Parker's Island (12 page)

“Delaney, what’s wrong
?  W
hat happened
to you
?” 

“Logan, oh Logan, please don’t look at me.” I said,
pulling the jacket tight
er
around me.  Suddenly
it was too much for me to
endure
,
and
I
collapsed on
the ground.

I woke up
in a panic,
once again unsure of where I was.  “It’s okay, you’re fine!” Logan said, immediately at my side.

“What happened?” I asked.

“
I’m afraid
that’s something
you’re going to have to tell me
,
”
h
e said, looking very concerned.

“I don’t know…
I don’t remember
,
” I said blocking out what I
didn’t want to
face.

“
Delaney, I think we should call the police.”

“Why?”

“I think you were…
hurt
.”

“No, I’m fine.”

“I don’t think you are.  Do you remember why you were running down the road?”
h
e asked, trying to make me remember what I had tried so hard to block out.

“No.”

“I think you do
,
”
h
e said, touching my cheek.

“NO!  I don’t!  I’m fine
,
” I lied
, but still in denial as to what I was lying about.

“Okay, you just rest now
,
”
h
e said, standing up.

“NO, don’t leave me!” I said, reaching for him.

“I’m not going anywhere
.
”
H
e sat down next to me on the bed a
nd pulled
the blankets up around me, tucking me in.

“What are you doing here?” I asked, finally realizing that I was actually with Logan.

“I live here, most of the time
,
anyway.”

“You live here?  You live on the island?”
  The island, suddenly I remembered what had happened and I jumped up.  “Oh no.  Oh no.
NO NO NO!
”

“It’s okay. You’re okay now!”

“No, it’s never going to be okay again.  NEVER!”

“You’re safe
,
Delaney.  No one can hurt you here
,
I promise.”

“I need a shower.”  I realized I suddenly needed to wash all memories of the night away.

“I really think we should call the police first
,
”
h
e urged.

“No!  I have to shower now!  PLEASE! Please. Oh please
,
”
I begged, frantic
.

He looked at me like he understood my urgent need for a shower and led me to the bathroom.

“Will you be okay?”

“
It doesn’t
matter
.
I have to do this
right now
.”

“I’ll be right outside the door.”  He shut the door gently.

I threw off
what was left of
my clothes
and stepped into the shower.  I only turned on the hot water, and as hot as it was and as red as my skin turned, it wasn’t hot enough to wash away the memory.  I
scrubbed;
using an entire bottle of body wash, then scrubbed my hair and used the rest of the shampoo on my body as well.  When I was out of all soap products I just stood under the hot water, certain I would never be clean again.

The water
finally
turned cold and I slid down the shower wall and curled into the fetal position
on the floor of the shower
, and cried.

I didn’t know how long the cold water
washed
over me and I didn’t answer Logan when he asked if I was okay.  I just laid there, shivering at the bottom of the shower, wishing the tears would stop and th
e
night had never happened.

The next thing I knew, Logan
had
turned the water off
,
wrapped me in a towel
and carried me back to the bed.
  He held me for what seemed like hours while I cried.

When I was finally spent and had no more tears, Logan said, “Delaney, we really should call the police.”

“I
can’t.  I can’t re-live…
I just can’t.”
             
“Whoever did this to you NEEDS to be punished
,
”
h
e said,
sounding very angry
;
an emotion I had never seen Logan express before.
             
“Please don’t call the police.  I couldn’t bear the humiliation
,
” I pleaded.

“Would you at least tell
me
who
..
.did this?”
h
e
aske
d
,
his hands clenched into fists.

“I…I don’t remember
,
” I lied, fearing that Logan may go after Chad and I couldn’t live with that
,
either
.

Logan sighed and asked, “Was it Brian?”

“NO!  Brian wouldn’t…NO!”

“I’m sorry.  I had to ask.”

“How could you think that Brian would…?”

“I know he was your date to the party.  I didn’t think he would…hurt you, but I had to ask.”

“How did you know he was my dat
e?” I asked, curious now.

“I
um
, I saw you two walking on the beach earlier tonight
,
”
h
e admitted shamefully.

“You were on the beach?”

“
Ye
s
. 
I saw you get off the ferry.  You looked so beautiful
.  Y
ou are beautiful.  I parked outside the hotel, hoping to see you again. 
When I saw you two head to the beach,
I drove down the highway
and followed you
.  I know I ha
ve no right to be jealous, but I was.
  Delaney, you have to tell me who did this to you, PLEASE!
”

“I told you, I don’t remember.”

“I’m sorry, but I don’t believe you.”

“It’s true
.
I think I was drugged.  Both Brian and
I got sick…
Oh
,
I hope
Brian
’
s okay. 
W
hat time is it?  I have to get on the ferry.”

“It’s after 3
am
, so
the
ferries
are done for the night.  I’m afraid you’re stuck here.”

“Oh no
, w
hat am I going to tell Molly
a
nd m
y parents
?
  T
hey
can never know about this!  It would kill them!”

“Don’t worry about it right now.  You can call Molly in the morning.
  Would you like to put some clothes on?”
h
e
asked;
glancing away from me as the towel slipped off my shoulder, exposing the top of one of my breasts.

I pulled the towel up and said, “Yes, but I can’t put that dress back on
, and I don’t have anything…
”

“Here
,
”
h
e said, hand
ing
me one of his shirts.

“Thank you.”

He turned his back so that I could change.  “I’ll be right outside the door.”

“No, it
’
s okay, I’m already dressed.” 

He turned back around and took a deep breath.  “I thought you looked
stunning
in the dress, but I don’t think you’ve ever looked more
beautiful
than you do
right now.”

“I don’t feel beautiful
.  I don’t know what to feel.”

“Please tell me who did it. 
You know who it was
;
I can see it in your eyes.”

“I don’t…I can’t.
             
“Why are you protecting him?”

“I’m NOT!  I’m protecting you.”

“From what?”

“From doing whatever it is you’re planning.  I can
see it in
your
eyes
.”

“He deserves to suffer
,
Delaney.  He had no right to…”

I started to cry again, and Logan was there, holding me.  “I’m sorry.  I didn’t mean to upset you
,
again.
”

“Please, can you just let it go?  Please
?
”

“Can you?”

“I have to try.  I have to.  If I go after…him, then everyone would know
. 
A
nd I can’t live with that.”

“Okay, we’ll talk about it in the morning.  Why don’t you just sleep now?  You can take a ferry home
tomorrow
.”  He stood up and started to walk out the door.

“Please don’t leave me.  I don’t want to be alone.”

“I’ll stay.
”

“
W
ould you hold me, please?  I feel so…
lost
and alone
.”

“I’m afraid I won’t
ever
want to let you go
,
”
h
e said.

“It’s okay
.
I understand
if you can’t
,
” I said and pulled the blankets up tight around my neck.

H
e climbed onto the bed, laying on top of all the blankets, and wrapped his arm around my waist.  “Just sleep now
,
okay.  You’re safe.”

As long as Logan’s arms were around me, it was easy to forget Chad and the horrible thing he had done to me.  I leaned into Logan, and exhaustion finally took hold.  I fell into a deep sleep.

When I woke up, I thought I was still sleeping and having
the most
wonderful dream.  Logan was next to me, with his arm
snuggly wrapped around my waist.  “Please don’t let me wake up from this dream
,
” I said
out loud
to myself.

He smiled then and said, “That’s what I said all night.”

I wanted so badly to reach out and touch his face, certain I was dreaming.  But a gnawing feeling kept inching its way
back
into my subconscious, reminding me of recent events and that it really wasn’t a dream at all.

“What, what time is it?”  I asked, sitting up in the bed
,
Logan’s bed.  Suddenly I felt completely self-conscious and
very
vulnerable.

Logan must have sensed my
distress because he stood up and walked over to the chair.

“It’s 9:30.  You slept for about
six
hours.”

“O
h
.  I guess I should get dressed…
”
I remembered then that I didn’t have any clothes to wear.

“Hold on one minute.  I’ll be right back
,
” Logan said.

He came back a few minutes later with a skirt and blouse.  “Thank you
,
”
I said
, staring down at the clothes and wondering where he got them
.

“I’ll wait downstairs for you
,
okay
?
  There are clean towels and everything you should need in the bathroom.”

I stood up
then
, and remembered I
was only
wearing one of Logan’s shirts
.
I pulled it down as it had climbed up my thigh while I slept.
  He took a deep breath
,
turned around
and said
, “I, I’ll see you downstairs.”