On the Outside Looking In (Wrong Reasons) (5 page)

“Something wrong?” he asked.  Even though he was walking behind me, I just knew he was smiling.

“No.”

“Didn’t like the service?” he asked.  “You were a little rude to our server.”

“No, I wasn’t,” I said as I pushed through the door and a gush of wind swept my face.

“Okay,” he said, clearly amused.

I rushed to my car, Evan on my heels.  As soon as I reached it, I opened the door, longing for the warmth.

“Well, thank you for dinner,” I said, turning to him with a forced smile, eager to end the evening.

“Hey, no problem,” he said, arms wide open.  “It was fun.  Let’s do it again soon.”

I nodded as I climbed into my car.  “I need to get home. 
Got that early class tomorrow.”

“Have a good one,” he said as I shut my door and started the engine.  He stood on the sidewalk, watching as I pulled away.

“Geez,” I said, cranking the heat.  I no sooner turned the corner than my cell phone rang.  “Oh, not already!”

Digging in my purse with my eyes on the road, my fingers brushed against the phone, clenching it and pulling it from the depths.

“Hello?” I answered, preparing for another dose of Evan.  I was off, though.

“Hello, darling,” my mother cooed.

Taking a deep breath, I switched lanes in the light traffic.

“Hi, Mother.  How are you?”

“Oh, just fine,” she said.  “Are you busy?  I’m always afraid to call as I don’t have your schedule.”

“No, I’m fine,” I said.  “I’m driving home, actually.”

“Do you have class this late?”

“No, I was just having dinner.”

I should have lied because my words instantly perked her interest.  “With whom?”

“Just a friend.”

“A male friend?” she asked.

I considered lying this time but chose not to do that.  It was ingrained in my head to not lie to my parents.  “Yes, a male friend.”

“What’s he like?” she asked.  “Does he attend University with you?”

My mother was the only person I knew that called going to college ‘attending University.’  “No, he does not go to Dunne-Browling.”

“Oh,” she said, slightly crestfallen.  “Does he attend the nearby medical school?”

“No, Mother, he doesn’t.  He graduated from a technical school and works at a garage.”

“Oh,” she said, again, this time stretching out the word.  “I see.  Well, good thing he is just a friend.  You don’t need to date someone like that.”

Of course not.
  What she didn’t say is that I needed to date someone who was wealthy and smart.

“Well, I’m not dating him.  Like I said, we’re just friends,” I said.  “So, is anything wrong at home?”

“No, dear, everything is fine,” she said.  “I was just calling about Thanksgiving.  You will be home, right?”

“Thanksgiving is a month away,” I reminded her.

“Yes, but it does take preparation,” she said.

“I will be home,” I said.  “Mid-terms will be over by then, but I’ll have to do some studying for finals as they’ll be in December.  I don’t think I’ll be home for my entire Thanksgiving break.”

“You worry too much about school,” she said.  “You’ll do fine.”

Rolling my eyes, I ignored her comment.  My mother didn’t set much by women attaining degrees, thinking they should attain husbands instead.

“I’ll call you next month to give you the exact date when I’ll be home.”

“Okay, darling,” Mother said.  “That will be wonderful.  Most of the family will be here so I’d like everything to be perfect.”

“I’m sure it will be,” I said as I neared the coffee shop.  “Mother, I’m just getting home now.  I’ll give you a call soon, okay?  I need to get inside.”

“Have a good night, dear.  We’ll speak again, soon.”

Ending the call, I grabbed my purse and left the car.  Once I got inside and shed my coat, I sank into the comfy chair by the window, closing my eyes.

Chapter Five

As Halloween approached, falling on a Friday this year, the mood around campus soared.  Most people were anticipating great parties and a fun weekend.  In every one of my classes, I had to endure girls discussing the sexy costumes they’d be wearing or guys describing the alcohol that would be at various frat parties.

I had no plans.  I had to work Saturday morning so I had no intention of going to any of the few parties in which I’d been invited.  I was sure that I wouldn’t be missed as the invitations had come more from politeness than eagerness for me to attend.

Thursday night, I took a shift at Beans for one of the girls who needed the evening off to help decorate her sorority house for their bash.  I didn’t mind as I was caught up on coursework and wanted the extra spending money for the upcoming holidays.

As my shift was ending, I walked around the sitting area, wiping down tables, glancing out the tall windows at the darkness enveloping the city.

I hadn’t heard much from Irelyn and Bailey since the night at Bailey’s house.  Irelyn called me twice with updates and I’d spotted Bailey across campus several times, but we were both headed in different directions and hadn’t had time to chat.

Loneliness crept into my heart, especially as the days grew shorter and the temperature dropped.  I spent more and more time in my apartment, watching reruns of old sitcoms and studying on my laptop.  Even Evan hadn’t come in or called.

With a sigh, I swiped the rag across the last table before turning toward the counter to clean the prep area.  It was nearly closing time and I just wanted to go home and soak in the tub with a cup of hot chocolate or a glass of wine.

The bell above the door jingled, raising my ire.  It was time to go home, not serve more coffee.

“Not closed yet, huh?”

I fought a smile as I turned.  “Almost.”

“Can a guy still get a cup?” Evan asked, grinning.

“Just good old plain coffee,” I said as I walked around the counter.  “Everything else is shut down.”

“No problem.  I’m a good old plain coffee kind of guy.”

“Sure you are,” I said as I poured him the last of the coffee.  “That’s the bottom of the pot so I’m not sure how great it will be.”

“Coffee’s coffee when it’s this chilly,” he said, dumping a packet of sugar in the cup.  “I’m not too picky.”

Nodding, I set the empty pot into the sink of sudsy water.  “What are you doing here so late?”

“I wanted a cup of coffee and this is the best in town.”

“No, it’s not,” I snorted.

“Whatever you say,” he said with a shrug.  “So, what are you doing this weekend?”

“Nothing,” I said, too quickly.  Avoiding his eyes, I began scrubbing the pot, taking my time.

“Aren’t you going to Rusty’s Halloween party tomorrow night?” he asked.  “I’m sure your friends will be there.”

“Oh, I don’t think so,” I said, confident.  “I’ve spoken to Irelyn a few times and she didn’t mention it.”

“
Hm,” he said.

Lifting my eyes, I frowned.  “What?”

“Nothing,” he said, leaning against the counter.  “It’s just that, I’m bartending tomorrow and Out Back is supposed to play.”

“But,” I said, rinsing the pot and setting it on a towel to dry.  “I spoke to Irelyn last week and she said that the guys were signing a contract with that indie label.”

“Yeah, that’s what I heard, too,” Evan said.  “But they’d already signed a contract to play this weekend and a few others so they have to honor it.”

My heart sank.  How could my friends forget to tell me that? Or, did they not forget but just didn’t want to tell me?  Maybe they didn’t consider me as close a friend as they once had.

“So, anyway, if you’re not doing anything, why don’t you come to Rusty’s?”

I shook my head, my heart aching a bit.  How could I show up?  What would I do, go sit with Irelyn and Bailey?

“Come on,” he wheedled.  “You can sit at the bar near me and keep me company.”

“Won’t you be busy?” I asked, imagining the crowd that was sure to be there for the party and to listen to the band.

“Swamped, most likely, but if you’re sitting at the bar, it will be more bearable,” he said with a wink.  He actually winked!  I didn’t think guys did that sort of thing – thought only creepy old men did it.

“I don’t know,” I said, nibbling my lip.  Maybe I would go and totally ignore Irelyn and Bailey.  I could show them that I had other friends and my own life –
that I didn’t need to be a part of theirs.

“I’ll reserve you a seat and you can have all the free diet soda that you can drink,” Evan said, leaning over the counter to flash that crooked smile.  “Come on, be a sport.”

“A sport?” I asked.  “I’m not a ten year old boy.”

He laughed, hard.  “That’s funny.”

Rolling my eyes, I dried my hands on a towel and surveyed the prep area.  I’d done most of the cleaning already and only had a few things to wash.  “Thanks.  I’m a closet comedian.”

“So, are you coming tomorrow night or what?” he asked.

Stalling, I narrowed my eyes.  “Where have you been lately?  I haven’t seen you lurking around the library or in here for a while.”

His smile widened.  “You missed me!”

“I most certainly did not,” I said, moving away from the counter to collect utensils to wash.  “I actually thought that maybe you’d given up on whatever weird sort of relationship you’re trying to establish with me.  I was relieved.”

“You are such a liar,” he said, still smiling.  “I’ve been busy with the garage and stuff.  That’s all.”

“Be mysterious,” I said.

“Chicks like that,” he said.  “So, I’ll save you a seat at the bar tomorrow night.”

“Go right ahead,” I said.

“And I’ll see you tomorrow.”

“Maybe,” I said.

“Ah, mysterious,” he said with a faux frown.  “Dudes like that.”

“I’m sure they do,” I said with a sigh.  “I don’t know if I’ll be there or not, but I’ll try.”

“Excellent,” he grinned, crumpling his cup and shooting it at the trash can behind the counter.  “See you, Morgan.”

He sauntered out of the shop as if he’d just scored a million dollar real estate deal, or something to that effect.  I fought another smile as the doors closed behind him.

***

I contemplated Evan’s offer all morning in class on Friday, not sure what I was going to do.  When I sat down with my lunch at a table in the cafeteria, I was still undecided.  I was sure that it would a costume sort of affair as I recalled that being the case last year.  I didn’t want to dress up even though I usually enjoyed doing that sort of thing.  This year, I just wasn’t into it.

“Hey, Morg.”

Lifting my head, I was surprised to see Bailey dropping into the chair across from me.

“Hi,” I said, stirring my chili with a plastic spoon.  “What’s going on?”

“Nothing much,” she said.  “You going to Rusty’s tonight?”

Furrowing my brow, I watched as she opened a bottle of water and took a long swig.

“Um, I’m not sure.  I was just thinking about it,” I admitted.

“Did Irelyn tell you what she wants to dress up as?” she asked.

“No,” I said.  “The last time I spoke to Irelyn, she didn’t even mention the Halloween party.”

“Oh, hell,” Bailey said, running a hand through her hair.  “Damn.  I’m sorry, Morgan.  I forgot.  I was supposed to ask you if you were going.”

“Huh?” I said.

“Yeah,” Bailey said.  “Irelyn has been working extra shifts to help cover the bills when Lucas is recording.  I stopped in the diner the other day and she reminded me to ask you when I saw you on campus.”

“Oh,” I said, nibbling my lip. “When do they start?”

“Next week,” Bailey said, dropping her eyes to the table.  “They’ll get a couple weeks in the studio but who knows how long the sessions will take.  Collin said that some days they could be there for twelve hours or more but other days they might only be there in the mornings.”

“That’s rough,” I said.

“It’s rough for Lucas and Irelyn especially,” Bailey said.  “Lucas is going to have to take some time off of work.  And this isn’t a sure thing.  I mean, what if the record doesn’t sell?”

I didn’t answer – didn’t think Bailey really wanted one.

“Collin isn’t thrilled with missing work, either,” Bailey said, opening a packet of ranch dressing to dribble on her salad.  “I mean, we’ll be okay – my dad pays me well for doing work at home.  But Collin is getting all macho, thinking he should be making more money.  You know what he’s like.”

“But, if the record does sell, he’ll be making a lot of money.”

“Yeah,” Bailey said.  “That’s what I told him.  But he’s still worried. They all are, but I think he’s worrying the most.”

Wiping my mouth with my napkin, I felt my heart aching for my friends.  I set my napkin on the table beside my bowl and smiled.  “I’ll show up tonight, probably.  It is Halloween, after all.”

“Great,” Bailey said, shoving the salad away from her.  “We’ll see you there.”

“Aren’t you going to eat?” I asked.

Bailey scrunched up her nose at the salad drenched in ranch. 
“Nah.  I had a big breakfast and I’m really not that hungry.  I should go – I need to talk to my math prof before class.  See you tonight.”

I watched her leave, worrying etching my face.

***

After my abbreviated shift at Beans, I hurried upstairs to get ready for Rusty’s, keeping with my original decision to not dress up.  I didn’t have time to throw a costume together, anyway.  I showered, dried my hair, and then dressed in my usual skinny jeans, a white
cami with a taupe sweater and brown, leather boots.

Grabbing my purse and keys, I hurried out the door.

Rusty’s was packed, just as I suspected it would be.  I had to drive through the parking lot several times until someone finally left and I was able to grab that spot.

Taking several deep breaths, I entered, elbowing my way through the crowd toward the bar.  Even though I hardly had a date with Evan, I still felt obligated to let him know that I would be sitting with my friends.  And, if I was being totally honest with myself, I didn’t want Spencer to see me hanging out with Evan and think that I was dating him.

“Morgan, you made it,” Evan said when I managed to snag a cramped, empty space at the bar. He grinned as he shoved a glass under the tap, filling it with amber liquid.  Before it could pour over the sides, he quickly switched it out for an empty one, sliding the full glass on the bar in front of a guy on my left. “I saved you a chair at the end, but you better hurry up and grab it.  I put a sign on it but these animals are liable to toss it on the floor.”

“Thanks,” I said as he filled another glass with diet soda and scooted it at me.  “Um, Bailey and Irelyn asked me to sit with them.”

“Oh,” he said, the smile slipping from his face.  Lifting his head, he glanced in the direction of the stage where Bailey and Irelyn were sitting at their usual table.  “That’s cool.  Sit with your friends.  I’ll pop over and see you when I get a second.”

I opened my mouth to explain, to wipe that weird expression off his face, but people were pushing in around me, shoving money at Evan as they shouted their orders.  Sighing, I took my soda to the table near the stage.

Irelyn and Bailey hadn’t noticed that I’d arrived.  They were too intent on their conversation with Jessica.  I was beginning to regret my decision to come at that moment.

“Oh, hey, Morgan,” Jessica said in a less than enthusiastic tone.

Bailey and Irelyn turned in their seats, smiling.

“I’m so glad you came,” Irelyn said, standing to reveal her costume.  She was dressed as Minnie, a fictional character in an extremely popular television show.  Her flowing, floral skirt and white sweater were usual dress for Minnie, who was very sweet and caring, as well as long, blonde hair tied back with a yellow ribbon.

The television show,
We Three
, was about three sisters who shared an apartment above the family’s pawn shop.  The girls, Molly, Minnie, and Mavis, each had a very unique personality that caused several hilarious situations both in the apartment and in the shop.  I didn’t much care for the show but just about everyone I knew loved it.

Bailey grinned as I took a seat.  She, obviously, was Molly.  On the show, Molly was the dangerous one – ready for a fight or a good man.  And Bailey looked the part.  She wore tight leather pants, a leather vest over a white blouse, and knee high black boots.  Her makeup was dark and heavy and her hair straight, lying like a silk curtain on her back.

I barely spared a glance at Jessica, knowing that she was Mavis, the smart one.  I’d already noticed the fake, dark framed glasses and the hair in a tight, neat bun.  I didn’t need to see the pressed khakis and the neat blouse.  Didn’t really want to.

“No costume?” Bailey smirked, sipping a glass of ice water.

“Nah,” I said with a forced smile.  “Wasn’t into it this year.”