Powder Blu (6 page)

I could barely contain myself as I watched Cordell unbutton his Levi 501s. The anticipation was killing me. He pulled his jeans and boxers down and to my surprise he had one of the smallest dicks I'd ever seen in my life. I was almost in a state of shock as I stared down at that tiny shit.

“What's wrong?” Cordell asked, sensing my hesitation.

“Nothin', ain't nothin' wrong,” I stammered, disappointed.

“Well come put yo' mouth on it then,” he said, assisting with pulling me over to him.

I still couldn't believe how tiny Cordell's dick was as I closed my eyes and wrapped my lips around it. It had to be his money that had these girls flipping out over him, 'cause he was certainly slacking in the dick department. I was so disappointed. In order to even act like I was enjoying what I was doing, I had to pretend that Cordell was Budz. Whatever I was doing must have been working because Cordell was enjoying it way too much.

“Come ride me,” he said.

Wanting to get this entire ordeal over with, I climbed over onto his lap and slid down on his pole. He quickly began humping.

“You love this dick don't you?” he asked with his eyes closed tight, while caressing my back.

“Yessss,” I moaned while rolling my eyes to the top of my head.

“It's big ain't it?” he moaned.

No, this nigga did not just ask me that,
I thought. I wanted to laugh so badly, but to keep his ego intact, I played along. “Yessss, baby, it's so big,” I lied while twisting my lips.

After a few more humps, Cordell exploded all up inside of me. I waited impatiently for him to stop shaking and climbed off of his lap.

“You satisfied?” he asked, in a cocky tone.

“Ummmm huh,” I replied, hoping he didn't catch the sarcasm in my voice.

“You got some good pussy,” he said, as he pulled up his clothes.

I wish I could say the same,
I thought as I got dressed. “Thanks.”

Cordell wiped the sweat from his forehead, picked up his blunt and lit it. He took a few pulls before starting the car. I was so glad when we pulled off. I wanted to get as far away from this little-dick nigga as possible. I couldn't wait to tell Nikki and Sierra about this preemie-ass nigga. I sat quietly while looking out the window the entire ride to Nikki's house as Cordell bragged about his money, cars, and clothes. I thought I rolled my eyes so much during his entire conversation I could have sworn my right eye got stuck up in my head a few times.

I was so relieved when we turned onto Nikki's street I could have jumped for joy. My joy instantly faded when we pulled up in front of her house and her porch was full of niggas drinking on forties.

“Can I see you again?” Cordell looked over at me and asked.

“Yep,” I said, hitting the button on the side of the door watching it open and getting out.

“What's yo' number?” he asked, grabbing his cell phone so he could program it in.

I quickly rambled off the number to Arnie's barbecue spot on Eighty-fifth and 147th while grabbing my backpack out the back seat.

“A'iiight, ma, I'll hit you later on.” He smiled.

“Okay,” I said with a fake smile before turning to walk away.

Cordell closed his door and pulled off.

I shook my head as I headed up Nikki's walk.

“Okay, bitch, I see you,” Sierra said smiling. “You finally got you some of Cordell.”

“How was it?” Nikki asked, smiling as well before taking a pull from a blunt someone had passed her.

“Bitch, pass me the blunt first,” I said, shaking my head in disgust.

After they released me from the county, I didn't even take the time to go check on my house; I had the taxi take me straight to O'Hare International Airport, hopped straight on a plane, and flew to Miami. I didn't let anyone know I was out of jail, not even my mom. I needed time to think and get my mind right. I was the “man” in this dope game and if I planned on staying on top, I had to make sure all my ducks were in a row. My squad was air tight, my connect was showing mad love with his prices; the only thing that was missing in my life was someone to help me take my empire to the next level. After my week vacation, I decided to resurface to let them niggas know that the boss was back on the scene and I was about to hustle with a vengeance. I didn't have time to play no games; I was taking any nigga out who got in my way from building my brand, flat out!

After touching down back in my hometown and even before tracking down my soldiers to collect my dough, I headed straight over to Nikki's house to see what was going on in my hood. One thing I could count on with Nikki was she was sure to keep me up to date with everything that was going on. She knew so much, I had started thinking she was the feds. She knew who was fucking who, who was snitching, who was about to get knocked, and anything else you needed to know. I never knew how she found out and didn't care. She was my own personal newscaster.

“What's up, Nik?” I smiled as I walked in her front door without knocking.

“What's up, Budz?” She smiled widely, standing up from the couch walking over to give me a big hug. “When you get out, nigga?”

“Today,” I lied.

“That's wassup.” She continued to smile.

“So what's been goin' on while a nigga been locked up?” I asked, cutting to the chase.

“Sit y'all's asses down,” she yelled into the other room as her kids made hella noise. “Shit, where should I start,” she asked, shaking her head.

“From the beginning,” I said while moving a pile of dirty clothes over, taking a seat on the couch and listening as she filled me in on what was going on. I had already heard some of the stories she was telling me while I was locked up. I didn't know why it was but niggas in the joint heard shit way before most niggas on the streets. I had already heard the one about Blu out here fucking everything moving and out here making dumb money selling dope, but I didn't believe it 'cause niggas was always making up shit, but Nikki just confirmed it was true. She then went on and told me about some nigga named Black from Trinidad who was trying to take over Chicago. I heard his name mentioned a few times in the walls, but I didn't know he was trying to replace me. The more Nikki talked about Black, and how much money he was clocking, the madder I got. I couldn't believe a nigga had enough heart to come and try to take over my city. Chicago belonged to Budz! There was no way I was about to let this shit go down! This nigga was gon' pay, either with his money or his life; either way was okay with me. After not being able to listen to any more, I stood up.

“Where you 'bouta go?” Nikki asked, desperately, standing up as well.

“I'm 'bouta go handle some business. I'll be back later on,” I said, heading to the door.

“You promise?”

“Yeah, I got chu.” I chuckled.

“I'll be waitin',” Nikki said, grabbing me by my shirt and pulling me into her, pressing her lips against mines.

I smiled and shook my head before heading out the door. I jumped in my Lexus IS 350 and peeled off. I was on a straight mission. I had to get my people on the trail of this nigga Black so I could let him know who the real boss was.

I hurried home from the corner store; I had just got word that Budz was out of jail. News sure traveled fast because according to the nigga who worked at the corner store he ain't even been out two hours and the news was all over the city. I was happy as hell. I rushed through the front door and as usual the house was packed, niggas was everywhere.

“Guess who in the basement shootin' dice?” Sierra hurried over to me with a smile and asked.

“Who?” I asked, smiling as well, praying she said Budz.

“Budz,” she answered.

“So, I'm over Budz,” I said, pretending not to be happy.

“Whatever, bitch.” Sierra laughed.

“What he lookin' like?” I asked.

“Girrrrrl, that nigga big as fuck! He musta been workin' out while he was locked up,” Sierra replied, getting me fired up down below.

“I'm 'bouta go down there,” I said, nervously. “I need to get a quick buzz first.”

“For what?” Sierra asked, confused.

“To calm my fuckin' nerves,” I answered as I walked into the kitchen and opened the refrigerator. I pulled out a Redd's Apple Ale and took it to the head.

“Damn, bitch, you faced that shit.” Sierra laughed.

“Where Nik at?” I asked, before letting out a loud, manly belch.

“Ewwww, you nasty.” Sierra laughed. “She down in the basement.”

“You comin' wit' me?” I asked Sierra.

“Nope, I'm 'bouta go back in the living room and smoke up these niggas' weed. Nik down there so you'll be cool.”

“A'iiiight, fuck it, I'ma big girl,” I said. I flattened my hair with my hand, straightened up my clothes and headed down the basement stairs. When I got to the bottom of the stairs I turned up my face as if something smelled. The sight of Cordell turned my stomach, but when I laid eyes on Budz who was kneeling down shooting dice, my frown quickly turned into a smile.

“Wassup, Blu?” Cordell smiled, making Budz turn around to look at me.

He took a double take and smiled. He must have noticed how much I'd grown into a young woman. He smiled widely, stood up and walked over to me. I instantly got wet as he made his way over to me. He looked good as fuck with his fresh fade, a crispy white T with the crispy all-white Air Max to match and his Levi 505s saggin' just right. Sierra was right; he must have been working out while he was in the county locked up 'cause the sleeves of his shirt was tightly hugging his guns.

“What's up, sis?” he said, wrapping his arms around me.

Nikki rolled her eyes and smacked her lips as Budz hugged me. For the life of me, I didn't know what was wrong with her. She was okay before I left the house earlier but anything could have happened while I was gone giving her an attitude. Knowing her it was something minor. She hopped off the pool table and stomped up the basement stairs with a straight attitude.

“How you been?” he asked, looking me up and down.

“I been good,” I replied with a smile.

“I heard,” he said.

“Heard what?” I asked, hoping he hadn't heard about any of the shit I'd been out here doing in these streets. If so, I know my chances of ever being with him was shot to hell.

“Come on, nigga, and shoot the dice,” one of his niggas said before he could reply.

“We'll talk.” He winked before turning to walk away to finish his game, sending my pound puppy into a straight frenzy.

 

 

For the next two weeks I didn't know what had gotten into Nikki. She had started acting real funny toward me. It was like she was on her period every day; it had gotten to the point to where it was uncomfortable staying at her house. She would walk around for days without speaking to me. I tried to figure out what I had done to her and came up empty. I even asked Sierra to see if she had a clue. Sierra assured me she had been emotionally unstable ever since she decided to have that abortion at almost four months pregnant and children services taking her kids and giving her mother temporary custody until Nikki got her shit together. I guessed that would mentally fuck a person up, but she didn't have to take it out on me. Not being able to take it anymore I went to my momma's house and begged her to let me come back home. She was dead set against it at first. Telling me the only way she would let me come back was if I promised to abide by all her dumb-ass rules or else she was gon' throw me out again, but this time for good. I agreed, even though I didn't want to. After listening to her continue to bitch about my promiscuous ways and my smart-ass mouth, I realized that there was no place like home.

I didn't think I would be missing the streets this damn bad; I'd only been on lock a few months. I was tired of the same old routine day after day. Playing cards or dominoes for Little Debbies, talking on the phone to my tired-ass baby mommas, going to rec to work out, chow, and reading my Bible was really getting old. Every now and then I would see some excitement when a nigga was getting his gravy knocked out his biscuit with a lock in a sock or getting shanked; other than that the atmosphere around this bitch was monotonous.

One day while getting dressed for my visit, I looked out my cell and saw a line of new inmates coming into the block with their property. I was hoping like hell I wasn't getting a new cellie. Every nigga they put in here with me always ended up checking into PC for different reasons, either owing a nigga money, trying to protect his ass, or just plain scared. It didn't matter to me why they left. I was glad they did. Just as I got finished getting dressed and was about ready to walk out of my cell, my new cellie came walking in the door.

Damn, just when I was getting used to being by myself,
I thought as I sized him up. He did the same to me. He was an older cat with thick-ass glasses. He was big as hell; I could tell this nigga lifted mad weights. I already had it made up in my mind that if he got out of line I couldn't fight him head up. I would have to shank the shit out of him.

“Wassup?” he asked, nodding his head.

“Sup?” I replied, pretending I was looking for something on my shelf.

“Waku,” he said holding out his hand for me to shake.

“Vomo,” I replied while shaking his hand.

“What do you call a bunch of grown men who's trapped in one place with no way out?” he asked out of nowhere.

I looked at this nigga like he was crazy. I didn't know if this nigga was trying to be the next Bernie Mac or what; all I knew was his question was rather odd.

“A buncha horny niggas,” I guessed.

“Just like I thought, another stupid muthafucka locked up with no sense!” he snapped.

“What?” I frowned, offended by this funny-looking nigga's comment.

“You heard me.” He frowned too.

“Jones, you got a visit,” the CO yelled right before I could respond.

I slowly walked out of my cell mean mugging dude the entire time. We was gon' have to finish this discussion when I got back from my visit. I didn't give a damn how big this nigga was. I was gon' have to let him know I was not the one to be disrespected. I pulled myself together as I headed to the visiting room; the last thing I wanted was for my mom to notice I had an attitude. Only thing that would do was make her worry about her baby boy while he was locked up. She had enough shit to deal with. After getting strip searched I put a smile on my face and headed her way. Our relationship hadn't been the same ever since she'd sent me away to boot camp, thinking that was gonna keep me out the streets. It had only made matters worse and lightweight had me resenting her. I'd felt like she'd been trying to get rid of me. It was still good though seeing the woman who gave birth to me. She was all I had left in this world. I had no brothers or sisters. Yeah, I had a lot of hoes, and my two baby mommas, but I knew they weren't gon' be in my corner my entire bid like my mom was gon' be. Knowing that made my bid easier and letting my resentment go even easier.

“Hey, baby.” She stood up and smiled as I walked over to her. She wrapped her arms around me and gave me one of the biggest hugs. I wrapped my arms around her as well and gave her a tight squeeze. It had been a long time since I'd hugged my mom. I didn't realize how much weight she'd lost since the last time I'd seen her. I felt bad knowing my mom was out there stressing, bout me and losing weight over it.

“Hey, Ma,” I replied while letting her go.

“You lookin' good, son,” she stepped back and said with a smile.

I wished I could say the same for her. Her face looked sunken in. I hoped she wasn't out there smoking again. “You look good too, Ma,” I said, not wanting to hurt her feelings.

“Yeah, right, boy. You don't have to lie to me. I know I look bad.”

“Naw, Ma, you look a'iiiight. You done lost a lot of weight, but other than that you still strapped,” I joked.

My mom laughed until she started coughing.

“You okay, Ma?” I asked, patting her on the back.

She shook her head yes as she continued to cough. After catching her breath, we laughed, talked, and ate everything we could out of the vending machine for the next two hours.

Ten minutes before visiting hours was over my mom looked over.

“You okay, Ma?” I asked, concerned.

“Vomo, I got somethin' to tell you,” she said.

“What is it, Ma?”

She looked at me while she tried to find the right words to say.

“What is it, Ma?” I asked again in a raised tone.

“Two months ago the doctor diagnosed me with pancreatic cancer,” she blurted out.

It took me a few minutes to process what my mom had just told me. “You'll be okay, Ma,” I said hopeful. “Don't they have some medicine out there that will help you live longer? Find out how much it cost and I'll pay for it.”

My mom grabbed both of my hands and held them inside of her tiny hands. “It's stage four; there's nothin' they can do for me,” she replied.

I refused to believe what she had just told me. “Well can't you find out, Ma?” I said as tears filled my eyes. I refused to cry; that's all one of these niggas needed to see and I would be bitch meat for real.

“Vomo, baby, I've tried everything,” she said shaking her head.

“How long?” I asked carefully, not knowing if I would be able to handle her answer.

“Any day. I'm just waitin',” she replied.

“Wow, Ma, why you wait so long to tell me?” I asked, hurt.

“Because I wanted you to have a good visit, baby. I didn't wanna worry you with all this mess. You got enough on your plate already,” she said, forcing a weak smile.

I didn't know how to react knowing this might be the last time I seen my mom. “Who gon' take care of me when you gone?” I asked.

“You a grown man, Vomo. I've been preparin' you for my death ever since you were a little boy. Do you remember me always tellin' you I wasn't gon' always be around for you to lean on?”

I slowly shook my head yes. I could remember hearing my mom telling me that at least a thousand times but it never registered until now that it was really happening.

“Visit over,” the CO called out.

“Listen, baby, I just want to apologize to you in person for not bein' a good mother, but all I knew how to do was to do my best. I'm goin' to put your money in a bank account so it will be there when you get out. I will keep puttin' money on your books until I'm not able to.”

“Okay,” I responded, not knowing what else to say.

“Please, promise me that you will get your life together and take good care of my grandbabies when they let you outta here.”

“I promise,” I said, hoping I could keep it.

“Visitors, let's go!” the CO yelled loudly.

My mom stood up and wrapped her frail arms around me. “I love you, Vomo.”

“I love you too, Ma,” I said as she turned to walk away.

She looked back at me one last time before heading out the door. My heart was so heavy as I watched her walk away. I still couldn't wrap my mind around the fact that my mom would no longer be around to rub my bruises or heal my broken heart. She was all I had. With that being said, I went back to the pod and waited for my cellie to leave for rec and for the first time in a long time, I cried like a bitch!