Never Say Never (Lakeview Contemporary Romance Book 3) (30 page)

Still, Leah wondered then, as she listened to her friend trying to convince Kate to forgive and forget, would Olivia – the strongest and most magnanimous person she had ever known – be so willing to do that herself, once she came face to face with Robin again?

I
t had been
seven long years since she’d seen the place, and still Robin didn’t miss it. Too many bad memories, she supposed, looking tentatively around the arrivals area of Dublin airport. Too many painful reminders of everything that had gone wrong in her life since university, and not enough positives to balance things out. Still, it would have been nice to have had the time to go home to Waterford this weekend, she thought, but because this would be a very short stay, her mum was traveling up on the train to visit her.

Having obtained the obligatory shin-bashing from the golf-club brigade at the carousel, which really helped her mood, Robin eventually claimed her luggage and made her way through customs. She paused slightly before coming through to the arrivals area. Would she recognise anyone? Worse – would anyone recognise
her
? Oh, come off it! she admonished herself. Who do you think you are – Madonna? Of course no-one would recognise her – no one knew she was here yet, did they?

Two weeks ago, Leah had been on the phone giving her hell for not letting her know.

“I can’t believe you wouldn’t tell me something like this,” she’d said, and by her tone Robin knew that she was genuinely hurt. She felt bad about not telling her, but it was all happening so fast, and around the time of the Nickelodeon deal, Leah had emailed Robin, informing her that she’d just broken up with Josh.

“Oh, Leah, of course I wanted to tell you, but I didn’t think it would be right for me to say: ‘You know, I’m very sorry that your heart is broken and that you’re going through hell – but I really have to tell you that I’ve just landed myself a major publishing deal.’ What would you have done?”

To her surprise, Leah laughed. “I see your point. And sorry for being such a Moany Minnie.”

“Oh for goodness’ sake, how many times did I moan down the phone to you over the years?”

“Well, plenty, now that you say it, but not since you met Ben. How are things going there by the way?”

Again, Robin wasn’t quite sure what to say. Surely the last thing Leah needed to hear was that she and Ben were planning on buying a house and settling down. Particularly when, not too long ago, Leah and her boyfriend had been making the very same plans.

“He’s fine,” was all she said.

“And is he coming home with you? Oh, I really can’t believe you’re coming back.”

Robin couldn’t quite bring herself to match her excitement. “No – he has to work – not to mention the fact that this trip has been sprung on us a bit.”

“‘
Robin takes publishing world by storm’
, eh?”

“Believe me, Leah, I’m as stunned by all the fuss as you are.”

“So when
are
you coming home then?”

Robin hesitated. She’d have to see her – she
wanted
to see her, but if seeing Leah meant seeing anyone else, well …

“It isn’t finalised but probably soon. They want to ‘strike while the iron’s hot’, or some such.”

Leah chuckled. “Poor Amanda is inconsolable that you’ll be appearing on TV. You do know that’s her life-long dream, don’t you?”

Robin nodded, remembering. “Well, she could go on instead if she likes. A rabbit caught in the headlights will have nothing on me.” Her heart sank as once again it hit home to her how close and involved in one another’s lives her old college friends still seemed to be.

“You’ll be great.”

“So,” Robin tried to make her voice sound casual, but her heart was hammering, “have the others heard about all this or –?”

“Of course they’ve heard about it – it’s the best bit of gossip we’ve had in years.” Leah enthused. “Amanda’s green with envy obviously, but she did say to pass on her congratulations. Olivia’s pleased for you, and Kate well, of course Kate’s delighted too.” She hid it well but nevertheless Robin picked up on Leah’s hesitation. She wasn’t too surprised. True to form, Kate had obviously never forgiven her for not returning home for the funeral.

“And, Olivia – how’s she doin’?” Robin asked carefully. “You know, I never did get round to ringing her, I have her number somewhere but –”

“How’s she
doin’
?’” Leah mimicked in an exaggerated New York drawl. “You sound like Tony Soprano. And you’re telling me that Ballyhooley
Ben
lost his accent?”

“It’s Ballymoney actually, and believe me, that’s nothing compared to him.”

“Mmm, we’ll see about that when you come home,” Leah replied and again, Robin’s heart plummeted. “But yes, Olivia’s ‘
doin
’’ fine. Very fine, actually.” Robin could hear the smile in her voice. “She’s starting seeing this lovely guy, Matt. It’s early days but he’s a dote, and they seem really well suited. He’s a single parent too.”

Robin was so stunned by this she could barely speak. “Really?” she answered, afraid that Leah might notice. She really didn’t think Olivia would ever –

“Yeah, I know what you’re thinking. I honestly didn’t think she’d find anyone else after Peter either. But it’s been years now and – time to move on, I suppose.”

“Well, good on her,” But Robin was still amazed. Olivia adored Peter – there had never been anyone else other than him, and she clearly remembered her vowing that there never would be. This Matt must be pretty special.

“But I’m sure you’ll meet them all again soon,” Leah said airily.

“Well, I hope so but the schedule is pretty hectic, and I might not have much time …” Robin left it at that, unwilling to make any concrete arrangements to see Leah, let alone ‘them all’.

Now, sitting in a taxi and heading towards her city-centre hotel, Robin wondered what lay ahead. She thought back to the last time they had all been together, just days before graduation, back before they went out into the big bad world, and everything went a little crazy. They had been so confident, so cheerful so optimistic about life. They all knew where they were going, and what they wanted to do, and despite their petty little differences, were so sure that they would honour their reunion, so sure that the friendship would stay the same forever.

Didn’t any of them, Robin thought, feeling a curious mixture of sadness and regret as they drove along O’Connell Street, realise how naïve they had been?

T
he morning
of her thirtieth birthday was bright and sunny, and Leah tried her utmost to feel the same. Thanks to Olivia’s insistence that she mark the occasion in some small way, she was actually starting to look forward to the celebrations the following night. She’d booked a table at her favourite Thai restaurant, and was anticipating a nice cosy dinner with Olivia, Kate and their respective partners. Josh, the previous week, had moved all his belongings out of the apartment, and Leah was beginning to come to terms with the fact that it was well and truly over.

So, it might not have been the best idea to invite some loved-up couples when all it would do is painfully highlight her single status, but blast it, it would do her good to get out and have a laugh with her friends. Thirty was a landmark birthday after all, and despite the fact that she hadn’t had all that much to celebrate lately, she was damned if she was going to let it pass without event.

“Not true,” Olivia had said defiantly when Leah was bemoaning the fact the other day. “What about Elysium? Isn’t your talent and your success something to celebrate?”

Ever the optimist, Olivia was right. Yes, her love-life was a disaster, but at least she still had her dream.
But at what cost?
the little voice inside piped up and, instantly, something tightened in Leah’s stomach. She waved the thought away and went back to getting out this morning’s batch of white chocolate and blueberry specials.
Think positive.

Just before lunchtime, the telephone rang.

“Lee, don’t kill me but I think I’m going to have to give the dinner a miss tomorrow night.” On the other end of the phone, Kate’s pleading tone was palpable.

“What? Why?” Leah was taken aback. “What’s going on?”

“Well, it’s Dylan,” Kate answered. “He’s running a bit of a fever and I’m afraid to leave him, just in case.”

“Oh.” OK, Leah thought, trying to be rational. A sick child was a perfectly decent excuse for crying off on your heartbroken friend’s only hope of a social life – a very good excuse actually. But without Kate and Michael, she couldn’t possibly expect Olivia and poor Matt to travel up to Dublin to baby-sit her on her birthday. That would be pathetic. Then she thought of something.

“But what about Michael?” she asked reasonably. “Couldn’t he keep an eye on him tomorrow night? And surely he will have improved by then?” Problem solved, she thought. Actually, a girls-only night was probably a better idea. Then again, considering that their last two attempts at a girls-only night had ended badly, the first with Kate cancelling, and the second with the three of them arguing, it might not be the best idea after all.

But there was a silence on the other end of the phone and, instantly, Leah realised she had said the wrong thing, although she wasn’t exactly sure what.

“I wouldn’t be able to enjoy it, Leah,” Kate said shortly. “Perhaps he will be better by then but I’d still be worrying about him all night.”

Disappointment coursed through Leah as she tried desperately to see things from her friend’s point of view but failed miserably. It wasn’t as though it was a competition or anything – after all, she was Kate’s friend, but Dylan was her son and Leah would never expect Kate to choose her over him. Yet, Kate had been the very one to admit that he wasn’t exactly at death’s door, that he was just ‘running a bit of a fever’ – so why all the drama? Michael could keep an eye on him – after all, he was equally responsible for Dylan’s welfare, wasn’t he?

“I’m sorry, Leah, you know how it is.” As far as Kate was concerned the conversation was over. The choice had been made. Broken-hearted friend, baby with a slight fever? No contest.

“Yes, I do.” She tried to keep the almost unbearable disappointment out of her voice. She’d be there for Kate, wouldn’t she? In fact, she had been there for Kate, many times over the years, helping her nurse every broken heart, letting her cry on her shoulder and then going out and getting rip-roaring drunk in order to forget about which ‘him’ happened to be the problem. Did motherhood mean that was the end of all that then?

“Well, look … have a really good night, and we’ll meet up soon – for dinner or something, OK?” Kate said absently.

“Sure.” Leah was so hurt she could hardly speak. She couldn’t believe that it had happened again with Kate. She knew having children changed your life, but did it change it to the point where you no longer cared about your friends?

“Obviously,” Andrew said, when he rang that afternoon to wish her a happy birthday and Leah told him what Kate had said. “It isn’t the first time Kate’s cried off like that, is it?”

“No.” Kate had also missed a recent outing in the city, giving some other life or death situation with Dylan as an excuse. “I just don’t understand it. I’m trying to see things from Kate’s point of view but, to be honest, I’m finding it difficult.” She bit her lip. “You’d think, what with being stuck on her own all day every day with the child that she’d love the opportunity to let her hair down.”

“I’m so sorry that we can’t go either, Leah. But being so close to time, Amanda is as crabby as anything and –”

“Oh, don’t be silly, I wouldn’t expect you to,” she answered.

“I suppose children do change things alright,” Andrew went on, referring to Kate.

“I know,” said Leah. “It’s just that, out of all people, Kate was the last one I would have pegged for a fussy old mammy. It just isn’t like her. Remember the days when we used to get thrown out of pubs for dancing on tables?” despite her heavy heart, she giggled, “or getting caught by the guards for tipping cows.”

“Tipping cows? What the …? ”

Leah giggled. “Oh, never mind.”

“No, tell me.”

“Well, it’s something you do in the dead of night – usually on the way home from the pub. You go into a field of sleeping cattle, simply give them a little nudge and … hey presto! Easy as you like, they topple over onto the ground.”

“And isn’t that a little unfair to the misfortunate cows?”

“I know – but when you’ve a few drinks in you, it’s the most hilarious thing ever.” Leah shook her head. “But we’re from the country, remember?”

“Ah yes, culchies – they really are a breed in themselves,” Andrew teased.

Leah raised a smile, remembering her and Kate’s young, free and single days. It hurt deeply that Kate was unwilling to make the effort, not just for her birthday, but for her sake. Still Kate had responsibilities now and she couldn’t just take off and …

Suddenly it hit Leah that she was the only one of the old gang left that was alone, truly alone. Kate had her family, Amanda and Andrew were about to have their first baby, Olivia had Ellie and now she had Matt, and if things went well – which she hoped they would – they were as good as a family too. The realisation stung, and all of a sudden, Leah wanted Josh badly. She wanted the security of not having to depend on tearing her friends away from their families to entertain her, to keep her from going crazy, to keep her from feeling lonely.

Yet, being lonely wasn’t a good enough reason to go back, was it? Despite Olivia’s insistence that it was always possible to forgive and forget, and despite Leah’s admission at Kate’s that she might be able to forgive Josh, deep down she really didn’t think she’d have it in her. She would always be watching, wondering, worrying …

But, Leah thought, as she said goodbye to yet another happily attached friend, maybe that was better than being alone.