Picture Me Naked (Stoddard Art School Series) (28 page)

“Tell him the next time I see him, I’m kissing him full on the mouth.” Zee was lying naked, facedown on a soft table. She’d been creamed and rubbed and buffed. A gentle woman had placed smooth stones down the center of her back. Toenails were pinked and eyebrows were shaped and all sorts of things had been massaged and pampered. It was the perfect ending to their perfect weekend. The heavy warm rocks on her back were melting any remaining tension from her muscles. Zee groaned with pleasure.

“Do we really have to leave?” Leah pouted.

“As wonderful as this has been, yes. I miss Jagger.”

“Jagger, Jagger, Jagger. You’ve got it bad.”

“I know.” Zee sighed.

“I’m so jealous.” Leah was finished with her massage, and wrapped in a lush terry robe. An attendant handed her a tall glass of chilled water with a slice of cucumber floating on top. “Happy for you, of course, but wish it was me sleeping with Mr. Gorgeous.”

“You have Ted.”

“Ted’s a beast.” She shrugged one shoulder. “Maybe I shouldn’t complain. He’s a good guy under all his craziness. He’s loyal as a Great Dane and keeps talking about how great it will be to grow old together and still suck face in the kitchen when we’re ninety.”

“Now
I’m
jealous. When I’m ninety, all I’ll have is a wistful smile no one will quite understand.”

“You don’t know that.”

“Yes, I do. What Jagger and I have is like a Fourth of July sparkler. Brilliant and exciting, but when it’s done, it’s done.”

“But…”

“No, no buts. I knew this going in. I’m doing my best to stay practical about it. It’s good to know that when the time comes, I’ll have you and a barrel of those margaritas we drank last night to drown my sorrows.”

Leah shook her head. “I know that’s what you say. But I’ve seen the way you look at him. You haven’t talked about anything else this whole weekend. You’re being way too pragmatic about this, even for you.”

“If I don’t hang on to reality, I’ll crumble.”

“Beg him to stay.”

“You don’t understand.” Zee nodded a thanks to the masseuse, rose, and tugged her robe on.

“What’s to understand? You love him. He loves you. You should be together.”

“We are together.”

“Forever.”

“There is no forever.” Zee sipped at her water. “I never imagined that I could be so happy and so miserable all at the same time. I had no idea I would ever meet someone like him or feel like this. After Ed, I’d given up hope that I would ever have what you and Ted have. And I was really okay with that, you know? I had my work. I had my quiet little life.”

“That sure as hell sounds like the old Zee talking. What about now?”

“Now?” She shrugged. “I see Jagger as an unexpected gift. A shiny-wrapped box of bliss that was shipped to me by mistake. He was never supposed to be mine. I’ve known that from the beginning.”

“So what are you going to do?”

“I’m going to love him, forever.”

“Didn’t you just say there was no forever?”

“Then I’ll just love him for all my todays and the day after that.”

Chapter Thirty-Five

Jagger whipped open the door as soon as he heard Zee’s key in the lock and pulled her into his arms. “Welcome home, beautiful.”

“Jagger! God, I missed you.” She dropped her bags, wrapped her arms around him, and kissed him soundly.

He laughed when her hands went to the first button of his pants. “You did miss me.”

“So much. Was it only two days? Wait until you see the little surprise I bought you. I’ll give you a hint. It’s black and lacy and will look great when you strip it off me and drop it on the floor.” She picked up one of the bags at her feet and began searching.

He laughed. “Wait. I have a surprise for you, too.”

“You do? What kind of a surprise?”

He pulled a long slip of white silk from his back pocket. “The blindfolded kind of surprise.”

“Oooh. I’m loving this already.” She squirmed in his arms.

“Do you trust me?”

“Of course.”

“Good, put this on, and no peeking.”

Zee set her bag to one side and helped him put the blindfold on her. He was bursting with anticipation and nervous energy. Hell, he’d been running on adrenaline and horrible coffee for the last two days. He nuzzled his favorite spot on her neck. “I’ve missed you more than you know.”

“Mmmm. I missed you, too.”

He took her hand, laid a kiss in the palm and tucked it into the crook of his arm. “Come with me. Are you sure you can’t see anything?”

Zee giggled with delight and clutched his arm. “No, I can’t see anything. I’m so excited. I love surprises.”

“We’re almost there.” He opened the sliding door to the roof.

“You aren’t thinking of tossing me off the roof, are you?”

“’Course not. You trust me, remember.” He helped her over the threshold and brought her to a stop two steps later. Jagger released her arm and stepped away from her.

“Jagger! Don’t leave me!” Her hands searched for him.

“It’s okay. I’m right here.” He held his breath. “Okay, go ahead. Take off your blindfold.” Zee pulled the blindfold down. Her eyes went wide as she gasped.

Jagger had spent the past two and a half days transforming her roof into a private garden. He’d filled the space with plants and trees. Put in a seating area, even an arbor. Flower boxes and pots overflowed with every color he could find.

He’d covered the black asphalt with the cream colored, eco-friendly covering Steve recommended, and topped that with rugs scattered here and there. Close to two wide chairs sat a raised copper fire basin he’d set on a circle of stacked bricks. A small pile of firewood waited nearby. Lanterns and standing heaters stood here and there as well.

But his favorite part, by far was the four-posted structure in the back corner. He’d hung panels of sheer fabric that caught even the slightest breeze, and surrounded a hammock big enough for two.

The sun was setting and the softening of the sky backlit everything. He couldn’t have planned it better.

“Jagger,” Zee gasped in a whisper.

“Do you like it?”

The look of amazement on her face as she looked around was his answer. “H-how did you do this?”

“I got up close and personal with that rickety elevator of yours. You’re right, it’s a bloody death trap.” He swept behind her and wrapped his arms about her. “I wanted to do something special to celebrate your opening and to show you how much I’ve come to love you.”

“I don’t know what to say.”

“Say you like it.”

“I
love
it. Oh, Jagger, it’s gorgeous. I can’t believe you did all this in just two days.”

“Two and a half actually. I had a little help. Roger Hickey, the gardener from the estate gave me a hand. Steve helped me find some of the hardware and the paint. You pulled out of the parking lot with Leah on Friday, and I headed for the garden center.”

“It’s like I’m standing in a dream.” Zee stepped out of his embrace and walked about looking at everything. “It’s amazing.”

“Now you can enjoy your roof anytime you want. There’s shelter from the sun and the rain. There’s heat when it’s cold. Hickey says all the plants are weather hardy and in the winter, they move into the shelter back there. The pots all have rollers.”

He slipped his arm around her waist and kissed her hair. “You can drink your tea out here in the mornings. We can lie naked in the shade so your lovely veranda doesn’t burn to a crisp. Make love under the stars. It’s our own Eden.” He pointed to a small glass-topped table with champagne chilling next to a plate of chocolates. “I even got your favorite champagne.” He wanted to remind her of their champagne night from a few weeks ago.

“It’s so beautiful. You didn’t have to do this. It’s too much.”

“I wanted to.”

Zee stood stunned. “I never dreamed it could look like this. This is the most amazing thing anyone’s ever done for me. It must have cost a fortune.”

“Don’t worry about that.”

“But, how did you…? Oh my God!” Zee spun around. “You spent your money for Europe?”

“Yes, I did.” He boasted. “Every last copper.”

“But what about France? What about London?”

He reached for her. “None of that matters now, Zee. I wanted to do this for you. For us.” He smirked at her. “I guess I’m stuck here now. I’ll have to stay with you, won’t I? Isn’t that great?”

“
Stuck?
No!” Zee pushed away from him.

“No?”

“I don’t want that. I don’t want you to be
stuck
here!”

“I was kidding, Zee. Wrong word. I don’t feel stuck.”

“But you are! Don’t you see? Like your father got stuck. You were going to see the world. Y-you had a plan. You
promised
your Da.”

“I know I did, but that was before. I’ll keep my promise.” He shrugged. “Eventually. But now, I want to be here with you.” Zee was looking at him with a different kind of shock now. He tried to joke. “Hell, my mum will think it’s a ripper I’ve been roped down, she might even call off the firing squad.”

Jagger kept trying to pull her back into his embrace, but she was getting more and more upset. She put a hand over her heart and started to hyperventilate.

“
Roped down?
Is that what this is? Am I just a way to save your neck?” She pushed away from him again.

“No! Of course not. Why are you getting so upset?”

“You said it yourself. You’re
stuck
! You’ve put your entire future into terracotta pots!” She gasped for breath. “You might not get another chance, Jagger. Don’t you understand that?”

“No, I don’t understand. I thought you’d be happy. I thought you wanted me to stay.”

“Not like this!” Zee swept her hand. “Not roped down like a calf at a rodeo! I can’t believe you traded in your dreams for a roof!”

“What the hell are you talking about? You’re not making sense. You said you loved it.”

“I do.”

“You’ve got a bloody odd way of showing it.”

“Jagger…” Her mouth worked but no words came out. A gap cracked between them and Jagger could feel it widening by the minute. “I…” She rubbed the spot between her eyebrows. “Jagger, I’m just so stressed about the show and—”

“The show, the show, the show.” His anger finally snapped. “Do you know how many times we’ve talked about your damn show in the last three weeks? You’re obsessed. It’s just
one
show, Zee. There’ll be others.”

“Just a show?” Zee’s jaw dropped. “This is my big break. Daniel Bruce doesn’t
do
second chances. You have no idea what’s at stake here. This is what I’ve been busting my ass for the last six years. Pardon me if you don’t understand what that’s like. How could you when you’ve never stayed in one place long enough t-to…”

“To what? Matter?”

“No. Understand commitment. Understand responsibility.”

“
I
don’t understand responsibility? What do you call the last three years? A joy ride?” Jagger threw up a hand. “Forget it. Never mind.” White-hot rage surged through him. “What the hell was I thinking? I should have my head examined. I’ll never learn. Just when I think I have you crazy sheilas figured out, you remind me that you all come from another planet.” Anger radiated from him in sparks.

“I’m not the crazy one that spent my future on potted plants. Did I ask you to do all this? Did I ask you to spend all your money? I don’t need all of this to know you love me. I don’t need—”

He held up his hand to stop her. “That’s right, I forgot, you don’t need anything. Especially from me. You’ve been trying to push me away from the very beginning! You won’t come with me, you obviously don’t want me to stick around. I get it now.” Jagger slapped his forehead with the heel of his hand. “What an
idiot
I am. I should have known when you went off and took care of Zeigler by yourself, you didn’t need me. You didn’t then, and you sure as hell don’t need me now. Admit it, you don’t want me around because you’re afraid I’ll screw things up for you. You’re scared I’ll change your tidy little life.” Jagger’s planted his hands on his hips.

“Well, what did you expect from a crazy sheila?” Zee shot back. “You’ve changed everything else, why not my whole life. You just have to sweep through and change everything don’t you? You’ve done all you can to turn me into something I’m not. Hell, I’m wearing underwear that’s nothing more than butt floss! But I guess you couldn’t change how crazy I am, right?” She flung her arm at two and a half days of sweat and toil. “Now I’ve got freaking Central Park on my roof!”

His jaw felt like stone. Zee crossed her arms and glared at him. “You know I was doing fine before you sauntered into my life with your perfect body and rearranged everything. Maybe I was happier not being with anyone.”

Her words were like a bucket of ice water. “I don’t bloody believe what I’m hearing. Maybe you need to be with someone who’ll treat you like crap. I understand Ed Zeigler is still on the market.”

Zee gasped. “At least Ed Zeigler only wanted to change the size of my boobs!”

“Well, darlin’.” Jagger felt something beyond rage and pain. He felt numb. He couldn’t look at her. He was done. “I’ll make this real easy for you.”

Chapter Thirty-Six

The sound of the door slamming punched Zee in the chest. She ran through the living room to stop him, but couldn’t bring herself to chase after him. She was going to be ill. Zee put her face in her hands and sobbed.
What have I done!

“He’s leaving! You have to stop him!”

“I can’t, Nana.”

“You can’t or you won’t? Why did you do that? What’s the matter with you? You know something, one of these days you are going to get your wish, young lady. You’re going to end up a bitter old hermit and be all alone. Maybe it’s high time you started to have some trust in people. Trust in yourself. You were so happy. He loved you! I don’t understand how you could just throw that away!”

“Shut up!” Zee put her hands over her ears. “Please. Stop! I can’t listen to another one of your damn lectures. Why do I even listen to you? You’re dead.
Dead
! You don’t exist!” A sob caught in Zee’s throat. She snatched the ragged teacup off its shelf. “I pieced you back together after you died. Just like this damn cup. I made you up!” Zee threw the cup with all her strength against the wall and watched as it splintered in an explosion of tiny shards.