had been some emotional shit, but this was totally alien. Standing, he walked over to her. “Lucy, please don’t cry,” he stood behind her, not wanting to touch her, determined to keep his distance.

Turning around she faced him, he was truly handsome. What a catch and she’d frightened him away, all because she’d saved herself for someone that she felt really drawn to. Now that person was here, the man she fancied the pants off, the one who saved her from those creeps last night, and he was ready to run away because she was still bloody innocent.
Was this going to happen every time she met someone she really liked?

“Dry your face tesoro. Do you want something to eat?” He mumbled as he backed away, heading for the kitchen.

“I’m not hungry. Can you take me home, please?”

“Sure.” He inwardly breathed a sigh of relief.

Leaving the apartment and taking the lift downstairs, they were soon in the Range Rover and heading towards Lucy’s flat.

“I’m sorry,” she muttered again, “I do like you. I hope this hasn’t affected any relationship we can have, really.”

He didn’t answer, choosing to feign concentration on the road ahead.

“Benito, please talk to me, please.” Feeling tears prick her eyes again she turned away, breathing deeply, trying her hardest to fight back the tears, “talk to me,
please
!”

Refusing to engage in any discussion, he continued his journey to her flat. Only when he pulled up outside did he speak.

“You shouldn’t have done it!” He snapped at her, “You should have told me, not led me on like that.” Looking at her firmly, he gave her a dressing down. “It was wrong Lucy, totally wrong!”

Fighting the tears back she looked at him through her tear filled eyes.

“But,” she sobbed.

Finishing off her sentence for her, “But I would like to see you again.” He smiled softly, “but honesty, going forward, I must have total honesty.”

Nodding, she wiped her face with the back of her hand, “I promise.”

“And do you promise not to go and work for that letch on Monday morning and to come and work with me as my P.A?”

Searching for a tissue in her handbag, she wiped her face, “What about Isabella?”

“She works for me. She’ll do as I ask. I’d like you to work with me. And I’d like you to move out of this dump!” He looked towards the converted house, a look of distaste over his face.

Looking horrified as he described her flat as a “dump”. “Oh, well I can’t afford to move out.” She hissed, standing up for herself.

“Well you’ll be able to on your new salary. I’ll pick you up later, and we’ll discuss the details over dinner. Where do you fancy going?”

“What if I’m busy this evening?” She half smiled, teasing him as she wiped the remainder of her tears away.

Smiling, “Oh, but I bet you’re not.” His tone becoming soft again as he reached towards her cheek, his thumb gently brushing a tear away.

“What if I say no?” She asked, teasing him again.

“You won’t.”

“How do you know I won’t say no?”

“I just know, and anyway I nearly always get what I want. So where do you want to go?”

“Do you?” Lucy frowned, “always get what you want?”

“Yes, I do. So where shall we go this evening?” He asked again, smiling broadly.

“There’s a little steak house just around the corner, look!” she pointed in the general direction of the restaurant she had suggested. Following her hand as she flapped it around, he smiled to himself, “there’s normally no need to book,” she added.

“Okay, I’ll pick you up about eight?”

Lucy smiled. She really liked him and felt terrible about last night. Was it really so wrong of her to do what she did? Lowering her head, her hands on her handbag, she mumbled, “And, I really am sorry, I’m so sorry about last night.”

Benito breathed deeply. “It’s okay, no worries,” he gently placed his hand on top of hers, “but you shouldn’t have let me believe that…” he paused closing his eyes for a moment, thinking about what he was going to say next, “you shouldn’t have let me think that it was okay, when it wasn’t.” Turning, he looked at her, her head still down, her stunning silky blonde hair falling forward around her shoulders. He couldn’t shake this feeling off. What he felt for her was like
nothing else he had ever experienced before, with any woman. Lucy
was
different. It was almost as if there was a magnet drawing him to her.

Before stepping out of the car, she leaned over and placed a gentle kiss on Benito’s cheek. “Thank you. I’m really looking forward to this evening.” She smiled, “I can’t wait.”

He nodded in acknowledgement, a grin across his beautiful mouth, “I’m looking forward to it too. I’d like to know more about you.”
What the hell was he saying, shit man, pull yourself together.

At a little before eight Benito arrived outside Lucy’s flat. He called in on Gia and Roberto and received an inquisition about his love interest, to their knowledge the only girl that Benito had ever shown any
long term
interest in. He had cringed at their questions and had no doubt that Franco would be made aware before long; yeah, Gia the busy-body, would certainly tell her husband’s cousin.

After spending an hour with them, he’d gone home where he’d made a special effort preparing for the evening. He showered, carefully shaved and dressed in smart black trousers and a pale grey shirt. He took some time to catch up with some friends from home telling them about Lucy. They laughed and told him that it wouldn’t have worried them; the fact that she was untouched, she’d wanted it so why not let the lady have what she wanted! He stood in front of the dressing table mirror.
Shit, paying all this attention for a girl!
He thought to himself.

He drove to Lucy’s and pulled up outside. Waiting outside, he sounded his horn for a second time before glancing at his watch. Breathing deeply his mouth drew into a tight line. She was late! Looking at the clock in the Range Rover, checking that the time was right, he started to grow impatient as the digital figures clicked over to 8.15. One thing he could not abide was tardiness. This was something he’d need to discuss with her if she was going to be late getting to the office in the mornings, the arrangement wouldn’t work. It would drive him mad.

Starting to feel as though he’d been stood up, he shuffled in his seat, cursing himself for letting a woman get under his skin.
You stupid fool; you should have sent her away when you had the chance.

Fucking hell, should he just leave? Looking at his watch and sounding the horn one more time he became increasingly restless and pulled his mobile from his trouser pocket. Scrolling down to James’ number, he was about to call him and ask if he fancied meeting for a drink when he heard his name being called. Turning, he caught sight of Lucy, looking flustered, as she skipped down the steps.

As she came closer he watched her, the beautiful Lucy, her hair down, falling around her shoulders. She opened the car door and climbed in he focussed on her large blue eyes looking up at him.

“You’re late!” He said firmly as she fastened her seat belt. “I don’t
do
late. I hope you won’t be late for work.” Turning away from her, not looking at her, he started to pull away from the kerb, leaving her looking shocked by his chastisement. Running her hands down the pale green flowing top she was wearing she tried to calm her nerves, feeling too shocked and taken back to answer him.

Looking sideways he noticed the feminine top she wore over a pair of skinny white jeans. The softness of the fabric clung to her figure, emphasising her small breasts, the bell sleeves gave the garment a medieval look. He liked it. He liked ladies to be feminine.

Drawing a deep breath and turning to towards him she said softly, “I’m sorry, I couldn’t get in the bathroom to get ready, my flat mates are all out tonight too,” she mumbled. “I’m really sorry, and no I won’t be late for work because I’m always out before them, they’re students.”

He huffed, disregarding her excuses and looked towards her. “I’m taking a chance on you Lucy. You know that normally I would have gone through with the interview process and let Isabella choose someone for me. Don’t let me down and please
don’t
be late again!” he frowned.

She glared at him, huffing. “I’ve said I’m sorry, I’ve even given you a bloody reason why I was late—get over it!” She snapped, standing up for herself. “Now is this evening on or off.
Because if it’s off, let me know so that I can get out now and join my friends!” Her voice slightly raised, her body language telling him that here was a woman who would not be walked over. No, Lucy Wilson-Hawley stood up for herself!

Benito was stunned at her response. Sitting back slightly, he turned towards her again and looked at the way she held herself. My God this woman was something else, how the hell did he manage to pick this one out? Not only had she offered herself to him last night, wanting him to be her first ever lover and now she was here, sitting in his car standing up to him. Benito Abelli, the man that almost everyone else bowed down to, well metaphorically speaking anyway!
You really like her, don’t you?
His subconscious told him.

Pulling the car into a parking space, he shook his head as he slid out onto the street. Pushing the voice in his head away he walked around to Lucy’s side and offered his arm as she exited the car. She just stood there, looking at him, “Well!” she demanded.

“Well what?”

“What do you say, Mr High-and-mighty.”

Shaking his head he was lost, she’d totally lost him, “About what?”

“About having a go at me, I said I’m sorry
and
I told you what happened so
you
need to apologise for having a go at me!”

Standing outside the restaurant he looked towards her, cocking an eyebrow, he studied her face, a beautifully symmetrical face, those clear blue eyes, the rosebud of a mouth, high cheek bones with just the faintest hint of blush and that gorgeous hair.
Apologise Benito
the little voice inside his head commanded. Who the hell
was
in his head telling him what to do? Shit, he was in a mess. She was killing him!

After vowing never to have a steady woman in his life, he now felt totally out of control, sucked into her.

“Sorry,” he mumbled, “can we eat now?”

“Apology accepted and yes, I’m famished.” She laughed.

Taking the arm that he offered, she placed her delicate hand on his forearm as she had done when they’d walked around Covent Garden, allowing him to lead the way into the restaurant.

The place was already busy with only a few tables free. They were offered a table in the window which he was grateful for; he didn’t want to be secluded with this woman who seemed to have some kind of mind-control over him. How the hell was he going to cope when he was working with her?
Shit, what the hell have you done?
The little voice resounded in his head.
She really is killing you, ha ha!

Glancing at the wine list, he ordered a bottle
of Valpolicella before studying through the menu. He really should get to know more about her, especially now that he’d effectively hired her as his P.A.

Once they’d ordered their food, both choosing the
filet mignon, Lucy opting for a salad accompaniment whilst Benito chose steak cut chips, he watched her. Turning the stem of his wine glass he asked, “So, Lucy, tell me a little bit more about yourself.” Lifting the glass to his lips he watched her as she studied him, formulating her answer. She looked at the dark, dark eyes set under perfectly arched brows, square, masculine chin cleanly shaven and a broad mouth with full lips, the perfect bow. Every time she looked at him she saw something different, saw something new that attracted her more to him.

“What do you want to know?”

“Everything.” His deep voice rumbled, his tone demanding as he half smiled, his body language, whilst relaxed as he sat back in his chair, his fingers running along the edge of the table, he studied her.

Leaning forward, Lucy whispered, just loud enough for him to hear. “Really, well you must surely know that keeping hold of my virginity was the biggest mistake of my life. It’s just a big turn off now, isn’t it?” Sitting back she sighed, “You sent me away.” She added, looking down at her lap, her hands wringing together.

Benito looked at her before gazing around the restaurant at the other diners and then up to the ceiling. Shaking his head, he puffed his cheeks out before blowing out and extending his hand over the table.

“Lucy, give me your hand, please.” He looked seriously at her, willing her to comply.

Holding her forehead in her hand, she closed her eyes for a second, feeling awkward at the conversation that was taking place, this discussing her virginity with an amazing looking guy.

Slowly lifting her delicate hand from below the table she placed it in his, her fine fingers sitting easily in his larger hands.

“Lucy, what you kept is precious, don’t think badly of yourself. It’s a gift, something so special for you and for the man you choose to give it to, not for a quick fling.” As he said the words, he stunned himself. It was as if he was opening his mouth and someone else’s words were coming out. Of course, he hoped that she’d give it to him, desperately.

Smiling, she looked at him and, after taking another large drink of her wine on an empty stomach, she was fuelled with
Dutch courage, randomly blurting out. “My new boss is great, he’s
so
good looking…” gasping at her own statement, her eyes widened, “Sorry, I didn’t mean to say that.” She looked down at her lap again, half laughing, he cheeks flushing, “I’m so sorry.”

The awkward moment passed as she recounted her childhood memories, growing up with an older brother, he was the same age as Benito. Some of the things they got up to together, Michael, or Mikey as she called him, always blaming his younger sister for the trouble they got into, her father never believing him, of course. She told Benito that, in her father’s eyes, she could do no wrong.

As he sat watching her articulating her conversation with her hands, his thoughts drifted. He’d always said that he would not fall into the same trap as his father, giving his life and soul to Sophia and then making that vow, the promise never to love again. Maybe he was changing; he was
deeply
attracted to pure, innocent Lucy.

He watched her as she spoke, telling him about her mum and how they got on so much better now that she’d left home. He smiled as she laughed at her own comments about her father. He learnt, or assumed, that she must have a strong bond with her dad, smiling as she spoke about him. Her face hardened a little as she spoke about her workplace. Somehow, he felt, that she went to work out of necessity and certainly not because she liked it.

Mesmerised by her life story, he just sat staring at her continuing to turn the stem of his wine glass as he listened intently.

“So you’ve stayed pretty local all of your life?” he asked

“Yep,” she giggled, “I’ve not ventured too far.”

“And you think you’re going to like your new job, seriously?” Benito asked as their meals arrived.

“Oh yes, definitely, I think that I’ll love it. Working for such a kind man helps.” She looked up from her steak and salad, smiling at him sweetly.

Grinning, and shaking his head, he half laughed at her, “I’m pleased, I really am.”

“We
are
a team, aren’t we? You and me and the new office staff,” she asked, cutting into the butter soft steak.

“
Yes. But just remember when you work for me, you’re my personal assistant and the office manager. You’ll be passing the work onto them. There will be some work that I don’t want
them
knowing about, some that only you will know. That doesn’t worry you, does it?”

He watched as she laid her knife and fork on her plate, thinking before she answered, “I don’t think so.”

They ate in relative silence, exchanging glances and smiles.

He shrugged as he cleared his plate, looking at the amount of food she’d left, “Seriously Lucy, there are some things I don’t want everyone knowing, ever. How much the business is worth, how much we charge. I don’t want them knowing the names of some of our clients. In Italy they come to us because we’re discrete—we don’t publicise the names of the people we work for. Then there are the surveillance jobs that we do, things that I really wouldn’t want being made public. I will have to ask you to sign a confidentiality agreement.”

Shrugging her shoulders nonchalantly she smiled, “That’s okay,” she watched him longingly again, focussing on his beautiful mouth and his broad chest. Of course, she knew exactly what lay beneath and still, even after last night, wanted him to be her first— something she’d really have to work on.

Once he’d paid the bill, following an argument regarding Lucy’s offer to pay half, they left the restaurant. “Would you like to go to a bar?” he asked as she slid her hand into his arm.

“I’d love to,” she held on tightly as they walked, “there’s a wine bar down here.” She pointed in the direction of a bar that she regularly visited. Feeling so very relaxed in his company, kicking her feet along as they strolled down the street, “this is lovely,” she mused.

Placing his hand on top of hers, as it rested in the crook of his elbow, he turned towards her. “What is?”

Shrugging her shoulders slightly, she turned towards him, “Just this, just walking along on someone’s arm.”

“So, what would you normally do on an evening out?” Benito asked as they walked past a particularly noisy group of young people walking towards them, his arm unhooking itself from hers and slipped around her waist, holding her protectively.

She shrugged, “Sometimes I stay in with a bottle of wine—just me or with my friends, not the girls I live with, they’re not really friends, just flat mates. Other times, I go out with my friends from work, but Henry’s was a
real
treat, it’s
so
expensive. But I got to meet you.” She laughed.