Once Broken (36 page)

“How’s Jim and the kids?”

“They’re great! Everyone’s good. But we’ll talk about them later. I have no news quite as hot as the news about you and Tony. What the heck’s going on?”

Jackie related the latest details of the saga.

“Wow, in your wildest dreams did you ever imagine any of this?”

“I’ve got to admit, not
even
in my wildest dreams. Tara, he’s different. He’s finally the man I’d hoped he was so many years ago. Or maybe I’m different. When we were younger, we wondered if every guy we met was
the one
. At this stage of life, there’s no such pressure. The majority of our life’s story has been written. Now it’s easier to go with the flow.

“The one constant with Tony is that I’ve always enjoyed being with him. And after all these years, he makes me feel young again. Then, there’s the pleasure of sharing my granddaughter with him. It’s a head trip. When Gina was little, the loneliest part was not having another person who cared about her as much as I did. Of course, with Charlotte I have Gina and John to share her with. But it’s still a kick sharing her with Tony. It’s all so nice.” Jackie slipped on her reading glasses to scan the menu. “Want to split some chicken satay?”

“Sure, and pad paradise?”

“Jackie nodded in agreement and folded the menu.

“How’s Gina doing?”

“Well, she’s still resistant to Tony. I told her about at the park. She wasn’t mad. In fact, I think she was happy that she doesn’t have to make the first move. She’s thinking about things, and I’m hoping she’ll come around. In the meantime, I sneak around seeing Tony like I’m a teenager with a forbidden love. Gotta say, it’s kinda fun.” The two friends laughed.

*

A routine developed where Tony called Jackie each week on Wednesday. They shared current happenings in their lives; tidbits about Gina, John and Charlotte; and memories from long ago. As always, their conversations were effortless. Tony still could make Jackie laugh like no one else had.

In one of their conversations in early November, she said, “Hey Tony, I’ll be taking care of Charlotte all day this Saturday because it’s John’s sister’s wedding. I’ll have her at my house all day and she’s staying the night. Wanna hang with us?”

“I can’t imagine anything I’d rather do.”

November 2007

Gina dropped off Charlotte at eleven thirty. Tony arrived at noon. Jackie’s three-bedroom townhouse was well-equipped for Charlotte. A Pack ’n Play and infant toys adorned the living room, with a high chair in the dining area. A guest bedroom had become a nursery. Jackie and Tony marveled at every move and sound Charlotte made. During her afternoon nap, they relaxed in each other’s company with a cup of coffee to recharge for the remainder of the day.

When Charlotte awoke, the couple took their grandchild for a walk to the center of town. The reflection of the red and yellow trees bounced off the water along the river walk. They sat on a bench by the waterfall with Charlotte on Tony’s lap. When they returned home, Jackie prepared a simple dinner of chicken Caesar salads, garlic bread, and chardonnay. Jackie found it endearing to watch Tony engage Charlotte in her activity gym as she fixed dinner.

Gina checked in often via texts. “How’s my love bug?” Jackie responded that all was well, never mentioning her companion.

They sat down for dinner with Charlotte in her high chair beside them. Tony asked to feed her the blueberries and applesauce with baby cereal. Since Tony had no experience with babies, Jackie was amazed at how well he handled the task.

By seven thirty Charlotte was ready for bed. Her grandparents tucked her in after her last bottle and the two collapsed on the sofa for the remainder of the evening. Picking up the music control next to her, Jackie put on James Taylor’s Pandora station and clicked on the gas fireplace.

“This was an awesome day. But I’m exhausted. It’s amazing how much one kid takes out of you,” Tony said.

“She’s a lot of work. I’m so glad you were here today to share it. She’s delightful, isn’t she?”

“She sure is. It’s been such a joy spending so much time with her today. Thank you.”

Later that evening, as Tony and Jackie spooned in bed, she reviewed the day with gratitude for the comfort she felt with Tony. She was amazed at life’s unpredictability. She was happy.

*

Tony asked Jackie to come for Thanksgiving dinner on the Saturday after Thanksgiving.

“Sure. What are you doing on Thanksgiving Day?”

“I’ll take my mother out to dinner. Probably stop by Luke’s afterward for dessert. But I want to have Thanksgiving with you too. I know you’ll be at Gina’s on Thanksgiving day, so let’s have our own on Saturday.”

“Sounds wonderful. You can cook a turkey dinner yourself?”

“Absolutely. I’ve become quite self-sufficient in my single years. Also, you’ll meet Bailey.”

Jackie grinned. “I can’t wait to meet him.”

*

On Saturday evening, before Jackie could ring Tony’s doorbell, she heard Bailey’s ferocious bark announce her arrival. When Tony opened the door, Bailey was barking and tail wagging so gleefully that the rest of his body wiggled with it. As Jackie stepped into the foyer, Bailey pushed his body into her long beige cashmere coat, tail still wagging and nearly knocking her off her feet. She laughed with delight. “He’s such a love.”

“Oh geez, his fur is all over that expensive coat.”

“At least it’s the same color.” She laughed as she patted him.

“Okay Bailey, go lie down. She’s my date.” Bailey obeyed his master. His master leaned in and pressed his lips against Jackie’s.

She breathed in, as Tony took her coat. “It smells awesome in here.”

“I have a small stuffed turkey in the oven. The mashed potatoes are done. I admit I bought the squash and an apple pie. Come in and make yourself comfortable. I’ll get us some wine.”

“Let me help you.”

“I may take you up on that offer for the gravy but now everything’s under control. Let me wait on you.” In that moment, Tony reminded Jackie of Louie. Settling on the sofa, she recalled Louie and Anna’s hospitality. The bones of the house looked the same as they did ages ago. She remembered Louie and Anna playing backgammon on the back porch. She could almost see Gina and Louie playing poker for Doritos, and little Gina coming out and lifting her bag of Doritos to show her mother. She imagined Anna crocheting in her recliner. She reminisced about playing ping-pong in the basement … and being in Tony’s room. Bailey’s nudge brought her back to the present. “Oh Bailey, you’re such a love,” she whispered as she patted him. “Thanks for bringing me back from memory lane.”

Tony returned from the kitchen, handed her a glass of champagne, and placed a bowl of strawberries on the coffee table. He sat beside her on the sofa.

“It’s strange being here again with you,” Jackie said. “I didn’t realize how many memories I had repressed.”

“Maybe this wasn’t a great idea.”

“Oh no, it’s no problem. It’s just strange. So much is the same and yet everything’s different. But Bailey’s new. And, you’re a brand-new Tony, really.”

“I’m glad you see me that way. The only thing that hasn’t changed is how much I love you. I stand corrected. I love you more.” He leaned to give her a delicious kiss.

“So does Gina know about us yet?” he asked.

“No. It hasn’t come up and I don’t know how to bring it up.”

“Where does she think you are when you’re with me?”

“Oh, visiting Tara or Ellen, or out with friends from work. It doesn’t matter because she calls or texts my cell phone, which, of course, is with me wherever I am.” She waved it before him.

“True.”

“So, the ping-pong table’s still in your basement, huh?”

“Yup. Want a match after dinner?”

“I’m rusty.”

“Me too. It’ll be an even match.”

“You’re on! Your bedroom isn’t still in the basement, is it?”

“Nah, I moved to the master. I’ll show you that later.”

“Looking forward to it.”

December 2007

T
he following week, Jackie was reading
Travel & Leisure
magazine on her white, overstuffed sofa, squandering a lazy Saturday afternoon. The double knock at the door was Gina’s trademark. Laden with Charlotte and her Vera Wang baby bag, she panted as she swung open the door. “Hi Mom, I was on my way back from visiting Nana. You’re not busy are you?”

“Never too busy for you and my little love bug,” Jackie replied, clapping her hands and opening her arms wide in response to Charlotte’s pudgy open arms. “Come here, you sweet little thing!”

“She’s all yours. She’s getting so big—almost five months. Did I tell you, she weighed seventeen pounds at the last doctor’s visit? That’s a heavy bundle to lug around, you know.”

“And, such a cute one.” Jackie rubbed her nose into Charlotte’s tummy. The baby giggled.

Gina sank into the opposite side of the sofa with one leg under the other. “How about some girl talk?”

“Anytime. What’s up?” Jackie set Charlotte on her knee for a quick, silent game of pat-a-cake.

“I’ve been thinking about Tony. I do feel bad, but I’m still angry. You know whatever pain he feels is his own damned fault. He did this to himself.”

“That’s true,” her mother confirmed, softly clapping Charlotte’s hands together, enjoying her giggle.

“Then why do I feel so bad?”

Flipping Charlotte around and positioning her on the sofa, Jackie handed the baby a rattle that Charlotte put in her mouth. “Well, maybe it goes back to the fundamental question I posed before. How long should people suffer for their mistakes? Convicted criminals, by serving their sentence, are deemed to have paid their debt to society.”

“Unless you’re the victim,” Gina said.

“Very astute,” Jackie said, chuckling. “However, some victims manage to forgive the most heinous crimes. I doubt they do it for the criminal. They do it for themselves, to relinquish their own anger. Gina, you’ll never forget what Tony did, or more important, didn’t do. But the question is can you forgive him, for yourself? I once heard that hating someone is like taking a poison pill and expecting the other person to die. It’s some analogy. Forgiveness is a gift you give yourself. You know, Gina, if I didn’t think he’s changed, I’d never push for you give him a chance. But I believe he’s different. Somewhere in the past twenty-something years, he finally grew up.”

“Well, I’ve thought about this a lot and talked to John about inviting him to dinner. Okay, I’ll do it. Next Sunday?” She recoiled at the realization of the risk.

“Honey, that’s great. He’ll be thrilled. Since we’re having a girl talk, I have something to tell you.”

“Oh, what’s that?”

“Well, Tony and I have been seeing each other, believe it or not.” Jackie cringed as she waited for her daughter’s reaction.

“What? Since when? And how could you not tell me? And what the heck do you mean ‘seeing each other’?”

“Well, since we met at the park. He called that night and asked me to dinner. I went because it was so comfortable being with him. We reminisced about all the fun times we had years ago and feelings came flooding back. Dinner was even more wonderful. We talked a lot about the past and how we’ve both changed. And, I learned that he’s been lurking in the background of our lives for years. After your accident, he went to the hospital and spoke to your doctor. He stood in the back of the church when you got married.”

“Really?” Gina’s eyes glistened. “It was his own damn fault. But that’s kinda sad.”

“Agreed. Anyway, we went out on his boat another night. We had our own Thanksgiving at his house the weekend after Thanksgiving. That was wild. Imagine being back at Nana and Louie’s house? It was the same, yet different. Lonelier. But thank God, he has a lovable yellow lab named Bailey for company. It killed me not to tell you. But I wanted to let you process this on your own without any pressure from me.”

Gina’s mouth gaped. “Well, well, you
can
keep secrets from me! So, do you love him?”

“I actually do,” Jackie admitted, as much to herself as to Gina.

“Geez, it’s a good thing I came around. What would you have done, kept sneaking around like you’re the kid and I’m the mom?”

“Maybe.” She chuckled. “Give him a call. You’ll both feel better.”

*

Tony called Jackie Tuesday night. “Hey Jack, Gina just called. She invited me to dinner on Sunday.” His voice was filled with boyhood exhilaration. “You
must
have known.”

“I did, but I couldn’t spoil the surprise. It’s great, isn’t it?”

“It’s fantastic. She said to come around five thirty. We’ll have dinner and then watch the football game together.”

“It’ll be fun.”

“So, how much does she know about us? How should we act around her? I don’t want to scare her off.”

“I confessed the day she told me she was calling you. But on Sunday I’ll go over there as usual. We shouldn’t overwhelm her. We’ll meet there.”

“Sounds good. Maybe we’ll be a family. We’re still on for our standing Saturday date, right?”

“Sure. Gina asked me to babysit a while in the afternoon. But I can be ready by seven.”

“Want company babysitting? We can take Charlotte for a walk and stop by the little French bistro. We’ll make an afternoon of it and have a late dinner?”

“Wonderful. Come by around twelve thirty.”

Charlotte’s grandparents spent Saturday afternoon enthralled with her and each other.

*

Sunday afternoon, John and Charlotte watched
Curious George
while Jackie and Gina prepared dinner.

“Wow, Mom, this is surreal! We’re making dinner for Tony Salvucci.”

Chopping onions on the butcher block cutting board, Jackie agreed. “It is. I’m so proud of you, you know. It’s a big step for you. But I’m sure it’s the right one.”

“I hope so. If Charlotte falls in love with him and he deserts her, I won’t be responsible for my actions.”

“I know that.” Jackie handed the bowl of chopped onions to Gina and started chopping green and red peppers. “I remember the rage I felt when he left you. I swear I could’ve killed him with my bare hands.” She sighed. “But that was then and this is now. He’s so thrilled to be part of our lives; this time’s different Gina, I promise.”