One-Click Buy: November Harlequin Presents (58 page)

‘M
ORGAN
!'
Maverick ran down the corridor towards the waiting room. ‘What happened?'

Morgan swung herself around, stress lining her features. ‘Maverick. I'm surprised to see you here.'

‘How is she? Can I see her? I have to talk to her.'

‘I'm not sure they'll let you.'

‘Is it the baby?'

She shook her head. ‘She's got food poisoning. On top of morning sickness. She was so dehydrated, she collapsed on the floor.'

‘It's my fault. She hardly ate a thing, and I was so angry with her. It's no wonder she got sick.'

‘No, if it's any consolation, I actually think it's my fault. I told her she should have something nourishing for breakfast, so I cooked her eggs. They think that's what did it. It's just lucky that her morning sickness took care of most of it.'

‘So then—the baby…?'

‘Is okay. The paramedics were fantastic. They were there in no time.'

He collapsed into a chair and put his head in his hands. ‘Thank God!'

She tucked her crutches together and sat down alongside him. ‘She thought you were angry with her.'

He squeezed his eyes tightly shut, trying to block out the pain of remembering what he'd done, what he'd said. ‘I was. Very angry.'

‘But you really love her, don't you? I mean, you must, otherwise you wouldn't be here. You wouldn't care.'

Something like a thunderbolt shuddered through him. He opened his eyes and looked at the green-grey linoleum floor. It was the same floor he'd closed his eyes on just a few short seconds ago, but somehow it looked different. Everything looked different. Brighter. Sharper.

Everything
felt
different.

Especially inside him.

He loved Tegan. Loved her with a passion that went beyond mere physical desire. Loved her with a force that couldn't have kept him away from her if it had tried.

Why hadn't he realised? Why had it taken him so long? Why had he cost her so much?

His voice was so shaky when it came, it was a wonder it didn't break. ‘I do.'

Just saying the words made it more real. More powerful. ‘I do,' he repeated, firmer this time, almost like a vow.

‘Then maybe you ought to tell her. She was pretty upset when she came home from lunch today.'

He closed his eyes again, nodding. He could imagine. He'd been relentless in his accusations, relentless in his cruelty.

Beside him Morgan sighed. ‘Just don't be surprised if she doesn't want to see you.'

And pain sliced his heart anew.

‘What do you want?'

It was the next morning before they let him in, after Morgan had convinced her to agree to see him. And her first sentence let him know just how low on the register he'd reduced himself to.

He'd spent the night thinking about everything she'd said, replaying all her defences, trying to put together the pieces of the puzzle. She'd been right. She had tried to tell him, or at least talk to him, and he'd cut off her opportunities every time.

He'd known something was up that time he'd returned from Italy and she'd been asking strange questions. She'd told him she wanted to talk. And then Nell had called and things had got messy.

He hadn't let her explain. And, in doing so, he'd driven her deeper and deeper into her duplicity.

He entered the room, feeling more out of control than he'd ever felt in his life. She lay leaning against the pillows in a white hospital gown, her hair swept back from her face, a drip feeding liquids into her arm. Her skin was pale, but her features were set to defiant, her hazel eyes and mouth resolute.

He stopped halfway into the room. ‘Tegan…' he started inadequately.

‘I had to tell the medical staff I was pregnant,' she snapped. ‘I'm sorry if that was against the rules, but don't worry, I swore them all to secrecy.'

He held his breath. He deserved that. He deserved everything she wanted to dish out and more.

‘How are you feeling?'

‘It's just the best Christmas morning I've ever had. What do you reckon?'

‘They tell me the baby is okay.'

‘What—so now you care about the baby? That's a turn-up. What did you come here for, Maverick? To have another go at me? To make me feel even worse? Because you know, if Morgan hadn't convinced me to see you, you wouldn't be here at all. So, please, just make it quick.'

‘No,' he said, moving closer to the bed. ‘I don't want to make you feel worse. I came to make sure you were all right. When I heard you'd been taken to hospital, I just about went crazy. I had to see you. I had to tell you I was sorry.' He took a step closer to the bed. ‘And only last night I realised why it mattered.'

‘Because you wanted your baby back? Sorry, it's a done deal.'

‘No. Because I only realised when I got here why it was so important I see you. Because I love you.'

For a split second she didn't react, and he held out hope that he'd said the words she most wanted to hear. But then she scoffed, holding a hand to her head. ‘Is that supposed to be a joke? Because, if you're serious, I have to say you've sure got a funny way of showing it.'

‘Tegan, I'm so sorry. For the things I said, for the way I treated you. I'm sorry for everything. I didn't realise you were so sick yesterday. I should never have got stuck into you like that at all, but while you were so sick it was inexcusable.'

‘You thought I was faking it, so everyone would know I was pregnant and you'd be forced into marrying me.'

He turned his head away, ashamed because what she'd said was true.

‘There is a reason,' he said.

‘A reason you treated me like crap?'

‘I told you about Tina.'

‘The PA who left you so scarred and cynical. She lied to you. She got pregnant. That's what you told me.'

‘She did.'

‘As did I! I lied to you about who I was. I got pregnant. Obviously I deserved the worst.'

‘It's not the same.' He took a deep breath, raked his hands through his hair. ‘I thought it was, but it's not. Tina's baby wasn't mine. She got pregnant and decided it was her meal ticket. We were working late one night and she made a move on me. She was from a Greek family, and had very striking looks…And, well, one thing led to another. A few weeks later she told me the baby was mine and that her family would disinherit her. I had no reason not to believe her. So I did the honourable thing—I told her I'd marry her.'

‘How did you find out?'

‘Just before the wedding. I overheard her boasting about it to a friend, about how she'd sucked me in completely and had already booked the abortion clinic. She was planning to destroy the child she'd used to trap me with as soon as our honeymoon was over.'

‘Oh my God. How could she?'

‘When I learned you were pregnant, it was Tina happening all over again. I was angry at you, but I was madder at myself for letting it happen. It's not an excuse. I'm not trying to claim that what happened all those years ago excuses my behaviour. But I just want you to understand why I acted the way I did, and why I jumped to the conclusions that I did—the wrong ones, I know now.'

She blinked and just stared at him, and he was brave enough to walk to her side and sit down on her bed. ‘I guess it didn't help to have it all dumped on you yesterday like that. I hadn't planned it that way. I did try to tell you before, several times. Honest.'

‘I know. I didn't give you a chance to tell me.'

She reached out a hand to his arm. ‘You really believe that?'

‘I didn't before.' He caught her hand in his, then spread his fingers wide, matching hers palm to palm before wrapping it once more in his. ‘I was too blind with anger to see anything. I wasn't thinking. I was reliving the past, and I failed to see you. I only saw Tina and what she'd planned. What she'd done. But I do believe you now. I remembered the times I cut you off. I remembered you asking me not to keep doing this to you. I remembered your frustration. And it all made sense.'

She frowned, and moved to pull her hand away. ‘You know, Maverick, I still haven't been completely honest with you.'

He wouldn't let go. ‘What's that supposed to mean? It
is
my baby?'

‘Yes, of course it's yours. There's been no one else. There
is
no one else. But do you remember when you told me about Tina? You were just back from Milan. I asked you about her because I needed to know where I stood with you—how you felt about me before I told you the truth, because I knew you'd hate me then. And, when I asked you what she'd done to you, you said those two things—that she'd lied to you and she'd got pregnant. And I got scared. I was guilty of the very same sins. So I got out of bed while you were on the phone and got dressed, because I knew you'd throw me out the minute I told you. But then Nell asked that I be at the lunch if she was going, and you insisted, and I told myself that I was doing it for Nell. I told you that in my defence. Nell gave me a gold-plated reason not to tell you.'

‘I know. I understand.'

She shook her head. ‘But you don't. Because I didn't do it for Nell. Not entirely. You were right when you mocked me. Because I did it for me. I took the option of staying your mistress for two more weeks over being honest with you then. I took the path of least resistance. Oh, I liked Nell, and wanted her to be happy, but
I
wanted to be happy even more. I couldn't bear the thought of losing you, and I knew that if I told you that's exactly what would happen. I knew I was taking a risk, and it couldn't help but end ugly, and it did.'

‘I'm sorry I made it so ugly for you.'

‘You couldn't help it. I left you no option. I lied to you from the start. I pretended to be someone else. I can't blame you for hating me.'

‘You haven't been listening to me. I told you, I love you.'

She shook her head. ‘You can't mean that. Not after everything that's happened. You don't have to be nice to me just because it's Christmas. I'm not going to make you marry me like that other woman. You don't have to pretend.'

He allowed himself a smile. ‘I'm not being nice to you because it's Christmas. And I know you wouldn't marry me if I was the last man left on Earth, but I was wondering…'

He picked up both her hands in his, stroking the back of them with his thumbs, so tender where the canula was taped into one.

‘I was wondering whether you'd consider having me as your husband if maybe I
wasn't
the last man left on Earth?'

She looked up at him. ‘You're asking me to marry you?'

‘No,' he said. ‘I'm begging you to marry me.'

‘Because I'm having your baby?'

‘The baby is a bonus. I want to marry you because I love you, and I can't stand the thought of trying to live without you.'

‘You
really
love me?'

‘With all my heart and soul.'

She threw her arms around his neck. ‘Of course I will. I have loved you for so long!'

He put her away by the shoulders. ‘You have? Why didn't you tell me?'

‘How could I, when I wasn't even me? How could I admit anything? I didn't even know who I was supposed to be. And meanwhile you were expecting this thing between us to burn out in two weeks.'

He looked into her eyes. ‘This
thing
between us is never going to burn out—you better believe it.'

She looked up at him, her colour back, her eyes warm and delicious, her lips an open invitation. ‘I want to believe it.'

‘Then maybe this will convince you,' he said, and lowered his mouth to hers. He kissed her, with all the depths of passion that he felt for her, with all the respect she deserved for what she'd done, with all the love for her that would never be more than she deserved.

And he felt her love in her kiss, in the way her arms pulled him to her, in the way her mouth moved under his.

The door burst open and a nurse bustled in. ‘Everything all right in here? This man isn't bothering you, is he, Miss Fielding? Your sister sent me in to check.'

‘No,' she said, looking into the eyes of the man she loved, the father of her child, the man she was going to marry. ‘He's not bothering me at all. Tell Morgan everything is just perfect. And you know what else you can tell her for me?'

The nurse looked a little perplexed. ‘What's that?'

Without taking her eyes from his, she smiled up at him, a smile that he'd been looking for for ever, a smile that he would treasure until the day he died, and his heart swelled like it was about to burst.