New World Rising (12 page)

“He doesn't really give me the warm and fuzzies either, but he is a product of the world he was born into. Maddox wasn't raised like us. He never chose to be part of a Tribe. It was forced on him.”

I thought of my own upbringing. I was born a child of The Sanctuary, but Tartarus raised me. And I was still a better person than he was.  "I believe it’s our choices that make us who we are and his certainly define him."

Triven was quiet for a while as he slowly nodded his head. "You're right. We may be handed a certain deck of cards but it is our choice how to play them. Maddox struggles with his inner demons every day, but remember, he
chose
to leave his Tribe and join us. His sins may be different from yours and mine, but we all sin.”

He was right.

“Come on. We can still get a little sleep before tomorrow.” Triven dropped his hands from my neck and I followed him back to our room, feeling ashamed.

I NEVER THOUGHT
I would miss the wretched stench of Tartarus, but as the tainted air blew across my face I realized I did. It felt like so long since I felt outside air on my face, or saw the hazy night sky.

Triven shifted next to me. His ever-watchful eyes were, like mine, trained on the streets below us. Across the alley a shadow moved in the darkness. I knew Arden was just as restless as we were.

It was taking too long.

Archer and her team disappeared into the warehouse over thirty minutes ago and those of us left to stand guard were starting to get anxious. The day had passed in a blur. I couldn’t remember eating or working or moving at all, but somehow I was now crouched on a rooftop surrounded by other unseen guards. I was the only one unarmed. Triven had fought for me saying I was an asset, that they could use my skills with a knife if not a gun. But Arstid wouldn’t hear of it.

“Stay close by me at all times.” Triven had murmured in my ear before we left.

I tugged idly at the fastenings on my vest. It was supposed to suppress body heat, to protect me, but I hated it. It felt awkward and heavy. Restraining.

“Leave it.” Triven shot me a look as I pulled on the straps.

I scowled without looking at him, keeping my eyes on the street. “I did just fine without one of these things for six years, why do I need it now?”

“Humor me.” He adjusted his gun on the roof’s ledge.

I patted the rectangular shape hidden under my vest. My father’s notebook was carefully concealed beneath the fold of restraining fabric. I had left Mouse with Veyron. At least I knew she would be in good hands, if I didn’t return.

I had not yet decided if I wanted to return. My mind was still warring between freedom and staying. While trapped within the cement-lined walls of The Subversive headquarters, it was easier to stay. Seeing Mouse’s innocent face, letting her tender brown eyes bore into mine made it impossible to leave her. But here, with the wind in my hair and the darkness of the night calling to me it was harder to want to go back.

When we had first emerged onto the streets I had thought about it. Barely a few seconds had passed before I had oriented myself and I knew running would be easy. I just needed the right moment. Leading the team to my roof access had been easy. I had even been impressed by how soundlessly we moved in such a large group. There were no lights on the street, and the green tinted clouds provided us with a perfect cover. When we had reached the alley, I took the rope from Triven and slung it over my shoulder without a thought. My fingers had easily found the familiar holds on the building’s pocked surface, allowing me to scale two stories in less than thirty seconds. It wasn’t until I had reached the railing and looked down that I realized this was it. This was the chance I had wanted, the moment that could lead to my freedom. The nine other bodies were waiting at the bottom for me to toss them the rope, but what if I didn’t? I knew they couldn’t follow me up the wall, not all of them anyway. I could have run. Mouse was in good hands; she would be safe under Triven’s watch. 

I could have run.

I could have, but I didn’t. Instead I had tied off the rope and tossed it down.

Now waiting in this agonizingly crouched position I wondered if I had made a mistake, if I was a fool not to have run. I didn’t get much of a chance to dwell on it though.

“They’re out.” Triven whispered as he pressed his eye to the scope.

There were five shadows moving across the warehouse roof. We watched as they maneuvered over the beam balanced between the buildings. Once all ten feet were on solid ground we were in motion.

The team was scattered across the rooftops. Arden and Maddox were three roofs behind us, and closing in. Half of the team was already a block ahead of us and we had to gain some ground if we wanted to meet at the rendezvous point at the same time. Unlike some of The Subversive members, my feet were sure on the tarred surfaces. As we sprinted over the skyline, I could see them falling behind from the corner of my eye. Surprisingly, only Triven held his ground with me, his broad chest never far from my left shoulder. When I leapt from ledge to ledge his feet were nearly in sync with mine. A smile crept to my lips. It had been so long since I had moved like this, running at full tilt above the city. Triven’s breathing next to me only heightened my ecstasy.

Ahead of us I could see the armored bodies disappear down the fire escape. Eager to beat Triven, I pushed my muscles harder. I could feel him pushing harder too.  My smile widened, then abruptly fell. We were less than twenty feet from the ladder when the gunfire rang out from below.

SCREAMS ECHOED UP
the dilapidated walls, magnifying the sound. Chills splintered their way down my spine as the shrill human cries assaulted my ears. It sounded like a war was waging below us.

Six years of instinct kicked in and I skittered to a halt, the worn gravel rooftop sliding noisily under my feet. While my body halted, Triven’s sped up. He glanced back for only a second before leaping over the edge of the building. Those were his people dying down there, his people in danger. But I didn’t have people.

Did I?

I rushed to the roof’s edge as Maddox and Arden caught up. Arden dove over the side landing on the fire escape. His feet had barely touched the rusted metal before he opened fire on the surging bodies below. Maddox spared one icy glare for me before joining the throng.

Bodies were strewn in the alley, but they weren’t ours. Their skin was tainted odd colors. Taciturns.

We were surviving, not just surviving but winning. Every member of the guard was still on their feet. I leaned out further but didn’t yet join the fight. Torn.

Run or help? Run… or stay?

I could see Triven moving below me, his sandy hair easily visible in the dark. He moved with a perilous grace. Without shedding a bullet or unsheathing a knife, he advanced like a shadow through the alley, debilitating the Tribesman as he went. It took me a moment to realize he wasn’t killing them; he was just rendering them unconscious. He moved with perfect precision. It seemed as if he saw everything around him all at once, everything but
one
man.

But I saw him.

As the tattooed arm rose, the glint of the black blade flashed in the night. There was no mistaking his target. The man’s eyes were on Triven.

I didn’t hesitate.

Launching myself from the ledge, I grabbed the fire escape railing. My hands caught for only a second, allowing me to better my aim. I dropped once more, letting two stories fall past, my hands recalculating on the next landing. Then just as quickly as before, I let go and dropped the last fifteen feet.

I could feel the man’s bones break as my feet landed on his back. The muscular body crumpled beneath me, absorbing the full impact of my fall. Triven turned in shock as I crashed down beside him. Two seconds later and there would have been a knife in his back. I wanted to keep looking into those hazel eyes, but there was no time.

Taciturns mobbed us. Everywhere I turned, tattooed bodies appeared, their weapons slashing, firing and stabbing.

Fear shut off and the instinctual animal within me was unleashed.

It took me less than three seconds to disarm an attacker and turn her weapon back on her. In another three seconds, I had a knife for my left hand and another two Taciturns lay at me feet. A gun fired somewhere near my head and I had to blink to keep my vision clear. The ringing in my ear deafened all of the other sounds in the alley. I blinked again as I struggled to find focus. There was something fuzzy coming into focus at the back of the alley. A girl was pinned to the ground with a Taciturn male over her, but she was not fighting back. Her head lolled to the side as she struggled for consciousness. I recognized the dark curly hair. Archer. The man sat astride her as his fingers traveled over her chest, the other hand pressed a knife to her throat.

I could feel a strand of sanity within me snap, and my vision went red. The knife left my hand instantly, and even as it lodged into his side I charged. I was on him before he could react. My weapons were forgotten as my fists collided over and over with his face. I knew he wasn’t one of the men who had raped my mother, he wasn’t Maddox leering at my naked body in the showers, but at that moment, he was. He was all of those things. I punched until his face was no longer recognizable.

A large hand grabbed my shoulder and spun me. I thrust to kill, and froze. My knife stopped at the assailant’s throat, a thick trickle of blood running from beneath the blade.

Triven stood frozen, his gentle eyes wide but calm as they watched me. The knife fell from my hand. It sounded so loud as it clattered to the ground.

“I’m sorry.” I said in a trembling voice. My body began to shake, but I didn’t feel cold.

“Phoenix.”  Triven whispered my name as he moved towards me, but I jumped backwards.

“I’m sorry.” I shook my head, my eyes widening. I had lost control… I had almost killed him.

He moved towards me again and this time I did not move. His muscular arms wrapped around me, and despite myself, I fell against his chest.

“I’m sorry.” Why couldn’t I find any other words?

He smoothed my hair, “It’s okay. We’re okay. We have to get moving though, it isn’t safe.”

I nodded as he released me. Following his lead, I took Archer under the arm and we moved back towards the door leading to The Subversive bunker.

THERE WERE MINOR
injuries— a few bullet grazes, a couple shallow knife wounds and Archer had a concussion—but overall we had been very fortunate. The reconnaissance mission hadn’t been a complete waste. The access to The Sanctuary was definitely not on the premises, but Archer’s team had found a surprise stash of Sanctuary-grade weaponry in the warehouse. Technology that advanced had definitely not come from Tartarus. There was a surplus of heat-seeking guns, titanium knives, motion sensor bombs and lightweight body armor. While we didn’t find the entrance to The Sanctuary, we did find proof that someone was smuggling weapons out to the Ravagers. And if there was a way to get weapons out, then there was a way to get in.

Once we were back inside I avoided everyone. I helped get Archer to Doc Porters and then slipped out during the chaos. I felt Triven’s eyes on me as I left, but I didn’t stop. I couldn’t even bear to find Mouse, to tell her I was okay, because I wasn’t. I couldn’t look at her innocent face after what I had done. Not yet anyway.

There was still blood on my hands. Some of it was my own, but the rest was a morbid reminder of what I had just done. I practically ran to the shower room, eager to wash the evidence from my skin, to shed my tainted clothing and hide behind the locked door.

I stood in the shower until it turned cold and even then I couldn’t shake the sickness rolling through my stomach. I had scrubbed at my hands until they were raw. The Taciturns’ blood had long since washed off, now only my own tinted the water as I ran the soap over my raw skin. My knuckles were bruised and split, but I continued to scrub until they burned. I had never lost control before, never forgotten who I was, but tonight I did. And it had almost cost Triven his life. The person I had leapt from a building to save, nearly died at my own hand in my blinded rage.

When I finally emerged from the shower room— with the feeling of death still on my skin— there was a figure leaning against the wall waiting for me. She was moving, slower than usual, her dark eyes still slightly unfocused. I hovered in the doorway watching her.

Archer hesitated, “Um… Triven told me what you did.”

I cringed. Waiting for her wrath. I deserved it. I had almost killed him.

“I am in your debt. Thank you for saving my life.” She couldn’t meet my eyes.

That was not what I had been expecting.

“Oh… It was nothing really.” I had saved Archer, but for the first time in my life I ended another’s out of rage, not self-defense. I felt sick again.

“Mmm, yeah… well I owe you one. And I pay my debts.” She shifted her weight uneasily. Relying on others was obviously not easy for her either. “Are you headed to the party?”

“Party?” I stared blankly at her. What could we possibly have to celebrate?

“We usually have a gathering after every recon mission. When a member dies we gather to mourn. When we all return home, we celebrate life.” Archer’s eyes lit on mine for a brief second. “This is the first time we have been able to celebrate in a while.”

I nodded, understanding her. She had come very close to being mourned tonight. Before I could refuse, she wrapped her thin hand over the crook of my elbow for support. I flinched, which made her smile. She was so much taller and more beautiful than me. While we were about the same age, I must have looked like a child next to her.

“The choice to go is yours, but if I’m being honest, I could use a hand getting there. The floor still seems to tilt at odd angles if I move my head too fast.”

I surprised myself by smiling back at her. “Lead the way.”

The celebration was being held in the dining hall. Tables had been pushed to the walls and the lights dimmed. People were gathered throughout the room. I could see other members from our mission scattered among the groups. People were clapping them on the backs, hugging them. Several residents had makeshift instruments and were playing music in the corner. Spirits seemed high. Then, someone saw us. Cheers erupted from the crowd as faces turned in our direction. Archer let go of my arm and I let her walk forward to her people. I turned to leave, but other hands found me. A few brave souls patted me on the shoulders while drawing me into the room. Most people just shared warm smiles and inclined heads as I passed.

It was a strange feeling. I was not one of them, yet they were welcoming me. Well, most of them were. Arstid stood like a porcelain statue in the back corner of the room. The bald-headed Willets was at her side.

She knew.

She knew I had lost control and almost killed one of her best soldiers. As her frosty glare held mine, a small body collided with me, tearing my attention away.

Mouse wrapped her arms around my waist, hugging me as hard as her tiny arms could. It felt good. I hugged her back, pressing my cheek to her head. I had to be better, if not for myself than for her. When she pulled away I felt a little hollow.

Mouse reached up pressing her palms to my face. Her round face was elated as she gazed at me. Then, grabbing my hand she pressed it to her cheek as she grinned.

“I missed you too.” I whispered and Mouse’s brown eyes sparkled.

She pulled me away from the crowd to the corner of the room where a man stood. His back was turned to us, but I knew how beautiful his face was. How caring his eyes were. I also knew there would be a small cut just below his right ear.

My chest tightened.

Before I could pull back, Mouse touched his hand. I expected hate in his eyes when they saw me, but instead there was something else. Relief maybe? He smiled at me before turning back to Mouse.

“Thank you for finding her.” He cupped her face. “I was beginning to think Archer had decided she wasn’t so grateful after all.”

Triven smiled warmly at me and some of the tension in my chest released. He didn’t hate me. I could feel a strange heat rising in my cheeks. I wished he would look away and then again I didn’t. Mouse bounced on the balls of her feet as her head swiveled between the two of us.

Something small, bouncy and blonde broke the awkward moment. A girl no bigger than Mouse pounced between us. Her golden ringlets fell in a striking disarray, her brilliantly blue eyes startling as she glanced up at me.

“See! I told you she would be fine.” She addressed Mouse in a high but overly loud voice. “Mouse here was worried you wouldn’t come back, but I told her she was just over-reacting. Tough girls like you always come back. I mean look at Archer.”

Her words rolled out in such a blur that it took my mind a minute to catch up. Mouse reached out, taking the bouncing blonde’s hand as she smiled at me. She had a friend. I smiled at the loud little blonde.