Paranoia (The Night Walkers) (9 page)

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Authors: J. R. Johansson

Tags: #young adult, #night walker, #night walkers, #ya, #fiction, #crush, #young adult fiction, #sleep, #stalker, #night walker series, #dream

BOOK: Paranoia (The Night Walkers)
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eleven

Between running like my life depended on it for an hour straight, then hopping in my car and doing the errands Mom gave me, it was after noon by the time I got home. Finn’s text had said they were on their way over, but I wasn’t sure if he’d texted from his house or the airport. Either way, they would probably beat me to my house.

I was caked in dried sweat and starving by the time I turned back onto my street. The only thing that could make me smile at that point was sitting parked at the curb in front of my house—Mia’s purple pick-up truck.

I parked in the garage. When I climbed out of my car, I heard something that made me stop and listen. Even from out here, the sound of Addie’s laugh made me smile. It had been a long time since I’d heard her laugh like that. It sounded like some time with Mickey might have helped a few things after all.

“I’m not kidding. This is really the cheese.”

I stood in the doorway for a few extra seconds … there was no way I’d heard that right.

Pushing the door open silently, I walked the few steps toward the kitchen and peeked around the corner. I saw Finn first. He sat at the counter, his face scrunched up as he stared at the television set. It was tuned to the news. My stomach dropped as I caught the tail end of a piece about a couple more people who had been reported missing. Then it moved on to a story about some guy who’d pled innocent to charges of killing a complete stranger. There was something about the smug smile on the district attorney’s face that told me he felt like he’d won his case already.

Now that I knew what Takers could do, I couldn’t help but wonder how much of this might be caused by Cooper or others like him. And what they might do next.

Mia sat next to Finn, biting her lip as she twisted back and forth on her barstool. The movement snapped me out of my dark train of thought. “I’m still confused, Jack,” she was saying. “You’re here because you’re helping Parker now? Since when? And when will he be back?”

“It’s kind of complicated. I think he’d rather tell you, but he should be back soon.” Jack’s voice came from around the corner, and I moved one step closer so I could see him.

He was standing with Addie over a box of mac and cheese. He’d cleaned up and was wearing a dark red shirt, his brown hair smoothed back out of his face. He was standing way closer to her than I wanted him to. Darkness flared inside me, and it took everything in me to hold still and not let loose. I took a deep breath and counted: 1–2–3.

Mia froze on her stool, and when I glanced at her, she grinned and hopped to her feet. “Parker!”

She jogged across the space in an instant and threw her arms around me. It was unexpected and jarring. Not that she’d never hugged me or anything; she’d gotten more and more comfortable over the months that I’d been sharing her dreams. But something about it felt different after reading the text sent from her phone—and I didn’t know if it was her or me that was causing it.

“Hi, Mia.” I started to extract myself from her arms, suddenly aware I hadn’t taken a shower yet, but then Finn stood up and I saw his shirt:
The Voices in My Head are Telling Me to Kill You.

For once, it was just too much. The visuals I’d been avoiding all day pelted me from all directions: Dr. Freeburg’s dream, his body, the bloody paperweight I’d swung at his head, the unity I’d felt with Darkness at that moment … then that same wholeness when I’d gone after Jack. I knew now that I’d killed Freeburg. I had no proof—there was none—but I was sure all the same.

My skin felt hot and icy cold and I stood, staring, with Mia hugging me and everyone’s eyes on me. Finn’s expression was oddly blank. Addie’s mouth dropped open in a cute little “o” of surprise that warmed me a bit in spite of all the other emotions fighting for control.

“Wow, what happened to your eye?” Mia asked, but I didn’t want to get into all that until I’d taken a minute to calm down.

“I see you all got acquainted.” My voice was soft and flat.

When I saw Jack step forward and place a hand on Addie’s shoulder, I felt that familiar fury bubbling inside and knew I had to get away—I had to calm down. Right now, before I ended up hurting someone else.

Grabbing Mia’s hands, I pushed them firmly down to her sides. She took a quick step back in surprise.

“Sorry, guys. Just finished my run, need to grab a quick shower.” I backed down the hall toward my room. “Be right back.”

Instead of my familiar routine of a cold shower to keep me awake, I turned the water as hot as I could stand it and leaned my head against the tile, letting the steaming water run over my shoulders and down my back. Everything in my world felt changed since my friends had left a week ago. I wasn’t even sure where to start.

Darkness still growled low and dark in a corner of my mind. Something primal in him had reacted to seeing Jack touch Addie. He had a jealous streak, but now, knowing Addie was a Builder and could help me, his need for her was stronger than ever. I felt it to my bones, and half of me wanted to let him loose. It might feel good to teach Jack a lesson. But I still needed Jack’s help.

More than that, I knew Addie. She’d be less than impressed … in fact, there was a good chance she’d never talk to me again for doing something to Jack. And I would deserve it.

“Shut up.” My whisper was impossible to hear over the water pounding down on me. “Your instincts are not going to help here.”

Darkness growled louder for a moment, then said, “Fine.” And my head was silent for the first time all day.

I was so shocked I sat there, waiting for one minute—two. Then I grabbed the soap and scrubbed my body, getting out every inch of frustration and resentment Darkness had left in his wake. I didn’t know how long he’d be gone … but I wasn’t going to waste the time.

I hurried out and got dressed in five minutes flat. As I came back into the kitchen and plastered a large, happy smile on my face, my hair was still dripping down the back of my neck.

“Welcome back!” I went to where Mia sat on her barstool first, feeling bad about the way I’d pushed her away before, and gave her a quick squeeze. “Hopefully I smell better this time.”

She laughed and I knew all was forgiven. “Thank God.”

I walked around her to Finn. His smile was back …
although something seemed off behind his eyes. I clapped him on the back in one of our customary man-hugs.

Then, putting on my best fake-mobster accent like we’d done for an entire evening the last time we’d watched
The Godfather
, I said, “Did Mickey take care of yous all like he promised?”

Finn’s smile blossomed into a full-on grin. “Well, he didn’t make us swim with the fishes like yous was afraid of.”

“Oh please, not this again.” Addie laughed behind me.

I turned toward the other side of the kitchen island where she was scooping mac and cheese into bowls with Jack hovering directly behind her. I took all my frustration and ignored him, focusing on her. She smiled wider than I’d seen in a long time. At least Disney World seemed to have done the trick for her. In that case, everything I’d gone through this week was completely worth it.

Walking around the counter, I wrapped her in a tight hug and lifted her off the floor. “Don’t yous dames give us no lip, ya hear?”

She giggled right into my ear and my heart thudded so loud and hard against my chest I swear she had to be able to feel it. It was an incredible feeling, knowing I still had the ability to make her happy like that. I needed to do it more often.

Making them happy made me happy. I didn’t know where I’d lost sight of that, but I felt so much better in that instant than I’d felt in a long time. It made one truth suddenly, stunningly clear. I’d been doing everything wrong. I needed to do everything I was doing in this moment more often. Be with my friends, make them happy, and hug Addie.

Which made another truth clear … I really needed to tell Finn how I felt about Addie, and soon. I was done waiting, and he would understand. I had to make him understand somehow. For a second I considered using my new Watcher ability to
make
him understand in a dream, but I immediately shoved the thought away in disgust. He was my friend and he deserved to be able to make his own decisions. I didn’t want to manipulate him. I just hoped more than anything that he’d take it well.

But all of this wasn’t something to worry about at the moment, not with so many witnesses and so many other pressing things to discuss. It needed to be a private conversation. Besides, I’d hate to have Addie feel like she needed to make her brother stop punching me … that would be awkward.

I lowered Addie to the ground, gently taking her hands down from around my neck, and reached for a spoonful of the mac and cheese. When I looked back, her cheeks were a little flushed and the last bits of her smile had dissolved from her face. Like she’d been a little girl floating high in the sky and I’d suddenly popped all her balloons and brought her back to reality. It started a burning pain in my chest to see it.

So I did the only thing I could with all these people around watching us … I pretended I couldn’t see what was written so clearly on her face. “We eating lunch? I have a lot to catch you guys up on.”

Addie nodded and looked over her shoulder at Jack. He was glaring daggers at me, and Addie looked as surprised as I was by his anger. An instant later it was gone and he said, “I’ll grab spoons and bowls.”

twelve

We all gathered around the table, eating mac and cheese as I filled them in on some of the things that had happened while they were gone. I told them about the run-in with Cooper—none of them knew him, either—and Jack explained that Cooper was a Taker, that he could take over peoples’ bodies while they were sleeping, and all the happy history of the people they kill. He also explained about my dad being a Watcher. He was about to leave off the fact that the Takers had captured him, but I really wanted things to be better, to be different. I needed to be as honest with my friends as I could from now on.

I’d learned, last time, that secrets were more likely to hurt the people I cared about than the truth was. All of Dad’s secrets coming out now only reinforced this fact. My mom was the only possible exception to my new approach, and I was even beginning to doubt that as well.

“My dad has been captured by the Takers,” I blurted out, as Jack looked like he was about to take the conversation another direction.

“What?” Finn stood up from the table and knocked his bowl over … luckily, he was Finn, so it was already empty. “Where? Can we help him?”

“Thanks, man.” I set his bowl upright as he sat back down. “But it sounds like it’s a little more complicated than that.”

Addie and Mia’s faces were pale, and I felt Addie’s hand squeeze my knee before everyone turned their expectant eyes on Jack. He groaned and leaned back in his chair.

“It is more complicated. Parker’s dad left because he was trying to protect him and his mom, and he sent me here to watch over them. If we took Parker into the heart of the Takers, well, we might just be in more danger from his dad than from the Takers.” Jack leaned forward like this was all we needed to know and we were crazy if we didn’t agree.

Finn nodded, steepled his fingers in front of him, and seemed to have calmed down. But I knew him; this conversation was far from over.

“Right, right … but, uh …
so what
?” He leaned across the table until he was so close that Jack looked uncomfortable. Finn didn’t raise his voice, but his tone made it clear that he thought this was the stupidest argument ever heard by mankind. “We’re not going to help his dad because he’ll be mad? Parents are mad at their kids all the time! It’s like … their jobs!”

“We’re also not going to get him because Jack won’t tell me where they have him,” I said softly, sitting back in my chair. I’d promised I’d leave it alone if Jack told me if my dad was in danger. Finn had not made the same promise.

“Going into the Taker stronghold with Parker would be like handing them a giant weapon to use against his dad.” Jack was fuming but he kept his voice level. “Why don’t we bring his mom along while we’re at it?”

He obviously didn’t like being cornered like this, but if it was the only way to get full answers, then I didn’t mind doing it.

Finn leaned back in his chair so hard it almost fell over, but before he could speak again, Mia whispered, “We can’t risk his mom in any way … are the Takers after her?” She swallowed around the obvious emotion in her voice. “One parent is better than none—I promise.”

Addie reached over and wrapped an arm around her.

I’d felt the unbearable loss of one parent. I couldn’t risk anything happening to Mom. “She’s right. Whatever we do, we have to keep my mom safe.”

“That’s why we wait.” Jack nodded. Everything about him had become subdued. “We need to figure out what’s going on with this Cooper guy. Is he the only Taker here? We need to watch, wait for them to make a move, and keep Parker and his mom safe. Once we have those answers, then we can decide if and how to help Danny.”

Everyone at the table seemed to stutter on the name “Danny.” As always, Finn was the one to ask about it.

“Danny?” He looked to me instead of Jack for the explanation. He knew my dad’s name, and he knew that was who Jack was talking about. He just wanted to know why.

“Yeah … I’m still getting used to it too.” I rubbed my hand through my now almost-dry hair.

Jack shook his head and got to his feet. “Sorry. You’d prefer Daniel? Or Mr. Chipp, perhaps?”

I shrugged. The pain I felt at knowing how much better Jack knew my own dad wasn’t going to be eased by him calling him something different.

“Yeah. That would probably be an improvement.” Finn seemed ready to fight; Jack had rubbed him the wrong way.

“Finn, it’s not worth arguing about.” I grabbed his shoulder, but he turned and jerked away. For the first time, I started to wonder whether Finn was angry at Jack or me.

“You okay, man?”

Finn mumbled something, nodded, and took his bowl to the sink. I watched him scrub at his fork like it had offended him greatly. How had I managed to tick him off already?

“Oh, there is one more thing.” Jack raised his head and smiled at Addie. It felt like my intestines had turned to ice. “You should know that there are three types of Night Walkers. You know about the Watchers—” He gestured to me and then to himself. “And now you know about the Takers.”

Addie shuddered, slid her chair out from the table, and got to her feet, placing her spoon inside her bowl. “And the third?”

Jack reached out and took her bowl with a small smile. “You are the third.”

Addie blinked at him, then looked at me, then at Mia. “I think you have me confused with her … I’m not the one with the cool dreams.”

Jack laughed, put the dishes in the sink, and came back. “You are definitely the one. You’re what we call a Builder, Addie.” He winked at her and leaned in like he was sharing a secret. “And I can help you learn how to build dreams that will let you help Watchers.”

Darkness popped up suddenly right beside Addie and Jack. His hands were clenched into useless fists in front of him. The only sounds escaping his mouth at the moment were growls. He was like the embodiment of all the anger and frustration I’d become so good at burying. Watching him was … well, it was bizarre. There was no other way to put it.

In some ways, it helped me to recognize the emotion as not helpful and cool down faster, but Darkness didn’t look
any calmer as he shouted across them to me.

“How can you just sit here and watch this?” He turned his back, took a breath, and walked toward me. “Together we’re stronger than him. Much stronger. We could
make him
leave her alone.”

“Shh … ” I whispered, and I think Mia was the only one who heard me. She glanced my way, but what Jack was saying was far more interesting, so her gaze only lingered for an instant.

Not that his suggestion sounded like a half-bad idea, but I was done paying attention to Darkness. I was watching the emotions on Addie’s face as she processed everything Jack was saying. Even if it wasn’t clear to Jack, it was very obvious to me that she didn’t need me to jump in and keep him away.

I whispered one word so soft I knew that no one but the person I shared my brain with would be able to hear it. “Wait.”

“And how do
you
know I’m a Builder and Mia isn’t?” Addie’s voice was soft. Her lips curved in a sweet smile.

“Because I’ve watched your dreams. A lot of them, actually. Mia has been great for Parker, and the self-hypnosis has made it so she can help him a little. That’s great, but it’s not at all the same as what you can do. Not everyone”—he pointed at me over his shoulder—“can tell a Builder when they see one. But you don’t need to worry. I’m sure about this.”

“Well, that’s a relief. One question, though … ” Then Addie’s tone got harder with every word and she stood up on tiptoe. “Who exactly invited you into my head?”

Jack’s eyes grew wide and he took a step back. I could almost hear his brain backpedaling, and Mia hid a giggle behind her hand. “I—uh … I didn’t think … I’m sorry.”

“No.” Addie lowered back down to flat feet. “You didn’t think. I accept your apology, but I don’t want you in my dreams again until I invite you. Okay?”

Jack nodded reluctantly, and when he spoke again he was significantly less confident in his approach. “Being a Builder is cool, though. I can teach you to control your dreams in every way. They become a canvas, and you can create anything you want.”

Mia flinched beside me at the word “canvas.” Everything about this conversation seemed to be upsetting someone. I walked closer, put my hand on her shoulder, and whispered, “You okay?”

She nodded but looked up at me. Her dark blue eyes, which used to be fearful, were now wide and trusting. I hoped I’d earned her trust now as much as I’d earned her fear before. The way she started twisting her fingers together, though, clearly spoke of nerves. I made her nervous?

“When this conversation is done, I need to talk to you—alone,” she said.

Her text … right. I’d almost convinced myself it had come from Addie. I hid my discomfort with a nod and turned back to face Addie and Jack. He was busy explaining everything a Builder could do to help a Watcher heal, improve, and generally have a full life. She was looking less offended and more interested in Jack by the second. Perfect.

“But … how did I become a Builder? What made you and Parker into Watchers? What happened to us?”

I froze and all my attention shifted straight to Jack. Of course Addie would think of the one question I hadn’t even thought to ask. My brain must have been even more exhausted than I’d thought.

“It’s a long story. The gist of it is that a few years prior to 1900, there was a team of Russian scientists that worked with Marie de Manacéine. She was studying sleep deprivation and its effects on animals. During the first World War, some of the scientists decided to do something useful with what they learned.”

“This started in World War I?” My words came out low and hushed. Everyone else in the room was absolutely silent, including Darkness. I tried to ignore his presence, but at the moment it felt like I was standing next to a mirror. He stood directly beside me with all his attention on Jack. Exactly like me. I shuddered.

“Yeah.” Jack shook his head. “They figured that if they could mix up a few chemicals and end up with an army that didn’t need to sleep, that would be a pretty huge asset. They tested a drug and it worked, so it was distributed to select units within the armies of all Russian allies. Only after distributing it widely did they realize that it only helped most soldiers stay awake and alert for about a month before they started collapsing. It ended up killing one in ten people that took it, within a year. The majority woke up with no other effects … until a few of their kids, or grandkids, or great-grandkids started having strange sleep issues.”

He was silent for a few seconds before Addie sighed and said, “Why do greedy people always screw up everything?”

“How has it been kept a secret this long?” Mia took a step closer. Her expression was worried and she couldn’t seem to decide whether to look at Addie, Jack, or me. The result was that her eyes kept darting between all three of us.

“The scientists were still alive when the first Takers popped up. There were Watchers and Builders first, but no one had identified the Builders and no one really believed the Watchers. But when it comes to someone who can take over the body of a scientist and go have a conversation with another scientist, proving their claim … well, that’s a lot harder to argue with. So they moved into an old bomb shelter and started the NWS. I guess since they were studying the effects of their own mistakes, they kept it all a secret. They wanted to help. To fix the problem they’d created, but they died before they could find a cure. Others like us took up searching where the scientists left off. Rather than become the government’s lab rats, the NWS has run things this way ever since.”

“NWS?” Addie’s eyes were locked on me even though her question was clearly for Jack. We were joined in more ways than we’d ever expected.

“I had no idea the National Weather Service was involved in big secret projects.” Finn peered around me to grin at Mia, and she laughed.

“Night Walker Society.” The bitterness in Jack’s voice cut off Mia’s laughter and forced both my and Addie’s eyes back to him. “It was founded to help our kind, but in the last twenty years it’s pretty much become the Takers’ thug club. It took two full years of their behavior getting worse and worse before the other Night Walkers rebelled. The NWS is the group that has Parker’s dad.”

I leaned back against the table and tried to digest all this new information. The people who were supposed to be looking for a way to help Night Walkers like me were the same ones who’d captured Dad? They were the reason he’d left us in the first place? Who could we trust if we couldn’t trust the group that was formed to save us?

Mia walked right through Darkness and he faded like nothing more than smoke. She rested a hand on my shoulder and I flinched before I heard her voice asking if I was okay. I raised my eyes and met Addie’s hazel gaze. She looked worried, upset … and something else that I hadn’t seen on her in a long while. Was she jealous? I took a small step to one side and Mia dropped her hand, wringing them both in front of her.

“I’m fine. Thanks, Mia.” I straightened my shoulders and looked around at the whole group. “At least now I know who we’re up against.”

Finn stood off to my right, and I could tell from his angry breathing and his stance that he wasn’t happy either. It was nice to know he’d always be there to back me up. But I faltered back a step when I saw that his glare wasn’t directed at the idea of the NWS or even at Jack … it was at me.

“Something wrong?”

He scoffed and walked past me out into the backyard.

Darkness had appeared again, next to the back door. He chuckled as he leaned against the wall. “You sure know how to make a mess out of every situation, don’t you?”

I stared at the ground and rubbed the back of my neck as I tried to sort out where I’d gone wrong with Finn. “I’m guessing that’s a yes … ”

Mia looked from me to the back door in confusion.

“You don’t know what’s going on either?” I asked.

She shook her head. “He’s been acting weird since yesterday.”

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