Purgatorium (54 page)

I look back and muster up enough of my strength to make it back to the book. I swing her arms to snatch it up. Looking ahead, I see the dark creature walking out of the fire on four legs. Through the flames, I see its pointed ears and the creature’s head bearing a canine resemblance. I swiftly wrap my arms around the little girl, covering her from any harm.

Behind me, Stephanie hurries to get the restaurant doors open. Right when I turn my head, the fiery creature rushes to me and forcefully stops, getting mere inches away from my face. I gaze into its devilish blackened eyes. A red hot flame glistens from their dark pupils. Its breath releases cold air onto my face. It leans its face closer and begins to sniff at me. It looks back up, almost calm. It doesn’t seem to want me, I think.

The creature starts to cool down, making the flames from its body structure start to ice over. The fire around the creature’s body slowly turns it into pieces of frozen icicles sticking straight up like ice picks throughout its whole exterior. I am going to call it, Spikey, I think, mocking the beast.

It looks down to where I am hiding her. It sniffs and begins to growl. Its neck pulls back as I hear sounds of chains rustling behind it. I begin to see something around its neck, forcing it back. The beast is so big that its dog collar looks like a belt that a body builder would use. I see a chain attached to its collar and follow it. The chain leads to the hands of a reaper. It seems to be holding it by the reins like a dog.

The reaper pulls on the reins as it makes a loud screeching noise. The razor tries to pull away from its chain. I slowly back away as the beast begins to growl and sand pours out of its mouth like foam. I know it has caught the little girl’s scent, but why not mine, I wonder.

The heat coming from the flames warms my body enough to get my strength back. The ground from under me turns to ice as I look back to see the reaper has extended out its legs onto the concrete. I look back to see the doors are getting frozen over as well. I watch Stephanie trying to break the ice off the door to get it open.

I turn over and gaze up at the hellhound showing its sharp fangs inches from my nose. The razor’s mouth opens wide and quickly lunges. The little girl forces her way out of my grip and holds the book up. The creature’s sharp crystallized teeth bite down on the book, instantly shattering one of its fangs in the process. This is my chance!

I quickly break off one of the icicles from the razor’s shoulder and bring the sharp end straight down, jamming it into the razor’s eye. It yelps in pain. I tighten my hold back onto the little girl, stand up, turn my body, and run for the door.

The now one-eyed razor darts towards me as the velocity of the creature’s speed ignites a spark in its chain. The chain begins to catch fire, sending the flames towards the reaper’s hands. The reaper gazes out as if it were playing fetch, with me assuming the role of the stick.

Stephanie breaks off the last remaining blocks of ice and gets the doors open. I quickly dive in as the razor makes a leap towards us. We make it through as our bodies slide across the restaurant’s frigid floor. Stephanie immediately tries to shut the door as the razor comes through, breaking the frosty door into icy splinters.

Looking out the window, I all of a sudden see a reaper caught in the headlights. An unknown car speeds across the road, smashing right into it. The car continues to drive off as I notice it was my BMW. The reaper skids across the icy pavement with the chain going with it. The chain jerks the razor sideways causing its paws slip on the frosty surface floor. The beast begins piercing its claws against the iced- over gravel but the force is too much. It flies back, getting farther and farther away from us. I hear the creature’s sharp shriek from almost 50 feet away. I see the car making a sharp turn onto the interstate.

Whoever is in that car must be drawing the reaper out and away from us.

The reaper gains its ground and takes back hold of the chain while forcing the razor back. The chain begins rolling itself back in as the hellhound stumbles around trying to burn its claws into the frozen cement. The snow is heavy on the ground making the chain sound soften.

I watch as the reaper takes the hound by its collar and unlocks it. All of a sudden, I see the hound implode into sand. The reaper takes the unlocked collar, dusting off the sand, and wraps it around its waist. It locks the collar back in, wearing it now as a belt, and watches me as cold steam levitates off its shoulders. Its legs wrinkle themselves back in the cloak and the reaper flies off towards the car.

That is the second time today that person has helped me, I think to myself. I wonder which angel it is?

Stephanie looks to me and says, “We should be fine for now. You are in the right time zone and the razor has to follow its master.”

What in the hell was that?
is all I can think. I can almost feel the little girl’s tight grip around me. She eases off as her strangle hold turns into a warm hug. I am stunned at first until I think about my little Anna and how I would have felt if she had survived the crash. I hold her tightly for a few seconds, then look up to see Stephanie smiling at the moment.

“Thank you,” Stephanie kindly says to me. I look at her confused as to why she would thank me.Stephanie is looking at who I am holding and I can see now she was referring to my saving the little girl. The girl lifts her head to me and says, “Thank you.”

Stephanie walks over. “I hate to break up this soulful family reunion but she must be going. Our mutual friend in the car needs some help getting back home okay.”

The little girl lets go and nods to Stephanie. She looks back to me and kisses me on the cheek. Her lips leave a lasting coldness that makes me shiver. She hands me back the Handbook and softly says to me, “It’s your armor.” She places it in my hands.

Before I can think of anything, she is up and out the side door. I look down at the Handbook, thinking back at all the times it has actually protected me.
Why is that?
I wonder. I get up, turn to look out the broken door, and see the little girl running back towards the park. Will she be safe by herself?

Stephanie looks over next to me. “I can see worry in your eyes. Don’t. She will be fine. She has been doing this just as long, if not longer, than the both of us. She is a lost soul that never stood a chance.”

I turn to her. Stephanie says, “She was in her mom’s womb when her mother got into a coma. I found her alone looking for her. We never could find where she was. I have been taking care of her ever since. Well I guess
we
have. It’s kinda weird to say but we are the only family she’s got.”

I look back out and she is gone. I struggle with the thought of not remembering her, wishing I still did.

“Her name is Lily,” Stephanie says, seeing that I am having trouble remembering the little girl’s name. “I could use a drink.” She nods to the stairs. We walk up together as I think back to what just happened.

“Those were Razors. As you well know, reapers are the time keepers but their watchdogs are like lost soul hunters. Like Lily and myself.”

I stop and look at her, not understanding their purpose. She stops halfway up the stairs and turns to me, raising up her hand. “Touch me.” I place my fingers around her wrist, remembering where I felt this type of feeling before. It’s like taking hold of a big snowball. “Cold to the touch, don’t you think?” she replies.

I release my fingers away from her wrist, feeling the coldness turning back to feeling nothing but numb.

“Reapers are attracted to heat signatures like yourself. Since your human body hasn’t been claimed, its only purpose is to just lie there basking itself in room temperature. While for lost souls like me, our bodies have been stricken away from us, making our temperature reach far below freezing level.”

She continues on the stairs yelling back, “And yes. I do feel cold all the time. You just get use to it. Let’s hope you don’t have to,” she says with a saddened voice.

I make it to the top, see Stephanie entering the kitchen, and walk over to the table I usually would sit at. I think it is time for something different. I turn and walk outside on the balcony and sit at a table. Relaxing for what short minutes I have, I take out my book that I had written and begin reading it. Completely absorbed in the story, I lose all sense of my surroundings.

“Looks like a good book you’re reading there,” Stephanie says walking past me. She lays the silver container on the table and sits across from me. I look up to her and realize that she isn’t just the waitress or a lost soul, she is a person that I have learned to trust.

“You let me read it once or twice,” she says blushing. “Page 57. Last paragraph. Gets me every time I read it.”

I turn to the page and get to the last paragraph. I’m about to read it until Stephanie starts speaking the words by memory.

“The mind is the keeper of frozen memories. From the small moments of learning how to speak to the big moments of finally finding your soul mate. After awhile they may thaw and leave you forgetting but that’s just time’s way of saying that you have learned enough. You may not be able to choose what goes or what stays, but if the life you lead kept you forever grateful then all you have are cherished moments. Hope, faith, love, understanding, grace. It’s all in your mind. It’s forever growing. Forever learning. Use it and do good.”

She stops. “I may have read it more than twice,” she says blushing.

It can’t be that simple, I think to myself. If it was, then I wouldn’t be here. I need to stay focused and not get myself distracted from unmemorable written words by a man that no longer exists.

I fold the book up and place it on the table. Looking around the restaurant, I notice a chandelier that is not switched on. That must be where another black light is placed. My eyes focus back to Stephanie as I see her eyes beginning to glisten.

“My husband was a lot like who you were,” Stephanie continues. “He always wanted something better—better car, better house, better life, and even a better wife. Every night he would come home drunk and beat me because…to be honest, there really was no because. He just did it because it made him feel better about his life and I just took it. I took it because I thought I deserved it. He cheated on me more times than I can remember. I never said anything though. I guess I was afraid, too. I now wish I would have said something.”

Stephanie’s face gets pale white as if she is afraid of what to say next. “One day we went to the park. We were laughing and actually for a second I thought maybe he changed. I told him I was one month pregnant. I told him that I hid it from him because his job was stressing him out for the last few months. I didn’t want to put more stress on him. He didn’t see it that way. He hit me and I fell. It felt like I fell so far.”

Stephanie begins to tear up. “My stomach collided on top of a railing. That’s when I knew I lost the baby…” Stephanie starts sobbing. I reach across the table and grasp her hand.

“She was going to be called Ally.” She takes my hand and holds it, looking sorrowfully at me.

“Then one night he came home, drunk. This time he hit a little bit too hard. Bata bing, Bata boom. I wake back up and I am stuck in a place like this.

“There were voices that whispered to me all the time about Ally and how she was still alive. They also spoke on all the things they would do if they saw my husband again. I won’t lie when I say that I liked every scenario they played out for me on torturing him. It kept me sane thinking of all the ways to bring him pain. Then they told me that they were a part of me and that they could bring him to justice. I just had to do a trial first to get it. So I did. After I beat it, they gave me two choices. Either I could come out of my coma and go back to my horrible life with my cheating husband. Or I could let them take up residence in my body and get revenge on him. Which meant I would stay in my coma and look for my daughter. Once I found her, they would switch back was the deal. So…I let them take up residence in my body. After searching for her a long time, I knew the voices had lied to me. They were not voices at all. They were my demons that I had carried with me for so many years. To be honest with myself, I knew deep down the voices were something evil but I just didn’t care. I wanted to see my daughter. I wanted to tell her sorry. I wanted her to know…”

Stephanie takes a moment to breathe.

“I gave into my demons because I saw no other way. Don’t let them do the same to you! Don’t be like me!” She looks up at me pleadingly.

I see the
hourglass
reflection in the silver container has just turned over.

40 Minutes

I stand, sympathetically squeezing her hand one last time before letting go.

Stephanie looks up at me and says, “It’s a great book you wrote! She would be very proud of you.”

I look at her trying to control my emotions. The thought of Madi makes me think on how she could be gone forever. If she is, she’ll never get a chance to see how much I’ve changed and how much she really means to me. But if she is alive, then that means my little Anna would be gone. It’s true I hardly know her but she is the most beautiful thing my eyes have ever witnessed.

I need to know who is playing the record on the outside. I look down at the Handbook, almost as if I am praying for an answer. Maybe I can trust her. I should let her know about the hidden messages and the black light.