Read On the Outside Looking In (Wrong Reasons) Online
Authors: JL Paul
Dropping my bag on the kitchen table, I removed my jacket, hanging it over a kitchen chair, and reached for the kettle. Before I filled it, I walked into the living room at the front of the apartment, an idea occurring to me. Without turning on a light, I moved the curtain aside just enough to peek at the street below. Sure enough, a figure walked by the store with a familiar gait, hands tucked into the jacket pockets.
Releasing a mixture of sigh and groan, I returned to the kitchen, filling the kettle, and setting it on the stove. As I busied myself with the cocoa fixings, my mind wandered back to the strange encounter with Evan McNew. What was with this guy? Why was he bugging me so badly? And what was all this nonsense with him calling me beautiful?
The kettle whistled, breaking my thoughts into little pieces. I didn’t try to gather them as I poured the hot water into the mug. Stirring the cocoa mix, I emptied my mind of Evan. I had to prepare for my exam and I didn’t need thoughts of that irritating man taking up space.
I carried my mug into the living room, my shoulders relaxing. I loved my little apartment. It was convenient to work and to school, but it also had become my haven.
After I’d moved in, my mother paid me a visit to help decorate. She stayed for a week, scouring department stores and thrift shops until she found exactly what she thought would work best. I was skeptical at first – she’d decorated the family home and it was so stuffy and formal, it was hard to get comfortable. But for my little place, she’d found the cutest, retro furniture for the living room, including a squishy chair that I had placed in front of the huge window that overlooked the street.
The bedroom was more modern. She painted the walls pale blue and hung curtains just a shade darker. The bedspread was a plaid pattern with blues, greens, and purples. The dresser was long and made of oak with a vintage mirror attached.
The bathroom she left off white, with a cranberry curtain and accessories.
For the kitchen, which was small and cozy, she found a square, mahogany table with matching chairs. She purchased yellow cushions for the chairs and yellow placemats for the table. The window over the sink was covered with mini-blinds, a yellow valance above it.
Sinking to the chair by the window, I reached for the remote on the coffee table and turned on the television. I still needed to study but decided to relax with some mindless television before cracking the books. Sipping my hot chocolate, I turned on reruns of one of my favorite old sitcoms and settled back for thirty minutes of entertainment.
In the middle of the show, my cell phone buzzed. Setting down my mug, I got up to retrieve it from the kitchen table.
I had a text message from Bailey.
Get over to my place now. It’s important!
My heart shot to my throat as worry gnawed at my soul. I quickly sent a text back, telling Bailey I was on my way before putting on my shoes, grabbing my purse and jacket, and bolting out the door.
Chapter Three
I raced through the empty streets, my speedometer hovering around the speeding mark, my mind a whir. Had something happened? Was someone hurt? My thoughts drifted back to that night last winter when Irelyn had fallen down the stairs…
No, if someone had been hurt, Bailey would have called instead of texted. That thought settled my heart a little but didn’t stop other things from swirling in my head. Perhaps Bailey and Collin had broken up, or Irelyn and Lucas. It was hard to imagine that as both couples were clearly in love and very happy, but you never knew.
Or maybe Spencer and Jessica had split up. My heart lifted to the ceiling. Maybe Spencer was drunk and upset at Bailey’s place, inconsolable and he wanted to talk to me. After all, when he and Bailey had broken up for the last time, I had been the person that he’d turned to. He’d cried on my shoulders a few times, trusting me with his emotions. Maybe he needed that again. Maybe he didn’t want to fall apart in front of his cousins and their girlfriends. Maybe he wanted a little privacy with me to unload.
I applied slight pressure to the gas pedal, not wanting to rise too much over the speed limit and risk a ticket, but really wanting to reach Bailey’s house. My worries had turned to curiosity and, although I fought it, hope. I didn’t want Spencer to be in pain but I didn’t want him to be with Jessica, either.
Finally, I reached the little two flat where Bailey lived with Collin. Parking in the street, I scrambled out of the car and up to the porch, pounding on the door. Several cars were in the drive, making my hopes grow. If Spencer and Jessica had indeed broken up, then Spencer wouldn’t want to show any emotion in front of a huge crowd.
“Morg!”
Bailey greeted as she opened the door. Pulling me into a quick hug, she shuffled me inside, helping me out of my coat. She tossed my coat onto a chair and led me into the kitchen where a small crowd had gathered – including Spencer and Jessica. My heart shattered at my feet when my eyes fell on their joined hands.
“What’s going on?” I asked, ripping my gaze from Spencer. Not only were Bailey and Collin present, but Irelyn and Lucas, and a few people from the bar. “You had me worried.”
“Sorry, Morgan,” Irelyn said, her eyes reflecting the overhead lights, causing them to shine like the star atop a Christmas tree. “I told Bailey not to text anything that would worry you.”
Bailey shrugged as she took her spot beside Collin.
“Well, someone tell me what’s going on?” I asked. My voice was a bit high, probably a combination of worry and disappointment. And, if I was being honest, anger.
Irelyn looked at Lucas sitting beside her, a smile fighting to break free and take over her face. She returned her gaze to me.
“They got signed,” she said in a rush, her face alight with pleasure. “That indie company signed Out Back.”
It took a second for the news to sink into my head before my heart wiggled and I smiled a genuine smile. “Wow! That’s great!”
I hugged Collin, who was closest, before making my way to Lucas and finally to Spencer. His hug was a bit quicker because the cologne he was wearing did weird things to my body. And Jessica was shooting daggers at me.
“Wow,” I repeated. “I am so proud of you guys! When did you find out?”
“This morning,” Spencer said, a grin so wide it nearly stretched between his ears. “We had a breakfast meeting with James Argen, the founder of Argen Records. He offered us a contract – we haven’t actually signed it yet.”
My smile slipped a bit but I sucked it up. So what if they hadn’t told me right away. I wasn’t as close to them as I used to be but that was starting to change. “Have you had an attorney look at it?”
Jessica released an exasperated sigh. “They don’t need an attorney. They’re not stupid. They know all about this stuff – they’ve been doing this for a long time.”
I bit my bottom lip. Usually, Jessica veiled her dislike for me better, especially around everyone else.
“Jess, we know a bit about music, but not the legal stuff,” Spencer said in a stiff tone.
Lucas shot a disgusted look at Jessica before turning to me with a wink. “We’re meeting with an attorney on Monday.”
My smile returned. “Good. I hope it all works out for you.”
“Me, too,” Collin said, tipping a beer bottle to his lips. “We’re celebrating anyway, even though nothing’s official yet.”
“Yep,” Bailey said, opening the fridge. “How about a drink, Morg?”
I paused for a second, contemplating her offer. I still had to drive home but decided that one drink would be fine. After that, I’d switch to water.
“Sure,” I said. “What do you have?”
“I have a great red wine,” Bailey said, producing a bottle.
“Um, pinot noir. Interested?”
“Okay.”
Bailey fetched a wine glass from the cabinet and filled it with dark red liquid. She handed it to me and then retrieved a water bottle for herself.
“You’re not having a drink?” I asked. Out of the three of us, Bailey was the one who could handle alcohol the best.
“Nah,” she said with a quick glance in Collin’s direction. “I’ve decided to take a break from drinking for a bit.”
I sensed something going on between the two of them. Last summer, Bailey’s drinking had increased greatly and perhaps it had become a subject of tension between them. Maybe she was trying to quit for Collin.
“Well,” I said, raising my glass into the air. “Congratulations, guys. You deserve it!”
Everyone followed suit, even Jessica, and toasted the band.
The little partied carried on and I stayed, all thoughts of studying fleeing my brain. Besides, I didn’t have to work on Sunday so I had plenty of time to hit the books. It was just too nice being with my friends again.
Irelyn wandered out of the kitchen and I followed, still wondering what was going on with Bailey. I waited on the sofa while Irelyn was in the bathroom, preparing to pounce the second she walked out. I didn’t have to wait long.
“Morgan,” Irelyn said. “Is something wrong?”
She sat next to me, her eyes probing mine.
“Is there something wrong with Bailey and Collin?” I asked, lowering my voice.
Irelyn’s brows crunched together as she leaned forward, peering into the kitchen. Collin and Bailey weren’t in sight but that didn’t stop her from looking.
“No, why?” she asked.
“I was just wondering,” I said carefully. “You know, she said she quit drinking. I just wondered if they’d had issues with her drinking.”
“Oh,” Irelyn said, her mouth a perfect O. “Well, something like that. She was drinking a lot for a while there. But she decided to chill on the drinking. It makes Collin happy.”
I nodded, relieved. Irelyn stood with a smile, offering me a hand. I took it and got to my feet, returning to the kitchen with her.
Around midnight, I made my excuses and left, even though the party was going strong. My body couldn’t keep up as I’d gotten up early that morning to work. As soon as I got home, I shed my clothes in favor of pajamas and climbed into bed, a happy smile still on my face.
***
Even though I didn’t have to work Sunday morning, I still entered the coffee shop but this time, stood in line behind everyone else.
“Hey, Morgan,” Jill, the girl working the counter, greeted.
“Can’t stay away, huh?”
“No,” I smiled. “I had a late night last night and now I need to study. I need a little caffeine to wake my brain.”
“What are you having?” she asked.
I ordered a mocha latte, which she called over her shoulder, and chatted while I waited for Molly to make it.
“You had a late night, huh?” Jill asked after taking another order.
“Yeah, just hanging out with friends,” I said.
“Nothing too exciting.”
“Beats what I did,” Jill frowned. “I had to attend my grandfather’s birthday party. It didn’t run late but after spending all evening with my family, I was worn out.”
I laughed just as Molly placed my drink on the counter.
“Thanks,” I said, turning to find an empty booth so I could sit with the newspaper. I wanted to relax before spending the rest of the morning studying.
As I flipped through the pages, scanning the local news, customers streamed in and out at a slovenly pace, enjoying a cool but sunny Sunday morning.
Sipping my coffee, I was suddenly aware of a presence standing near my table. Before I even lifted my head, I knew who it was.
“Can I help you?” I asked.
He chuckled as he sat across from me. “I thought you weren’t working.”
Sighing, I folded up the paper and looked into his eyes. “No, I was trying to relax before I started studying.”
“Didn’t you study enough last night?” Evan pouted, his lower lip jutting out.
“I ended up going to my friend’s house, if you must know.”
He nodded, turning his head. “I thought you didn’t want to hang out because you had to study.”
“Don’t play the injured party with me,” I said, toying with my cup. “Bailey texted me and I thought something was wrong.”
“Was there?” he asked, lifting a brow.
“No. They just wanted me to come over to celebrate. Out Back was offered a contract.”
He cracked a grin. “Yeah, I heard. Rusty told me.”
“Well,” I said with a shrug, a tad disappointed that he’d taken the wind from my sail. “I went over to celebrate with them.”
“Good,” he said. “I’m glad you got out and didn’t sit alone with a pile of books all night.”
I leaned over the table, anger beginning to stir. “What are you, my social guardian?”
He laughed at that. “Sure, I could fill that position.”
“I don’t want you to.”
He shrugged, unconcerned. “I like you, Morgan. I think you’re full of fire.”
“I’m not full of fire,” I said as heat scorched my cheeks.
“Whatever you say,” he said, his nonchalance irritating the hell out of me. “So, do you want to hang out today?”
“I just told you that I had to study.”
“So? You said you had to study last night but you ended up with your friends, instead.”
“Yes, but now I really need to study,” I insisted as I drained my cup and got to my feet. “Look, I appreciate your offer and I think it’s sweet that you’re so nice to me, but I don’t want to hang out today.”
“How about tomorrow?”
Groaning, I picked up my paper and my empty cup. “I have to go.”
“Hang on,” he said, jumping to his feet. He produced a cell phone from the pocket of his leather jacket. “I’ll give you my number and you can give me a call when you want to hang out.”
I stared at him, incredulous. He was never going to give up. With a sigh, I set the paper and the cup on the table in order to retrieve my phone. “Fine, give me your number.”
As he gave it to me, I entered it into my phone. When I finished, I tucked the phone into my pocket and picked up my things again. “Thank you. I’ll give you a call.”
“Hey, aren’t you going to give me your number?” he asked.
“No,” I said, brushing past him. I tossed my empty cup into the trash, turning back one last time, smiling. “When I call you, you’ll get my number.”
I pushed through the doors without another word.
As I walked around the building, I contemplated the new number in my phone. I didn’t think I’d ever call him, but it was hard to say. He was persistent.
But why? He was so attractive and that girl, Manda, was very pretty. What would he want with someone like me?
I paused, my foot on the top step.
Maybe it was a trick. Maybe he was a friend of Owen’s, the puke that owned the Tail Feather Club. He’d had a thing for Irelyn and Bailey ever since he met them. Me, like an idiot, dated him briefly, but for a stupid reason. I knew Owen only took me out in order to get Bailey and Irelyn’s attention, but I’d only gone out with him to get Spencer’s attention. At the time it had seemed to be a win-win situation.
But Owen figured that any girl who went out with him owed him something. So many times I’d had to fight him off, slap his hands away from places where they hadn’t needed to be. And so many times had he called me a tease or worse. Yes, Bailey had done me a favor that night months ago when she’d set me up, arranged for me to see Owen trying to get her to sleep with him. I’d known in the back of my mind that Owen wasn’t into monogamy, but I was still humiliated and embarrassed.
“That’s over,” I said as I mounted the stairs and took them to my apartment. It was over and I’d pretty much gotten over it. But it didn’t make me a fool. I wasn’t about to fall for that sort of thing again. If Evan was that determined to date me, maybe someone put him up to it. But who?
Maybe Irelyn or Bailey, in an effort to find me a boyfriend so I could get over Spencer.
Or Jessica. Maybe she wanted to make a fool out of me in front of Spencer.
“Stop it, Morgan,” I chided as I retrieved my bag from the kitchen table and carried it to the living room. “Nobody is out to get you. Just relax.”