penance. a love story (The Böhme Series) (32 page)

“We will have to compare notes sometime
,” I said with a wink and a kiss to the top of her head before turning to go into Petra’s apartment. I heard her snicker to herself behind me as I opened the door and an easy smile formed on my face.

“Petra?” I asked, walking into her kitchen.

“Oh my, Wynn, I haven’t seen you in a while,” Petra responded from her living room. I walked in and found her lying on her couch watching an old black and white film. I couldn’t remember the title, but it was one of Petra's favorites.

“Yep, it’s me the one and only
,” I said as I sat in the old rocker that belonged to her great-grandmother. “How have you been?”

“Well, I’ve been better,” s
he said as she lifted the remote to lower the volume. “Me old bum is hurting.” She spoke with a false Irish accent that sounded odd with her German one.

“I heard. I guess Sid won’t be able to take
you to Salsa lessons after all.” I joked and she raised an eyebrow at my mocking statement and I laughed. “I’m serious, Petra. You guys need to get over your selves and go out on a date again. You have always been so close,” I said with a sigh.

“Wynn, we’ve been friends for far too
long. That is not in our cards.” She gave me a pointed glance. “Believe me, I know.” She smiled. “I read the cards several times to find out. Plus if we were to get together that will cause a scandal for everyone at the gallery.”

I laughed
. “Petra, why do you believe in that superstition? Cards, runes, palm reading—it’s just chance and numbers.”

She sighed and shook her head as she pulled her quilt up to her waist and sat up, curling her legs under her. “Oh Wynn, fate is fate. Even if the cards read otherwise, if it’s not our fate, it’s not our fate. If we were to be with each other, it would have happened years ago. People can’t have their lives intertwined for so long and change this late in life. We are more like siblings than lovers.”

I pinched my lips together and cocked my head to the side in question. “How do you know you aren’t?”

“Because my thoughts don't drift to Sid, that’s how I know. I don’t dream of being near him. He doesn’t fluster me and I don’t have that contrasting ache of the chest where sometimes you feel lost to the person and sometimes you feel free because you can't believe you found someone like them. I don’t have any of that. I care for him though. I want him to always be happy and be in his place, right where he’s meant to be.”

“When was the last time you watched him in his element?” I asked, and she scowled at my question.

“It’s been years,” s
he responded. “I’ve never watched him give a tattoo though if that's what you mean, and I haven’t even been in his shop for months. The last time was to ask if he had change for a twenty.”

“I don't mean tattoos. I mean with his painting. I think you need to watch him in that element and you will feel a change. Something happens when you watch another person living and breathing their passion. I bet you’ll get a spark going between you two. It’s inevitable. You must have some thoughts about him if you were reading your cards so much
,” I said as I rocked in her chair.

“Who made you matchmaker Wynn Hawthorne?” Her unusual skepticism baffled me
. “It's very unlike you and it’s making me wonder if you need to go in for a head examination.” Her accent grew thicker as she spoke. I was getting to her because she knew I was right.

I laughed
. “Petra, nothing is going on with me.”

She sat up straighter and her eyes grew wide. She lowered her glasses to look over them at me
. “I know what it is, boy," she said as she pointed at me. “It’s our, Hannah, isn’t it?"

I smil
ed. “Yes, Petra, it's Hannah,” I said as Petra leaned back into the couch and let out a sigh, looking at the ceiling a big smile spread across her face. “What?” I asked.

She met my eyes
. “Wynn, this means so much to me. I knew it. I knew the day I met her and she came into my shop. She is a hurting young woman and you are a hurting young man and sometimes when two people hurt so much, they can meet and make each other’s pain lessen. But there’s something more than that pain that draws you to each other and that thing is the possibility of what’s coming and oh I can’t wait for what is to come.” She smiled at me and the look on her face made me wonder if she was going to bounce and clap her hands like a teenage girl. “We all have pain, but when you find someone who understands you in your pain, that is beautiful. You two drew to each other for a purpose. Maybe you are each other’s purpose.”

“Petra,” I said as I rose and gave her a hug
. “You need to take your own advice, too.” I gave her a wink. “And you need to steer clear of the romance section.”

I heard the door to her apartment open and Hannah came in and gave me yet another genuine smile. I liked seeing that smile on her. She turned to speak to Petra, but took my hand with one of hers and rested the other around my bicep. "I’m going to hav
e to leave for a couple days," she said. “Are you going to be okay? I can make up my time missed later in the week and will still work my hours for you.”

“Don’t worry about it schatz. I’ll be fine.
I’m already feeling better now.” She looked at me and gave me a wink. “You take all the time you need. Is this about the call you got earlier?”

Hannah nodded
. “Yeah, I have to go back home. Wynn’s taking me,” she said with a smile that she gave right to me.

“I’ll be fine. You go take care of business, kids
,” Petra said as Hannah let go of me to hug her. As they embraced, Petra gave me a wink with a thumb up over Hannah's shoulder. I rolled my eyes at her and shook my head.

I followed Hannah out of the shop and as we stepped out of the store, a cool breeze danced around us and pushed her hair out of her face. It billowed around her, creating a fl
uid dance. She pulled a light stocking cap out of her sweatshirt pocket. She put it on, pulling it over her ears and wrapped her hair into her usual bun. I missed the beauty of it dancing free, but every movement she made captivated me. She turned with a demure smile and the height of the sun in the sky cast an orange glow across her face. She was breathtaking.

“Do we have to head out right away?” I asked her.

“No, how come?” she asked as her smile widened.

“I want you to meet someone.”

She tilted her head to the side with a mischievous smile. “Okay.”

I took her hand and walked toward Sid’s shop. I had never held hands with anyone like this and it felt awkward at first. I was self-conscious as to how Hannah would react to me holding her hand in the open. When I saw the blissful gleam in her eyes, awkwardness faded.

“I like this,” she said as she wrapped her other hand around my bicep again. “I feel at home with you.”

“Good. You
should
feel at home with me.” I laughed, and she feigned annoyance, attempting to push me away. “What? You think I’m joking?” I gave her a deadpan expression which made her laugh in return.

“I think you like to use sarcasm to depreciate
any good someone says to you,” she said with a knowing smile.

“I agree
.” I smiled and pointed at Sid’s sign. “We’re here.”

She met my eyes and held her smile
. “Is this
the
Sid?”

I nodded in response as I pushed the door open to enter. “Give me one second okay. I will be right back.”

She nodded in agreement as she took a seat on the bench outside his shop.

I stepped into the shop and found Sid leaning on his front counter reading a magazine. The light
blazed in his front window and the painted sign created a silhouette across his face, making it appear like he had a giant
S
tattooed on him. He looked up when he saw me and he tilted his head in question. “What’s up with you?” he asked in a confused tone.

I rolled my eyes at his question. “Why does everyone keep asking me that?”

“I think it has something to do with the shit eating grin across your face and it's odd,” he said with a crooked smile. He tossed his magazine to the side as he tried to decipher my expression.

“I met someone, okay
,” I said with a smile. I looked back toward the door and saw Hannah still sitting on the bench, watching people walk past her. It reminded me of the first time I saw her.

Sid sat up with such a jolt it made me step back. “Are you serious?” He stepped around his counter and put his hands on my shoulders and examined my face
. “Holy hell, you are serious,” he said as he stepped away to examine me.

“Yes, and I was stopping in because I need to take her home for the weekend. Her parents live out of town and she asked me to go with her.”

His smile spread across his face even more and he pulled me in for a hug. It was something he never did. We were close, but he never hugged me. “I hope this works out for you Wynn. I hated what happened to you growing up, you deserve happiness.”

I lacked a response to his confession and brought the subject back to why I was there. “Well, she’s here
,” I said as I looked out the window again.

“She is?” h
e asked in shock and I nodded. “Well, bring her in, man.”

“Okay
,” I said as my face tightened from the size of the smile spreading across it. I turned to open the door for Hannah.

“It suits you Wynn
,” Sid said in a quiet resonance. I raised my eyebrow in question and he responded. “Happiness suits you,” he continued as Hannah walked in behind me.

I took her hand and led her further into the shop as Sid watched us, with a joy in his eyes.

“This is Hannah.” I smiled at him as we let go of each other’s hand and she pushed hers toward him to shake.

He looked from her hand to her face and pulled her in for a hug. He held her in the hug for longer than I expected and as he did he spoke into her ear. I couldn’t hear what he said and saw her nod as she listened to him. He dropped her embrace and kept his hands on her shoulders as he looked in her eyes.

“Well, Hannah. You are breathtaking and I can’t thank you enough for putting the beatific expression on Wynn’s face.”

“That again?” I asked as I rolled my eyes once more.

“I can’t help it, Wynn. That smile is more natural than any I have ever seen on you.” He gave me a crooked grin.

Hannah lowered her head with a shy smile. She looked amazing when she was shy. Her confidence was beautiful, but when she was shy it was incredible because her mask was no longer in place. Her guard dropped and she let her innermost feelings show.

“Well, on that note. We should get heading out. I have to drop you off to get packed.”

“Okay, sounds good
,” she said as she took my hand with a smile and turned to Sid. “It was very nice to meet you.”

He smiled his usual carefree grin, and it morphed into the largest one I had ever seen on his face
. “Believe me, the pleasure is all mine. I hope to see more of you, Hannah.”

She smiled at Sid, but looked at me as she respon
ded. “I am positive you will.” Hannah started to the door with me in tow. She gave me a gentle tug that made me laugh. I turned and waved to Sid as he went back to his book

As soon
as we exited the building Hannah’s smile grew wider. “Okay, Sid is awesome.”

Wynn dropped me at my apartment to pack a small bag for our trip. We had little space on the bike for traveling so I planned to pack light. I told Wynn packing light was the way I rolled, and he got a kick out of that. I used humor to focus on a trip alone with him instead of the reason for it in the first place.

My mom called, saying they received news and she refused to give it to me over the phone. I argued with her for a while because it was as if they were attempting to trick me into coming. But I couldn’t help but wonder what happened to have her reach out to me with such urgency.

It will be night when we leave and though they live an hour from me, I chose not to go to their house until the following afternoon. I hoped to have time alone with Wynn and planned to put off seeing my parents as long as possible.

My hand shook as soon as I hung up the phone with my mom at the thought of seeing her and my father. It had been two years since I left their house and I remembered that last day well. My
dad told me though I still walked above ground, he considered me dead. They were just words without meaning though. He still called now and then to check on me. Granted, the occasional phone call held disdain, and I learned to let them go to voicemail.

My mother never said hurtful things to me, but she had no backbone when it came to him. Her lack of defense for her children was a slap in the face just as strong as my father's hand. They fought with each other as well. She tried to hide their fighting from my sister and me. But we heard every word of it. They argued, and I hated every minute of it. They didn’t use to fight. We were happy for most of my life until I was six, then things changed and I didn’t understand what happened. I still don’t. Maybe they just grew apart, just as Lily and I had.