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Authors: Juliet Archer

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Chapter Sixteen

Lunch proved to be quite an ordeal for Anna. Not only because she was opposite Rick and hearing his voice at length, its familiar northern lilt intact despite all those years in Australia; but also for other reasons … The boys played up and everyone seemed to expect her to control them. Kyle couldn’t make it, which meant that Henrietta competed with Lou for Rick’s attention. Mona was even more abrasive than usual, mainly because Charles – well, Anna would be having a little chat with Charles. Sophie sat next to her and was so nice that it hurt. And, last but by no means least, Barbara had one of her culinary disasters.

The prawn cocktail starter looked harmless enough, appetisingly served on a bed of crisp lettuce with lemon wedges and the local bakery’s renowned wholemeal bread. Anna stared at it, fighting off unpleasant memories. The Marie Rose sauce reminded her of that silk emulsion she’d once used on her bedroom walls at Kellynch. Walter hadn’t noticed this little act of defiance until weeks later, when the door was open and he happened to be passing. He’d turned a similar colour to the walls, only much, much deeper–

‘What exactly are these, Barb?’

Anna glanced up. Roger was chewing warily and examining his fork, which had a couple of glistening sauce-smeared lumps on the end. She sneaked a look round the table and found that everyone seemed to be waiting with bated breath for Barbara’s reply. Or perhaps they were glad of the excuse to stop eating.

‘Prawns, dear.’ Unperturbed, Barbara speared a lump from her own plate and popped it into her mouth.

Silence. Then Lou said, stifling a giggle, ‘No, Mum, they’re more like lychees.’

‘Oh, shit.’ Barbara dropped her fork, jumped up and ran out of the dining room.

‘That means it’s prawn trifle for dessert,’ Roger explained, with a sigh. ‘And she’s gone to see if she can rustle up something else. We need to find her specs, and soon.’

‘For God’s sake, this is ridiculous.’ Mona yanked Harry’s plate away and he gave a loud wail.

‘Let him have it, Mona, it won’t do him any harm,’ Roger said. ‘Everyone else can leave theirs, though. It’s an acquired taste.’

But Mona ignored him and Harry’s wails continued – until Anna made him a lettuce sandwich from her own starter, which she no longer felt like tackling. Not after Lou whispered something to Rick and, for the first time in ten years, Anna felt the warmth of his smile. No longer directed at her, of course …

Ed cleared his plate with apparent relish. ‘When Sophie and I did a few trips round Europe in our camper van, we took a supply of tinned food and ate all sorts of weird combinations. Tuna with peaches in syrup was a particular favourite, wasn’t it, Soph?’

Sophie laughed. ‘I remember. Actually, this is pretty good – although I’m not sure I could cope with prawn trifle. More water, Anna?’

And Anna smiled and nodded and went through the motions of enjoying herself.

Until during the main course, when – out of nowhere – Ollie said in his clear piping voice, ‘Daddy, I saw you kiss Aunty Anna in the middle of the night.’

Rick thought that they covered it up rather well. Anna looked startled, rather than guilty. But then she would, wouldn’t she? Just to brazen it out. Charles, on the other hand, tried to laugh it off.

‘I thought you were asleep, Oliver Musgrove! Aunty Anna certainly was, in that chair by your bed. Looked so peaceful, I couldn’t resist. And I kissed you too, didn’t I? Silly old Daddy.’

Ollie opened his mouth to say more, but his father promptly changed the subject. ‘This beef’s delicious, Mum, more than makes up for the starter. Nothing like a traditional English roast dinner, is there, Rick?’

For Barbara’s sake, Rick agreed – with an enthusiasm he certainly didn’t feel. What he did feel was his throat constricting each time he forced his food down. How could Anna and Charles do this – to Mona, to the kids, to the whole family? The Musgroves seemed to believe Charles’s pathetic story without any problem, although he detected a faint air of embarrassment. Not so Mona, however. Judging by the way she carved up the meat on Harry’s plate, a radical solution to family planning was in store for Charles.

Now Henrietta was murmuring in his ear and he had to lean closer to catch her words.

‘What do you mean, am I a bit of a barnacle?’ he said, his thoughts elsewhere.

On his other side, Lou let out a little shriek. ‘Oh Henrietta, how could you? That was
my
line!’

Henrietta shrugged. ‘You had your chance to use it and you didn’t.’

‘I was going to, you had no right–’

‘Calm down, girls!’ Barbara put in, with mock severity. ‘And please explain yourselves. No one knows what you’re talking about, especially Rick.’

‘It’s in his book,’ Henrietta began, then giggled. ‘Which I’ve read three times so far.’

‘Page fifty-six, to be exact,’ Lou went on. ‘Rick’s comparing different fish in terms of their sex organs–’

‘The males, that is.’

‘Well, obviously.’

‘It’s not obvious at all, is it, Rick? Some of the females–’

‘Hey, leave me out of this.’ By now Rick had a fair idea of where the conversation was heading. The barnacle had the longest penis in the world – in relation to its body size. There must be worse things to discuss over a dinner table with the present company, but none came to mind immediately. For one mad moment, he imagined asking Anna – in front of everyone – if she’d like to reply to Henrietta’s question from first-hand experience. He might even suggest that she justified her answer with some intimate details about her current relationship. He was confident that he’d outperform Charles on all counts.

Huh, that’d wipe the butter-wouldn’t-melt look off her face.

He turned to Henrietta and said, as patiently as he could, ‘The whole point of my book is that, for sea creatures, sex isn’t driven by the same considerations as modern-day humans. It’s about adapting to a hostile environment and maximising the chances of reproduction. That’s why – with the barnacle, for example – size matters. All very straightforward, none of that love and commitment crap.’

Across the table, Sophie grinned. ‘Actually, that sounds like one or two men I know.’

He frowned at her. ‘They probably have their reasons. If women were more like the females of most other species – well, the world would be a happier place.’

Ed gave a great guffaw. ‘I bet none of you realised that Rick is a leading expert on misogyny, as well as sea dragons.’

‘And Mum, before you ask, you won’t find misogyny swimming about off the coast of Australia,’ Charles added.

Barbara pretended to take offence. ‘I know perfectly well what misogyny is, I’ve been married to your father for thirty odd years.’ She gave Rick a sympathetic look. ‘You just haven’t met the right person yet, it makes all the difference.’

‘Or maybe he has and she’s hurt him, very very badly.’ Sophie again, on a little fishing expedition of her own.

He looked straight at his sister, shutting out the woman next to her, who he sensed was waiting – more than anyone – for his reply, and selected his words with care.

‘I’ve been let down, if that’s what you mean. But I wasn’t hurt, except for my pride. And she did me a big favour, actually, because she wasn’t the right person for me. She wasn’t the right person at all.’

Chapter Seventeen

Anna hoped she left the table without arousing any suspicions. In the downstairs cloakroom she took long gulps of air and willed the tears to stop.

Everyone would assume that Rick was referring to Shelley, but she suspected that his remarks were meant for her. He was sending a message, loud and clear: in the end, it didn’t matter that she’d let him down because ‘she wasn’t the right person at all’.

How could he say such a thing? How
could
he, after all the times he’d told her that she was the one he wanted to spend the rest of his life with?

Of course, maybe he still needed closure – maybe they both did. Because, after that horrible confrontation with Walter and Minty, the lines of communication had been swiftly severed: Natasha stopped sending the children to the sailing club, Anna’s mobile and laptop were removed ‘for repair’, and Anna herself was soon spirited back to England.

Katya told her later that Rick had called at the house and asked to see her, very politely; but Natasha sent him away, and he never came back …

A thump on the door.

Sod it, was there no privacy – not even in the bloody loo?

‘Need a wee.’

Harry. If she didn’t let him in, there’d be an accident – and she’d be the one clearing it up, no doubt. As for privacy, she’d have that soon enough, on the drive back to Bath and during the long days – and nights – ahead.

By the time she and Harry returned to the dining room, all the plates had been cleared away – even her meal, only half-eaten. She felt a surge of resentment. The Musgroves took it for granted that she wasn’t interested in food, just as they took
her
for granted as someone who could wave a magic wand and turn Mona into a reasonable human being.

She took her seat, aware of Rick looking in her direction; but she refused to meet his gaze. Why give him the satisfaction of knowing that his words had hit their target?

Then Barbara announced that there’d be a ten-minute wait for dessert; the rhubarb crumble she’d unearthed from the freezer needed a little longer in the oven to heat through.

Henrietta grinned at her mother. ‘Are you sure it’s just rhubarb?’

‘Absolutely,’ Barbara replied calmly. ‘We’d be able to smell it otherwise, wouldn’t we?’

Lou nudged Rick and leaned in close. ‘They’re talking about Mum’s legendary rhubarb and garlic crumble. Can you pour me some more wine?’

Rick was just about to do so when Lou’s hand pounced on his, almost making him drop the bottle. ‘Let me help,’ she said, looking up at him from under her lashes. ‘You seem a little out of practice.’

He responded with the ghost of a smile, as if acknowledging the subtext. And that was all the encouragement Lou needed; her strong brown fingers clamped his to the bottle and lingered long after they’d poured the wine together. Anna forced her gaze away from their coupled hands to her own, clenched together on her lap.

‘Rhubarb and garlic?’ Sophie put in. ‘How did that come about?’ There was a definite hint of distaste in her voice; hardly surprising, but Anna wondered if it had more to do with Lou and Rick.

Lou didn’t answer, so Barbara took up the story. ‘Oh, as usual I was trying to do too many things at once – making a stew at the same time as a crumble – and the phone rang, and while I was talking I stirred the chopped garlic into the rhubarb by mistake.’ She added, with a rueful smile, ‘I couldn’t smell anything because I had a cold, so I simply carried on and served up the crumble, beautifully cooked but stinking to high heaven. The family have never let me forget it.’

Roger chuckled. ‘You see what we have to put up with? Surprised I’m still alive, all things considered.’

Barbara got to her feet. ‘Let me see if it’s ready.’ As she passed behind Roger, she ruffled his hair affectionately. ‘And don’t worry, dear. If I really wanted to kill you I’d have done it long ago and quite differently. A lot can happen on a farm.’

The crumble was voted garlic free and utterly delicious. Anna managed a few mouthfuls, while everyone else had seconds and then complained of feeling stuffed.

‘Let’s all go for a walk round the estate,’ Charles said. ‘Don’t worry, Rick, I’ll choose a route where there’s no chance of you being seen.’

Ed glanced at Sophie. ‘We’ll give it a miss, if you don’t mind. We’ve done enough walking for today.’

‘I’m not going either,’ Anna said, as she helped Barbara to clear the table. ‘I’ll stay behind with the boys.’

‘Nonsense, dear.’ Barbara’s tone was kind but firm. ‘You could do with the fresh air, you’re looking peaky. I can lend you a coat if you like, but you should be fine in that jumper. Roger and I will look after the boys – he can take Harry out with the dogs and I’ll play cards with Ollie.’ And she almost bundled Anna into the hall.

With a sigh of resignation, Anna knelt down to retie her shoelace. Maybe this would be a good opportunity to take Charles to one side and tell him to get his act together – for the children’s sake, at least. How
dare
he kiss her when she was asleep, and in front of Ollie?

As the others waited outside, the clean country air carried their voices to her – Lou and Henrietta’s giggles, Charles and Mona’s bickering. And Rick? He’d be shifting from foot to foot, anxious to get moving and work off that huge lunch. In France he’d wanted to walk everywhere; and that’s what they’d done, holding hands, talking, kissing …

A sudden crowing laugh behind her, a child’s weight pressing down on her back, hot little hands round her neck in a boisterous stranglehold.

‘Me go with Tee-Anna!’

Hard to speak, need to loosen Harry’s grip–

And then, cool fingers on her neck – the slightest, lightest touch – and Harry’s hands were prised away.

‘No, Harry.’ Rick’s voice, stern, uncompromising. ‘Let’s go and find your grandma.’

A grateful glance upwards – and there was Rick towering over her, Harry penned in his arms, a smile softening his words as he looked at the little boy. Harry offered no resistance, for once stunned into wide-eyed silence.

They’d gone before she could croak a thank you.

Hard to speak, still; and now hard to breathe. Hard to forget a lover’s touch. Not the brief, business-like contact of a minute ago, but those tender caresses from the past.

Chapter Eighteen

Rick held Harry close while he headed towards the kitchen. Although he told himself it was to keep the child safe, he was vaguely aware of another reason.

Something to do with Anna.

A moment ago, this little boy’s hands had been clasped around her neck – a part of her anatomy that, long ago, Rick had found irresistible. Now the same small stubby fingers were splayed like stars on his chest. Next to his heart, ironically enough. A heart that had once been hers …

The child stirred in his arms, brought him back to the present. ‘It all happened long before you were born,’ he said; and Harry stared solemnly up at him, as if he understood this was no laughing matter.

By now they’d arrived at a kitchen full of dirty dishes, but empty of people.

‘Bet Grandma’s in the garden,’ Rick went on. He bloody well hoped she was; then he could rejoin the others without going back through the house and having another close encounter in the hall.

Because, actually, it wasn’t meant to be like this; it wasn’t meant to be like this at all.

He’d bought a whole set of expensive clothes, invested in the Jag and a driver, so that he’d look the part of a man who’d made it, big time. And as long as that information reached a certain corner of Somerset, via
The Times
, or the TV, or even
Snobs & Knobs
– if such a magazine existed, her father was bound to read it – he would be satisfied. And yes, he’d prepared himself for the possibility of Anna herself turning up at one of his book signings; but he was sure he’d be able to cope with a ten-second meeting in a public place.

Instead, he’d been suffocating in the same room as her for over an hour, picking his way through a conversational minefield that was obvious to no one except her, stomaching the realisation that she was sleeping with her brother-in-law …

‘Tee-Anna hurt?’ Ah, another of Harry’s penetrating questions; the sort that could be answered in three words or three thousand, depending on how you were feeling.

Rick paused by the half-glazed door into the walled garden. Hallelujah, there was Barbara settling Ollie on a sunlounger; he’d leave Harry with her and simply follow the gravel path out of the garden and round to the front of the house.

‘Aunty Anna’s fine,’ he said briskly. He opened the door, then hesitated. How the hell did he know? He forced his brain to rewind. OK, during the meal she’d been subdued, but that was understandable around the over-exuberant Musgroves. And at one point she’d been upset, he could tell; although it gave him no pleasure to see how hard his remarks had hit her.

On the whole, though, she seemed fine – in spite of Charles’s pathetic attempt to cover up their sordid little affair. She just wasn’t the girl he remembered – the girl with golden skin, and ideals to match.

Difficult to tell which was uppermost, relief or disappointment. Masking both with a nonchalant smile, he stepped into the Musgroves’ garden and delivered Harry safely to his grandma.

Anna straightened up and leaned against the old oak bureau to collect herself. When Rick returned, she would try to behave naturally with him. Maybe touch his arm to attract his attention; laugh, as she thanked him for rescuing her from Harry’s clutches.

But the minutes passed and he didn’t return.

She felt strangely bereft, and began to hope that the others had set off without her so that she didn’t have to put on an act. No such luck; just as she was retreating to the kitchen, Henrietta flung open the front door, announced cheerfully, ‘She’s here!’ and shepherded her outside.

Anna immediately looked round for Charles; but he was already walking off with Rick, who’d obviously taken the alternative route through the garden to avoid her. Lou and Henrietta followed, heads close together, a ‘Do not disturb’ sign all but visible. This left Mona on her own; as soon as she took Anna’s arm and gave a gloating little laugh, Anna knew that trouble was brewing. If only Ollie had kept quiet …

‘If you think you’ve got a chance with Rick, you can forget it,’ Mona said. ‘I just asked him if you’d changed much and he said “Yes, and not for the better”.’ She paused, to let the words sink in. ‘So it looks like he’s all Henrietta’s.’

Anna swallowed. Was Mona telling the truth, or was she getting revenge for what she would see as her public humiliation earlier? And if she
was
telling the truth – then OK, Anna was not the same person, and never could be after ten years … So maybe Rick had a point; but it still hurt to hear it.

Aloud she said slowly, ‘Henrietta? He seems more interested in Lou.’

‘I don’t think there’s much to choose between them, as far as he’s concerned. But Henrietta needs to set her sights a lot higher than Kyle McIntyre. I’ve been telling Charles for months, there’s no way she should be sleeping with one of her father’s farmhands.’

‘He’s hardly that.’

Mona ignored this and went on, ‘I’m going to give her a piece of my mind, right now–’

‘I don’t think they want to be disturbed–’

‘Tough, you watch me.’

She marched up to the two sisters and wedged herself between them. Immediately, Lou ran forward and slipped her arm through Rick’s; a few moments later, Charles walked purposefully on ahead, leaving Lou and Rick on their own. Anna noticed that he was leading them to the estate farm, where Kyle McIntyre was no doubt hard at work; and, in an instant, she understood the hidden agendas. Charles and Lou wanted Henrietta with Kyle, so that Kyle would stay on as farm manager and Lou could pair off with Rick. Mona wanted Henrietta with Rick, so that she wouldn’t be with Kyle.

And Rick? What – who – did he want? He certainly didn’t want Anna Elliot. And yet there was a time when he didn’t want anyone – anything – else. Or so he’d said.

She shivered. The sky had clouded over and the once bright fields and hedgerows were a dull patchwork of greens and browns. As she trudged along the tree-lined road to the farm, leaves drifted past to carpet the ground in swirls of copper and gold. She’d always loved autumn, associating its blaze of colour with the hopes and challenges of a new academic year. But today she saw only the onset of winter.

In front of her, the drama was playing out, a farce and a tragedy at the same time. Mona had realised where they were heading and was holding on to Henrietta for dear life. Charles came back and tried to pull Henrietta away, his face flushed and angry. Their voices blurred with the breeze, but Anna could fill in the words and detect the fast-burning fuse of emotions behind them. Henrietta slumped between them like a rag doll until, at last, Charles managed to wrench her from Mona’s grasp.

Anna looked round for Lou and Rick. They were standing a little distance from the road, either side of an old wooden stile set into a high, winding hedge. As if on cue, Lou stepped on to the crossbar at the top of the stile and jumped into his arms. He held her to him, turned his head very slightly and stared straight at Anna. She was too far away to read his expression, but she knew it wouldn’t be friendly. And then – did he make the first move, or was it Lou?

There was something horribly fascinating about seeing them kiss – as if Anna was watching her own past, brought vividly and unexpectedly back to life. But closing her eyes was not an option; darkness would merely intensify the memories …

Eventually, she tore her gaze away and stumbled on towards the farm, dimly aware of Charles hurrying Henrietta into the barn some hundred yards ahead. Next thing she knew, Mona had barred her path and grabbed her by the wrist.

‘Did you
see
that? He nearly pulled her arm out of its bloody socket to get her away from me! I’ve had it with him, I really have. I’m going to leave him, I’m going to leave the whole effing family and go back to Kellynch with the boys.’ She dug her nails into Anna’s flesh. ‘You can move into the Manor and make him happy after all these years. I’ll go and tell him, shall I?’ And before Anna could stop her, she stormed off.

The last thing Anna wanted to do was follow her. Instead, she huddled by the hedge; out of the breeze, but not too close to the entwined hawthorn, bramble and hazel in case she snagged her new jumper. She would stay here until the others returned, then take Charles to one side for a private word; or maybe she’d wait for him at the Cottage. Whatever she did, no one would care. In fact, if she hadn’t needed to speak to Charles, she’d have walked back to the Great House to say her goodbyes and driven straight home to Bath.

Then, on the other side of the hedge, she heard voices: Lou and Rick. They paused almost directly behind her.

‘Looks like they’ve all gone to the farm,’ Rick said.

‘Thank God for that. You know,’ Lou’s tone hardened, ‘Henrietta’s been going out with Kyle for two years now, but she still won’t commit. If I were her, I’d have moved into that farmhouse with him and made it work – or at least found out that it didn’t. You only live once, don’t you?’

‘That’s always been my philosophy.’

‘Right, but it’s certainly not Henrietta’s. If I hadn’t gone on and on at her today, she’d never have called on Kyle. She’s too used to waiting for him to come running, even though I’ve told her he won’t do that forever.’

‘Good job she’s got you to keep her on track.’ His voice was warm with approval.

‘I suppose I’m a typical older sister. Isn’t yours like that?’

‘When I let her.’

Lou giggled, then gave a little sigh of resignation. ‘I’m not sure she likes me.’

‘She’s just over-protective,’ he said, curtly. ‘I wouldn’t be surprised if she and Ed were parked at the top of that field, watching us through their binoculars.’

Another giggle. ‘They’re always out together. Dad says they take a thermos of tea everywhere, like a couple of pensioners.’

‘I think it’s good that they enjoy each other’s company.’ He was on the defensive now. ‘They were quite adventurous when they were younger, it’s hardly surprising that they prefer the quiet life. Although you wouldn’t think so, the way Ed drives that old Land Rover – one day they’ll end up in a ditch, or worse.’

‘I’d rather end up in a ditch with the man I love than be without him.’ A pause; then, ‘Cheer up – it might never happen.’

‘What might never happen?’

‘Whatever it is you’re thinking about. And look – we’re in a ditch right now!’ Lou’s voice dropped to a slow, seductive murmur. ‘See if this cheers you up.’

Silence, interrupted by Lou again. ‘Mmm, that was … What if your sister’s looking at us through her binoculars?’

His voice, low and ragged. ‘Let’s give her something really worth watching, then.’

Another silence, much longer.

Anna tensed; just because she couldn’t actually see them kissing didn’t make it any easier. He wasn’t wasting any time, was he? Shelley one day, Lou the next; unless, of course, the Shelley relationship had been over before he came to England. She chewed her lip, desperate to escape but terrified to move, in case she made a noise. The humiliation of being caught would be worse – if only slightly – than the agony of listening, and imagining, and remembering …

A sharp intake of breath; then Rick said, ‘No, Lou, the others might come back.’ But his rebuke was gentle, almost apologetic, and he went on in a bantering tone, ‘Here, have a blackberry, or a nut. Isn’t this a hazelnut? You know, most people are like blackberries, they turn to pulp at the slightest pressure. You’re not, though. You’re like this nut, not easily crushed – that’s a compliment, by the way. Go on, take it as a souvenir.’

‘The only nuts I’m interested in are yours, Rick Wentworth.’

And, for the first time in ten years, Anna heard his laugh; deep and rich and unhurried, as if he’d just heard the funniest thing in the world. She used to call it his bedroom laugh, and once he’d asked if that was a threat or a promise, and she’d told him it was anything he wanted it to be. In response, he’d kissed her over and over again; until she was breathless, and he wasn’t laughing any more …

Now he said, ‘We’d better go and find the others before they come and find us.’

‘Actually, I’d quite like them to find us,’ Lou replied. ‘I can just imagine Mona’s face.’

‘Why do you say that?’

‘She’s a stupid, stuck-up cow. She doesn’t think Kyle’s good enough for a Musgrove and she’s hoping you’ll be Henrietta’s reason to drop him. So you and me getting together isn’t part of her little plan at all.’

‘Hmm, maybe I should tell her I’m quite happy to have both of you.’

A half-hearted giggle. ‘Don’t even think about it, Henrietta and I aren’t very good at sharing.’

‘Is Mona?’

‘What do you mean?’ Lou sounded puzzled.

‘Doesn’t she have to share Charles?’ His voice was dark with condemnation. ‘With her sister?’

Anna’s eyes widened. What the hell–?

‘In a way, you’re right,’ Lou said thoughtfully. ‘Charles hasn’t completely moved on from Anna, although he’s a lot better than he was.’

‘Moved on?’ A pause. ‘Were they – did she go out with Charles?’

‘Yes, they met at Oxford. Before that, we didn’t know the Elliot girls very well, even though Kellynch is so near. They were either away at boarding school or moving in far grander circles than gymkhana events and the Young Farmers’ Club. Anyway, Charles was in his last year at Oxford and Anna had just started. When she dumped him, he was devastated. He went out with Mona on the rebound and kept breaking up with her. But, in the end, she got pregnant and he married her.’ Lou added dryly, ‘He’s been regretting it ever since, as you must have noticed. They’re like chalk and cheese, he’d have been much better off with Anna.’

Anna thought that Lou made it sound so simple: a short sequence of cause and effect, with all the heartache erased – hers, Charles’s, even Mona’s, when she first knew she was pregnant.

‘Why did she dump him?’ Rick said abruptly.

‘Well, Mum and Dad think it was Lady Russell – or Minty, as the chosen few call her. Anna’s her favourite goddaughter, the child she never had, and Minty’s an awful snob. So, although Charles was just about good enough to make an honest woman of Mona, Minty never considered him worthy of Anna.’

‘And now?’

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