Marcus had reserved a room for Darrell next to his and Aleesha's. The minute
Aleesha walked into their suite, she went to the bathroom and slammed the door
behind her. Marcus’ first instinct had been to kick it down and make her talk
to him, but he forced himself to remain calm. Sighing roughly, he went to
Darrell's room and sat down in a large, overstuffed chair by the window and
looked at his boy.
"So...this thing with Jerra. Wild, huh? How are you dealing with it?"
Darrell leaned his palms on top of the dresser and stared at his reflection.
"I'on know, Marcus. I just...I'on know."
Marcus was quiet, letting Darrell gather his thoughts. Aleesha had already told
him Jerra's side of things, and after a minute, Darrell began talking and
telling Marcus his. When Darrell paused, Marcus asked him a question. "Do
you love her?"
Darrell cut his eyes at Marcus and then hissed in frustration. "Who,
Jerra? You already know the answer to that, Marcus, but..."
"But what? You not upset about Jerra giving the baby up for adoption, are
you?"
"Nah. Nah, man, I understand that."
"But you feel like she should've told you about it."
Darrell nodded slowly. "I've been there for her in every way I've known
how to be. I thought we could tell each other anything." Darrell closed
his eyes and tightened his jaw. "Man, when I saw her in that restaurant
with Giselle's father, I wanted to kill him. It took me to a place I hadn’t
gone in years. And then to find out she flew over to see him twice and came
back home like nothin' ever happened...?" Darrell turned to look at
Marcus. "What was goin' on in her head? Did she think I'd be
okay
with
that shit??"
"I think that's just it: she wasn’t thinkin', D, or at least the only
thing she was thinking about was tryin' to make contact with her daughter. I
agree she may have gone about it the wrong way, but all of us make mistakes.
You gotta forgive her."
"It's like all of this shit has hit me at once. I find out about a whole
other side of Jerra I never knew and now Roni. Man, I swear to God, if
anyone had asked me if I thought either of these two women would've done
something like this I would've bet my life the answer was 'no'. Guess I woulda
been one dead muthafucka, huh?"
"What are you gonna say to Roni?"
"I have no idea. I still can't wrap my mind around it."
"Tell me about it." Both were quiet, caught up in their own thoughts
for several moments before Marcus eyed Darrell. "So...I asked you if you
still loved your wife, and you said 'yes'. What about Roni? Do you still have
feelings for her?"
Darrell sat down on the bed and dropped his head in his hands. He opened his
mouth to answer Marcus, but just as he did, his cell phone rang. He pulled it
out and stared at the number for a second before answering.
"Hey."
"Hi," Jerra answered. "I...um...just wanted to make sure you got
there okay. You, uh, you said you would call..."
"I just made it to my room about fifteen minutes ago. I was gonna call you
after I finished talking to Marcus."
"Oh. Okay." The silence stretched uncomfortably from the states to
the Caribbean. "I'll let you go, then."
Darrell took the phone away from his ear for about three seconds, lightly
tapping it against his forehead. He wasn’t used to this awkward distance
between them where everything seemed so forced. Taking a deep breath, he put
the phone back up to his ear. "How did the day with Giselle go?"
Surprise was evident in Jerra's voice. She'd expected him to take the opening
she'd given him as an opportunity to hang up. "It was nice. No, it was
great. I really enjoyed myself and I think Giselle did too. Matter of fact,
she's here now. We decided to turn our girl's day into a sleepover. We picked
up a movie and popcorn, and a lot of junk food to munch on later."
"Good. You need that time with her. How's my li'l man?”
Jerra smiled when she remembered how excited DJ had gotten when Giselle walked
into the house. He'd immediately gone over to her and extended his arms for her
to pick him up. "He's good. He and Giselle are playing together now. He's
in heaven because now there's yet another person to spoil him rotten. But I
have to admit it's mind boggling to see how much they've bonded in so short of
time."
"That's great."
"Keisha stayed with him today, and Dom was here too when I got home. You
know they'll use any excuse to see him. I keep telling them they need to have
one themselves, but Keisha always gets that same terrified look on her face and
changes the subject. I don't know what she's so afraid of. She's a great
step-mother to Samantha and they practically have her with them all the time
anyway..."
Jerra paused to take a breath then realized she was rambling in order to avoid
broaching the reason why Darrell was in Aruba in the first place. She hated
this, hated how uncertain and insecure she felt. She was used to being in
control, the one her friends came to when they had a problem or needed advice.
But bottom line here was Darrell was her husband and they were still married.
She had every right to question him.
"When are you going to see her?"
"In the morning."
"Oh."
"So, Giselle's spending the night?"
"Mmhm."
"And Giselle's father?"
"Darrell -"
"Is he there?"
"No!"
"Never mind, just...forget it. I shouldn't have even asked you that."
"No, you shouldn’t have. Were you hoping I'd say yes in order to give you
an excuse to sleep with Roni?" Jealousy and hurt made Jerra's tone
accusing.
"Let's just end this conversation now because I can see both of us are
having issues that won't be resolved over the phone."
"How long are you staying?" Jerra asked in a rush as if afraid he
would hang up before she could get the question out.
Darrell hadn’t really thought about it. "I only plan to stay a couple of
days."
Jerra nibbled on her lip. "You only 'plan' to? What does that mean, those
plans could change? Depending on how things go, you might stay longer??"
"Jerra..."
"Never mind. You'll call me tonight?" She winced, hating how clingy
she sounded. She'd never been that type of woman, and wanted to cry when she
heard what seemed to be a slight hesitation on his part before answering.
"Yeah."
"Okay. Be careful."
"Fa' sho'. Talk to you later."
"Darrell?"
"Yeah."
"I love you."
"I love you too, Jerra."
After they hung up, Jerra tried to shake off the melancholy sadness that was
trying its best to take over her soul. She knew her husband loved her, despite
what they were going through now. She wanted to ask him if that love was
stronger than what he felt for Roni, but something stopped her just in time by
reminding her of something Darrell said yesterday:
Don't ask questions about things you don't want to know the answers
to.
Chapter
34
Early the next day, the security guard at the entrance to the gated community
found Darrell's name on the list of approved visitors for Ms. Veronica Winston.
After giving him directions on how to get to her residence, he waved Darrell
through.
The bright morning sun made a perfect backdrop for the luxury mansions in the
exclusive area where Roni lived. Darrell made a right turn as the guard had
directed and easily spied Roni's home. The two-story white beachfront property
was located a ways back from the others on a double lot which had to be much
sought after because of the privacy it provided. The home itself was
spectacular, sleek, and elegant - just like Roni.
After he pulled into the driveway, Darrell got out of the car and made his way
to the front door. Taking a deep breath to gather his thoughts, he'd just
raised his hand to ring the doorbell when the door swung open. And there she
was.
Darrell slowly reached up and removed his sunshades so that he could have a
clear and unobstructed view of her. He really didn’t know what he'd expected,
but she'd hardly changed - she was still breathtakingly beautiful. She looked
almost the same way she had eight years ago.
"Hello, Darrell."
Darrell waited for the anger he'd been feeling ever since he found out from
Bryan that it had been her decision to let him believe she was dead. He waited
for it to surface like a suffocating wave and suck him under, but it never
came. A host of other emotions surged up within him, but anger wasn’t one of
them. Roni opened her arms and reached for him.
Darrell took a step forward and closed the door before bending down to engulf
her in a tight embrace. His eyes were clenched shut as he inhaled her familiar
scent and felt the warmth of her body which let him know once and for all that
she was indeed still alive.
Her quiet sobs caused her slender frame to tremble from head to toe. Darrell
lifted her up until her feet left the ground and held her securely in his arms.
He found himself whispering soothing words of comfort as she continued to cry.
"It's okay, baby. It's okay."
Roni held on to him as if she never planned on letting him go. "I'm sorry.
I'm sorry. I'm sorry..." She repeated the words over and over again.
Behind closed lids, flashes of their past played out as if it were yesterday.
Darrell remembered the first time he saw her at the restaurant he worked in
when he first got to Vegas. Even then, she'd been way out of his league...but
he'd wanted her. With youthful arrogance on his side, he'd flirted shamelessly,
determined to have her. That night ended with Roni offering him a job. After
she and her friends "interviewed" him the next day for a position as
an exotic dancer in the nightclub she and Bryan owned, the chase was on.
She'd managed to elude him for another two years, but when he finally caught
her, he'd held on tight. Roni taught Darrell what love was and gave hers
unconditionally. He'd been drawn to her in a way he'd never experienced before.
The connection between them had been deep and strong on every level: sexually,
mentally, and spiritually. With her, he'd grown from a boy to a man.
When she first "died", he hadn’t wanted to continue breathing. He’d
all but gone on a suicide mission because for him, there was nothing else to
live for. He should've died many times over from the situations he put himself
in, but it seemed everyone had a guardian angel. Even him. He eventually got
his life together and returned home to run the businesses left for him in
Roni’s will. The driving force behind him to succeed had always subconsciously
been her. In the back of his mind, he'd always wanted to make her proud of him.
Sighing heavily now, he slowly lowered her to her feet. Darrell studied every
inch of her face as he gently wiped the tears from her eyes. Roni smoothed a
stray curl back into the tight bun that sat on the nape of her neck as she
studied Darrell just as closely.
She reached up and traced the high cheekbones in his face, let her finger follow
the sensuous line of his lips, smoothed his naturally arched brows with her
fingertips, ran her hands down the silky texture of his hair which had a
tendency to curl up if he didn't keep it cut low. "You are still such a
beautiful man."
Darrell broke out into a smile and shook his head. "No matter how many
times I asked you not to call me that, you never could resist, could you? Men
are not 'beautiful'. Just using the two words together is an oxymoron if I ever
heard one."
Roni laughed and lifted a delicate shoulder. "Sorry, but that's just the
way I've always thought of you."
Darrell's eyes roamed over her face again. "That's the way I've always
seen you too. I thought so from the first - and the last - moment I saw
you."
The smiles slowly left their faces as they both remembered the circumstances
surrounding that period of their lives. Roni stepped back but still held his
hands in hers, needing to touch him. "Well, I still don't think it's fair
that you've grown even more handsome while I've acquired a few more wrinkles
and gray hairs."
"You'll always be a beautiful woman, Roni. That'll never change."
They stared at each other for endless seconds before Roni turned to walk further
into the room, pulling Darrell behind her. "Are you hungry? I have cheese
and fruit to snack on or if you'd like something more substantial, I can make
us a light brunch –"