Now and Then (16 page)

“You want me?” he said slowly, the look in his eyes completely unreadable.

“Yes. I miss you. Like I’ve never missed anything else in my life. And I love you, like I have since the day we met—only more even than that. But,” she took a deep breath, “if you don’t love me back, if too much has happened and I’m not what you want for your life anymore, I also want you to know that I’ll be okay.” Eventually. Somehow. She hoped. “And I’ll always be grateful to you for making a real life possible for me.”

“Brynn, I don’t want your gratitude. That’s not—”

“I know, I know,” she assured, cutting him off again, because with every second that passed her desperation to do everything, say everything she possibly could, grew. “It’s just important to me that you know it anyway.” She bit her lip and then met his eyes. “Did you see that friend request I sent you on Facebook?”

Ford blinked, his chin pulling back. “I—I don’t use Facebook. My sister set up an account for me once, but I didn’t realize it was still out there.”

“Okay, so I guess that’s kind of a relief, because when I didn’t get a response I was a little nervous. And you don’t need to use Facebook. Heck, I never used it before. Mostly because I didn’t like the idea of there being too much information about me out there. I didn’t want Danny to be able to see who my friends were. I didn’t—well, you know. But now, I have fifty-seven friends and—” Ford checked his phone, his thumbs moving over the screen at lightning speed.

Then, from her pocket, Brynn’s phone pinged with a notification.

The phone could wait. For both of them. Placing her hand over his, she waited a beat for him to look up. And when he did, she was ready to go all in.

“I love you, Ford.
Please
give me a cha—”

“Brynn,” he said, his voice rough, urgent, like he wanted to stop her. But she wouldn’t stop until she’d given him everything. Laid herself bare.

“I trust you. I trust you with everything I am and all my hopes and dreams for our future.”

“Brynn, stop—”

She couldn’t.

“And no matter how rough things get, I’m never going to leave again. Because you’ve made it possible for me to believe. To believe in us. To believe in everything. I—”

Ford let out a growl of frustration deep enough that Brynn had to stop. He was angry, or maybe just through listening to what he wasn’t interested in hearing. Brynn’s world felt like it was falling apart as his hands raked back through his hair and just when she was sure he was about to turn and walk away—he reached for her. Held her stare as he caught her around the back of the neck and kissed her.

Oh God,
he was kissing her. Really kissing her, in that way that was hard and good and that she never wanted to end. It wasn’t goodbye. Those kisses were tender and tearful, while this kiss was…
everything.

Her fingers balled in the front of his shirt as he pulled her fully against him so she could feel him, solid and real, against her belly and breasts. His mouth moved heatedly over hers, his arm tightening around her waist and his fingers finding their way into her hair.

He slipped past her parted lips, tasting her with a flick of his tongue—and the glowing green gamma-ray butterflies were back.

Distantly, a door closed. Her back met something solid and her body began to move on instinct alone. Her knee sliding up the outside of Ford’s leg, her hands reaching for his hair, her aching breasts pressing harder into his chest.

And then with a ragged curse, Ford pulled back. Met her eyes and swore again before returning for another bruising kiss. This time when he pulled back, she was the one to close the distance. She was desperate for his heat. For another taste of the proof he wasn’t done with her.

But he caught her cheek with his big palm, stroking her face as he searched her eyes.

And then, like the sun rising after the longest night, his smile was there. A little crooked, a lot happy. Everything her heart and soul had been waiting and hoping for these long last weeks.

“Sorry, sweetheart, I just couldn’t wait another minute.”

Brynn was smiling, those pushy, too emotional tears now careening down her cheeks. “That’s a good thing, right?”

Laughing, he stroked her cheek.

“It is for me.” Then he reached into the pocket of her jeans and pulled out her phone. “Check your messages.”

Brynn stared at the device, baffled as to why he would be handing it to her.

But then he thumbed it to life, and she saw the Facebook alerts.

First, Ford Meyers had accepted her friend request.

And second—she looked up at Ford, her brow arching even as a grin pushed hard at her lips. “Facebook wants to confirm that we are ‘in a relationship.’ ”

“Are we?” he asked, leaning down to kiss the side of her neck, slow and wet. “Say yes, Brynn. Please.”

Her heartbeat accelerated as he lingered there, teasing the sensitive skin with his lips, tongue, and teeth. “Ford, you act like—oh God—like you’re trying to convince me instead of me trying to convince you.”

Another decadent scrape of his teeth and she gasped, clutching at his shoulders.

“I had every intention of trying to convince you. I had a plan and everything.” He licked at the shell of her ear.

“A plan?”

“I was going to seduce you.” His big hands ran down the sides of her body, riding the cut of her waist and then flaring at the swell of her hips, his thumbs brushing over those little sensitive bones that jutted slightly. “Wear you down any way I could. I need you to give me another chance, and I wasn’t going to play fair to get it.”

At that she pulled her head back. “
Me
give
you
another chance?”

He bowed his head to hers. “I was so angry, so scared, Brynn. And it made me so fucking stupid. You are the only woman I’ve ever loved. The only one I’ve ever completely wanted. And when I finally,
finally
had the chance to really have you—I threw it away in a fucking tantrum.”

She tried to tell him no, that he had every right to how he felt that night. That she’d lied to him. Betrayed his trust again and again. Shown him that when the chips were down, her instinct was to leave. Even if it was meant to protect him. Only her throat was too tight for words, and all she could do was press her hand over his heart and shake her head.

“Brynn, I wanted to take it back. To beg you for another chance, weeks ago. To tell you how sorry I was. But then you moved out of your apartment and I thought you’d taken the job in Boston. That maybe I should let you go.”

Oh and the way he said those last words, like he could barely choke them out. “But that changed when you realized I was still here?”

He let out a humorless laugh. “Not quite. I tried to let you move on, but every day the not-being-with-you was worse. Then last night I cracked. I couldn’t go another day without trying to win you back.”

“What were you going to do?”

Again going for his phone, he pulled up an email confirmation for a ticket to the TNT game she was scheduled to work in two nights’ time in Philadelphia. With a seat about a foot and half from where she’d be standing.

“How did you get this ticket?” No one could score this ticket.

“I told you before, I’m a resourceful guy with a lot of drive when it comes to getting what I want. And I want another shot with you. Only this time, I swear I won’t let anything come between us again. I can’t lose you, Brynn. I love you.”

And then he was kissing her again, growling against her mouth how much he loved her, how bad he’d missed her. How he’d never let her go. She was breathless, pulling at his shirt, hooking her knee around his thigh and rocking into—

Knock, knock, knock.

Brynn stilled, her eyes going wide.

The pub.

She’d completely forgotten where they were and hadn’t even realized—wait—how had they ended up in the stockroom?

Ford was grinning at her. “Lose track again?”

“How long have we been in here?” she whispered, horror mixing with her joy and somehow bubbling out of her chest as laughter.

“I have—no, wait, the Facebook notification.” Ford grabbed his phone, and then made a face. “It doesn’t matter.”

“What?” she squeaked.

But then Ford was taking her hand in his, threading their fingers together and pulling her back into his chest so he could smile down into her face.

“All that matters is this. That whatever happens, I’ll be there with you.”

And like that, it was better. She grinned and pushed to her toes so he’d kiss her. It was quick and sweet and not nearly enough, but there would be more later. When her shift was done and they were alone and the future she’d finally dared to wish for was laid out ahead of them.

Another knock sounded, and Ford swung the door open. “I should have known.”

Ava was standing there, her arms crossed, toes tapping and a smug, satisfied grin on her face. And an
apron
tied around her waist?

“Sorry—okay, not totally sorry, but the manager was getting a little twitchy. Even with me pouring on my considerable charm.” She turned to Brynn. “So do you love him?”

Brynn smiled, near bursting with the joy of it. “I do.”

“Finally, a sister!” Slender arms flung around her, and Brynn’s breath rushed out as Ava squealed, “And you already owe me big, because I just picked up your shift for you. We are going to be best friends. I can totally tell you don’t suck.”

Brynn laughed, her heart lightening more and more—until Ford pulled her back into his chest, wrapping his arms around her in a possessive hold that felt too good.

“Easy, Ava, don’t run her off before I have a chance to make it official.”

The laughter stopped and Brynn looked over her shoulder, expecting Ford to be making some silly face. Only what she saw wasn’t joking at all. Ford was staring at his little sister, dead serious.

Turning his attention back to her, his features softened. “Scared?”

Brynn searched deep within for the answer, and when she found it, she gave him the unfettered truth. “Not even a little. I love you. And I’m in.”

“Okay, guys, you both know the rules,” Ava stated, making eye contact with Ford first and then Sam—whom she winked at and gave one of those not-so-subtle smiles Ford still hadn’t gotten used to. “This is going to be a clean competition. Shoving, cursing at, or sabotaging your opponent are grounds for immediate disqualification. Your supplies have been checked by Brynn and myself, your bragging rights are on the line, so are you ready?”

Sam was bouncing from foot to foot, nodding vigorously. “Yes. Start,
please.
”

And shi—
shoot,
Ford couldn’t agree more. “Let’s go, let’s
go.
”

Brynn, sporting a very sexy Hibachi Cannonball T-shirt, let out a soft chuckle from her Lay-Z-Boy, the one piece of furniture she’d brought with her when she moved into his place two and a half years ago. “You got this, sweetie.”

She was grinning at him, her eyes sparkling with amusement. Gone were the shadows that had haunted their Irish depths for so long.

For two years, Danny had stayed out of trouble. O’Shea had kept up his end of the agreement, keeping the man employed and earning an honest wage. And with the temptation removed, the only path in front of him one that ran straight and narrow, Danny Ahearne had found some peace in his life. A year after Brynn had become Ford’s wife in a halftime ceremony conducted center court in the United Center, Danny had shown up at their door with a check to begin paying his daughter back the money he’d taken from her. He’d apologized quietly, without excuses and without expectation. When it was done, he’d invited the two of them to come up to Milwaukee for dinner the following week, if they were interested.

They’d been driving up once a month after that until one Saturday the phone rang. It was Brynn’s mom telling them Danny had suffered a heart attack in his sleep. He was gone.

Brynn cried herself to sleep in Ford’s arms that night, devastated but grateful for the pain that was so much worse because of how far she and her father had come in rebuilding their relationship. A few months later, O’Shea attracted the attention of the wrong people and found himself brought up on charges of racketeering. He wasn’t expected to see the outside of a cell again for a very long time.

The morning the report came out, they’d been reading the news over a microwave burrito. When Ford asked if she was relieved, she’d thought briefly and then answered, “I’m glad he got what he deserved, but I stopped worrying about Timothy a long time ago. Even if he’d tried to get back in our lives, we’d have handled it together.”

Christ, he loved her.

“Good luck,” she said then, pulling him back to competition at hand.

Ava pointed her finger at her husband and gave him a stern look. “Don’t let us down.”

Sam’s look was more pleading.
“Start already.”

“Get ready…”

Ford and Sam both got down on one knee.

“Get set…”

Ford tenderly laid four-month-old Gracie Jordan Meyers down on her Bulls-embroidered changing pad, giving her sweet baby belly a rub with the back of his knuckle. She was so soft. So sweet. So much her mommy’s little girl, sometimes he couldn’t look at her without getting that too full feeling in his chest he’d learned about with Brynn.

Gracie’s legs kicked in the air.

And good God, his precious daughter
stank.

“We got this, Gracie girl. You and me.”

Cutting a look at his competition, he saw Sam had the Y-chromosome portion of his brood, five-month-old Benjamin Meyers Farrow, ready to go. Only Benjamin was working this little reverse donkey kick he’d picked up in the last few weeks. That move pretty well evened out the one-month advantage and the BOGO baby status Sam had on him.

With a final word—“Change!”—the competition was on and the diapers were coming off.

Ford reached into the inside right pocket of Gracie’s diaper bag and grabbed her plushy basketball, being sure to fake her out at least twice before letting those chubby little swinging hands of hers get ahold of the toy she wouldn’t give up for the next hour.

Sam’s arm swirled around within the depths of his diaper bag, earning a tapping toe from Ava, who had Ben’s twin, little Hazel Elizabeth, snuffling softly on her shoulder.

Next thing the bag was upended, the contents strewn around the hardwood in front of him. But Sam had what he needed: the universal remote was tight within Benjamin’s grip, one thick end getting mauled by his toothless mouth.

Ford had Gracie’s feet snared.

Sam layered his fresh diaper beneath his son.

It was a four-baby-wipe job for Gracie and nine for Ben.

“Sam, your a-a-ahhh—your
bum
is so mine,” Ford gloated. Because no way was he losing when he was already securing his rolled-up dirty diaper.

“You wish, Meyers,” Sam sang in a gentle voice that made Ben offer him a lick of the remote.

Sam dodged it, with a quick “no thank you” to his son. Then he was muttering something about the tab sticking to itself and giving in to a quiet “Mother
Trucker.
”

The first tab on Gracie’s diaper was secure. Ford was about to score when her wriggling body stilled, her face went red, and then—Ford sighed, reaching for yet another diaper as Sam hoisted Ben up with him and took a slow motion victory lap around the living room, maneuvering his son’s pudgy arm in baby fist pumps. Sam leaned down for a longer-than-strictly-necessary kiss from his adoring wife, and Ford finished up, while Brynn promised she still loved him anyway.

It was a good day.

A few minutes later Maggie strolled in behind a racing Penelope, while Tyler—a guy who never seemed to stop smiling—brought up the rear, carrying a diaper bag, a purple glitter rolling bag with a few stuffed animal limbs poking out, and a pink miniature baby-doll high chair with a stuffed pig strapped into the seat.

“No way,” Maggie pouted. “We didn’t miss it, did we?”

Brynn pushed up on her toes and pulled Ford down for a conciliatory kiss on the cheek that went miles toward soothing his bruised ego. “Ford relinquished his title as the fastest diaper change in the Midwest just a few moments ago. Sam’s celebrating with some rice cereal for the twins in the kitchen. I’m sure he’d be happy to give you the highlights.”

The Wells family headed back for the blow-by-blow, while Brynn dropped onto the couch beside Ford, tucking herself beneath his free arm and smiling at their sleepy daughter.

It still astounded him how much love his arms could hold.

“Happy?” he asked her. He knew the answer already. He saw it in her eyes and her smile every day, felt it in the way she touched him, heard it in the sound of her voice. But he could never get enough of her answer.

Brynn burrowed her nose in his shirt and drew a long breath before pressing her hand to his heart. “Like I never dreamed I could be.”

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Now and Then
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