Pleasure Me (34 page)

“I’m well enough. I have business affairs that need attention, and my presence here . . . I’ve been enough of a burden.”

“Why would you think yourself a burden?” Her violet gaze narrowed at him with an astute look he recognized.

“Do you deny that your routine has been disrupted over the last few days due to caring for me?” He met her gaze unflinchingly, but it was clear she was able to read him better than he realized. God help him if she were to guess his feelings.

“I see.” She paused for a second then shook her head. “This has to do with my knowing the truth about you, doesn’t it?”

“I don’t know what you’re talking about,” he said quietly, grateful that she hadn’t stumbled upon the real reason he needed to put some distance between them.

“You know exactly what I’m saying,” she said with exasperation. “I’m disappointed you could even
think
I would reject you simply because nature made you different from other men.”

“I don’t recall saying anything to that regard. However, we both know it’s an issue that bears consideration.” He scowled at her. It was true. There were two hurdles to overcome when it came to their happiness. His defect and her unwillingness to see that age was a state of mind, not a number.

“Does it? I see it differently.” The moment her hand came to rest on his stomach he went rigid. Sweet Jesus. Whenever she touched him, she lit a fire inside him that threatened to consume him. “Shall I tell you what I saw the other night when I undressed you?”

“It would change nothing,” he replied stoically as he acknowledged he wanted to be whole, if only for her sake.

“I disagree. It changes everything between us, and I think it’s a conversation that is long overdue.”

Her fingers reached for the buttons beneath the flap of his trousers, forcing him to grab her hand. The steady look she gave him made him pull in a sharp breath, which in turn immediately filled his senses with her sensual fragrance. The scent combined with the determined look in her expression made his throat tighten painfully. God, how he loved her when she looked at him like that.

“If you feel the need to prove something to me,” he rasped, “don’t.”

“The only thing I wish to
prove
to you is that your uncle was wrong. Your body is a work of art.”

She gently unlocked his fingers holding her wrist prisoner then undid the first and second buttons of his trousers. His traitorous body reacted with astonishing speed. He shook his head in protest, and her fingers pressed against his lips.

“No. Don’t say anything. Just listen to me,” she said as her fingers continued to undo his trousers. “When I removed your clothing the other night, I was appalled by all the bruises marring your incredible body. But not even the ugliness of your injuries could hide what I’d always known. You are beautiful.”

He grunted with disbelief before his heart slammed into his chest. She looked at him for a moment before she exposed him completely. It was like a sledgehammer hitting his chest as her fingers splayed open his trousers to reveal his erection. Christ Jesus, he wanted to believe her.

“I love looking at you—touching you,” she whispered, her forefinger circling the edge of his cock’s mushroom cap before applying an exquisite pressure to the thick vein directly beneath its rim. “When I look at you, I want to please you. Do you know how I want to please you, Garrick?”

“How?” he asked roughly. His question made her lips curve upward in that mysterious smile of hers. It sent fire churning its way through his veins until he wanted to jerk her skirts up and settle her honeyed core over his cock.

“Like this.”

Somehow he’d known what she intended to do, and the minute she bent her head toward his rod the air disappeared from his lungs. The heat of her tongue trailed a fiery path from the base of him upward to swirl around the tip of him. The touch made him draw in a sharp hiss of air.

He’d heard his friends talking about a woman tending to one’s cock, but he’d never imagined it would be like this. It was a touch unlike anything he’d ever dreamed of. One moment the fiery stroke of her tongue caressed his rod then in almost the same instant she cooled his skin with a puff of air. It was an amazing sensation that hardened him until he ached with pleasure.

“Am I pleasing you, Garrick?”

“Yes.” His response was little more than a guttural sound in his ears.

“And this?” The heat of her tongue blazed its way down to his ballock before her mouth engulfed it.
Bloody hell.
She had to ask? Of course it pleased him.

“Yes,” he rasped, and he groaned as she sucked on his ballock.

An instant later his hips jerked upward as she made a low humming sound that vibrated his sac. Christ Jesus. Just when he thought the woman had taught him everything he needed to know about pleasure, she managed to do something else that told him how little he really knew. An incredible sensation stretched through him until his cock expanded and hardened more than he ever thought possible.

As she hummed, her hand wrapped around him like a gentle vise. The stroke of her hand combined with the vibrations on his ballock had him gripping the sides of the chair as if that would control the pleasure. God help him, but the woman’s skill was taking him to places he’d never imagined. A groan rolled out of him as her hand tightened on him. The friction her stroke created almost made him spew his seed.

“Sweet . . . heart,” he choked out. “Sweetheart, if you . . . ahh . . . don’t . . . stop . . . I won’t . . .”

She immediately lifted her head, but her hand continued to slide up and down his erection at a slow, yet steady pace. His senses clouding his head, he tried to focus his gaze on her features. There was a smile of gentle triumph on her face.

“Do you believe me when I say you’re beautiful?”

The question made him tremble. Could he believe that? After Bertha’s rejection, after all the times his uncle had reminded him that he was only half a man and even Wycombe’s insinuations—all of it—was it possible they’d been wrong? He desperately wanted to believe her. Conflicted with emotion, he shook his head. She was trained to please a man, and she’d made it her goal to teach him how to make love to a woman. Her gaze narrowed slightly at him.

“I told you I’m not in the habit of lying,” she said in a firm, yet soft voice. “Your body is a work of art only God could have made.”

“He made a mistake,” he rasped as the memory of Bertha’s disgust lashed through him.

“No, see how hard and thick you are.” Her hand slid up and down in a swift stroke that tugged a groan up out of his chest. “You’re beautiful. Don’t believe what your uncle has told you over the years.”

“It’s not—”

“You’ve believed your uncle’s lies for so long, you can’t see yourself the way I do. The way any woman in her right mind would.” Her thumb rubbed against the pulsing vein that rested just beneath the cap of his erection. It pulled another sharp breath from him. “Your body is a wonderful specimen of male beauty. And your cock is one of your most beautiful attributes. Just looking at it makes me ache for you.”

She bent her head again and stroked him with her tongue from the base of his rod to the tip. The seductive caress pulled a wild shudder from him. God, he wasn’t sure how much more of this he could take. He reached for her, but she threaded her fingers through his hands and held them away from her.

“Your uncle was wrong.”

As she lowered her head again, he expected to feel her tongue laving the length of him, but when she took his cock into her mouth, he barely managed to bite back a shout of surprise and pleasure. God help him, she was determined to undo him completely. Her mouth on him was hotter than anything he’d ever experienced in his life.

The exotic scent of her wafted up into his nose, heightening the intensity of the pleasure she was giving him. His hands reached for her, his fingers threading through her beautiful, silky hair. Damnation, the woman was hell-bent on driving him insane with these slow, maddening strokes of his rod.

He wanted her to move faster, but when he applied a gentle pressure to her head, she resisted his silent plea. Hot and moist, her lips clutched the tip of him as her tongue swirled around the rim before her mouth suddenly engulfed him in one swift move. It sent a rush of pleasure shooting through him, and he released a guttural sound at the intensity of it.

Just as quickly as she’d taken him into her mouth, she began to suck on him with increased speed. Watching her caress his cock was the most erotic sight he’d ever seen. God, her mouth was a wicked hot vise around him. There were no words to describe the sensations rolling through him. The startling touch of her fingers on his ballock made him draw in a sharp breath. Gently, her thumb massaged his sac as her mouth tightened around his erection. A familiar pressure built inside him, and he groaned.

“Stop sweetheart . . . I can’t hold . . .”

His words only made her suck harder, and the moist friction gripping his rod was one of the most amazing things he’d ever felt. Another guttural sound passed his lips, and with a shout he exploded in the white heat of her mouth.

“
Christ Jesus
,” he cried out as she swallowed his seed and sucked on him as he throbbed between her lips. He was swimming in an ocean of blind pleasure as wave after wave of incredible sensations crested over him. It was impossible to think. His body was in complete control as it sent one blistering message of delight after another to his brain. And still she continued to caress him with her mouth. Wild shudders rippled through him at her slowing strokes, and he shuddered again as she slowly let him slip out of her mouth. She sat upright and stared at him with a small smile of satisfaction.

“Do you believe me now when I say I think you’re beautiful? Especially your cock,” she whispered.

“Yes,” he rasped. Arguing with her was something he didn’t have the strength for. Not when it was taking every bit of willpower he possessed not to say he loved her. “Thank you for . . . for . . .”

“You’re welcome.”

There wasn’t one iota of amusement in her voice or expression, but he still felt like a schoolboy with his first woman. He grimaced at the thought. Damnation, in many ways he still was, and it would take a great many more lessons to achieve the skill he needed to seduce her—please her. And pleasing her was what he intended to do.

Somehow he’d find a way to make her love him. As a courtesan she would know better than to grow emotionally attached to a lover. But if there was one thing he knew about himself it was his determination. When he set his mind to do something, he did it. His fingers curled into his palms. He’d make her fall in love with him. If it were the last thing he did, he’d make her see they belonged together. He didn’t have a choice. It was a simple acceptance of his fate.

His gaze met hers, and she tilted her head slightly as she studied him with a puzzled frown. She’d admired his body, but he was the beast to her beauty. He reached out to cup her face. When she looked at him like that, he wanted to carry her off to some remote spot in the country. Far away from the gossips and wagging tongues who tried to hurt her.

A place where he could indulge himself listening for her laughter or the sweet music of her voice. Somewhere quiet, like Chiddingstone Manor, where he could savor every smile, scent, and touch for years to come. And the last thing he wanted to do was leave her.

“It will be hard to leave you.” The moment he spoke, an odd emotion flew across her features and vanished almost as quickly as it appeared. His heart jumped. Had that been fear? Was she afraid that he meant to leave her for good?

“I cannot imagine why,” she said with a soft laugh that rang hollow in his ears. “I’m certain you’ve been bored these past two days with nothing more to do but lay in bed.”

“I won’t deny that I’ve missed my morning routine and workout at the Club, but I will miss waking up with you in my arms.”

“And I shall miss you, too.”

Although Ruth’s tone was light, her words seemed forced. He studied her carefully. She’d said she’d miss him, but something about her tone bothered him. Her gaze darted away from his as she busied herself with buttoning his trousers and restoring his appearance to a more circumspect one. Despite her matter-of-fact manner, there was a nervousness about her that made him frown.

“What’s wrong, sweetheart?” He caught her chin in his hand and forced her to look at him. For the briefest of moments, he saw fear darkening her eyes.

“Nothing at all,” she replied with a bright smile that he was certain was forced. She sprang to her feet and offered him her hand. “Come, I’ll have Simmons ready the carriage while you pack your things.”

He accepted her hand and got to his feet. She started to walk away, but he immediately tugged her back to him and pulled her into his arms. Her eyes were wide with surprise as she stared up at him. But there was something else. An emotion he couldn’t decipher, and it struck a note of fear inside him. He’d believed her when she’d said his physical flaws were inconsequential.

And the way she’d ministered to his cock with such great fanfare had helped shore up that belief. But she was hiding something from him, and suddenly he wasn’t sure of her anymore. Courtesans were skilled lovers
and
actresses. Had she been playing him for a fool? Had she simply told him what she thought he wanted to hear? They were questions he didn’t want to learn the answers to. He struggled to keep his voice empty of the fear twisting its way through him.

“I know you, Ruth. Something’s troubling you, and I want to know what it is.”

“I told you. There’s—”

“Goddamn it. Tell me,” he growled with frustration and a growing fear that he might have met the one thing in his life that he couldn’t control. The one objective he couldn’t obtain. Her heart. “Are you so eager to see the back of me—now that you’ve proven you can suck my cock without flinching?”