Pulse (2 page)

I sit on the edge of the bathtub, my heel tapping a rhythmic beat onto the tile floor. I stare down at my phone. I've already been in here for five minutes. Why isn't Rebecca texting me back? I need her words of reassurance that I can do this without making a total not-very-experienced-in-bed fool of myself.

I almost slam my phone onto the side of the tub in utter frustration. I wanted this. I was the one who decided that my life in Bloomfield, Connecticut wasn’t for me anymore. Being Jessie Roth, the girlfriend of
Josh Redmond was utterly unfulfilling. When I met Josh during my training to become a paramedic, he seemed like the all American guy I wanted. Now, that I'd left him and moved to Manhattan, all I desperately craved was to experience life. Nathan was my first step towards that. Once, I jumped into that very large king bed I saw in the bedroom when I walked down the hallway, I'd finally get to have an experience I'd always craved. One night with a man who could make me feel things I'd only imagined. He'd already proven he knew how to make me come as soon as we walked into his suite.

I dial Rebecca's number and there's no answer. I curse before I end the call without leaving a voice mail. I have to do this on my own. I have to find the courage to just jump in head first and, at the very least, pretend I know what I'm doing. There wasn't going to be any pep talk from my best friend.

I take a deep breath before I pull the black dress I'm wearing from my body. I adjust my black lace bra and panties before I smooth my long hair behind my back. If I'm going to do this, I'm going to do it with a bang. I tuck my phone back into my clutch, fold my dress and place them both on the counter. It was now or never. With one last deep breath, I open the washroom door.

The faint sound of low music greets me as I step back into the hallway. I can feel my heart pounding in my chest. I try my best to saunter down the hallway with some semblance of sexiness. I realize fairly quickly that I look more awkward than alluring so I pick up my pace and move swiftly back towards the room where I left Nathan.

My eyes shoot around the room when I don't see him standing next to the counter where he had poured our drinks. The one meant for me is still there, untouched, the ice almost melted. I move further into the room. He's not by the massive window that offers an uncompromising view of Times Square. As I turn to walk back towards the bedroom I see him. The man I imagined bringing me a depth of pleasure that I'd only fantasized about, the man who had made me come with just a few smooth glides of his hand was sprawled out flat on his back on the couch, fast asleep.

***

"Do you want to meet for lunch today?" There was a slight pause. "My treat."

I smile at my roommate's continuing insistence on paying for absolutely everything. "No. I'll make something and bring it down to your office. Maybe that curried quinoa salad you raved about?"

"Really?" Her green eyes brighten at the suggestion. "I told my boss all about that. She was almost drooling."

I laugh at the thought. "You're exaggerating."

"I'm not ." She scoops up her keys from the kitchen counter. "Cassandra is actually looking for a private chef right now. You'd be perfect for that."

"If I had gone to culinary school I'd be perfect for that," I groan. "No one wants to hire someone who doesn't have formal training." I recite the phrase I've heard countless times at dozens of restaurants since I'd arrived in the city. I was down to my last few saved dollars and if I didn't land something soon, I'd be up to my elbows in dishwater just as a way to get my foot in the door. Cooking was my passion and I wanted it to be my career.

"I'll mention you to her this morning." Rebecca pulls a banana from a basket on the counter. "I can't wait for lunch."

I smile at her enthusiasm. "I'll be there right at noon."

"Hey, Jess." She tilts her head to the side and I know what that means. She's about to talk about sex. It's a telling gesture and one that she's always unconsciously done since we were in middle school together.

"He fell asleep," I murmur.

"What?" The shrill tone of the question forces me to take a step back.

"I went to the washroom and he was out cold when I got back." I shake my head. "It was beyond humiliating."

"So nothing happened?" She settles onto one of the wooden stools next to the counter.

"Something happened." I might as well just get the conversation over with. "When we got to his room he helped me come."

"So you had sex?"

"I had sex with his finger." I shrug my shoulders and bite back a laugh. "It was great finger sex."

She giggles causing her tall frame to shake. "At least you'll always have the memory of Mr. Fingers."

I roll my eyes at the nickname. "His name is Nathan. Not that it matters. I blew my chance. Or rather, I didn't get a chance to blow him."

"We'll just try again tonight." Her grin is genuine. "I was so jealous of how hot the guy was you left with that I didn't hang around long. Maybe tonight we'll both get lucky."

"Not me." I shake my head. "I'm bowing out. The universe is telling me that I'm not a one night stand kind of girl."

Her brows shoot up. "You're wrong. It's like swimming in the ocean, Jess. When you first jump in the water it's freezing and your body has to get used to it. Sleeping with men in Manhattan is like that. At first, you wonder how you'll ever warm up to the idea and then once you're in bed with a man who can make you come over and over again in one night, you'll never want to stop."

"I was almost in bed with a man like that." I hold her gaze. "It was a disaster. He couldn't stay awake long enough to fuck me."

"That's why we're getting back in the saddle tonight."

"I'm going to keep my feet on the ground and my ass in my own bed. Thank you very much." I tip my head to her as she chuckles and turns to leave.

"I gave my lunch away," Rebecca screams above the loud buzz of the music.

I pull my eyes up over the edge of the glass that I have pursed to my lips. "I'll try not to take that personally."

"To my boss, Cassandra." She shoots her eyes around the crowded club not once settling them on me. "She loved it. She wants to meet you."

"You're kidding?" I was teetering on the verge of jumping up and down at the news but I wasn't sure the strapless black dress I was wearing would cooperate.

"Tomorrow at eleven." She motions behind my head. "Bring something for her to eat and she'll hire you. The way to that woman's check book is definitely through her stomach."

I turn around and I realize she's gesturing to two men staring directly at us. I give out a loud groan at the thought of diving back into the one nightstand pool after only wading in the shallow end last night. 

"I'll take the blonde and you can have the other one." She slinks past me and grabs hold of my hand before I have a chance to protest. I don't want the other one. I don't want the blonde either. I want my bed and my pillow and a good night's sleep. Being back at this club after my humiliating experience in a hotel room, just a few floors above us less than twenty-four hours ago, is not the optimal way I'd like to be spending my Tuesday night.

"I'm Rebecca, this is Jess." She slurs both of our names before letting out an animated giggle. What the hell happened to her during the ten feet it took us to walk over here? Is she actually pretending to be drunk?

"What's wrong with you?" I see no reason to not call her out on her obvious bullshit.

"Jess, don't curse." She plants her index finger over my lips and throws me a wink.

I shake my head in utter disbelief. I stare blankly at her while she launches into a convoluted story about how she works as a lingerie model. Who in their right mind would believe that? From the wide grin on the blonde's face, I'd guess she just baited him hook, line and sinker.

"What do you do?"

It takes an endless moment before I realize that the male voice asking the question is actually coming from the man standing next to me. I turn my head and I'm a little surprised by how attractive he really is. His brown eyes almost match the hue of his hair. He's young, perhaps even my age.

"Hopefully by the end of the day tomorrow I'll be a personal chef."

"Cool." He nods his head up and down as if he's searching for the next words that should be coming out of his mouth.

"What about you?" I offer, all the while my eyes are glued to Rebecca. Judging by the way she's got her arms draped over the blonde guy's shoulders, I'd venture a guess that she won't be going home with me.

"What about me?" He leans in closer and I pull back yet again.

"What do you do for a living?" I enunciate every syllable. I don't want him to think that anything beyond a brief conversation is going to happen between the two of us tonight.

He holds his hand up to his ear and gestures. The pounding of the music is making it harder and harder for me to think straight, let alone hear him.

Despite the fact that I feel incredibly uncomfortable, I lean closer to repeat the question. The scent of him, a mix of cigarettes and cheap cologne assaults my senses right away. I need to get away from him, and from this place. Coming back here was a mistake and now that Rebecca has a bedfellow for the night, I can finally make a run for the door.

His breath is thick and hot on my neck as he whispers in my ear that he works as a maintenance worker at a building in lower Manhattan.

I smile and nod my head not caring an ounce about how he spends his days, or how he'll spend tonight. I look at my hands, studying the fine lines on my palms while he goes on and on about what his plans for next weekend are. There's finally a break in the muted tone of his voice. I look up and he's staring right behind me. His radar must be locked on another woman. Small miracles do happen. I move to take a step back and I'm instantly aware of a presence behind me.

A large hand presses against my stomach as the feeling of a man's hard body pushes into my back. "Jessica." His voice has a frustrated note to it. "There you are."

I turn slowly. I don't need to. I already know who it is just be the scent of his skin. It's him. He looks even more devastatingly handsome than he did last night.

"Hey, sleepyhead."

A slight frown pulls at the skin on his forehead. "Are you going to introduce me to your friend?"

"No," I say impassively. I have no intention of talking to either of these men for longer than ten seconds, if at all possible. "He's not my friend."

His intense blue eyes scan my face before jumping back to the man standing behind me. "I need a moment."

"Dude, now?" I hear the pleading voice of the man I was just talking to. I'm feeling a rush of relief at the idea of being pulled from the clutches of the conversation I was having with him.

"A minute, dude." Nathan stares at my face as he throws the words back at him.

I smile at the sound of such a misplaced word on his lips. He's the definition of culture and refinement. The suit he's wearing tonight is grey pinstriped, the white shirt underneath open at the collar to reveal just a hint of that toned chest I got to see last night.

I don't turn to look as he pulls me by my waist into the crowd. I scan the masses trying to find Rebecca but the effort is useless. I can barely walk through the throngs of people. There's no way I'd be able to pick her out in this place.

I freeze once I realize he's pulling me towards the entrance of the hotel. "Wait."

His eyes lower to mine. "It's quieter there."

"No." I stand my ground on the edge of the dance floor. "I'm not going back up there with you."

"Why?" He leans down, his breath forging a path on my bare shoulder.  My nipples instantly harden at the sensation.

"It wasn't meant to be." I try to add a lighthearted lilt to my tone but it comes across much more jubilant than I intend.

"I didn't get a chance to finish what I started." He reaches to pull me closer and I take a step back. I can't want him again. Last night was so humiliating.

"There are dozens of women here who would love to go upstairs with you." I turn and his hand stays steady at my waist. "Look at that one right there. She'd be all over you in a flash." I nod my head towards a striking brunette who has her eyes locked on Nathan. Who could blame her? He's the definition of beautiful.

"I want to go upstairs with you." His hand is on my stomach again, pulling me into him. "I don't give up easily."

I sigh at the sensation of his body against mine. I should just swallow my pride and go upstairs. I wanted him last night. Nothing has changed. As soon as I heard his voice tonight I was instantly aroused.

"I'm going to have you." He pushes the hair from my shoulder as his lips trace a path across my skin. "Come upstairs with me. One night, Jessica."

I turn, my hand snaking up his shirt before it settles on his chin. "One night."

A smile pulls on the corner of his lips as he takes me by the hand. I follow him silently as we walk through the hotel lobby again. When the young woman calls a greeting to him, this time he doesn't react. His gaze is focused forward, his hand gently tugging on mine.

The moment we step into the elevator, his lips are on my mouth. I melt into his embrace. He's so tall, so strong,  and so incredibly masculine. I moan slightly as he traces a path along my lower lip with his tongue.

I feel deprived when he pulls away from the kiss as the elevator stops on the eighteenth floor. He takes my hand in his again. There's silence as he dashes to the door of his suite, key card in hand.

I take one last, full breath before he opens the door, pulling me inside.