Once We Were (21 page)

*              *              *

Ioan said nothing to Cora as she dressed for bed. He stiffly guarded the hotel window. No movement went unaccounted for. Cora watched him from the mirror as she braided her hair. “Will you stay here with me?” she asked.

“
Not tonight,” he said. “That man is still out there. If he starts with the house, you'll be safe here. He'll find me there waiting for him.”

“
Let me go with you,” she insisted. “He put my father and Mr. Luckett in the hospital. Perhaps I can speak to him. No sense in hurting anyone else.” Ioan didn't have the heart to tell her. Not on her wedding night. She deserved one more night of innocence before discovering he had not saved her father. It could wait until morning.

“
You're not leaving this room,” Ioan persisted. “Do not open any windows or doors. No one comes in.”

Cora finished her braid and tied the end, laying it over her shoulder. It was no use arguing. He was her husband now. “It's not how imagined it,” she said quietly. “Our wedding night.”

“I'm sorry, darling.”

“
You won't stay with me then? I hate being alone,” she said. “You'd rather I hug my pillow?” She propped the pillows against the headboard. Her robe slipped from her shoulders. Ioan cleared his throat to distract her from how he blushed.

“
Are you alright, Mr. Saier?” she asked smiling.

“
Sorry. I didn't know you were undressing.”

“
Mr. Saier,” she teased. “This can't be the first time you've seen a woman naked.”

“
No, ma'am, of course not.”

Cora slipped into a navy lace gown which did little to cover anything. “I should be going,” Ioan managed to get out. He kissed her forehead for a moment, which lasted an eternity. Every muscle strained against his will. Cora felt it. Her lips caressed his ear. “You can stop pretending to be a gentleman now,” she whispered. She shrieked in surprise when he swept her up and trapped her beneath him. “I will be anything you wish tonight,” he said.

It was nothing like the girls said it'd be. Boarding school attics were infested with secret fancies. After Mrs. Harker's last rounds through their rooms, the girls tiptoed to the attic, linking hands so they wouldn't trip in the dark. Beatrice informed them that lust is a deadly sin, but Cora always went. The girls swooned over new sweethearts, whether the lucky lad knew it or not, declaring true love and blissful marriage. An older girl blurted out, “I've knocked a boy before.” The girls gasped with hands over their innocent lips, but still utterly delighted.              

“
That's so wicked!” one declared.

“
What happened?”

“
He caught me in the ticket booth at the train station.”

“
You laid with William Crane?” another girl gasped.

“
He's alright, I suppose,” another commented. “Was he any good?”

“
Rough. It's not all they make it out to be,” the girl said. “But if you girls want to keep your husbands-to-be at home instead of at the gentleman’s clubs, you best follow my lead. Practice makes perfect. Don't ever appear too eager to get it. It will make you less desirable. Always remain calm and still when he's on top of you. Let him do what he must. This is a service you give to him. Don't talk too much. Don't make a sound. This will make him happy. It's all over and done with in no more than five minutes. When he finishes, let him linger there for a moment and then he will fall asleep and it will be over.”

Ioan made it difficult to think about any of that. When he held her tightly, Cora couldn't help but squeeze his shoulders. When he kissed her, she kissed him back. She bit her lip to avoid making a sound, but he made it impossible to hold her silence. It wasn't a service for him. He made it all about her. Every weak spot she tried to hide, he quickly found. Later she would jealously wonder how he learned to please a girl, but that night, she didn't care much. They were both too eager to turn out the light. Ioan threw the sheets over their heads and by the end of the night, they'd done a good job of tangling them up.

He laid beside her and they talked about everything, as if the world was still guiltless. Every trouble had gone for a moment. “You're a cruel dream, Cora. I'm never waking up again,” he said. “With your permission, I wish to give myself to you entirely, now and for the rest of our lives.”

“
It would be my honor to accept you,” she said. “Now and for all the moments like this we will share.”

Chapter 17

A girl marries so she won't know what it's like to wake up and find her man missing. She stared at Ioan's neat half of the bed. The bastard must have hightailed in the dead of night. No notes. No flowers. No honeymoon. “I don't need a honeymoon,” she tried to convince herself. “I'm his wife. Not his property.” She reminded herself that historically honeymoons were a way for a married man to take his prize far away so no man would have her. It's likely he paid little attention to romantic detail and locked her away until he was ready to enjoy her. “Not helping,” Cora sighed sadly. Her analogy made her feel more miserable. She distracted herself with people-watching from her hotel window, but couldn't shut out her regret for long. “He could've bought me a hanky, at least. That's an inexpensive present. What's a hanky worth these days? I'm sure that would have been no trouble at all.”

A light tap on the door made her heart skip. He'd came back after all. Cora hurried  to answer it. “Mr. Saier, I was just reconsidering marriage and thinking how I might like you better as a single man, but you...” She trailed off in the face of an old woman. “..surprised me?”

“
I'm sorry to bother you, miss. Housekeeping. I was instructed to allow you anything you'd like from the trolley and add it to Mr. Saier's tab.”

“
He ought to be ashamed of himself,” Cora said, gazing at the mounds of food. “Is he taking the piss out on me and calling me fat?”

“
Quite the contrary, madam.”

“
I'll just have a muffin. Children starve in African. Tell him I said so.”

“
He left this for you. He's a hard fellow to understand, but I'm sure you know what it's about,” she said, handing her an envelope. “And these.” She dropped the bouquet of lavenders in Cora's arms. “Good day, ma'am.” Cora quickly opened the envelope.

             
“My dearest Cora,

             
I apologize for leaving so suddenly. I look forward to our honeymoon together. I have made arrangements for your checkout tonight and hope you will meet me at the carnival. You may find me at Magnus the Magnificent's tent. Please use the admission ticket below.

             
With undying love,

             
Ioan Saier.”

He hadn't forgotten her. Cora loved him again. She dropped the lavenders on the bed and rushed to her closet for her evening dress.

*              *              *

Ioan stepped out of the icy air and into the warmth of the hotel. “Good evening, sir. How may I make your stay at The Artisan more comfortable?” the receptionist asked.

“
I won't be staying long,” Ioan answered. “I'd like to leave a note for my wife. She's staying in room 105.”

“
Very good, sir. Go ahead and write your message here and I will find a bellboy to deliver it to her room,” the receptionist instructed. Ioan took up the fountain pen and wrote.

             
“Mrs. Saier,

             
Forgive me. I know this is not the honeymoon you imagined. I wish I could give you better. I pray you'll remember how deeply I love you, and will join you very shortly.

             
Yours,

             
Ioan.”

“Who did you want to leave a message for?” the receptionist returned.

“
My wife,” Ioan repeated.

“
A Mr. Seldon Wensworth?”

“
Mrs. Coralie Saier.”

“
A Mr. Seldon Wensworth stays in room 105. Are you sure you haven't got the numbers mixed up?”

“
I left her in 105. I have the receipt here,” Ioan insisted. The receptionist stared at the paper. “Is there a problem, sir?” Ioan asked.

“
It appears Mrs. Saier checked out,” the receptionist glanced over his records. “Yes, only two hours ago.”

“
She checked herself out?” Ioan asked.

“
No, sir,” he replied. “Mr. Ioan Saier did. Here's his signature.”

“
I never signed this,” Ioan said.

“
Sir, you stopped by this morning and asked for your bill.”

Ioan's heart raced. “What did I look like?”

“I suppose a lot like you do now, sir.”

“
Where did she go?” Ioan demanded.

“
I don't know, sir. She took a buggy,” the receptionist said. “You left her a note. I have a copy here.”

Ioan scanned the paragraph. “Bloody bastard!” he cursed, running out the door.

Ioan was never late. It struck her odd that he invited her but hadn't showed. Cora searched the faces in the crowd, but every man present had a lady. She decided to ride back to the hotel, when an arm slipped into hers. “Good evening, signorina. I must correct myself. It's signora now, isn't it?”

Cora laughed. “This is all starting to make sense,” she said.

“
There's no need to inspire terror,” he said. “We're a happy, loving husband and wife here to see Magnus the Magnificent, remember?”

“
So you're the man who's trying to kill to me?” Cora commented. “I must admit I'm disappointed. You don't look tall at all. That suit is far too large for you. Who did you steal it from?”

“
We must not draw attention to ourselves,” he said. “You will do as I say.”

“
You're going to kidnap me in front of all these people?” Cora asked.

“
I will do just that. No one will suspect it,” he said.

“
My husband won't stop hunting you,” she said.

“
You mean that man over there?” Gianni pointed out. Ioan wandered the crowd, searching and questioning every face desperately. Cora pulled away from Gianni, but he yanked her back. “Do not move or I will burn every man, woman, and child here,” he warned. Cora spotted the belt of dynamite strapped to his waist. He flipped a lighter open to ignite his cigarette.

“
There's no need for lunacy, sir,” Cora informed him. “It is not necessary to threaten me with bombs and suicide. If you want something, we may negotiate it man to woman.”

“
You will come with me, signora, and everyone lives tonight,” Gianni said. “Are we agreed?” 

Cora glared at him, but followed. He stopped at a car parked outside. No doubt it was stolen. He opened the door for her. She gracefully sat inside and took a deep breath as he locked her inside. She was alone. She was his. He checked the crowd briefly before jumping into the driver's seat.

“I admire your bravery, Mrs. Saier. Women do not hold their silence so long. That is sometimes unfortunate,” he said.

“
Well, you did go through so much trouble to find me,” Cora answered. “Unlike you, I don't hide in the dark like a coward.”

He chuckled. “I see you're still holding a grudge about all this. Why can't we be friends?”

“You ruined my wedding,” Cora said.

“
No one would have gotten hurt if they had stayed out my way,” he said.

“
What exactly do you want from me?” she asked.

“
You offered me money in exchange for sparing your chastity and your life,” Gianni said. “You do remember? I'm here to collect my due.”

“
I can negotiate a sum once you return me to my husband.”

“
How much do you think he's willing to pay for you, Mrs. Saier?” Gianni ventured. “His estates? His fortune? Perhaps his life?”

“
I know you're suffering. I was a passenger too,” Cora said. “I've lost loved ones as well. It is a constant emptiness you fight to live with, but killing me won't bring them back. It won't change what happened on Titanic.”

Gianni laughed. “Signora, I don't know what you're talking about. I was locked away when your ship sank. Unwanted. Unloved. Without purpose. Titanic gave me purpose.”

“If you're not a passenger, then who are you?” Cora questioned.

“
A lover of justice.”

“
You intend to kill me then?”

“
I've never really killed anyone intentionally, but I don't understand why murder is so frowned upon. Everyone deserves a gravestone. No one is without blame. Nothing upsets me more than to watch the innocent suffer and the guilty get away with it. Mr. Saier will buy you back, piece by piece. I will start with a lock of hair. Once I have received payment, I will send this scarf. He'll pay again and again until he's paid for every last part of you, but he will never sleep soundly. What happens when he realizes you're never coming home? I will be long gone by then.”

The car stopped. Darkness made it impossible to measure where they were or how far they had traveled from town. Gianni stepped out. It was quiet. The breeze made Cora's skin crawled. A mixture of wet dirt and wine overpowered the air. Wherever they were, they were nowhere near New Castle. There wasn't a soul for miles. He left her no chances. Cora found it more difficult to keep her nerve.

“
Get out.” He yanked her door open. “Let go of me!” Cora cried, pulling away from him. He forced her from the car. His elbow slammed her into the dirt. Cora ignored her bleeding nose and stumbled down the road. Her dress hindered any attempt to run. Gianni gripped her sleeve. Cora smashed her foot into his knee. Her sleeve ripped from her shoulder as she staggered away. “He's going to kill me!” she screeched. “Help! Can anyone hear me?”

Gianni seized her ankle and dragged her back to the car. “Help!” she screamed louder. Gianni slapped her. Cora grabbed a rock and smashed his skull. “I'll kill you!” he roared, pressing the rock against her face. “Is that what you want? Try me again and see if I don't break you!”

He threw her onto the river bank. Cora felt cold fingers of rotting flesh touch her leg. She scrambled away. Her chest heaved with a heart that reached its limit.

“
Is that any way to greet an old friend?” Gianni asked sadly. He opened his lighter. A white decaying face popped out of darkness. Cora buried her face against her knees. She could take no more. She sobbed inconsolably as Gianni sat Beatrice down beside her. The smell cut her breath. “Look at her!” Gianni demanded. “Look at what you've done. I said look at her! Don't just look, you fool. Say something! Start with I love you. Tell her all about the things she's missed since you locked her away. I wager she has plenty to tell you.”

“
This can't be,” Cora wailed. “She died on Titanic.”

“
So you had wished. You caused her great pain.”

“
You don't know anything about it!” Cora sobbed.

“
You don't know me or her or Ioan or how I desperately wished she was with me! You know nothing but hate! You took her and murdered her! Just like you've done with me!”

“
I tried to save her!” Gianni roared. “She jumped to her death. I just thought you should know that it's on your hands. Of course, I don't blame you. What woman wouldn't steal another's happiness if she could get away with it? I just think it's a pity how she died. Buried alive. A ghost. Convinced to be dead when she stood right in front you. Do you understand what that's like? No?” He drew his knife. “You're going to know exactly what it feels like, Mrs. Saier.”