Providence (27 page)

I unwrapped the package and found a home manicure set inside. I had never owned anything like that before. Mama and Daddy would have made me throw that right out. I wondered how Dottie had found nail polish in the same shades as the wrapping paper and bows. In the bottom of the box there was a package of writing cards, with brightly colored fingernails across the front of them. I handed Baby Girl’s gift to Rosie to open. “Can you do it for her?” I asked. “I don’t think she can do it, and if you unwrap I can hold her so she can see it.”

Rosie tore through the paper. Inside was a hot pink sweater. Dottie’s gifts had a real theme to them. “You won’t lose sight of Georgia if she is wearing this,” Rosie laughed.

I put the sweater on Baby Girl. “I think it looks pretty on her,” I said.

Rosie took a good look at Baby Girl and smiled. “Everything looks pretty on her.”

We watched an old black-and-white Christmas movie on television, another one of Rosie’s traditions, before going to bed. After I settled Rosie into bed for the night, I dug out the Christmas book I had brought home from the store. I read it to Baby Girl, just like I used to read it to my brothers and sisters at home. I had read that poem so many times, I practically didn’t need the pages to recite Clement C. Moore’s words. When I finished, I wiped Baby Girl’s nose one more time and rubbed her back until she fell asleep. Then I hurried down the hall as fast as my bad foot would let me go, and stepped into the shower. The warm water seemed to wash away all my worries of the day. When I finished, I climbed into bed with my hair soaking wet, and fell fast asleep.

My hair hadn’t had a chance to dry before Baby Girl woke me with her tears. I spent most of the night on my feet bobbing and swaying with Baby Girl in my arms. Nothing seemed to soothe her, as her little nose got stuffier and her cough became more regular. Finally, when the sun rose, she fell asleep. I knew it wouldn’t last long, so as soon her head touched the sheets, I crawled into my bed.

I had not even pulled the blankets over me, when I heard Rosie calling my name. I dragged myself out of bed and hobbled over to her room. After I helped her to the bathroom, Rosie looked me over from head to toe and said, “That’s a good idea. Why don’t we stay in our sleep clothes all day. We can’t get out to church, so there is no reason for us to dress up.”

I should have offered to help Rosie into a clean nightgown, but I barely had the energy to dress myself. Instead, I just nodded in agreement. I settled her in her kitchen chair and I put the kettle on to boil. Rosie reminded me about Dottie’s gift, and I limped off to the parlor. As I came back from fetching the muffins, the phone was ringing. When I lifted the phone off the hook, I looked out the window for the first time that day. Tiny crystals of ice coated the stairs, grass, and tree limbs. The ice was still falling from the sky. The bits of ice pinged as they hit the window.

Lily was calling to make sure we were all right. I brought the phone over to Rosie and let her deal with Lily’s concerns. I wanted to get breakfast out of the way before Baby Girl started demanding my attention. When I set Rosie’s teacup before her, she quickly said her goodbyes and handed me the phone to put away. “Where’s Georgia this morning?” she asked. “Did all the Christmas Eve excitement wear her out?”

I sat down across from Rosie. “Georgia was up most of the night with a cold. She’s catching up with some of her sleep needs now.”

“Christmas or not,” Rosie said, “if you need the doctor, you call him now. Does she have a fever? Is she drinking?”

“She was a little warm last night, but she seems normal now. She has a stuffy nose and a cough. She has a hard time drinking her bottle with her nose so stuffed up, but she is getting plenty to drink, even if it takes a long time. I don’t think we need to call Doc out in an ice storm.”

“Okay, well, her cold explains why you are moving around here like a robot in one of those old space alien movies. If she didn’t get any shuteye last night, I’m sure you didn’t either. Why don’t you go lay down now?” Rosie said.

I wanted to jump at her suggestion, but I was worried about leaving her awake and unattended. I didn’t have time to talk myself into it before Baby Girl started crying out for me. When I returned to the table with Baby Girl in my arms, Rosie had another plan to offer. “Why don’t I go back to bed, and you can put Georgia in there with me? I can keep an eye on her while you take a nap.”

Another tempting offer, but it only took a few seconds of contemplating this one for me to picture Baby Girl rolling off the bed and Rosie tumbling after her. “I’ll take a nap later, when she dozes off again. Let’s go open the gifts. I can’t wait for you to see what I made for you.”

Hours later, I was knee-deep in wrapping paper, and Rosie had replaced the old afghan with the new lap quilt I had made for her. I cleared some space for Baby Girl’s new quilt and laid her down with one of her new toys. I gathered the paper and bows, moved everything back under the tree, and dropped onto the couch. Baby Girl was happy rolling back and forth on her quilt and chewing on the toy keys. I decided to leave her be, and take a moment to breathe. I don’t know if it was the fact that I had gone two days with nothing more than a couple of cat naps or if it was all the twinkling colored lights, but I looked at the tree and burst into tears. “What’s wrong?” Rosie asked.

I wanted to stop the flood of salty tears washing down my face, but I couldn’t. “You come on over here,” Rosie ordered.

I did as I was told and sat on the floor by Rosie’s feet. I was sobbing so hard, I couldn’t catch my breath. I was missing Mama, and my sisters and brothers, something fierce right now. Worse than that, I was filled with shame over all the lies I’d been telling since arriving in Watson’s Grove. Every gift I’d opened today, every act of kindness, came from someone I had lied to, someone who deserved more respect than I had paid them. Rosie reached over and swept the hair from my face. “You’re missing your family today, aren’t you? I know they must be missing you, too. You go out there in the kitchen and you call them up right now. I don’t need to know who they are, or why you left. You don’t need to explain anything, and I don’t need to know anything. You go ahead now.”

Rosie was wrong. Rosie, who gave me a job, was wrong. Rosie, who gave us a home, a family, and a community, was wrong. She did need to know, and I did need to tell her. I rested my head on her knees and tried to stop my sobbing. Rosie stroked my hair, and for a few minutes the sound of my heaving breaths filled the room. Then the words started pouring out of my mouth like the tears from my eyes. I told her about Mama, Daddy, and my brothers and sisters. I told her about the barn and the boxcar. Then I told her about Baby Girl. When I was done, Rosie whispered, “I’m sorry, Becky. I shouldn’t have made you hold this all inside for so long. It’s going to be all right. Everything is going to be all right. I promise.”

I sat there praying her words would come true. I felt something touch my leg, and my head jerked up. It was Baby Girl. It took a minute to set in my head. She had never moved anywhere on her own before. But here she was. She had rolled onto her belly and crept the couple of feet over to me. She grabbed onto my leg with one hand and pitched forward. Before I could pick her up, she had picked herself up and was balancing on her arms and belly. She gave us a big smile, and Rosie and I both said, “Look, she’s crawling on all fours, and she has her first tooth!” It was barely there, but sure enough, a little white pearl was peeking above her gums.

Rosie bent over and hugged my shoulders. “This surely is a day of milestones for our family.”

CHAPTER 30

The next few days were filled with sorting and packing. Neither Rosie nor I spoke of the secrets I had shared. Baby Girl’s new freedom of movement meant she had to reside on my hip as I readied our things for the move. She was getting big, and my hip and back would ache some by the end of the day, but it was the safest place for her to be. I kept waiting for Rosie to experience a change of heart; I thought seeing her life get packed into old grocery cartons would make her want to stay in her own home. The change never came. Rosie seemed resigned to the move. I collapsed onto my bed each night, exhausted from the day’s labor, but sleep usually escaped me. Instead, I lay in my bed, stared at the ceiling, and replayed my Christmas confession to Rosie.

When moving day arrived, John pulled up in front of the house. A big moving truck pulled up to the curb right behind him. Four men got out of the truck and rolled up its back door. John led them into the house, and they wasted no time before lugging the boxes out to the truck. “Well, ladies, are you ready to go?” John asked. “Your chariot awaits you.”

Rosie frowned. “I don’t know if I can get up into your truck, John.”

“I already thought of that. I have the car today,” he said, grinning.

“I should have known you would have thought of everything, John,” Rosie said, patting his arm. “Let’s go, Becky.”

“Why don’t I stay behind until they get everything in the truck?” I offered. “We don’t want them to miss anything.”

Rosie shook her head. “These men know their job, I’m sure. I don’t want you hanging about, getting sad about moving. It’s best we keep moving forward, and not look back.”

I nodded and dressed Baby Girl in her winter jacket, hat, and mittens. I grabbed her diaper bag and flung it over my free shoulder. I followed John and Rosie out the door, all the while rubbing my cheek against Baby Girl’s forehead. Feeling the softness of her skin against mine gave me the courage to follow Rosie’s advice, and not look back.

Rosie and I sat in the back seat of the car with Georgia buckled into her car seat between us. As John drove past the Second Hand Rose, my eyes welled up with tears and I had to turn away to keep Rosie from knowing. Rosie started humming “Sweet Georgia Brown” and helped Baby Girl clap her hands to the beat. I turned back to watch and saw Baby Girl’s whole self smiling. By the time John pulled into Lily’s long driveway, Rosie was belting out the chorus and swinging to the beat in her seat, and Baby Girl was laughing out loud. Despite my concerns, I found myself laughing and singing along.

When the car came to a stop, I was surprised to see Lily waiting at the door for us. I had never seen her open her own door before. Something else was different, too. It took me a few steps for it to click into my brain. Lily wasn’t carrying her cane. As we passed through the doorway, Lily smiled and said, “Welcome home! Mrs. Harper will organize the moving men when they get here. Why don’t we go into the parlor and rest a bit before lunch?”

I knew that was another one of those questions not looking for an answer, so I followed Rosie and Lily into the parlor. Watching Lily sweep across the room with Rosie under her wing reminded me of my favorite picture in the hymnbook at church. In the picture, a dove with both wings opened wide is sweeping down from the heavens. I was a different story though. My big toe was still giving me trouble, and with Baby Girl on one hip and her diaper bag on the other I looked more like a pack mule making my way through a canyon. There was nothing peaceful or graceful in the way I was moving. There was nothing making me look like I belonged in that house.

The heavy drapes in the parlor had been pushed open to allow the sunshine to pour into the room. Lily and Rosie set to talking right away. I couldn’t concentrate on their conversation, so I just kept nodding my head, every so often pausing to hope I hadn’t agreed to anything I shouldn’t have. The excitement of the car ride had tuckered Baby Girl out, so she passed the time napping in my arms. When she woke up, I knew it was time for me to rejoin the world, too. “Excuse me, Lily, but I need to be getting Georgia her lunch. May I use your kitchen to fix her something?” I asked.

Lily shook her head. “I want you to start thinking of this place as home, Becky. It isn’t my kitchen, it’s our kitchen, and you don’t need permission to roam around your own home.” She looked at her watch and added, “Actually, I think all of our lunches should be ready now.”

The words had no sooner passed her lips than Mrs. Harper came into the parlor to announce as much. When we settled in the dining room, I was surprised to find my work done for me. Not only was there lunch for the three of us, but the cook had prepared a special meal for Baby Girl. I must have been half asleep before, because I hadn’t heard a peep of noise from the movers, but Baby Girl’s highchair was set up in the dining room. I looked down at the flowered rug under my feet and started worrying about Baby Girl’s dining etiquette. We would wear out our welcome quickly if she spit her sweet potatoes all over that rug. When I went around the table, I was relieved to see a cloth spread out under her chair. Mrs. Harper must have raised some babies of her own.

I fed Baby Girl before turning to my own plate. I had barely gotten a bite in when Lily decided to turn the subject of conversation to me. “I looked into the art classes at the college John attends,” she began. “You can take up to two courses this coming semester and then apply to be a full-time student for the summer sessions. You can take the GED next week, and your scores should be in quickly enough for you to be allowed to take the college classes. I know it is short notice, but I talked to someone and received permission for your late registration, and I’m certain you are ready for the test. We can do some review work to boost your confidence. You can drive the car John picked you up in today to get to school. I know it is a little stuffy-looking for a young girl, but it will do until we get you something more suitable.”